Sarada's Contempt
"Papa! No! You can't leave again!" the little girl's voice rang out as husband and wife began to share goodbyes near the front door of the home. "Please!" Her little legs picked up faster than ever and the girl's mother was shoved out of the way as the couple's young daughter dove onto her father, clinging to his cloak for dear life. "Please please please don't go again," the child's voice began trembling, suggesting the oncoming of tears. The young girl's father stood stunned momentarily, surprised from the sudden outburst and pleading from his young daughter.
Earlier that day...
It was early afternoon in the bustling village of Konoha, as Sasuke Uchiha had returned home from a very long meeting he had been summoned to by the village's Hokage early that morning. He was uncomfortable about the prospect of coming home, as he was going to be sullenly announcing to his family that he was leaving them yet again. The current Hokage, had asked a large favor of Sasuke that required attending a prolonged mission, his protection of the younger genin attending the mission was needed. The 7th Hokage, Naruto Uzumaki, had informed Sasuke that he trusted nobody more than him to make sure all shinobi in the mission were safe and to make it a success. It took a lot of poking and prodding and coaxing his best friend, but Sasuke finally accepted in defeat, knowing that even though Naruto was not only his best friend but like a brother to him, he couldn't really deny an order from the Hokage.
It was already bad enough that Sasuke was frequently gone from home; not around as often as a father and a husband should be, but in truth, even after all these years, Sasuke was still on his journey of redemption, still seeking it from wherever he could, learning as many things as he could about the shinobi world so no further incidents would happen in the future like the battle with Madara and Kaguya had all of those years ago. He had an amazingly wonderful little girl named Sarada Uchiha, and a beautiful, loving and devoted wife. They were his family and he'd do all he could to protect them, even if that meant prolonged trips away from home, but this trip in particular could take a few weeks, according to Naruto. That was all well, good and fine, but how was he going to break it to his family that he was going to be leaving again, and this time gone for at least three weeks?
Sasuke arrived home, and walked wearily inside, even though he wasn't exactly tired physically, he felt mentally drained. He was dreading the news he was about to tell his family because he knew how they'd take it. Sarada would be upset. Sakura would act like it was no big deal, but he could always see that truth in her eyes. Sasuke hung his long, black coat up by the front door on the coat rack, slipped off his sandals, removed his sword, and took in a breath. He could smell lunch cooking from the kitchen, and could hear the voices of his little girl and his wife chatting about something or other, he wasn't sure about what exactly.
The Uchiha walked into the kitchen, and Sarada's small, black head inclined his way as he entered. Her large, onyx eyes, a perfect mixture of his own color and Sakura's lovely shape framed by a set of glasses, widened all the more. Her jet black hair was just as sleek as her mother's, but the same shade of his own. "Papa!" She squealed as the bespectacled girl lept up from her seat and ran to her father. Sasuke crouched down and opened his arms to his daughter where she threw herself into him and hugged him warmly.
"Mama and I are just about finished preparing lunch!" the little girl announced proudly as she pulled back from her father. Sasuke gave her a small smile and rubbed the top of dark locks. "I hope you're hungry. We've spent a long time over the stove for you," Sarada told him sternly adjusting the glasses on her face, and Sasuke had to hold back a snicker at his child's attempts to sound just like her mother. He stood up tall, walked up to his wife, whom was busy at the stove, and snaked an arm around her waist, leaning his head over her shoulder to peer down into the pots and pants sitting on the stove.
"Rice balls and tomatoes for me huh?" he teased, trying to sneak a hand out as though to steal a bite, which Sakura gave a sharp slap. "Tch!"
"Hey! It's not done yet so hands off! You'll eat when the rest of us do," she told him playfully as he pulled back his, bandaged, prosthetic hand. At least it was that one she smacked. The pink haired woman turned around and put her arms up around her husband's shoulders and stood on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek. "Welcome home. How was your meeting with Naruto and the others?"
Sasuke sighed as he dropped his arms at his sides and turned away from Sakura, not wanting to relay the news to his family, but honestly having no choice. He pulled out a chair and sat down heavily into it, running his hands through his black, still somewhat spiked hair. "Well, how should I put this...," the Uchiha began nervously. Sarada had both eyes planted sharply onto her father, and he almost winced at the intensity of her unwavering gaze. It was the same look Sakura would give him when he knew he was in trouble. In truth, he'd never openly admit it, but his wife and his daughter scared the hell out of him sometimes. Sakura turned to face him now, but with a softer expression in her seafoam green eyes. "The Hokage wants me to attend an A-rank mission, but it's quite a ways away from here. It's just outside of the Land of Iron. There are several genin that are going to be tagging along for this mission, and Naruto wants me to go."
"I see," Sakura replied quietly. "So how long does he expect you to be gone?"
Sasuke rubbed his forehead with his fingertips, appearing almost exhausted. "He said it's probably going to be at least three weeks, though we're honestly not sure. It depends on the success of the mission."
"When will you be leaving?" Sakura questioned casually, as though this were just a normal, everyday conversation, and Saskue quickly found that he hated this. This was becoming more mainstream than he cared for it to become, but what other choice did he have? It was Hokage's orders, and so he really had no right to decline.
"I'll be heading out after lunch. I'm supposed to meet with Naruto and the other shinobi in about an hour who are attending the mission to discuss details and then we'll be leaving from there," he explained, unable to look at either his wife, or his daughter. There was a short, sharp cry and Sasuke's head shot up as he found himself face to face with a furious looking 6 year old.
"This is not fair!" came Sarada's voice angrily from across the table. "Papa, why do you always have to leave!" the little Uchiha girl demanded to know.
"Sarada," Sasuke began with a sigh, his voice sounding tired. "Uncle Naruto wants me to go along because he said I can help take care of the younger ninja. You know, you're going to be graduating from the academy someday too and when you do, you'll become a genin who will go on missions just like this, and maybe we'll even get to go on one together," he tried to lighten the mood, but Sarada's face grew darker and her arms folded hard against her chest, bottom lip slightly poking out in a pout. So reminiscent of her mother... Sasuke thought as he watched his daughter.
"You're always gone! You're never home! And now Uncle Naruto is making you leave again when you just got back!" Sarada unfolded her arms and slammed her small fists down in the kitchen table, startling but Sasuke and Sakura. Sarada had a temper just like her mother's, and wasn't afraid to say exactly what was on her mind as a result.
"Sarada, sweetheart," Sakura began, but the young Uchiha girl had jumped up from her seat.
"No! It's not fair! I'm so sick of you always being gone, Papa!" This child didn't miss a beat. "I always have to see Mama cry when you're gone and it's because she misses you! And I always miss you too! You don't care about us! If you did, you wouldn't always be gone and make Mama cry! I...I... I HATE YOU!" the little girl stammered, yelling as she turned sharply on her heel and rushed out of the kitchen. Sasuke and Sakura could hear the soft 'pat pat pat' of her running footsteps running down the hallway, stop as they approached her room and then the door slammed hard behind her.
"SARADA!" Sakura called for her daughter beginning to make her way out of the kitchen as well and go after her, but Sasuke reached a hand out and grabbed Sakura's wrist stopping his wife in her place.
"Just let her be, Sakura" he told her quietly, his one visable, onyx eye not hidden under his black locks of hair, not looking at her, but staring down at the wooden table underneath him. "She's right. I am always gone." Sasuke took a shuddering breath and rubbed his face with his hands, trying to ignore the tightening sensation in his throat. "I'm... a terrible father and husband."
Sakura turned toward him as he released his grip on her wrist and Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose. "Sasuke, no. You're not a terrible father or a terrible husband. If you were, then you wouldn't do the things you do for us and to take care of us. You were able to give us a great home and always able to have food in our stomachs because of the missions and the trips and jobs you do," she tried to encourage him, but Sasuke snorted at her derisively.
"Sakura, your income from the hospital as a medical nin is more than sufficient. Sarada is right. I'm gone from home far too much," he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Maybe I should tell Naruto that I can't go on this mission," began, but was interrupted by his pink haired wife.
"Sasuke Uchiha, don't you dare say you're going to abort a mission. Especially one issued by the Hokage, who is also your best friend! He is counting on you! Those genin are counting on you to help aid them and keep them safe. Sarada and I will be fine for a few weeks on our own," Sakura told him sternly, placing both hands on her hips.
"After hearing what my own daughter just had to say to me, you think I can just so readily leave? You cry while I'm gone? She hates me? She thinks I don't care about either of you because I'm gone so much?" Sasuke turned his onyx eye to his wife and stared back just as hard. "You two are all I have, and all I care about, but...," Sasuke's voice grew tight and he closed his eyes, attempting to ignore the tingling sensation prickling at the backs of his eyelids.
"Sasuke," Sakura spoke her husband's name with such an overwhelming gentleness that if Sasuke had been standing, he would have went to his knees, as they were starting to shake underneath the table. The pink haired kunoichi pulled up a chair and sat down close to him. She reached a hand out to cup his face tenderly, and she brushed back the hair covering his Rinnegan eye. "Look at me," she demanded tenderly, and he obliged, not in the mood to argue. He opened both of his mismatched eyes and looked into his wife's gaze so filled with understanding and love. "I know how you feel. I know how you still struggle with remorse. I know you think that you still need to keep redeeming yourself, but trust me. You already have. You were just a kid yourself. You went through a dark period in your life. You were only 17 years old, and we got you back. The things you did back then have no meaning now. It's over and it's been long since gone from my mind."
Sasuke reached up to hold onto his wife's wrist. "But it's not gone from mine, Sakura. How can I ever forgive myself for doing what I did to you? I was so far gone... I tried to kill you, and you still forgave me. You and Naruto both. You gave me your whole life, and for what reason? Tell me exactly what I did to deserve that?" He snapped, trying to get angry instead of being taken down by his own overwhelmingly powerful remorse. "You gave me a child that I'm undeserving of being a father to. I leave as often as I can because I try and do as many things as I can to make up for all the pain I have caused so many people."
"How can you honestly say that you don't deserve us?" Sakura asked him, staring earnestly into his eyes. "If you didn't deserve us, then do you think you would even have us? Sasuke... every since you came home, you've given me nothing but happiness. You gave me your life. You married me, and became my husband. You chose me to be your wife. You could have chosen Ino or even that Karin, but you didn't. It was me. You came back for me. You came home for me. You gave me the most beautiful gift of all, and that's Sarada. I would never ever change a moment of anything that happened in our lives. Not ever, because it brought us to this point, and I'm grateful for that," she didn't let go of his face.
Sasuke's bottom lip trembled, and Sakura placed her thumb against it, giving him an affectionate, warm smile. "I guess I've gotten soft in my old age," he joked as he lowered his head and rubbed at his burning eyes with his wrist. "I'm sorry, Sakura." was all he could manage to say. There was so much more he wanted to say, but the Uchiha was worried that if he did, he might burst into tears and that's something he would never want to do again in front of Sakura, and something he'd never want his daughter to see either. They saw him as the strong, powerful head of the house who protected his family. Not some weak-minded man burned by his emotions.
"Now!" Sakura stated enthusiastically, letting go of her husband's face and clapping her hands together. "I'll pack up your lunch for you, since you've just wasted quite a lot of time," she chuckled at him. "You have to meet back with Naruto and the others soon. This mission is extremely important and he needs you on it. You can write to us while you're gone and let us know how everything is going." Sakura put on a cheerful smile, but Sasuke could see right through it. He knew his wife was heartbroken at the prospect of him leaving yet again, no matter how brave of a face she put on, no matter how much she pretended to be alright.
"Yeah," Sasuke sighed and stood up, smoothing out his long, white button up shirt. "Maybe I should go and tell Sarada goodbye before going," he inclined his head toward the doorway of the kitchen that led to the hall.
"I think that would be a good idea," Sakura replied with a nod as she began preparing to pack her husband's meal for traveling. Sakura turned her face back towards the food, but Sasuke did not mistake the sound of her sniffling, and he knew she'd turn her face so he wouldn't see her cry.
Sasuke wondered if he should go to her first, but shook his head, letting her have her moment. He brushed his hair back over his Rinnegan eye, knowing how unnerving it was for people to look at, especially his daughter, and walked out of the kitchen and down the hallway. He stopped outside of Sarada's room and listened quietly. Not a sound was coming from inside. He raised his fist and knocked twice. "Sarada?" he called out for his daughter, but there was no response. Sasuke sighed and rested his forehead against the door. "I'm just letting you know I'm leaving now. Papa is sorry, Sarada. You know I care very deeply for both you and your mother very much. I'll bring you home a surprise when I get back," he added, hoping that maybe that would get his little girl's attention, but still not a sound came from the room. Sasuke closed both of his eyes painfully and then lifted his head from the door, turned and walked back down the hall, his shoulders slumped in defeat.
"I guess I won't be saying goodbye to Sarada," Sasuke sighed as Sakura handed him his packed lunch, eyes dry now, but tear tracks clearly visable on her face. He wasn't really hungry anymore anyway. He'd lost his appetite after all that had just happened. "You'll tell her goodbye for me, right?"
"Of course I will, Sasuke," Sakura told him as the two walked into the living room.
"You know if I had my way about this, I wouldn't be leaving at all," he told his wife as Sakura reached up to the coat rack and retrieved Sasuke's long, black coat. He slung it over his shoulders and buttoned up the collar around his neck. He reached down where he'd sat his sword and picked it up, re-sheating it against his back, the long back of his coat hiding it from view.
Sakura smiled up sadly at her husband. "I know you wouldn't," she told him softly. "But this is for Naruto more than anything, and he is the Hokage, but not only that he's your best friend, so he needs you too, just as much as us and sometimes more. So that's one of those instances. Just keep yourself focused and busy and these next few weeks will fly by!" Sakura attempted to sound happy, but Sasuke could not mistake the sparkle of tears beginning to show in her eyes again, and it made him feel worse.
"Sakura, please don't do that," he sighed and poked his wife gently in the forehead, his fingertips touching just in between the perfect, purple diamond that still sat on her forehead, and he couldn't help but feel a sense of pride over that accomplishment his wife had achieved back then during that battle against Madara. "You're right. Maybe we'll even be back before three weeks. We could end up completing the mission way ahead of time. We used to do that all of the time when we were kids after all," he added.
"Yes! We did! Those were the days, huh?" Sakura replied, faking another smile, her voice trembling. Sasuke reached his hands out to place them both on Sakura's shoulders.
"So please, don't," he told her and brought his hands to her face, using his thumbs to wipe away the tears that had gathered in the corners of her seafoam green eyes. "I'll be back before you know it."
Neither Sasuke nor Sakura noticed the small form that had been standing in the doorway leading from the kitchen to the living room. She had been hiding just behind the wall. Out of nowhere, there was a cry. Sasuke and Sakura turned toward the doorway to see a blur of red, orange and black rushing their way.
"Papa! No! You can't leave again!" the little girl's voice rang out as Sasuke Uchiha and Sakura Uchiha had been sharing their goodbyes near the front door of the Uchiha home. "Please!" Her little legs picked up faster than ever and Sakura was shoved out of the way as their young daughter, Sarada, dove onto her father, clinging to his coat for dear life. "Please, please, please don't go again," the child's voice began trembling, suggesting the oncoming of tears. Sasuke stood, completely stunned momentarily, surprised from the sudden outburst and pleading from his young daughter.
Earlier, Sarada had been furious with him, screaming at him and telling him she hated him. No parent ever wants to hear those words from their child, and Sasuke could remember the times he'd told his father he hated him too, but for entirely different reasons. He absentmindedly wondered now if he had hurt his father with those same words, because those words had felt like a knife piercing him straight through his heart. "So you're not mad at me anymore?" Sasuke inquired softly as Sarada clung to him, her small hand clutching hard at his coat, her entire little body trembling hard. Sasuke cupped the back of his daughter's head with his hand and pulled her in closer.
Sarada buried her face, glasses and all, into Sasuke's arm and began to sob. "I don't hate you, Papa. I was just mad. I just don't want you to go. We just want you to be home and stay here with us. Me and Mama and it's because we love you so much, so please, please don't leave us again!" her voice jarred by her crying, but it wasn't hard to mistake her words, and Sasuke drew his brow in, clenching his teeth together and fought against the lump rising in his throat. Sakura reached her hand out to hold the side of Sasuke's face, while she placed the other hand on top of her daughter's head, attempting to comfort the turmoil both her husband and child were facing.
"Sarada," Sakura began gently. "Papa has to leave for just a little while because it's very important, but I promise you, and so does he, that he will be back. He always comes home, because his home is wherever we are. So if he goes far away, he will always be back to be with us, okay?"
"I just always miss you so much when you're gone," Sarada sniffled, raising her tear streaked face from her father's arm to look up at her father who's head was now turned the other way. "I know you'll be back, but it just takes too long." Sasuke's shoulders trembled, and his throat tightened, and he was grateful Sakura's hand was on his face to catch the few tears that had managed to escape out of his eyes before Sarada could see them.
"I know, Sarada," Sasuke replied after regaining his composure. "But just like your mother said, I will always come back home, because my home is where you two are." He turned to look down at his daughter now and give her a small smile. "I promise you, I will be back as soon as I can, and when I get home, I'll stay for a really long time. I'll even tell Uncle Naruto I need a vacation from missions so I don't have to leave again. How does that sound?"
Sarada smiled weakly up at her father and nodded her head. "I'm sorry I said I hate you, Papa. I really don't hate you. You're the best Papa in the whole world. You really do take good care of me and Mama. It's okay. I was just mad," she wiped at her face. "We'll be okay."
Sasuke was shocked into silence by his daughter's words once more, but he was so grateful for them, that the crack in his heart closed up just a little bit more. He tenderly poked his little girl in the forehead, just like Itachi used to do for him, and wondered momentarily if his older brother was watching them from somewhere, and what he'd think if he saw Sarada and saw that he carried on his brother's gesture of affection to his own family now. He smiled genuinely. "I'll see you soon." He stood up and Sakura wrapped her arms tightly around her husband, to which he comfortably returned the gesture. "I'll be home soon," he breathed into his wife's ear, before the two shared a goodbye kiss that made Sarada blush and smile. "Wait for me?"
"We always do," Sakura replied with a watery grin, and she placed her hands on the sides of Sasuke's face to give him one more kiss. "Be careful out there."
"I always do," Sasuke responded and he pulled out of his wife's embrace. Sakura stepped back to stand beside Sarada. Sasuke could feel their eyes on him, as they watched their favorite person walk out of the house and shut the door behind him. He stood for a moment at his door, listening to their voices.
"Mama?" he heard Sarada's voice speak up. "Don't tell Papa this, but I saw him crying... I didn't mean to make him cry. I feel really bad now."
So she did see... They're never gonna let me live that down...
"Sarada," Sasuke heard Sakura's voice so motherly and so knowing. "He wasn't crying because you made him. It's just because he loves you so much."
"Really?" Sarada questioned, and Sasuke felt his heart clench in his chest.
"Really," Sakura affirmed. "Now, let's go have some lunch. You must be hungry."
Sasuke listened as the voices of his two girls faded off and he stepped away from his home, beginning his walk in the direction of the Hokage manor, hoping that this would be the last time for awhile that he would have to go. The images of his wife and his daughter were forever carved into his eyes, into his heart. They were his home, and he would be home again soon.
Author's Note:
This was my very first attempt at writing a story of the Uchiha family. I'd like to think that before Sarada became so silent and cold, she was once a very happy child when her Papa was around, and reacted like a lot of kids would to their parents always leaving. For me, growing up, my dad was never home. He was always gone as he worked four hours away and so he'd stay there for weeks on end and never come home. I used to get the same way like Sarada did, but over time, my feelings began changing and began getting angry and cold and acting uncaring, etc... so I'd like to think this could be in the early stages of that change happening to Sarada. We don't know much about her personality at all yet, so I tried to couple of Sakura's temper on her rather than Sasuke's cool demeanor. As for Sasuke, over the years people change in different ways. I like to imagine Sasuke still suffers that remorse, etc... hence why I wrote him this way. It's hard to stay true to a character when you have no idea how much they may have changed over the course of the years. In any case, I may write more Uchiha family stories in the future. We shall see!