Heya! Well, this is a humour story with a hint of angst.......... Mmmmmmm................. Annnnnnnnnnngst.................
It's an odd little tale, this is, but it's an idea I've had for a while.
Inspiration came from the novel 'Speak', by Laurie Halse Anderson, which I highly recomend reading.
Oh, and the characters might be a bit OCC. For which I apologize. *Deep bow*
Disclaimer: Me no own. Me would have been nice and released both games by now! Or at least some new trailers...
I hate Noctis Lucis Caelum. I want him to die. I want him to be hung, drawn, quartered, and fed to the dogs.
The same should apply to high heels. Hang on, the dogs would choke on the heels. High heels should be burnt then. Then the ashes should be fed to the dogs.
"Fuck it!" I snap as I lost my balance for the sixth time that hour. Smug Bastard, also known as Noctis, represses a smirk.
"You okay?"
"No, I'm not. Who invented high heels?" Whoever it was should be made to wear their own terrible inventions for eternity, while ballroom dancing to a perfectly decent piece of music getting slaughtered by a drunk and/or high orchestra.
Because that's what's about to happen to me. Caelum can shove his balls up his ass. And I just realised how that sounded. ... I wouldn't mind if he shoved those up his ass either.
"Try not to swear too much." Noctis mutters as I sit on one of the steps to shove the damned shoe back on. "Or hit anyone."
"If you think I'm going to behave badly, why did you bring me to this blasted thing?!" I hiss, slamming my foot on the concrete to wedge my foot back in. Damn it hurts. "I'd have been far happier not going!"
"You needed to go to one eventually." The bastard explains. "And doesn't that hurt your foot?"
"I'm used to a bit of pain." I reply, hitting my foot on the ground one last time. My foot gives in and slots back into the torture device. With a growl I stand up and carefully walk up the stairs. Noctis decides to take my arm to help me. I convince him this wasn't a good idea by hitting him.
"Ow!"
"Good!"
"That's the sort of thing you shouldn't do." He sighs, and let's go. "Promise me you'll try to behave."
"I'm not a two year old Noctis."
"Lightning."
"Fine. I'll behave. Happy?" I grumble, probably sounding like a two year old. I wince at the thought.
"Not really." Contrary to his words, he smiles and drags me through the doors into a very large ballroom.
I flinch for three reasons:
1. The lights are far brighter than those out in the corridors and staircases.
2. There are many people talking... loudly...
3. There is a very poor trained orchestra screeching through a piece of music.
There is no doubt. I have entered Dante's Inferno, the circles of hell. Taking a guess, I decide it was the fourth or ninth circle. Possibly the centre.
"Ah, your majesty!" A man comes up to us. He has an awful lot of neck for such a short man. "An honour to see you and your..." He glances at me. I glare back, hearing the cogs in his brain turn to try and find the right words. "Partner?"
... Clearly those cogs need oiling.
"No." Noctis shakes his head, a slight shade of pink on his cheeks.
"Concubine?"
"No!" I don't know what their definition of concubine is, but I know what mine is, and boy oh boy, he is not dominant. If we were in a relationship, which we're not.
"Prostitute?"
"You-" Noctis slams his hand over my mouth before I can begin to berate the arrogant asshole. The temptation to bite down on his hand is very high.
"She's just a friend." Princey forces a smile onto his face, and starts pushing me away. "I'll join you in a minute."
"Of course your highness." Asshole gives a little bow before scuttling off to join another group of men. Noctis shoves me hard into a slightly less eyeball-searingly lit corner of the ballroom.
"Just stay calm, okay?" He asks. "Don't start any fights; just... talk about small talk."
Small talk. The weather, health, gossip, I hate it. You should only speak when you have something to say. That's why I prefer to keep my thoughts to myself. They're mine. No-one else needs to know them.
"Fine." I snarl through the leather glove still over my mouth. Noctis nods and let's go.
"Go talk to some of the other women. I'll meet up with you later."
"I'd rather talk to the men." I mutter.
"That's not proper decorum." Noctis shrugs. I growl and dig my nails into my palm.
"I don't give two stuffs about your decorum!" I whisper-yell. He sighs and runs a hand through his hair.
"Please?"
"... Fine. But you owe me."
"You've reminded me that about twenty times today." He grins and walks away, merging back into the sea of dark suits.
My feet are killing me. I lean against the wall to make sure I keep balance, and scan the room for anyone that might be decent enough to talk to.
"Oh, hello." A woman's voice suddenly pipes up.
Nope, fate decided it would find someone for me. Into the jaws of the beast, I shall dive...
I glance towards the sound coming from just next to my left shoulder. Woman, average height, thin and with quite possibly the thickest layer of make-up I have ever seen on anyone who isn't employed in the circus.
I make a mental note never to complain about Serah wearing lip gloss again.
"I'm Diana." She smiles. I wonder if it took her extra effort to do that with the weight of all that make up. No, I correct myself, never judge by outward appearances. That's what you did with Snow, and – OK, he is a moron, but not as much as you thought he was.
I suddenly realise the pause in the conversation is for me to insert my name.
"... Lightning." I mutter. Both her eyebrows shoot up. Screw being nice about her; the speed was probably due to the fact there was no make-up on her eyebrows.
I hate it when people react to my name like that. The only worse reaction is when people actually openly laugh at it. Or ask what my parents were smoking when they came up with my name.
"How... unique." People always emphasise the last word of that sentence. Doesn't matter what word they've picked, unique, interesting, unusual. It just makes it sting more.
I'd love to have a boring everyday name like Jane or Susan. ... On second thoughts, I'd hate it.
Diana smiles and tugs on my hand like an irritating puppy with a piece of rope.
"Come and meet the others!" She beams. I allow myself to get dragged towards a three young women, standing around the table holding glasses of... I don't know what.
"Oh!" Another woman with short black hair suddenly pipes up, turning all attention to me and Diana. Yay. Just what I want. "And who's this?" I open my mouth to tell them my name or to say fuck off. I haven't quite decided.
"This is Lightning."
... Clearly I am not given the dignity of deciding or introducing myself. Maybe my brain isn't as developed as their sophisticated ones are.
"Lightning?" Black haired woman raises ginger eyebrow. "Interesting." She glances at me, glass in one hand, bored look on her face. "Your parents must have been fascinating people."
... I am not a hundred percent sure what her insinuation is, but I know I don't like it one bit. I wonder what she'd think of the name Serah.
"Oh don't be so mean Adela!" A blonde woman titters. Clearly she gets the insinuation. "I'm Stella." She smiles and gives a tiny curtsy. I blink.
"And I'm Juliana." Another woman speaks up. "And if I'm not mistaken, I saw you come in with prince tall dark and beautiful over there."
It takes a few seconds for it to click. She must mean Noctis.
"Um, yeah." I shrug and avert my gaze to the floor. Please not a Spanish inquisition, I shall go insane.
"So?" Juliana will not let me fade away. "How do you know him?"
"He's a friend."
"A friend!" Diana scoffs. "Sure."
What is it inserted in people's head which makes them unable to understand the concept of male and female friends?
"He is!" I dig my nails hard into my palm again. I hate this so much. I want to curl up and die, I have no idea what I'm meant to say.
"Our secret dear." Juliana grins. "Do you want a drink?"
A drink. That sounds good, I'll have an excuse not to talk if I've got something in my mouth.
"Yes please." I manage to twitch my lips upwards.
"No problem." Stella grabs a glass. "What do you want?"
"Um, what's there?" My voice is just above a whisper, which isn't good when there's an orchestra hell bent on destroying everyone's ears not too far away. Stella tilts her head to one side.
"What is there to drink?" I repeat, raising my voice slightly. Adela smirks in amusement, and I find myself instantly hating her a lot. Stella leans forwards, pushing her hair away from her ears. "What is there to drink?"
"Oh!" Stella grins, and turns to the table. "Well, there's punch, champagne, and wine."
"What's in the punch?" I wonder out loud, beginning to feel a small pit of worry in my stomach.
"Fruit-"
"No, I mean liquids."
"Oh, what alcohol? Wine I think." I can feel myself turning crimson. And Stella notices. "What?"
"Um... I don't drink. Alcohol, that is..." I stutter like mad. This isn't like me, not at all. A glance is exchanged behind me. Stella blinks then shrugs.
"There's some water here, would you prefer to have that?" She asks, lifting up a jug. I nod.
"Thank you." I take the glass. It feels like ice against my fingers. I'm definitely blushing, and I think there's a tiny chance I may be sweating. If questions are raised, I shall blame the lighting.
There won't be questions though, just silent judgement. Oh no...
"Why don't you drink?" Adela asks, sipping at her own drink. Small talk alert. How I hate it.
"I don't like things fuc –" I barely catch myself in time. "I don't like things screwing up my mind."
Have I gotten away with it? Diana and Stella have no reaction, Juliana merely raises an eyebrow a fraction, but ginger eyebrows shoots both of hers up. Perfect.
"So, where do you come from?" Diana asks. She's like a dog with a bone. She shall never give up. In a way, I admire her dedication, but it's really getting on my nerves.
"Cocoon." I say, waiting for the reactions. There's a slight pause as they quickly pick what to say.
"That's the one with all the jungles..." Adela decides.
... Thirteen centuries of history, warfare, bloodshed and strife, and my country is described by someone as 'the one with all the jungles'. I feel insulted.
"It's called Cocoon." I add tensely.
"I know what it's called." She replies coolly, sipping on her drink again. I really, really want to punch her. I dig my nails in again. I shall have dents in them by the end of the evening. Tiny grooves are already forming.
"I need to relieve myself." Stella suddenly pipes up, breaking the mood. I want to kiss her – Wait. No I don't. But I'm grateful nonetheless. "Who's going to come with me?"
Hang on. She needs someone to go to the toilet with her? That is just odd. Does she think she's going to be attacked by a crazed criminal on the way there and need back up? Do they carry stun guns in their dresses? If so, damn Noctis for making me leave my weapon behind.
"Oh, I will!" Diana nods and picks up a little bag. "I need to redo my make-up."
I hope by redo, she means wash most of it off. I'm amazed she can keep her eyes open. The duo skip off. Well, maybe not skip, but it's pretty close to it.
Juliana smiles at me and sips her punch. Adela stares off into the distance like she's stoned. Maybe she is. But don't bring that up! Don't ask if she's stoned! No, now I can't think of anything else to say but 'Are you stoned?'
"There's not an aristocracy on Cocoon is there?" Juliana asks. I shake my head, silently thanking her for the interruption to my thoughts for once. "Oh. So what about your background?"
Background. What background? I don't have one.
"I used to be a soldier in the army." I say, keeping my gaze fixed on my water. "But then I left."
"A soldier?" I can feel Adela turn her gaze onto me. I feel like I've been hit in the stomach. I glance up and sure enough, her gaze is contemptuous.
Class. It's all a matter of class. I am a common foot soldier. She is clearly not. I'd be surprised if she knew how to fire a gun.
"That's right." I decide to meet her eyes. She wrinkles her nose.
"That's right, your highness." She corrects. I instantly want to punch her; my fist begins clenching of its own accord. Juliana turns to Adela.
"Don't be rude. She's just like us tonight."
What the fuck am I? Cinderella? I don't see any pumpkins or friendly fairy godmothers. Plenty of evil witches and princesses though. Oh no, I'm going redder. This is a disaster. I can see the two chuckle sisters heading towards me.
"Oh, oh!" Stella's got a very loud voice. Especially when it's right next to your ear. "You'll never guess who we saw just now!"
Sure as hell I won't. There's nothing quite like being completely out of the loop to make you feel that little bit smaller.
"Electra!" Diana shrieks in a high pitched tone, and I just about manage to stop my water spilling everywhere at this jolt. "Can you imagine? How can she show her face?"
"I know!" Juliana laughs. "It was so embarrassing!"
They really all love to yell at pitches that make my eardrums give up trying to interpret them. Speaking of which, there's a high chance my ears are bleeding.
"Um," With one little noise, all attention turns on me. Odd. They shriek and yell, and yet you can grab everyone's attention with one small noise. "Where... Where's the toi – Um, er..."
Oh holy shit, what do I call it? I can't say toilet! Or can I? What did Stella say, she wanted to relieve herself?
"Where's the relief room?" Blank stares all around.
The ground refuses to swallow me up. I presume it's because I've already sunk as low as you can. I have a feeling my face is clashing with my hair.
Wait I'm in a green dress, which means I'm green, red and pink... Dear Lord, I must look like a candy cane. There aren't any bows on this dress are there? Noctis got it from somewhere – Wait, where did he get a dress from? Oh God, bad images – Noctis crossdressing – Very very bad! Why did I not think of this before? Oh shit.
"Relief room?" Adela asks with a sneer, raising an eyebrow. I'm getting redder. I wonder how high your blood pressure has to be for your head to explode. I'm certain I'm nearing that level.
"You know, the em, er..." I cannot think of a single euphemism for toilet. What is wrong with me tonight? Maybe that was actually vodka in the jug. Oh screw it. "Where's the toilet?"
"Oh!" Stella giggles. "You should have just asked silly! It's over there, next to the statue of the naked man-"
"Half naked." Juliana corrects. I nod and quickly begin to walk away. "Lightning!"
I spin around to face her – Eye contact is meant to be useful, even if it is awkward and hard to maintain.
And high heels, being the evil demons they are, decide to add to the humiliation I have already endured, skid away from under me, bring my legs along for the ride, and send me plummeting onto the floor. It had to happen. The floor was polished to a lethal shine.
Everyone in a wide radius turns and stares at me. Sniggers and snickers erupt. Smirks are on every face.
"Are you okay?" Stella grins. I nod, stand up, and run as fast as I can to the toilets. Oh dear God. I am normally very balanced, but these stupid heels add too much height. They're highly unstable.
I lock myself in a cubicle and pull the sins against humanity off. I will never wear any of these again. They can burn in hell. Or maybe I'll flush them down the toilet...
Before I can attempt that, the door slams open. I lift my feet in case anyone's looking for me. Luckily, it's three voices I haven't heard before, chatting and laughing about someone falling in love with a servant. I don't know and I don't care. I check my ears. They aren't bleeding.
"Speaking of affairs with the lower classes," The loudest says. "Did you see that woman Prince Noctis brought with him?" I freeze and stiffen. My nerves are red raw, and I'm ready to attack.
"Did he pull her out of the gutter?" The other one snorts. "Honestly, what did she look like?"
"I thought she looked decent enough." The third judges. "She could have fitted in I suppose." Yes. Because I want to fit in with you, you superficial little bitc –
"Clearly you weren't watching when she fell over!" The loudest cackles. "No elegance. None at all."
"Who is she anyway? A prostitute?"
What is it with people and prostitutes? They seem to be obsessed. I'm so angry though. I feel like I'm going to scream.
"Some soldier." The loud one dismisses. "No, I'm wrong – An ex-soldier. She's nothing."
My mouth opens to scream, and I quickly gag myself with the nearest thing. My arm. I bite down hard, leaving teeth marks and dents. It hurts, but it takes my mind off the bitches. I can still overhear snippets of their conversations.
"Worthless-"
"Doesn't fit in-"
"Freak-"
Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech!
I wince and cover my ears as a god-awful noise comes from the ballroom. Noctis didn't tell me anything about sacrificing animals to Etro –
Wait, it's the orchestra. Instantly the bitches squeal.
"Ah, the main dance." One exclaims. I can't quite tell which, they all sound pretty similar when they're screeching. "Found a partner ladies?"
"Of course!"
"As if we wouldn't have!"
"Good, then let's get out there."
The door creaks open and slams shut again. I'm on my own. It's a relief. I'm still biting my arm. Apparently, the forearm is the best part of the human body, which tastes like chicken. ... I've been hanging around Snow too long. I spit my arm out and wipe it clear of saliva.
The door opens again. I sigh, and wonder how small these people's bladders are.
"Lightning?" Stella's voice drifts in. "Noctis is looking for you. It's the main dance... you better get out here."
Oh God. Dancing. In high heels. Considering I can barely walk and cannot run in them, I doubt I'll be able to dance. This will be a disaster.
Is there anything wrong with going barefooted? Probably. I bet it's against health and safety, or their damned decorum. I growl and start to shove my feet back into the shoes.
"Lightning?"
"Just a minute!" I call out, trying to pull my shoes on as silently as possible. I manage to squeeze them back in, by rolling my toes under the rest of my foot. I think I'm just cursed with the world's worst luck. I flush the toilet so it covers any suspicions she may have – I'm becoming as bad as them – And ran outside.
"There you are!" She grins, before glancing at the sink. "... Aren't you going to...?"
.... DAMN IT! I quickly run my hands under the tap – the hot one.
One of the signs of wealth is clearly that boiling hot water comes out of the tap the second you switch it on. There's a high chance my hands may be permanently scarred from that little incident I muse, trying my hands on a towel.
"Done." I try to return her smile but fail. I follow her out of the door, back into the circle of hell. The toilets are not a good sanctuary.
Noctis comes up to me, that media influenced smile on his face. Stella's vanished, and I'm being dragged onto the dance floor. Oh no.
"Noctis, I can't dance!" I hiss, making him laugh. I glare as hard as I can at him, and thankfully he sees it and falls silent.
"It's easy."
"Not when you're wearing abominations."
"What?" He frowns in confusion. Was he not listening to my rant earlier?
"...High heels."
"Oh, right." Noctis wraps both arms around my waist and pulls me a little too close. "It's nothing too complicated... just mirror what my feet do."
"I can't see your feet." I say, my voice being muffled by his shoulder. I lift my chin so I can actually see something that's not part of a suit.
"It's simple." He mutters, clearly not really listening to me. The orchestra starts murdering a piece of music, and everyone begins to dance along to it. I stumble along to it, keeping a tight grip on Noctis to make sure I don't fall over.
As the music progresses, I become aware of something. Noctis' hands... are sliding down...
What the hell is he doing? I'm not comfortable with this, not one bit.
"Noctis?" I say, trying to repress a snarl. "What are you doing?"
"Dancing."
"With your hands genius." This time I can't keep the snarl out of my voice, but Noctis chooses to ignore this.
"Well... you don't have to go anywhere afterwards, do you?" He murmurs, making my face flush red. I can feel a smirk grow on his face as he slides them down further. I scowl and shove him away as hard as possible, tipping him backwards onto the floor.
Everyone stops and stares; the orchestra screeches to a halt. Noctis blinks in surprise, and it hits me.
I, the gutter girl, have just knocked over Prince Noctis Lucis Caelum, adored by all.
Oh fucking shit.
I bolt, run out of the door and stagger up the staircase. A quarter of the way up I fall over and land on my hands and knees. The stairs smells like disinfectant. I pull off the high heels, hold them in one hand and run up the stairs at full speed, looking for a way out.
For once, the deities are on my side, and a door labelled 'Roof Access' appears in front of my. At this point, it's one of my most amazing things I have ever seen. Except it's locked. ...They have a warped sense of humour. I spin around, desperately, wondering if there's a window to escape out of. And then I see the cupboard labelled maintenance.
With a quick prayer, I open it and see keys with a grimy little tag, and the words 'Roof'. It's not stealing, just borrowing. Without asking. For as long as I need to. OK, fine, it's stealing. Not everyone has the privilege of having morals.
The door is unlocked with a click, and I escape into the open air. I close the door behind me, and look for somewhere to sit. It's only now I've realised how stifling the building was. It's cool out here, and I can breathe. I flop onto the ground and look around the roof. Empty and silent.
Tonight was torture. I've never been more mortified in my life. I don't care what that bastard says, I am never going to another one of these in my life. And he can use his media charm and words all he wants, I won't go!
I fling the high heels as far away from me as possible. I will never touch high heels again. I shall burn all of Vanille's. And feed the ashes to the dogs – If we had any. I'll get Snow to run over them. That works.
The roof's cold. My entire body's shivering. I shall never fit in. Even with Vanille, Snow, Serah, - My own sister damn it! - Sazh, Hope... I'm always outside. Either figuratively or literally, like now.
Who knew a rooftop in Tenebrea could have the same temperature as a frozen lake? Especially the ground.
I looked down and realise three things, in quick, terrifying succession.
One, my dress has ridden up. Two, I am sitting on a skylight which shines down into the ballroom. And three, there are people looking up.
I am so screwed. I stand up, pull my dress down, then make a mad dash for some shelter. Not only did I shove Prince Noctis Lucis Caelum over, but I then flashed my underwear, accidently, at the entire party.
There's a bruise on my arm, almost a perfect circle. I'm surprised no-one's spotted it yet. It's rather large and stands out. Then again, I suppose people don't find things unless they're looking for it. I sink back onto the floor, making sure there's no skylight underneath me.
I have an instant longing for home, but I don't have one. Not really. I have no address, no friends, no identity... They were right. I am nothing. It's safer that way, but it's definitely not easier. It's far tougher, but I have to be tough to survive. I wonder if any of them knew what to do if Cie Corpses came hurtling towards them, apart from possibly Noctis.
Noctis.
I can't believe what he did to me. That was so... so wrong. We're friends. Not like that, it was just disgusting. He better have a good reason for doing that, otherwise I'll punch the living daylights out of him next time I see him. Actually, I'll probably do that to him whether or not he has a reason. He deserves it. I hate him.
I bury my face into my knees. Snow's right, they are too bony. They're not comfortable to rest on. Biting them would probably break my teeth.
"Lightning?"
I scowl and make a fist. I told myself what I was going to do, and the second arrogant bastard comes in view, I stand up and punch him in the face.
That felt good.
"Ow!" He winced and grabbed his face. "Okay, I probably deserved that – OW!"
"Probably?!"
"Definitely, definitely deserved that." He corrects himself, and ducks to avoid my next punch. I hit his stomach instead. "Hell!" He doubles up. "I'm sorry! I came up to apologize!"
I pause, keeping my fist up. Despite myself, I'm curious. I want to hear his excuse.
"I am so sorry. It was so stupid." He carries on, taking advantage of my hesitation. "I've had too much to drink, and I wasn't thinking. I would never do that to you normally! You're one of my friends. I'd never hurt you like that. I'm sorry."
Part of me screams that sorry isn't good enough. Part of me wants to tell him to fuck off. Part of me wants to sit down. Part of me wants to continue punching him. Part of me wants to accept his apology.
I shrug.
"If you ever do that to me again..." I let my voice trail off and make a fist. He nods.
"You'll kill me."
"That'll be after I castrate you."
"Of course." He grins.
"And you're never taking me to one of these things again."
"But-"
"Noctis." I glare at him. He raises an eyebrow.
"... We'll discuss that later." He holds his arms out. "Hug? Promise I'll keep my hands up this time." I roll my eyes and reluctantly give him a hug. Luckily he keeps to his promise and keeps his hands wrapped around my shoulders.
Maybe I do fit in somewhere. Maybe Noctis and I can be friends, can keep it together. Maybe I'll be able to fit in somewhere, and my stomach starts filling with hope.
But then I look at the sky above us, and it's like a plug's been pulled. It's starless, cold, and completely dark. There's nothing out there.
Ah, that was an angsty last note!
Still, let me know what you thought! Liked it, loved it or loathed it? Or was it somewhere inbetween? Trying to write in the present tense when you're used to writing in the past tense is hard! Eh well.
So, lemme know what you thought!
Peace out dudes and dudettes!
SunflowerWielder