Author's Note:
Hello all! This is the second installment of my Learning to Love Freely series, so if you're just stumbling across this, be sure to check out Confessions first: s/12664948/1/Confessions. If you're already familiar with the first part, then I'm glad to see that you're still following the story!
As I said before, I am very new to writing in this fandom, so feedback of all kinds is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!
Tschau,
~lexthemess
"I told you so," Natasha declared none-too-humbly as she and Bruce settled at her kitchen table for their weekly lunch.
"Yes, you did," Bruce agreed with a smile, "and thank you."
Natasha waved the statement away with a flick of a dainty hand. "What agreement did you come to?" she asked, nibbling at her baked chicken breast.
After sipping at his tea, Bruce replied, "We had a couple of discussions over the last few days, and our first scene was yesterday. He said that he enjoyed taking care of me but that he wasn't sure about adding it to our sex life. So, for now, Tony, my lover, is to remain separate from Tony, my daddy." Bruce didn't bother trying to hold back his smile when he said that. Daddy. He felt smugly satisfied every time he thought the word in reference to Tony.
"He didn't freak out about it at all?" was the next question.
Bruce shook his head. "No. He was surprisingly calm and took everything in stride. The only time he actually expressed any kind of concern about it was when I started panicking."
Natasha gave a thoughtful hum. "Anything else I should know?"
"There's no reason to commit homicide if that's what you're asking."
Natasha primly tucked into her food then, carefully innocent expression on her face.
Two weeks later, Bruce was busying himself in the lab when he was interrupted. "Dr. Banner," J.A.R.V.I.S said, "Sir has requested that you join him for dinner in the penthouse."
Bruce blinked in surprise, and a glance at the monitor in front of him revealed that it was, indeed, time for dinner. Where had the time gone? He gave a last look at the research he'd been doing. "Thank you, J.A.R.V.I.S. Would you please save this for me?"
"Of course."
Bruce exited the lab and made his way to the penthouse. Since the discussion they'd had a few weeks ago, Tony had been doing things like this more often. The revelation that Bruce liked to be taken care of both in and out of Little space had made Tony a bit more proactive in that area. He'd started cooking dinner for them instead of ordering in, picking out Bruce's outfits, and making sure Bruce slept regularly rather than taking part in binge science. They had only done a few scenes after that first time, but each time had been better than the one before.
When Bruce stepped from the elevator, he was immediately enveloped in the scent of Indian food, and his stomach gave a rumble. He made his way to the kitchen and saw Tony setting food on the table.
Tony glanced up with a smile and moved around the table to press a kiss to Bruce's lips. "Hey," Tony said, wrapping his arms around Bruce.
"Hey. The food smells amazing," Bruce replied, resting his head in the curve of Tony's neck.
"Thanks. Sit down, and let's eat."
That was another thing Tony had started doing: ordering instead of requesting.
Obediently, Bruce took a seat at the table, earning him a pleased smile that made him feel warm. Tony sat beside him, and they dug into their meal. It was delicious, as was becoming usual these days. Bruce remarked as much.
Tony beamed. "Thank you, Brucie!"
Bruce didn't know why he had initially been so surprised that Tony could cook. Food preparation was just chemistry; of course Tony could do it. Tony could do everything.
Bruce and Tony chatted amicably over their food, from the latest Avengers gossip to recent advancements in science and how they could improve upon them. When they finished, Tony waved away Bruce's offer of help with the dishes, instead sending him to pick out a movie for them to watch.
In the living room, Bruce hesitated. He was in a weird headspace now, somewhere between Little and big, and he didn't know which he wanted to be. Eventually, he decided against choosing. He selected Coraline, which was a children's movie but darker than expected for the intended audience, and took off his shoes and socks, staying in the rest of his grown-up clothes, but fetching Cão from the bedroom before curling up on the middle cushion of the couch.
Tony found him like that (and he was still Tony in Bruce's mind right now, not Daddy) and made no comment on it. He just sat beside Bruce, allowing the other man to snuggle into his side, and Bruce gleefully absorbed the heat that was radiating from there. "Comfy, Brucie?" Tony checked. Bruce nodded, and Tony ordered J.A.R.V.I.S. to begin the movie.
Midway through the movie found Bruce chewing lightly on one of Cão's ears, the pressure in his mouth and the soft texture on his tongue soothing him, and staring at the screen with heavily-lidded eyes as Tony ran his fingers through the curls on Bruce's head. Tony knew all the spots that made Bruce purr, and he seemed intent on pressing them all. Bruce was pleasantly sleepy and Little, just enough so that his thoughts were fuzzy and abstract, but not so much that he felt clingy and needy.
He didn't know at what point he dropped completely, but soon, he was in Daddy's lap as they watched the rest of the movie. His big-boy clothes felt itchy and uncomfortable, but he didn't want to bother Daddy. Daddy smiled down at him, and that made Bruce happy. He liked it when Daddy smiled, and he didn't want to make him stop. He could handle itchy clothes as long as Daddy was smiling. Bruce turned back to the movie.
Cão's ear was pulled from Bruce's mouth, and Bruce looked up and saw Daddy looking at him. "Do you want your paci, Baby?" Daddy asked.
Bruce flushed and looked down, feeling upset. Daddy was worrying about him instead of watching the movie.
Daddy lifted Bruce's chin, forcing Bruce to look at Daddy. "What's the matter, Baby? Why are you crying?"
Great, now Daddy was upset. Bruce scrubbed angrily at his eyes, which he hadn't even realized had been leaking. "Nothin's wrong, Daddy. Let's watch movie." Bruce tried to smile
Daddy frowned. "J.A.R.V.I.S., pause."
No! Bruce opened his mouth to protest, but Daddy gave him a firm look that made him stop. Daddy shifted Bruce's body so that Bruce was facing Daddy and straddling his lap. "What's wrong?" he asked again.
Bruce felt his lip begin to tremble. "I-I not want to bother you. You were w-w-watching the movie and looked happy, and I didn't want to- to make you not happy." Bruce looked down at his hands, which were in his lap.
Daddy's arms, strong but gentle, wrapped around Bruce and pulled him against Daddy's chest. Bruce could feel the faint hum of the arc reactor.
"Baby," Daddy said, and his voice sounded funny, "never worry about bothering me if you need something. I don't care what I'm doing; you're more important. Okay, Brucie?"
Bruce frowned. He could think of tons of things Daddy could be doing that would be more important than him.
"Whatever you're thinking, stop it," Daddy scolded. Bruce felt Daddy's hands pushing him back so they could each see the other's face. Daddy's eyes were a little red, and that made Bruce sad. Trying to make it better, Bruce raised his hand to his daddy's face and cupped a cheek gently. Daddy turned his head to kiss Bruce's palm. Continuing, Daddy said, "Brucie, Baby, you are the most important thing in the world to me. There is absolutely nothing that I would put before you if you needed me. I love you."
Bruce teared up again and hid his face in Daddy's shoulder. "I love you, too, Daddy," Bruce muttered.
There was a pause where Daddy didn't respond. "I know you do, Baby. I want you to promise me something."
"Okay, Daddy." Bruce would do anything for Daddy.
"Whenever you need something, I want you to tell me, no matter what I'm doing, or how unimportant you think what you want is. Okay?"
Bruce didn't want to agree, but he'd said he'd promise. Besides, Daddy asked, and Daddy was good. Daddy wouldn't ask unless it was a good thing to do. "I promise, Daddy."
Daddy kissed Bruce's hair. "Good boy. Now, do you need your paci?"
Bruce was pretty sure that he wasn't good, but he would try for Daddy. So he answered honestly, "Yes, Daddy." He paused before adding, "Can I take off my big-boy clothes too?"
"Of course, Baby." Daddy motioned for Bruce to stand up, and then they went to Bruce's room, Cão hanging from one paw in Bruce's hand. Bruce had his own room now, and it was filled with toys and science posters and stuffed animals and a crib and a lot of other cool stuff that Daddy had gotten him.
Daddy placed the paci against Bruce's lips, and Bruce immediately sucked it into his mouth, the smooth, rounded surface rubbing the interior of his mouth, and the weight of it on his tongue making him relax.
Daddy guided Bruce to the bathroom and used a washcloth to wipe Bruce's face clean. Then, Daddy helped Bruce unbutton his shirt and take off his pants and underwear. Bruce lay back on the changing table and stared up at the ceiling, sucking rhythmically on the paci, Cão clutched to his chest, while Daddy diapered him. After that, Daddy dressed Bruce in a soft, purple onesie that had a hood on it. After Bruce slipped on house shoes in the shape of bears, he and his Daddy went back to the living room.
"Do you want a bottle?" Daddy asked.
Bruce shook his head. He was okay now.
Daddy sat on the couch and held his arms open for Bruce, who crawled into his daddy's lap sideways and leaned his head on Daddy's shoulder.
"Play, J.A.R.V.I.S.," Daddy ordered.
"Pwease," Bruce removed his paci to say.
"Yes, Young Master Bruce," J.A.R.V.I.S. said.
"T'ank you."
"You are very welcome."
Daddy shook his head at the exchange, a fond smile on his face.
The movie started up again, and it was a little more scary now that Bruce wasn't being a big boy anymore. Daddy could tell, though, and held Bruce tight, and Bruce knew that Daddy would protect him. Cão would, too, because Cão was really brave and strong.
When the end credits began to roll, Bruce was fighting sleep. Daddy fed him a bottle, and Bruce sucked sleepily from the nipple until all of the chocolate was gone. Daddy gave Bruce the paci again and guided Bruce to his crib
Bruce arranged himself to his liking, and Daddy kissed him goodnight. Bruce mumbled something, but he was sleepy and the paci in his mouth made talking hard, so he didn't know if it came out right. Daddy smiled anyway, and then Bruce stopped fighting and went to sleep.
Bruce woke up in his crib, and his diaper was wet. He started sniffling and then crying.
"Do not fret, Young Master; Sir shall arrive shortly," J.A.R.V.I.S. reassured.
Sure enough, Daddy came into the room less than a minute later and began cooing softly. Bruce made grabby-hands at his daddy, who helped him out of the crib and pulled him into a hug. "Come on, Baby; let's get you changed."
After the diaper was taken care of, they went to the kitchen, and Bruce watched Daddy make a bottle. This one was banana.
Bruce sipped at it on his own while Daddy made eggs, toast, and coffee for himself.
The morning continued lazily. They watched cartoons, and Bruce drew a bit. Mostly, though, they just cuddled and relaxed until it was time for Bruce's nap.
When he woke up around noon, Bruce was big again. He rid himself of the onesie and diaper and dressed in sweats and a t-shirt.
He found Tony in their bedroom.
"Hey," he said as he took a seat beside Tony on the bed.
"Hey." Tony smiled, but there was something weird in his eyes.
"What's wrong?" Bruce asked.
Tony hesitated before he said, "Do you remember what you told me?"
Bruce thought for a moment, wondering what Tony meant. After coming up with nothing, he admitted, "I'm not sure what you mean."
"When you were upset, and I was comforting you-"
Bruce sucked in a sharp breath as he remembered.
"I love you, too, Daddy."
"Oh," he said, unsure how to react.
"Oh," Tony agreed. "Did- did you mean it? I mean, no, I know you meant it, but can you say it again?" There was a hint of hope in his voice.
Bruce felt nervousness consume him. He swallowed hard and ran his tongue over his lips. He opened his mouth and tried to speak. "I-I-" His tongue tripped and tangled as he attempted to force the words from his mouth. Panic spread over him, harsh and unwelcome, making his heart beat forcefully and irregularly. A cold sweat broke over him, and God, this was so stupid! Why couldn't he just say it? It was true, and Tony wanted to hear it, deserved to hear it.
"Hey, hey." Tony's voice interrupted Bruce's inner monologue. "It's okay; you don't have to. I know you love me, Bruce, and I know it's hard for you to say. I just thought that maybe you'd made that leap, but it's okay that you haven't."
Bruce tucked himself into Tony's side, again extraordinarily grateful that the man was so understanding. Tony's arms wrapped around Bruce, and the panic that had been taking over receded.
"Thank you," Bruce whispered into Tony's shoulder.
Tony pressed a kiss to Bruce's hair. "I love you."
Bruce cuddled close.
Author's Note:
Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave me a review; constructive criticisms, praise, or thoughts/questions you had while reading are all amazing. Part three, Discoveries, will be up next week, so be on the lookout for that as well!
Tschau,
~lexthemess
