Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to SquareEnix.
Mystic: Viva la Reefie is hosting their 2009 spring challenge and I decided to participate. Contests are great for getting those juices flowing, yes? The requirements are to incorporate three quotes from a selective list into a humorous oneshot that takes place one year after Deepground. Since my previous contest entries were angst-fests, I figured this would be a nice change of pace. Enjoy!
Quotes used:
"Sexist! Sexist!" Advent Children
"It's good to be the king." Mel Brooks
"So, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb." Spaceballs
Of course, I threw in an extra special one just for the lulz. Guess which one. Here's a hint. Mmmm... Robert Downey Jr as Tony Stark. ^ ^
They sat by the pond outside of Old Midgar, back to back, and under the trees. This was their new routine; a quiet moment alone in nature, far away from paperwork and boring meetings. He could rest from the role as Commissioner and she could escape the title of White Rose -- if only for fifteen minutes.
She didn't have to spy or gather information and he didn't have to deal with diplomacy or ambassadors from her country. He could escape the hum of computers in his office while she simply wanted fresh air and bright sunshine. This habit of theirs came right after lunch, when Yuffie would drag Reeve by his collar for a mini-date by the water. Reeve never protested and the results of her actions were positive; the lowered blood pressure and slight tan did wonders for his health.
"It's good to be the king," she finally said. "You get to make all the rules, lots of lackeys to do your bidding, and all the materia in the world is yours." Yuffie sighed in contentment. "Oh, yeah. I could so get into that."
His hand reached back to clasp around hers. "You're not a man, Yuffie." A harsh truth, but a truth Reeve preferred. No heterosexual male could wear her short-shorts with such dignity. Nor would he like to witness any trying. "You'd make a good queen though."
She sighed. "You take the fun out of everything, Reeve." His fingers tightened. "Whatever happened to that fun-loving guy behind Cait?"
"He's around, I'm sure," he answered. "Probably wondering where that hyperactive ninja went with his balls ... of materia."
Snort. "I can run both Wutai and WRO." He laughed, only out of good nature, but it still earned him a whack to his arm. This was Yuffie however, and his arm grew immune to her usual whacks. "I'll make you my lackey!" she threatened. "Just for that! No, wait." She leapt up and hugged his shoulders, pressing her chest into his back and whispering into his ear. "You can be my boy toy."
His chuckle was low, fueled by tension of the sexual kind. "I'm far too old to be a boy toy."
"Hot man slave?"
"I only wish to serve."
She squealed in delight. "It'll be perfect! You'll see." Her mind began to plot the perfect world domination plan. "After I defeat all the evil monsters and Sephy-kin look-a-likes, I'll take my rightful place on Wutai's throne. I'll make you wear a teeny-tiny loincloth that barely covers your --"
"Yuffie," he interrupted. "No one would take me serious in a loincloth."
The image wasn't an ideal one. He was famous for his public appearances and engineering breakthroughs, a businessman to his very core, with little time for any fun. Like sex. Or women. Or any means to hopefully combine the two. Then he hired Yuffie and the problem solved itself.
Yuffie rambled on, plopping into his lap, and not particularly caring that her actions were inappropriate for both a princess and a kick-ass spy. "They wouldn't have to take you serious, Reeve. Just me because I'm the queen. You're just around to keep the queen very, very happy."
"You'd make me your concubine?"
"Yeppers! The sexiest male concubine ever."
"You're an evil, evil little girl, Yuffie."
She tweaked his nose. "So, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb."
He pinched her cheek, the one on her face because his hands usually had little control when it came to her bottom half. His other hand was supposed to support him so he sat straight, but alas, it was stroking Yuffie's upper thigh, close to the hem of her shorts, satisfied with the smooth skin beneath. "You stole something of mine, didn't you?"
Her eyes shifted. "No ..."
The fingers on her thigh twitched a little higher. "Yuffie, it's not nice to lie to your boss." Higher still and she began to blush. "Both the crime and the lie deserves dire punishment."
The blush remained, even as she toyed with his tie, wrapping it around her hand to pull him into a kiss. "You can't punish a girl, Reeve. That goes against your gentleman nature."
"Sexist, sexist," he teased. "I thought you demanded equal treatment."
"But you always open doors for me."
"That's being polite."
They kissed again; a sweet soft kiss between girl and boy, despite Reeve being far past his boyhood years. At a young age of twenty, Yuffie could still be considered a girl and didn't protest when her boss called her such. He said the word with jest, usually before a passion-driven embrace on his desk that ended with sweaty skin and damp hair. She'd call him a dirty old man afterward, playfully accusing him of seducing the innocent. This relationship they shared had yet to be defined, but that didn't stop either of them from enjoying what moments they captured.
He pulled her down on the grass, happy to be secluded, and even happier that she allowed him to do so. He settled comfortably between her legs, trailing a tongue along her collarbone in a simple, sensual gesture. "What did you steal, Yuffie?" he whispered. "I still remember how to torture rebels."
"You can't make me talk," she moaned, running a hand through his hair. "It wasn't even something important."
"Ah, so you did steal from me." He nipped at her jugular. "It wouldn't happen to be what was lying on my desk this morning, would it?"
Yuffie chuckled. "The big stack of papers marked 'Important Speech'?" She kissed him hard before he could answer, delaying any sort of response other than desire. His method of torture involved pressing her further down on the grass, letting it prick onto their skin, and leaving noticeable marks that warranted questions from others later. "I might know something about that," she said, ignoring irony.
"That speech is needed, Yuffie." His voice was low, dangerous. His hands even more so. One skimmed her waist and traveled up her shirt, cupping a breast to make her temporarily forget where she was. "Your commissioner demands it back."
"Good, you've admitted that you're mine. Good man slave; you're properly trained."
His free hand popped the button to her shorts. "Give the speech back, Yuffie."
"I'm rather occupied at the moment, mister." A zipper came undone; his, because her hands were deft and eager to make full use of what time they had. "Talk to me after my lunch break and I might hand it over."
A dark laugh rumbled against her throat. Out by the quiet pond and secluded by shrubbery, the pair made excellent use of the half hour break. No one knew of this office affair they shared, whether it happened inside on a bed or outside among nature. He enjoyed being her older -- secret -- lover; kissing her open palm in an empty hallway, or passing risque notes under the table during a meeting.
It was their secret and it was enough.
And one year after Deepground, it was still strong.
xxx
Minutes before the scheduled press conference, Reeve and Yuffie entered headquarters. They were flushed in the face, evidence of a romantic tryst, but quickly blamed on the unusual warm weather. Reporters swarmed them like they always did, waiting on the promised words of wisdom from the man who vowed to change the world.
He walked to the microphone, composed and smiling, and faced the crowd.
"Ladies and gentleman," he began, "they say the perfect weapon is one you never have to fire. As your Commissioner and fellow witness to the Jenova War, Bahamut's SIN attack, and the events of Deepground, I respectfully disagree."
Yuffie smiled.
Mystic: Plot? What plot? I just wrote this for fun, y'all. Good luck to my fellow competitors.