Hello! Still not over these two and I finally have vacations, so here's another story yayy. This will be in three chapters so stay tuned for more!

He had always been a beautiful boy with beautiful words and as she stepped into the bookstore, heart thudding wildly in her chest, she thought that his words might actually be what she missed the most. His touch, his smile, certainly. But even now, after so much time had passed, she had flashes of moments where she would recall something beautiful that he had said or written and the words would come to her with such clarity, she knew she would never be able to forget them, not even if she never saw him again, not even if she tried.

You're so much stronger than all the white noise.

The bookstore was reasonably packed and people milled about, more teenagers than older, chatting about the new captivating story that had recently hit the shelves. Her own copy of the book was clutched tightly in her hands, spine cracked thoroughly, corners already fraying from the many times she had flipped through the pages after the first time. Looking for specific moments, rereading parts again and again until her eyes ached and her body begged for sleep.

She walked further into the bookshop unsteadily, wandering behind a shelf to hide herself from view. She didn't know whether this was a good idea. No, she was certain this was definitely not a good idea. But reading the book had cracked open something inside her chest, something she had spent the last three years running from, and when she had seen the date and time of the signing event happening here in New York, she hadn't let herself think. She had forcefully stopped herself from thinking, just woken up the next day, taken a bus and now she was here. Not thinking, still bleeding, barely breathing.

I'm gonna go blind if you keep smiling at me like that, Betty Cooper.

It took her one long sweep of the room to spot him, but then again, to her eyes, it seemed second nature. He was the center of attention today, standing at the end of the room where a long booth had been set up, with a few other authors sharing his spotlight. And god, he looked good. Same dark hair, same beanie, a shy smile twitching at the corner of his lips as he talked to someone with a copy of his book in their hands. But he looked so much different too, a picture out of time, taller, healthier, and so bright, like all the time she had spent hiding in her darkness, he had only managed to step out and conquer his.

Her eyes drank him up, even from her hidden spot, snagging on every part of him changed and unchanged. Maybe this could be enough. Maybe she could observe him for a few moments longer and then leave, some part of her fulfilled. Maybe she should never have showed up.

There was a considerable queue in front of his booth already, new excited fans clutching untouched copies and flipping through pages, waiting for their turn with the brilliant new author. Mind over Murder hadn't hit the bestsellers list yet but it had generally been very well received, especially amongst the young-adult readers, where it was stirring up quite a name for itself. Even though it was hard for her to be objective, she completely understood the appeal. The murder investigation itself was masterfully woven from the first page to the last, but it wasn't the main attraction of the book, not even Riverdale's retro small town setting, or its mysterious yet cliché undertones.

It was the characters that gave life to the story, himself and his friends that he had managed to capture so perfectly on page that when she had read the book for the first time, she had felt like she was reliving her life rather than reading about it from paper. The characters who were immature and cliché and broken and imperfect. But so, so real.

It was brutally honest. But honestly perfect. And she wouldn't have it any other way.

Look at me –hey, look at me! There are no parts of you that I do not love.

She traveled inconspicuously through the shelves, wondering what she was really doing but attention too invested in him to care. He looked so much more mature than when she had last seen him but she couldn't pinpoint exactly what had changed; maybe it was how his shoulders had filled out; or maybe it was the way he was holding himself a bit straighter, like he knew what he had accomplished and was proud of it. His hair was shorter, that characteristic curl still peeking out from underneath his beanie that made her ache with nostalgia. The urge to see his face up close was sudden and intense, making her clutch the book in her hands more tightly. God, what was she even doing?

She ran her fingers along a row of books, pretending to browse. Her heart felt like a fresh bruise, a nauseating mix of longing, misery and guilt churning restlessly in her gut. There was a part of her that wanted to march up to him and face him once and for all, and then there was the other part, the part that was already begging to cower, warning her to leave before things got out of hand, before she had a chance of tilting the precarious balance that she managed to establish in her life. She released a quick breath, standing on her tiptoes to peek over the low shelves-

"Betty Cooper?"

With a small gasp, she turned around, ponytail flipping in the air, heart picking up speed like a deer caught in headlights. Standing in front of her was a teenage girl, tall and lanky, with curly black hair cut short and an outfit that seemed like a careful ensemble of all black. Her eyes were large and green, and her thin mouth was twisted up at one corner, almost unpleasantly.

Betty's throat suddenly felt too dry, "J-Jellybean?"

The girl tilted her head, looking completely unfazed and analyzing Betty like she was revaluating her opinion about her brother's ex on the spot. Her eyes flicked up and down, judging Betty's pastel attire, and then landing on the book in her hands. "So you've read it," Jellybean concluded.

Betty couldn't tell anything from her voice, or even her face. But then again, she couldn't tell anything about Jellybean at all. She had met the girl only a few times in the almost two-and-a-half years that she and Jughead had been together, and that girl hardly compared to the teen in front of her now. Three years was a long time, Betty knew. Especially in teenage years.

"I have," Betty replied, unsteadily. She felt the uncertainty knocking at the fragile façade of her new life, small cracks flacking across the surface and spreading. Even though she had marched herself up to the bookstore without second thought, some part of her hadn't expected to be confronted by anyone, let alone by Jughead's sister. But she was in too deep now. Panic welling up in the pits of her stomach, she plastered on a half-genuine smile and said, "How have you been, Jellybean?"

Jellybean's gaze bore into hers, direct and unblinking, "Why are you here, Betty Cooper?"

Her tone wasn't accusing, rather, it was too flat, too neutral, like she was genuinely curious.

"I-" Betty started, nails digging into the cover of her book, "I don't know."

Jellybean let out a little snort. She was still analyzing her, trying to figure out her intentions, and her eyes were so much like Jughead's, Betty almost wanted to look away. "You broke my brother's heart," she said bluntly.

Betty winced. Her eyes flashed to the rings on Jellybean's fingers, three on each, and then to a small fandom button at her collar, the reference on which she couldn't recognize. She coughed even though her throat was clear and then said, "I…it wasn't intentional."

Jellybean raised an incredulous eyebrow. With her tall stance and arms crossed haughtily over her chest, Betty got the feeling that the teen didn't have a hard time getting others to do exactly what she wanted. She passed Betty an almost condescending look and then said, "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

And against all absurdity, Betty found herself smiling.

Peeved, Jellybean frowned, "What?"

"Nothing," Betty said, shaking her head, "You learnt that from Jughead."

"Maybe," Jellybean replied ominously. Without warning, she reached forwards and plucked the book out of Betty's hands, ignoring the blonde's yelp of surprise. She flicked the book open and randomly started flipping through the pages, "Underlined and dog-eared," she observed, with a hum. "Very thorough."

Betty felt unexpectedly vulnerable as her eyes followed Jellybean's fingers thumbing through the pages. The parts she had underlined felt like a culmination of everything that was important to her, her regrets, her guilt, her happiest moments. All encapsulated in a few lines.

Jellybean stopped flipping at a random page, eyes passing over underlined words, "What was your favorite part, Bella Corner?"

Bella Corner was a sunflower, her bright yellow petals hiding a dark center. And I don't know what I was drawn to more- her brightness that seemed like salvation, or her darkness that was my soul mirrored back at me.

"I don't know," Betty lied. The name Bella Corner seemed to hang in the air, her alter ego on page, the Betty of the past. The girl Jughead Jones had fallen in love with. "What was yours?"

"The part where Jughead called our dad out on his shit," Jellybean said. "Or the part where he got in a fist fight on his birthday. Or that brief period of time when he and Bella broke up."

Even though the words were meant to be biting, there was no real punch behind them. Betty couldn't figure out whether Jellybean was actually mad at her for what she had done, or she felt like she had to be, for her brother's sake. "Good to know you were rooting for us," she tried to joke.

Jellybean glanced up at her once with her round eyes, "I was," she admitted, turning another page of the book. Even her movements reminded Betty of Jughead, the way she held the book a certain distance from her body, or how her long limbs filled up space around her in a manner that just felt natural. "When you first got together, I didn't think you were his type." A little smirk lifted the corner of her mouth to one side, "He told me you were a cheerleader and I laughed in his face –and I was eleven."

Betty felt a little laugh escape her mouth, almost a surprised exhale. The knots in her chest faintly released their hold.

"But then I met you," Jellybean's voice was quieter, more serious. "And he seemed happy, you know? So I abandoned the elaborate plan I had fabricated to make him dump you on the bus over to Riverdale."

"Very generous of you," Betty said, even though she couldn't help the smile that spread across her lips at the memory of a younger Jellybean giving her a similar version of the stink-eye she had received just moments ago.

"Doesn't seem to matter much now, does it?"

Betty's lingering smile disappeared in a sigh. They both stepped away to let a man pass them by through the shelves and Betty couldn't help but note the faint look of satisfaction on Jellybean's face. It seemed like the teen had decided that making her feel simultaneously guilty and uncomfortable was too fun an opportunity to pass up. She continued flipping through the book and Betty barely restrained herself from reaching forwards and ripping it back from the girl's hands.

"So," Jellybean started, still not glancing up, "you're here to talk to him?"

"I don't know," Betty said, once again. She let out a small, fake laugh, "I didn't exactly think this through."

Giving her a dubious glance, Jellybean deliberated her for a few seconds and then grabbed her arm, starting to pull her through the shelves, "Come with me, Betty Cooper."

For a moment, Betty thought that Jellybean was about to drag her towards Jughead and she panicked but then she realized that they were headed in the opposite direction of where the booth was set up. Jellybean led her towards one of the large reading tables set towards the back of the store, pulled up a chair and plopped down, "Sit," she ordered.

Betty sat down. Here too, a few people milled about, mostly those who were not interested in the event going on at the front. She clasped her hands on top of the table, trying to keep her fingers from fidgeting.

Jellybean lounged back against her chair, ankle resting on knee, looking at her in deliberation. "So, is this your end-of-the-movie moment? Where the heroine realizes that the hero was the love of her life and knows she fucked up?"

If it were someone other than Jellybean, Betty would have been offended. But even though they hardly know each other, they had once been two of the most important people of Jughead's life and Betty realizes that that connection was enough for them to actually know one another, even with their limited interaction. Betty still remembered all the little tales Jughead had told her about the two siblings over time and she knew that Jellybean probably knew such tidbits about her too. Even with the distance between them, the siblings had talked relatively often and she knew how much Jughead doted on her little sister, how much he wished that they could live in the same house.

Betty cleared her throat a bit uncomfortably, changing the subject, "Jughead…is he still living in Boston?"

Eyes still annoyingly perceptive, Jellybean gave a reluctant nod, "He took a semester off to go on this book tour, but he'll probably start again after the summers."

Betty nodded slowly even though she had already figured this out without Jellybean's confirmation. Even with radio silence from her end, she had never had the guts to unfollow him from any of her social media. He barely ever posted, a habit that had not changed since they were in high school, but ever since his book deal had become a real thing, he had gotten more active on Instagram, giving updates on the book-related things and some life-related things too. And she would be lying if she said that she didn't spend a little too much time staring intensively at each photo every time one popped up.

Betty continued hesitantly, "And FP…he's doing okay?"

Jellybean raised her eyebrows. "Well enough," she said. She put her chin on a hand and leaned forwards, flippantly candid. "Dad's always had a soft spot for you, you know. I used to be so jealous of that."

Betty was caught off-guard, "What?"

"Your senior year," Jellybean recalled. "Mom and I came to Riverdale a few months before Jug's graduation. She dragged me with her to one of her old friend's and when I came back to the trailer, you were there. The three of you, Jug, dad, and you, sitting around the table like a proper little family, eating some fancy roast chicken or shit. Dad –he never quite figured out how to be around me, but you…he treated you like a daughter."

The words got caught in her throat, her mind immediately flashing back to the night in question. It had been a month since FP had gotten out of prison and Jughead had gotten back to living with his father after almost two years with his foster family. He had grown to love them too but he had been ecstatic that he was getting a few months to live with his dad before he went off to college. For those few weeks, things had been calmer, the whirlwind of their lives settling into gentler waters. She remembered him dragging her into his room in the small trailer afterwards, the words he had whispered against her skin in the dark.

I am such a fucking goner for you, Betts.

"I-," Betty licked her lips. "I'm sure that's not true, Jellybean,"

Jellybean shrugged. "He still doesn't really know but he tries I guess."

Betty's heart gave a little pang at the words. It had been more than a month since she had last talked to her own father and the same couldn't be said for Hal Cooper. Hal's problem had always been not trying enough.

Again, Betty tried to shift away from the subject. It seemed like Jellybean had no qualms in bringing up hard, uncomfortable truths and Betty –she was still in the process of comprehending the situation she had landed herself in to contemplate all the hard, uncomfortable truths of her life. "It's –it's really nice that you're here right now," she said, hesitantly, "for Jughead."

Jellybean started thumbing through Betty's copy of Mind over Murder again, more lazily this time, and not like a few moments ago when she was trying to uncover all of Betty's secrets. "I guess," she said, a small acknowledgement of Betty's statement.

And then, just as suddenly, she closed the book shut and passed it back to Betty over the table, heaving a large exaggerated sigh, "I really wanted to dislike you, Betty," she declared like it was a large inconvenience. "But fortunately for you, reading the book made me realize that you were there for my brother when no one else was. So instead, I'm going to help you."

Betty opened her mouth once, closed it, and then said, "Help me?"

Jellybean nodded, "You're obviously very confused. So, I'm going to try to clear things up for you."

"…Okay?"

"Uh-hmm," Jellybean said, almost enthusiastically. She leaned back even further down her chair, getting comfortable. "Let's rehash things a bit. So you and Jug were together for more than two years, happy, in love, despite the shitstorm that followed the death of Jason Blossom. But then something happened with your family which caused you to go into a downward spiral. You cut off all ties with Riverdale and then ran off to college to escape." She paused, gauging Betty's reaction with the barest raise of an eyebrow, "How am I doing so far?"

Betty tried her hardest to keep her face from flinching. It was a bastardized version of the story but nevertheless, it was the truth. It was almost refreshing, how there was no beating around the bush with Jellybean. Veronica, Archie, Kevin, they had been too compassionate, too empathizing and she suddenly wanted the harsh reality that Jellybean was throwing at her face. She wanted someone to tell her how unfair it was what she had done, how cruel she had been.

"Accurate," she said, the waver in her voice giving her away.

Jellybean didn't blink. "Jug never really told me what made you run away," she admitted. "But it must have been something bad."

She thought of those few days, awash by memories she hadn't revisited in months. They didn't seem as painful as they once were, but there was still a bitterness associated to them, to the events that had finally made her snap like a rubber pulled tight. She couldn't pretend that she was mentally healthy before that time either, but somehow she had been managing. Until it had all become too much.

"It was," Betty said, "But I wasn't exactly the picture of mental health before that either."

Jellybean almost look impressed at her admission. "And now?" Jellybean asked, the first bit of caution Betty observed from her since the conversation started. "You want to…make amends?"

Betty sighed. She flipped open her copy of Mind over Murder, rubbing the corner of the first page between her finger and thumb. "I didn't know what I was expecting when I bought the book," she started, eyes flickering downwards, intently observing the tabletop. Maybe trying to explain to Jellybean what she was doing here would make it clearer for herself too. "He had let me read some parts of it, you know. When we were in school. But some parts of it, he kept to himself like a well-guarded secret, like our first kiss. He said he wanted it to be a surprise if the book ever got published. I thought it was so unbearably cheesy and so unlike him, but then I understood the real reason behind it. He wanted all those parts to be perfect. And at that time, they hadn't been."

And then because she looked so distraught, because I wanted so immensely to take away her worries, and because I had never really stood a chance anyway, I took her face between my hands and kissed her. It felt like a breath released from my lungs. I didn't realize how long I had wanted to kiss Bella Corner until, standing in the middle of her pastel bedroom, she kissed me back.

Jellybean was looking intently at Betty, taking in each word. No matter how close the two siblings were, this was a side of Jughead that Jellybean had never known.

"When I read it, I thought all those parts were perfect, of course," Betty said with a small laugh. "I used to be his biggest critic, but I was his biggest fan too." Now that she had started, she realized that she was a tap opened, all her feelings rushing out at once. She couldn't believe that she was confiding in Jellybean of all people, but then again, it made sense. They shared an unusual connection, but a connection nevertheless. "So much time had passed, and I missed him of course, but it was a scar more than a fresh wound. But when I read the book-" Betty released a breath and it seemed to shudder through her ribcage. The words came to her then and suddenly everything made a lot more sense. "I realized I had never really gotten over any of it."

For a few seconds, Jellybean didn't say anything and then, "Closure," she mused. "Never knew it was a real thing."

Betty supposed that closure was exactly the word to be used to describe her situation but she didn't like how it sounded. So final. So perfectly complete. Like after she had resolved her grievances, she could put her past in a neat little box and shove it at the back of her closet, never to be seen again.

"The event finishes at one," Jellybean informed, a bit softer after Betty's sudden deluge of feelings. "You should talk to Jug. I don't think you're the only one that needs closure."

"What-" she accidentally pulled too hard at the page, crinkling the corner that she had been fidgeting with. "what do you mean?"

"Oh, please," Jellybean rolled her eyes. Leaning forwards, she reached for the book and then flipped over a side, landing at the page just before the first chapter. "Let's not pretend that this isn't for you."

Betty gulped, staring at the familiar words of the short dedication. When she had opened the book for the first time, her hands were already shaking, heart caught in her throat. And then she had read the two words, printed in a neat italics on an otherwise blank page and she had stopped. Stopped altogether, frozen to the spot, fingers hovering in mid-air with a stillness that felt unnatural.

For Juliet.

Jellybean rolled her eyes again, though this time the gesture was more affectionate, "I can't believe my brother turned into such a sap. It's disgusting."

Betty cracked a smile. "He was always a big romantic at heart," she said, a little hoarsely. Her eyes flickered back to the page, tracing over the small print. It still seemed a little unreal that those two words were written inside every single copy of the book in circulation. That there were people probably states away, flipping open the cover, briefly pausing to read the two lonesome words before turning the page, not knowing the world of meaning trapped inside them, not knowing how the small phrase had managed to completely shatter her heart.

And maybe this was the reason. Not closure, not her unresolved past, but these two small words written for the sole intent that she was going to read them and she would know. That he still thought of her, that he was as torn up over what had happened as she was, and maybe even that he forgave her. It was like a beacon, a honing signal, calling her here, transporting her to her past.

"I was a little miffed out," Jellybean said. "I always thought he would dedicate his first book to me. But first love trumps sisterly affection, I guess."

"I should do it," Betty said suddenly. "I should talk to him."

Jellybean took her abrupt outburst in stride, grinning slightly. "And here I thought my job was going to be more difficult."

Betty felt tingly all over, anxious at even the prospect. What would she say? What would she do? She supposed that the right place to begin would be with an apology but she wasn't sure how she would go about doing such a thing. I'm sorry I completely shut you out for the past three years, but I'm here now, so let's grab lunch? And he had his event today…wouldn't it be selfish of her to just show up and ruin it for him?

"Nuh uh," Jellybean interrupted her thought process, tone exasperated. "I can see you backpedaling, Betty. Suck it up and go talk to my brother. I'm going to tell him that you were here anyway."

"You are?" Betty blurted out, before she realized. Of course she was.

Jellybean didn't even bother to grace her with a reply. She leaned closer, "Look Betty," she started. "The truth is I don't really know you. We don't really know each other. And even after all that happened, Jug turned out doing wonderfully for himself, which even I can recognize." She looked so serious to Betty then, her eyes holding a maturity beyond her years. It was so reminiscent of the way Jughead had seemed during their high-school years, like he was an old, tired soul trapped into the body of a teenager. "But I know that you –this, whatever happened, it's still one of the biggest regrets of his life. And if he can have a chance to get over it then –well, I'm all for it."

Betty blinked, ignoring the stinging in her eyes. She realized that she had been so focused on her own issues and guilt that she had neglected to think about what Jughead must have been feeling after all this time. Maybe it had to stop being about her now. She had to do this for him –for both of them. She didn't know what would come out of any of it, but after how much she had loved him, how ardently he had loved her back, she had to, at the very least, apologize; try to explain herself.

"You're right," she nodded, eyes flickering to the table. "You're right. He –he didn't deserve what I did. And he doesn't deserve to feel bad over it either." She swallowed up her anxiety and gathered her courage, flexing her hands to prevent her old habit from resurfacing, "I- I'll talk to him once the event is over."

Jellybean was quiet for a few seconds before she said, with an approving lilt to her voice, "Good."

Unceremoniously, she stood up, tucking her short hair behind her ears, and brushing a suede boot against the back of her calf before replacing it back to the ground. "I gonna head back before Jug starts wondering where I am," she said. Giving Betty, the barest hint of a smile, she turned around and started to walk away, "Don't bail out, Betty Cooper."

Betty didn't know how much longer she sat there, heart thudding in her ears as she gathered her resolve. Her mind riffled through all the possible scenarios that the encounter could lead to. Either he could refuse to speak to her out flat. Or he could give her a chance and that could end in one of the most awkward conversations of her life. Or something completely, entirely different could happen: he could forgive her and they could once again be….friends.

Just because you're afraid doesn't mean you aren't the bravest person I know.

The clock on her phone almost nearing twelve thirty, she stood up before she could convince herself otherwise. Slowly, she started making her way through the bookstore back towards the front, her book clutched tightly to her chest, heart once again picking up speed. The queue in front of his booth had shortened considerably but there were still a few people left. Betty slid in, the last in line, behind a guy whose tall frame would surely block her from Jughead's line of sight. She didn't want him to know she was there until she could talk to him directly to his face.

Slowly the queue shortened, as more and more people got their turn with him. Even though she was still trying to remain inconspicuous, she couldn't stop her eyes from latching onto him, observing each and every interaction. His disposition was still far from welcoming, but she could tell, even from where she was standing, that he was very honest in his interactions, small smiles twisting at the corners of his lips, expression enthusiastic as he and the person in front of him had an engaging discussion.

All too soon, she was the second last person in queue, still positioning herself in a way that the guy in front of her was hiding her with his body. Her stomach was a well of anxiety, her heartbeat a crush of roaring waves.

His head was bent towards his phone when she stepped up to the table. With shaking hands, she opened the book to the page with the dedication and pushed it towards him. The dilapidated condition of the book caught his attention and then the two words of the dedication, underlined with her shaky hand.

"You can make it out to Betty," she said.

With the jerk of his head, he looked up. His startled bright eyes met hers.

The world blinked and came back to life.

tbc