Disclaimer: Anything you recognize isn't mine.

A/N: Written for Mitten's Dialogue Competition over at the HPFC Forum. The story had to be written entirely in dialogue, and I was given the prompts, "What's today's date?", "wallpaper", and "roses", along with the pairing DennisGabrielle. Feedback would be much appreciated!

Humdrum

"Gab, what's today's date?"

"Ze fourteenth."

"Okay... so did you Floo the owner of that company that was selling those defunct cauldrons for a comment yet?"

"Yes – 'e says zat 'e eez very sorry for ze trouble. If 'e 'ad known zat 'is errors would cause ze most junior reporters of ze Daily Prophet to 'ave to write ze most boring articles about 'im, 'e would not 'ave done eet."

"Oi! This is important news we're working on here! I mean, it may not be front page stuff, but – "

"No, eet eez not – zat would be Rita Skeeter's article about 'Arry Potter's secret bald spot..."

"I'll have you know that that bald spot was key to defeating You-Know-Who –"

"Shut up, Dennis! And say 'is name, for Merlin's sake – 'e eez dead, yes? So zere eez no longer any reason to fear 'im."

"Shut up, and say something? I'm torn…"

"Evidently not."

"…"

"…"

"Oh… hahaha – that was funny, Gabrielle!"

"I try, you know."

"Yeah, you try, really hard… I can tell from the way you're reading that magazine instead of calling Mr. Lawrence for a comment…"

"Dennis, if you want eet done so badly, why do you not just call 'im yourself?"

"Why does your accent only thicken when you're annoyed with me?"

"Eet does not!"

"Yes, it does… that's the only time you ever say my name like 'Denise', instead of just saying 'Dennis'… You definitely do! Don't shake your head at me! I can tell by the way you're smiling!"

"You are avoiding ze question, Denise…"

"Aw, come on, that was just uncalled for…"

"… still avoiding ze question…"

"I am not. The answer is, you're just better at getting people to talk for the news than I am."

"From ze male gender, maybe."

"Exactly."

"So you are exploiting me to ze world so zat you can get a quote for an article?"

"… No? You're just better at calling for comments than I am..."

"You are ze strangest boyfriend I 'ave ever 'ad."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"I 'ave not decided yet."

"Well, you will let me know when you do, won't you?"

"Per'aps."

"…"

"…"

"If you really don't want to Floo – which I'm getting from the way you're still sitting there, by the way – then I suppose I will…"

"Do we 'ave to write zis article, Denise? Eet eez so stupid…"

"For the last time, it's Dennis – I know you're doing it on purpose! - and yes, we do. Come on, Gabrielle. I know it's a bit boring now, but we have to work our way up. Someday, it's just going to be us, covering the very biggest news stories, real ones, not the ones like Rita Skeeter makes up. We aren't going to twist things like she does, either."

"…"

"…"

"Zis really 'as always been your dream, 'asn't eet?"

"Yeah. Ever since Colin and I were little… I've always wanted to work in an office like this…"

"Even wiz zis ugly wallpaper?"

"It's not that bad..."

"Eet eez pretty bad. Multicolored roses... I 'ave never seen such zings."

"..."

"Are you listening to me?"

"Well, I was just thinking... Gabrielle?"

"Yes?"

"What was your childhood dream? Like where would you be right now, if you could be anywhere in the world?"

"…"

"Well, never mind, you don't have to answer. What time is it, anyway?"

"… Am I your own personal calendar or somezing? Look at ze clock!"

"Fine... damn, almost four. We need that comment soon then. I'll do it, Gab – I had no idea you really didn't want to…"

"No, do not worry. Zere is no need…"

"We have to write the article, Gabrielle. It's what we were assigned..."

"Yes, I understand zat. Eet eez just zat I already called 'im, when you were een ze bazroom earlier… Here eet eez…"

"Gabrielle!"

"Denise!"

"I'm officially ignoring you."

"'Onestly, you are ze strangest boyfriend…"

"How is that being a strange boyfriend?"

"Eet would not be, if we were boz seven. But I zought you were not talking to me?"

"I'm not."

"If you say so…"

"…"

"You know, for what you asked earlier? If I could be anywhere, I would be… here. Wiz you, writing some stupid articles…"

"… Do you… Do you... Really?"

"… I would probably redecorate, zough, because I really cannot take ze wallpaper…"

"… Gabrielle, I…"

"Dennis?"

"… I kind of… oh, ha! Ha, ha, ha! I knew you could say my name correctly!"

"I mean, Denise..."

"And you say I'm immature?"

"Denise, Denise, Denise..."

"Shut up."

"..."

"You know, we're sort of shit at actually just saying, 'I love you', aren't we?"

"What are you talking about? I zought zat we expressed ourselves rather well."

"Yeah, if 'I hate the wallpaper' and 'Stop saying my name wrong' are code words..."

"I was under ze impression zat zey were."