"I can't believe you, Diana," Akko said, trying her best to hold back tears. "After all we've been through together, you actually do something like this! How could you?!"

"You're surprised?" Diana asked. "Nothing that's happened between us could ever have anything to do with this, Akko. Frankly, it's rather insulting that you're naive enough to think otherwise." It was at this point that Akko actually did start crying.

During the entire time that Akko had known Diana, the two of them had gone through dangerous situation after dangerous situation, together. Fighting Diana's aunt and cousins so she could claim her inheritance. Flying into the stratosphere to blow up a magic nuclear missile and prevent World War Five. Forcing down their respective feelings of anxiety in their attempts to ask the other one out. Each situation tested their bond with each other more than the last, but if Akko had to weigh in on the matter, she would say that the current predicament her and her girlfriend were in had more weight put into it than all three combined, and the end result could very well make or break their relationship.

However, given the fact that the two of them were playing the Shiny Chariot trading card game, it would be safe to assume that Akko would exaggerate any amount of stress that a children's card game could add.

"So what Diana did just now was bad, then?" Sucy asked.

"Are you seriously asking me that?!" Akko shouted. "Thanks to Diana's Gae Bolg, she was able to destroy my Sealed Giant because it only had three defense! Then, by activating Tricorn's ability and discarding three Moon Tokens from her Token Farm, she was able to bypass Gae Bolg's side effect of leaving her unable to attack this turn and launch a direct attack with both it and her Woodward, bringing me down to my last Shiny Rod Star!"

"Oh, okay. ...So is that bad, or not?"

"Yes, it's bad!"

"Very good for me, though," Diana said with a playful smirk. Akko growled in response while Sucy just rolled her eye. "Don't be like that, Akko. You shouldn't have assumed that forcing myself to hide my admiration of Shiny Chariot for ten years would dull my skills at the game. Because of that, you're down to one Star, no monsters to defend yourself, and only one card in your hand. It's over! You're going to be utterly defeated in front of everyone, and there's nothing you can do about it!"

"Speaking on behalf of 'everyone,' can you two hurry the hell up?!" Amanda shouted from the table in the cafeteria next to the one Akko and Diana were sitting at. "You said we'd all go into town after you two dueled each other, and that was an hour ago!"

"I'm just as surprised as you are; these duels usually take longer than that." Amanda then proceeded to bang her head against the table. Judging by the expressions on Sucy, Lotte, Constanze, Hannah, Barbara, and even Jasminka's faces, it was safe to say that the card game was trying their patience, as well.

"It's all going to be over soon, though!" Akko shouted. "I'm not giving up! I'll never lose as long as I have my believing heart of the cards!" With that said, Akko drew a card from the top of her deck, an action done with such speed and precision that it looked like an arc of light was formed in the air. Then, after looking at the card, a massive grin appeared on her face.

"Did you draw a good card, Akko?" Lotte asked, immediately followed by Constanze giving a groan as if to say "Please don't encourage this."

"The best! I discard seven Star Tokens from my Token Farm to play Shoot the Moon!" Akko slammed the card she drew down on the table, one bearing a picture of Shiny Chariot firing a blast from her Shiny Arc and leaving a star-shaped crater on the moon.

"Shoot the Moon? I've never heard of that card, before!" Diana shouted.

"Of course you haven't. This card's from the revival series that just started a few months ago. You might have not lost any of your skill over the last ten years, but I held onto something, too: my booster pack subscription!" Diana appeared shocked by the statement, and as far as Akko was concerned, so was everyone else.

"With Shoot the Moon, since I have less than four Shiny Rod Stars left, I can reduce the defense of all Moon Mana Monsters on your side of the field to zero until the end of the turn, which both your Tricorn and Woodward are!"

"Oh no!" Diana shouted.

""Oh no,"" everyone else monotoned.

"But that's not all, Diana, my dear! I then get to draw cards equal to one third of the total defense of your Monsters. Tricorn had three defense, and Woodward had nine, so that adds up to twelve, meaning I get to draw four cards!"

"Leave it to Akko to make a big thing out of basic math," Hannah said as Akko drew her cards.

"Maybe next she'll do a one man play on dental hygiene," Barbara added.

"But I'm not done yet!" Akko said, ignoring the comments of Diana's teammates. "Now I'll discard nine Sun Tokens to summon the monster that'll win me the game: Lernaean Hydra!" Akko slammed a new card onto the field, this one depicting a large, reptilian creature with so many heads that they barely all fit into the frame of the card.

"Twelve attack points, twelve defense points…" Diana trailed off as her eyes continued to be things that weren't wholly trustworthy.

"That's not all it has! My Lernaean Hydra gets an additional attack every time I discard a card from my hand. I have four cards, meaning I can not only destroy both of your monsters, but I can wipe out your three remaining Shiny Rod Stars! Lernaean Hydra, attack Tricorn!"

"..." Diana took Tricorn off the field and put it in the graveyard with a frown.

"Now I'll discard my Polaris Fountain to destroy Woodward!" The attack went through and Diana removed her card from the field. "Next I'll discard my Wyvern to attack you, directly!" The attack went through. "I'll discard my British Red Dragon to do it again!" The attack went through. "And now, Diana, I'll discard my Shiny Chariot: Swimsuit Edition to win the duel!"

"I don't think so!" Diana shouted. "I activate the effect of the Pappiliodya in my hand! By discarding it, I can negate an attack that would reduce my Shiny Rod Stars to zero and automatically end the turn!"

"Aw, come on!" Amanda shouted, the looks on the rest of the girls' faces conveying similar anger. "Why is it so hard for you two to end this dumbass game?!"

"The fact that neither of us can give in at this point is just proof of our skill."

"I think you're missing the point, Diana," Sucy said.

"My turn," Diana said, ignoring Sucy's comment.

"Heh heh heh heh," Akko chuckled in a manner that wasn't at all sensible. "Draw your last pathetic card so I can end this, Diana."

"My deck has no pathetic cards, Akko. But it does contain…" With a face oozing with confidence, Diana flipped around the card she just drew to reveal a giant, gray-skinned man wearing a lion pelt as a coat, "The Mighty Hercules!"

"What?!" Akko's smirk completely faded and was replaced with a look of utter shock. "Impossible!"

"I think you'll find it to be very possible."

"So… is this a good card, or something?" Sucy asked.

"Not only does Hercules have fifteen attack, three more than Lernaean Hydra's twelve, but when Hercules destroys a monster, by discarding all of my Star Tokens, I can roll a seven-sided die, and if the result is the same as the difference between their attack and defense, I can automatically destroy one of my opponent's Shiny Rod Stars."

"So that means-"

"If Diana rolls a three, this game is finally fucking over!" Amanda cheered, the rest of the girls quickly joining in.

Nonononononononononono NO! Akko screamed inside her head. I don't have any cards in my hand or graveyard that can help me (whose neck do you have to sting with a Cupid Bee for a Pappiliodya around here?), so I can't defend myself against the attack! Plus, knowing Diana and her luck, she's not going to have any trouble rolling that three, so once Lernaean Hydra's destroyed, I'm done for!

I have to distract her! I have to throw her off her game!

"I attack Lernaean Hydra with The Mighty Hercules," Diana said.

Something!

"And now I discard all of my Star Tokens to activate my monster's ability."

Anything!

"It's time to end this duel, once and for-"

"DIANA!" Acting purely on instinct, Akko jumped out of her chair, flew across the table, and tackled Diana to the ground, kissing her the second their bodies made contact. Absolutely no one looked surprised by this.

The things my brain can do when I feel like having it do things, Akko told herself as she pulled away from Diana. "How do you like that, Diana?"

"I like it a lot, actually," Diana said.

"Well, I have been practicing with these guides I found online and you're not talking about the kiss, are you?" Diana simply pointed to her left and directed Akko's attention to what needed to be seen.

Somehow, in the midst of the confusion, Diana had thrown her die, and it landed perfectly on a three.

"WE'RE FREE!" Amanda shouted at the sight of the result. Lotte, Constanze, and Jasminka joined in the cheering while Sucy just smiled and Hannah and Barbara held each other as they cried tears of joy.

"I want a rematch!" Akko said.

"You're on," Diana said, leaning up to kiss Akko, herself.

"Are you serious?!"

I know I'm kinda cheating on this one, but day one is stars slash astrology, and I didn't really feel like being the 100th person to have the two just make out under the stars (not that there's anything wrong with that, just felt like doing something different).

Also, if you don't quite get what sort of mythology Akko's acting out, she's a Cancer, so look up the mythology associated with that.