Kindness In Regret
Disclaimer: Sooooo not mine~ It all belongs to J.K Rowling (Lucky Her)
So sit back, Read and Hopefully Enjoy~ x3 much love plz comment
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Slumped over in my seat I watched sleepily as Slughorn continued his little rant, my eyelids growing heavier by the second. And of course I let my mind wander from the deary lessons to something far more interesting. My eyes drifted at a lazy pace to the bored boy beside me who let his small chin rest in his delicate palm.
Oh how I loved this boy.
Who knew the petite and oh so lithe Severus Snape could be a sex kitten. Sex kitten? You must think I've lost my mind. That I belong in the funny house bound up in a thick white straight jacket. Who in their right mind would think that disgustingly pale, sickly boy was a sex kitten. You had much to learn about not judging a book by its cover. The way he whimpered, moaned and screamed my name was a dirty little secret kept between Severus and myself. And now I was sharing this little detail with you.
Severus was mine in the way in the way my robes were mine. I could dispose of him in the same way I could use him. Easily.
Slipping my hand beneath the desk I let my fingers dance up the leg of his pants, watching his expression change from his dutiful expression to one that closely resembled pain as his jaw tightened and eyes grew strained. The closer my fingers got, the more he the stricter his posture became till I finally reached his hardening cock. This was one of my favorite things about him, no matter what my mate was ready to play. Sometimes I ridicule him. Calling him names. Calling him a whore. A slut. My fuck-toy.
Others I we would make love in silence of words, only my grunts and his wanton moaning, pained whimpering and heavy panting of our breath mingling together.
And on a rare night, when I found myself missing my kitten I would make love to him, raining compliments and rain my words of affection down on him, cooing and caressing him with a softness every time I gave him, he received as if he would never known the feeling it.
This sort of activity was the one I would try to avoid.
Making love instead of fucking like violent animal, hurting him as if he were prey instead of loving him like a person, making him bleed over the sheets till they were not only the clean white I could sleep in but the crimson Severus weeped upon when I thrusted into him without any sort of control or restraint. The crimson I ripped away from the mattress in anger and self hate when the high of sex and dominance left me with nothing but pain in my chest and aching in my heart.
My words were true when I whispered how much I loved him. I, like so many others, were just to tainted with sin to express it as show it.
I Lusted for my Severus.
I claimed him with the Greed that tainted me.
I was a Glutton for his screams.
I had to much Pride to express how I regretted making him cry when we fucked.
I Envied the way he seemed to hold no guilt over what we did in the darkness of this castle.
Though I hadn't lost myself to sloth but when it came to wrath I was merciless.
I'd torn my knuckles till they were bare, bleeding knuckles on faces and bodies of those who touched my Slytherin. Somehow it remained that I, Severus and my victim were the only ones who knew that their injuries were brought on to be a warning to others to keep away from my lover, my friends never hearing of what the reason behind my vicious attacking of them was. And they never asked. I doubt I would have told them the real reason why but I made a clear example of what would happen to someone who laid a hand on my innocent Severus.
Yes, Severus was still innocent, no matter how many times I dirtied him, or forced him to spew filthy words form his quivering sweet pink petal lips. He would look at me with not lifeless black eyes but with loneliness in the way that made me want to reach out and caress him. He was still filled lonely, insecure, scared and vulnerable on the inside and I could do nothing to make these things heal as I could do nothing that would force them to disappear. I never knew out of everything that was Severus, what seemed to keep this innocence inside of him.
"S-Sirius." He panted my name, and I realized my hand had stopped petting is erection, "Please. Please Master."
His own small hands laid over my hand, his own fingers intertwined though didn't move my hand. Smiling I rubbed the heel of my hand against the bulge till Severus stiffed and the bulge seemed to soften. His moan came in a whisper only I could hear as he brought one of his hands up to bite the tip of his thumb as he closed in eyes to perfectly mirror a look of being deep in thought. I reached out and took one of Severus' hand into mine, it was a sign that made his posture soften. I would be kind and soft to him today.
Our signs consided of these:
Sign I. Hand holding meant I would praise him that day, making sweet gentle love to him.
Sign II. No attention meant I would hurt him. Badly.
Sign III Irritated looks meant I would hurt him, but not so badly as the sign before this but with insults more then physical abuse.
Sign IV And on days we fucked over and over again with only the reason of laying sigh upon each other, we would screw without the violence of II or III but without the emotion of I.
When the bell rung, our hands parted, mine langishly and his as if a lightening bolt had hit him. He gathered his many things and shoved them into his bag while I simply stood and slung my own bag over my shoulder, having avoided with task since everything I'd brought for this class had remained in my bag the whole class, and watched him. It was all a hurried, messy act, his eyes panicked as he tried to rush. I chuckled, smiled and swatting the pale hands away from his own things and took his bag from him. I stared at him most of the time, my eyes only flashing away for a split second to find the various items. Today would be his day.
Leaning forward I slipped one hand around the back of his neck, bringing him forward to kiss his forehead, hidden by the now abandoned desks in the empty classroom, and I laid one of the few and definitely most chaste kisses I've ever given, happiness almost bursting from inside of me as Severus blush a deep red and gave me cheek a soft peck.
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Oooooooooooooookay~ I hope you liked it~
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