Title: C'est La Vie
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Adam Burton. (That's right, Max--I know your TRUE name!)
A/N: After rewatching WotSQ the other day, I found I still had some G&E fic still in me. It's kind of a shame Velma was a one-off character. She was pretty darn cool.
"--And den we banished him to the Underworld for de rest of eternity!" Grim finished merrily, waving his teacup around for emphasis.
Velma chucked heartily. "What a delightful story! It's been so nice getting to catch up with you, Grim," she sighed, cradling her own cup of soylent green tea.
The reaper couldn't agree more. In the course of his long, wearisome existence, Velma was perhaps the sole being he would honestly consider a true friend. Sure, she'd plotted to destroy him for countless millennia, but what friendship didn't have its rough patches?
"It's been so boring since I took over the world," she continued wistfully. "Now it's all politics and torturing dissenters, day in and day out... I try to delegate, but if you want a dystopian matriarchy run right, you have to do it yourself."
"You just can't find good minions dese days," Grim lamented. "No pride in spreadin' mass destruction an' chaos. It's shameful."
"Mass destruction? Hah! I'd settle for mild disorder from the goons I've got!"
"Ah, well... What can ya do?"
"True."
"So anything else new wit' you?"
"Not much. Still returning wedding presents."
"Oh, yeah... Sorry tings didn't work out with you and Jeff."
"It's okay. He was kind of a sycophant, anyway."
"Ya think?" Grim asked, spreading the sarcasm thicker than double-chocolate frosting.
"Sometimes, it seems like we were just together because we're both sentient giant spiders." Velma sipped her tea daintily. "It was just convenient scripting."
'Seems kind of cheap t' me."
"Well, there were a lot of different arcs going on. You can't expect them all to be perfect."
"I suppose."
"Anything new with you, Grim?"
"Er... Actually, I came here to do more than just catch up," Grim admitted. "See, Mandy's plottin' to wrest control of the world from you. And I'm gonna hafta help her, 'cause she's got me under contract. So I thought I'd warn you."
"That is so sweet of you!" she gushed.
"Oh... y'know... It was nothin'."
"Is she raising an army of her own or is she just going to confront me for the throne?" Velma asked off-handedly.
"Don't know yet. I'd lean towards de second one, though. You don't seem worried. She's gonna win... Mandy always wins."
"C'est la vie. The only fun part is taking it in the first place. She'll learn that soon enough."
"Guess so. What are you gonna do next, then?"
"Well, my parents are finally off my case about ruling the world... I was thinking about taking up scrapbooking."
"Sounds fun," he said mildly, then took a swig of tea. "I guess I'm gonna be second-in-command in de new world order. It might be kinda fun."
"Maybe I'll start an underground resistance movement. You could be a double agent!"
"I've always wanted to be one of dose!"
Velma grinned and held out her teacup. "Here's to world domination!"
"World domination!"
Porcelain clinked, mingling with their maniacal laughter.
Um, that nifty little review button down there? Not just there for decoration... Hint, hint.