So, I haven't written anything in over 5 years but I've been toying with this one-shot idea for a while now. Ever since season 3 left my wanting Vauseman to get their shit together and fix things. So, here is what came out of it. I'm sure there are grammatical and spelling errors, which I apologise for since English is not my native language.
It's been 4 years since Aydin's attack. It's been 3 years since they last saw each other. Alex and Piper meet each other after Alex's release, neither knowing what to expect next.
"Alex!" I hear the familiar voice speak behind me, and I can't help but smile. I turn my stool around and look at her standing a few feet behind, same smile playing on her lips. Her hair is still shoulder-length and still blond. Her blue eyes gaze at me and I see a spark in her eyes, matching the smile she has plastered on her face. I can't put my finger on what exactly changed, but she looks different. She looks happy, which I'm glad for. She also looks older, but after all it's been 3 years since the last time I saw her. Before this turns into a long staredown I exclaim "Come over here!" with my arms wide open, happy to hold her in my arms again. She gladly takes it and buries her face into my shoulder.
"It's so good to see you." she whispers in my ear and I close my eyes, taking in this moment of enjoyment. When she pulls out of the hug I stare at her beautiful blue eyes and nod my head "You too, kid."
Flashback
It's been three months since I got out of Litchfield and life had started to fall into place. I had a place to stay with my aunt in a small town in North Carolina, made friends with neighbours who have never been in prison or related to drugs, except for occasional marijuana puffs which is next to nothing anyways, and since some days ago got a job of logistics manager for a company dealing with cosmetics through my aunt's friend that works there and I was quite happy with how things turned out in such a short amount of time. There was only one thing that was still on my mind on the "unresolved" list of things to do when I get out of prison: meet up with Piper. Which now got a hell lot more complicated since I would be moving to New York and my own flat in Queens a couple of days from now. So here I am, pouring my third glass of white wine, surrounded by a few boxes of my stuff I would take with me and looking down at my phone realizing how stupid it is to have such a hard time to get in touch with her. I didn't even know if she owns the same number. I pushed all the thoughts away and dialed the number she gave me before she left Litchfield some years ago. A familiar voice replies on the other end of the line with a "Hello" obviously oblivious to who is calling.
"Hey, Pipes." I say and feel the nervousness overcoming me slowly, so I start pacing around my small apartment before continuing "It's Alex." I feel a small second or two go by before she manages to reply "You do know I'd recognize that voice any day, right?" I chuckle at the first thing that she tells me and she continues "Oh my God! There was no Litchfield-intro before the call. Are you out?" her voice is happy and a smile plays on my lips too when I realize that this conversation is going to be easier than I thought it would.
"Yeah, I got out some months ago. Got an early release. How've you been doing?" I try to sound as calm and normal as possible, even though my heart is racing ever since she picked up the phone. I would never admit that to her or anyone else tho.
"I've been doing good. It's been three years, Al. We should probably not catch up over the phone." She says, probably aware that there is too much to talk about to do it on the phone. Besides, she probably still remembers that I'm not really into long phone calls. Remains of drug trafficking life.
"Yeah, that's why I'm calling. I'm moving to New York in a few days so maybe we could meet up when I'm there. I mean, doesn't need to be right away but just in general…" I notice myself rumbling before she interrupts me mid-sentence and says exactly what I wanted to hear "Whenever you want, Al. I'm free and we can meet up as soon as you get here. I'd love to see you."
There is a smile on my face and I'm not sure if it's wishful thinking, but I feel like she is smiling on the other end of the line as well.
"Great! I'm moving there on Saturday. Let me get there, drop my stuff in my new flat and we can meet up at some bar in the evening. Sounds good?"
"Perfect. I'll call in sick since I should be working the evening shift at the restaurant so we can go out and talk. And I know just the bar we have to go to." She says with a smirk and I have a feeling it won't be a new hipster place she is taking me to. But God, how I can't wait to see those blue eyes again.
She pulls a stool to sit next to me and gives me a long look, with the same smile still on her face. It feels crazy, to be sitting at the very same bar we first met in, some 15 years ago. So much has happened and changed since yet sitting here, next to her, it feels like time has stopped. I wish we were still the two people we were back in the day: the cocky international drug smuggler that just saw the most beautiful pair of eyes in her life and a young, freshly out of college girl from Connecticut that was craving adventure. But, we are not those people anymore and so much has happened since we were: the good, the bad and the ugly. And the really good. As I was getting lost in my own thoughts the bartender comes along and asks us what we would like to have.
"Tequila shot for me please. How about you, Al? Rum or whiskey?" Piper speaks to the waiter and then me, noticing me chuckle at the fact she gave me two options, but exactly the two options she knew I would think between when it comes to shots.
"Rum for me please. And make them both double." I reply and smile to the waiter before turning my full attention to the woman sitting next to me.
"Sorry I'm late by the way." She says nonchalantly and I chuckle "You were always late. Some things never change I guess." And before we fall into a silence, I decide to break the ice and learn something about the past few years of her life "So, how have you been? It's been 3 years, right?"
"Yeah, almost. Sometimes, Litchfield feels so far away to me that I can barely remember it. But sometimes, it almost feels like I never really left. Especially when I wake up in the morning, it still takes me a few seconds to realize I'm not in Litchfield anymore. It's weird." She starts rambling but realizes very soon what she is doing so she stops herself. I chuckle at it. She quickly regains her composure and continues. "And how about you, Al? How was Litchfield after I left? And how have the past few months been for you? Tell me everything." she elbows herself up and looks at me, waiting for my reply and I can see she expects a long story.
The bartender comes back with our drinks and we shot them down rather fast, and I ask the guy to bring us one more round before starting the story of Litchfield.
We talk for hours and we already filled each other in on the most important parts of our lives: I told her about all the crazy and not-so-crazy stuff that happened in Litchfield, like Nicky and Morello actually getting together as a couple and Morello divorcing for her, about Daya getting out of prison and Bennett being there finally, about Red losing the kitchen and gaining it back one more time some months later, about Healy retiring finally. I told her about Big Boo coming back from the max some months after she left and how happy it made Doggett. I fill her in on everything and anything really and the look in her eyes says that she feels like she is walking down those hallways, witnessing all of it. I also tell her that I did my best to stay out of trouble and really didn't do anything too eventful for the past 3 years there, except reading books and actually figuring out what am I going to do when I get out. I told her about the new job, and she agreed that my previous career also proves that logistics are my strong suit and earns herself a slap on the arm.
She tells me about how her parents have bothered her so much since she got out about anything really: that her life is ruined, that she will never have a career, that Polly was having the life with Larry she was supposed to have, a new baby on the way included, and everything else really. She tells me how she barely talks to them, except for Cal and Neri, and that most of her time is consumed by her work. How she started in a restaurant as a waitress but is now a manager of one of the restaurants in the chain, looking for another potential promotion. She tells me she does meet up with some friends she used to have here and that she also made amends with Polly, but they are far from the friends they used to be.
Five more shots and 3 beers later, we have caught up on life in general and are laughing and remembering that day when we were both in Healy's office explaining what happened in the laundry room at the very beginning of our sentences.
"I'm more of a dishwasher kind of girl" she says trying to imitate me "How the hell did you come up with that line, Al?"
"The face of that homophobic prick was inspiring." I reply and all of a sudden the laughing subsides and we are stuck staring at each other into the eyes.
"It's so good to see you again, Al." she says while looking into my eyes "It's been hard and weird not having anyone to talk about all these things to. No one really gets what Litchfield was like." She says and looks into the distance, probably trying to make sense of her sentence and explain properly what she means by it.
"It's good to see you too, kid." I reply and smile and she mirrors my smile. Her face goes all serious as she looks me into the eyes and straights her body posture, fiddling with her fingers and not really looking me in the eyes, not constantly at least "You know, after… what happened, I didn't think we would ever be able to sit here and have a beer and talk, like actual human beings. I'll never forget your forgiveness, Al. Thank you for that and I'm still so damn sorry for being so stupid." She says in the most serious tone she's had that night. I know she's honest, I've known it for the past four years, and I can see the sincerity in her eyes now too. Both sincerity and regret. I nod slightly and touch her jaw gently with two fingers, bringing her eyes on the same level as mine "Hey, Pipes, it's ok. I forgave you a long time ago. And you saved me in the end, so there is nothing to apologise for." I tell her and she slightly nods, but I feel like she is holding back tears. Tears over the time long gone and the days back behind the prison walls when I wasn't dead nor alive and she was breaking down due to regret and pain of not knowing which of the two sides of life I will end up on.
I still remember the time when and after Aydin's attack. Aydin fired a shot at me and missed my heart by less than an inch. I heard later that Piper was the one that heard the shot, got one of the guards to go after him while she set next to me, trying to hold the blood that was coming out of my wounded chest with her bare hands. Luckily, we had a doctor on site in Litchfield who came very fast. If she hadn't recognized Aydin, or the doctor wasn't as fast as he was I would've been dead now. The next month I spent in the hospital, went through surgeries and recovery. And then I was sent back to Litchfield, to continue serving my sentence. I was informed that Aydin was in prison, Kubra was killed in a police chase and my life was safe. I received an apology from Caputo and a promise that my safety will not be in danger again.
Flashback
I was sitting in my cube reading a book when I heard someone clear their throat in front of my bunk. It was my second day back at Litchfield. I looked up and saw my ex-girlfriend looking at me with the saddest, guiltiest look I have ever seen her wear.
"Hi." I said under my breath and made some space on the bed so that she can sit next to me. It was good to see her, I knew that deep down I still loved her no matter what. And after what happened I wasn't in the mood for fighting.
She walked into my bunk and took a sit on the bed next to me, trying her best not to cause any physical contact with me.
"Al, I just wanted to tell you that I'm so, so happy that you're alright. I was really scared that…" she trailed off and her eyes were filling with tears but she managed to continue speaking "I'm so sorry I didn't believe you, Al. I should have known better. I should have listened to you when you said he would come after you. I should have protected you. But I didn't. You were right, you know? I am a selfish, manipulative cunt. I'm sorry I brought you back here and I'm sorry I caused you so much pain. I'll try my best to stay out of your way for the rest of my time here. But, I just needed you to know how sorry I am for everything and how happy I am that you are okay." She finishes her long rant and her eyes are filled with tears and I can feel one roll down my own cheek as well.
"Piper…" I don't even know what to say so I just hold out my arm and interlace our fingers together, gently caressing her fingers with my hand. We are both looking at our interlaced fingers before I continue talking and she turns her attention to my face, not letting go of my hand even for a moment. "Thank you. Red told me you saved my life." I speak and can't stop my tears from crying down my cheeks nor do I want to anymore. "If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here. As for everything else… it's hard to keep track anymore of how many times we broke eachothers heart and how many times we apologized to each other for it. It's always gonna be you, Pipes. And I will always remember all of our times, good and bad. But, we need to stay away from each other, at least here at Litchfield. We seem to be successful at prolonging each other's sentences and I don't want that anymore. So, let the next time we seriously talk to each other happen outside of these walls." I finish firmly, still holding her hand. I knew it was not going to be easy, I knew I would hate myself for it, but I also knew this was the right way. The only way.
She nods her head slightly, looks at our hands and and says "I understand. You're right. We are toxic for each other." She lifts her head to look me in the eyes and says "I love you, Al. If there's one thing I learnt from all of this it's that I am so deeply in love with you and that nobody will ever come even close. So, when you get out, and if you want to talk things out or just be friends or whatever really, give me a call."
Now is my turn to nod and she continues "Where does this leave us now?"
"Friends, I guess?" I say as I laugh at the situation we are stuck into.
"You told me once we were never friends."
"Well, maybe it's time we tried to be." I say and she nods before pulling me into a big hug. "I'm so happy you are here." She says into my neck and holds me tightly, as if she is afraid I would disappear, for another few seconds before standing up and walking away.
As memories of that flood over me I wrap her into a hug, as if I need to confirm to her one more time that we are okay. She takes the hug, and holds me tightly, almost as tightly as she had that evening. I take in her scent, as if I needed a reminder of what it is. But it feels so good to hold her again.
"I'm alive thanks to you. Don't ever forget that, kid." I whisper into her ear before I pull away and wave to our bartender that we need more beers and more shots.
"Alex, we've already had a lot!" I hear her protest and I laugh "Come on, we can handle one more round. For old times sake?" I smile as the bartender approaches with our drinks. She picks up her tequila, smiles at me and downs it, following with a gulp of beer to clear her through "For new times sake." She says as she puts her beer bottle back down and I can't help but smile and do the same with my rum and beer.
We spend the next hour giggling at the even older memories of us, the memories from before prison. The amazing times we had together travelling the world.
"Remember the beaches of Morocco?" she says in a low voice and my head goes back to the memory of us at the beach, skinny dipping.
I nod in confirmation "You were so afraid of going into that water!" and a laugh escapes my lips. We both laugh at the memory of the completely scared young Piper, afraid something bad will happen to her if she goes skinny dipping.
"Hey, Pipes. There was one thing you never told me: how did your family react when you first told them about me?" I ask, changing the subject to keep myself from thinking about naked Piper, but also curious about this part of her life. We never talked about it much back in Litchfield.
"Well, my mom was in utter shock that her golden daughter was a lesbian. My dad was in shock she was in a relationship with a criminal. Everyone was shocked: my parents, Larry's parents, Larry. My boring fiancée at the time who didn't know how to tell his mommy his girlfriend was a lesbian. Oh God, I'm so happy to be so far away from all of that right now. My parents will never change, Alex. There was never a chance of them accepting that their daughter was dating a woman nor that, next to the woman being a drug smuggler, I committed a crime by caring that suitcase. Chapmans, the biggest fake image of perfect family there is." She says with an eye roll and takes another sip of her beer. I nod in understanding, realizing once more how screwed up her family was and how happy I was to have had Diane. Also realizing that went she gets flustered like this I should not push the topic further.
The night went on with a few more discussions about all different things: the memories we shared, the ones we didn't. Around 2am we both felt like it was the time to go get some sleep, before we end up with an even worse hangover tomorrow.
"Sorry! Can we have our bill please?" I ask the waiter and reach for my purse when I feel her hand over mine "No, tonight is on me. Welcome back to New York!" she says with an adorable smile that I can't resist and just nod "I'm taking you out next time then."
As we stand up to walk out, I notice that my legs feel a bit wobbly and then see Piper holding onto my forearm in order to walk properly. We did drink a lot tonight.
As we walk out she notices how uneasy on my feet I am and holds me as firmly as she possibly can, considering how intoxicated she is herself.
"Should I hail us a cab to take us home?" she asks and looks at me.
"You mean cabs?" I ask her back and she shakes her head "No, I mean cab. My flat is much closer than yours and you are wasted. You should stay at my place." She says nonchalantly and I raise my eyebrows and look at her, slightly shaking my head "I'm not sure if that's a good idea." But she raises her arm to protest "Come on, I'll sleep on the couch, it will be fine. Don't worry so much. Besides, I have a lot of beer at home that we could finish before going to sleep." And with that I just nod and laugh "Fine, get us a cab and lets drink that beer."
Forty-five minutes later we are in her apartment in Brooklyn, I'm comfortably sitting on her couch and she is bringing two beers over. She gives one of them to me, before she plops down on the couch next to me and puts her legs on the coffee table in front of us. I lift my bottle up as a cheer and thanks at the same time and she does the same. We sit in silence for a few minutes and it's comfortable, it's not awkward. Somehow, it's so easy for us to slip into comfortable mood. At least until she breaks the silence with the one question I hoped she wouldn't ask.
"Why didn't you call me earlier?" she is looking straight into my eyes and I feel like she is peeling into my soul. Her eyes are serious, the most serious they've been the whole evening and I know it's time for talks that won't be as easy as the ones we had so far. I'm wondering if I should have just went to my place instead of being stuck in this talk, but the other part of me knows this was inevitable. Just as inevitable as she was to me. The truth is- I'm not even sure what is the right answer to her question. I missed her. I wanted to talk to her, to see her. I just wanted to do it when I was sure I won't fall back into old, bad habits. I wanted to talk to her when I'm not this confused woman that just got out of prison and isn't sure what to do with her life since the only life she knew was far behind her. But also, I wasn't sure if I should call her. If she deserved me to call her. After all she hasn't called me while I was still locked up even.
I let out a loud sigh and focus my gaze on her too. "I don't know." Is all that comes out at first. But she knows I know better than that so she stubbornly stares at me, without saying a word, her face ushering me to continue.
"It's just that… I wasn't sure what would happen once I do. I know we agreed that I should but… I wasn't sure who I was anymore and I wanted to figure that out before I drag you back into my life. I didn't know if you would want me back in your life. I wasn't sure how it would feel. I didn't even know how much has changed for you since getting out. There was a lot I had to process and figure out first. I'm sorry it took me a while to come around, Pipes, but also… you never called or visited ever since you left." I avert my eyes to the floor cause I know she has an answer ready, I know that's what we had agreed back on her last day at Litchfield. But I can't help the hurt I feel over the fact that she actually did as I asked her to. It doesn't take her even a second to snap that fact at me "You told me not to call you. You said not to visit. You were the one who wanted us to deal with all of this only once we are both free!" her voice is annoyed and I knew it would get there "And for once, I wanted to be selfless. I fought my own desire to hear your voice, to share stories, to come and see you. To tell you how weird and empty the world outside of Litchfield feels with no one by your side who actually gets what you've been through. To tell you how much I fucking miss you. I wanted to, for once, do exactly what you asked me to. So don't you dare tell me that was wrong!" she is crying now and I feel so bad for bringing this up. I place my hand on her shoulder and stroke it up and down her forearm "I'm sorry. You're right." Is all I say as she nods and calms down slowly.
"I know the world feels empty. I feel like the woman that walked out of that prison some months ago is not me at all. The world I knew is gone – Kubra is dead, Aydin's in prison. I'm about to start a decent job. I want to be the person my mom believed me to be…" I get stuck on my words for a second, tears forming in my eyes. I stop them from falling before continuing "The thing is, Piper… I don't think I would have gotten here, to this person I am now, if it wasn't for everything that happened, the good and the bad. And looking back… I wouldn't change a thing. And I'm happy I'm here with you." She looks into my eyes and nods before she wraps me into a tight hug. With our legs still spread on her coffee table, out bodies are barely touching but it it's good to hold her. Her head on the crook in my neck and my hand caressing the back of her head. We stay like this for a couple of minutes, just enjoying each other. The hug is soft and tender, but we are both holding a firm grip on each other.
Flashback
One more hour. One more hour and she will be out of Litchfield. Out of my life, at least for a few years. And god knows where we will be by the time I'm out. I want to say goodbye to her, I do. After we made amends a year ago, we stayed friends. Or as much of friends as we are capable of being without falling back into our old habits of sex and messy relationship. We would talk. We would complain about things to each other. We would be there for each other. Not always. We would go to each other with things there was no one else to go to. And we would be friendly, have lunch with our friends, hang out in bigger groups. Doing our best to avoid being alone for too long. And that was it. I noticed her change and slowly become the Piper I had loved with all my heart. She stopped the power trip, and she took her time to really figure out who she is and who she wants to be and why it took her so long to get to the point where she lets herself be true to herself. We talked about it a few times and she told me it helped her get her mind and heart back where she wants them to be.
I need to say goodbye to her. But I need to make sure I let her go without holding her back here: without telling her to call, to visit, without making her promise to be there when I get out. I want her to build her life her own way outside of these walls and wherever we end up being as people once I'm out is whatever it was meant to be. It feels unfair to do anything else.
"Hey" her voice is soft and barely above a whisper but it pulls me from my thoughts. She is standing by my bunk, the same way as a year ago. I stand up from my bed and walk over to her, pulling her in a tight, bone-crushing embrace. She returns it. We hold onto each other for a minute before she finally speaks "I won't forget you Alex. I couldn't, even if I wanted to. I will call…" and as soon as she says that I pull out of the hug and look her in the eyes, cutting her off "No. Don't call. Don't come over to visit. Live your life away from Litchfield. And we'll talk when I'm out cause I sure as hell won't shake you off my skin." She nods, even though I know she disagrees with me deep down. "Ok. I love you, Al. Always remember that." She lets a few tears roll down her cheek and I brush them away with my finger. She comes closer to me and there are only a few inches between the two of us now.
I feel my breath catching up in my throat as she finally crashes her lips on mine, removing any space left between us. The kiss is soft and short, because she pulls away, both of us knowing that staying in that kiss wouldn't end well and would erase the promises just made. I mouth an "I love you, too." To her as she walks away, walking backwards, not breaking her gaze from me. And once she is gone and I can't see her anymore, I breakdown and cry. I cry for the life we could have had if I wasn't a drug smuggler 15 years ago. For the one we could've had if she didn't leave me in Paris. For everything that could have been but wasn't, because we were both too fucking stubborn to truly, freely just love each other without fucking each other over. And then I cry for the life she might build without me, hoping, but not expecting, that she waits for me to come around.
As we break away the hug, she pulls away, back in the sitting position she had and we both rest our necks on the back of the sofa, holding our beers, knowing that the can of worms is opened up now and we have to talk through some of the things we haven't talked about before.
"Are we ever going to talk about her?" I finally let out, knowing it's my turn for the questions. She nods, her eyes never leaving the ceiling she is looking into.
"What do you want me to tell you?" she says with a sigh, knowing fully this won't be easy for either of us.
"Why." Is the only thing I say back and finally dare to look at her. She is not looking back at me at all, but I see her shutting her eyes for a few seconds and swallowing the lump in her throat before she replies "Because I was a stupid, narcissistic, selfish cunt." She says and chuckles "because I thought you were being paranoid about Kubra and it annoyed me so much that you are not paying attention to me, now that we were finally really together. Because I got on a power trip where I believed I deserve all the attention of the world and my girlfriend wasn't giving it to me. So I just selfishly went for the first person that gave me the time of the day. It could've been anyone, so Stella herself has so little to do with it. She was there, looking at me hungrily, the way I wanted you to look at me. So I went with the attention I got." She shrugs, and I notice from her reply that she has given this a lot of thought. And then she turns her head around to look at me, our eyes meeting from different ends of the sofa "I never fucked her, Al. Two years ago I also removed that ridiculously stupid tattoo she gave me. I never should have doubted your fears from Kubra and I never should have let you dump me. I never should have been so swallowed up by the whole prison gang power trip that I had. And I never should have done what I've done with Stella to you. It's the second biggest regret in my life. I know I can't apologize enough for what I've put you through back then and if I could turn back time and change things, I gladly would. But we both know time goes only one way. I know there are no words that can stress enough how sorry I am for everything, but I also want you to know that I have changed so much since then. I've finally found out who I am and what do I believe in. It put so much into perspective." She finishes and her eyes don't leave mine even for a second. I turn around and take a sip of my beer, thinking about everything she just said, before being able to offer a response. "I've thought so much about you and Stella back in the day. The first time I saw you sitting with her while we were still together. I kept wondering what should I do to keep you with me. But then I realized I already lost you, to the power you so desperately wanted and to Stella. So I decided to let you go. Alex Vause was never the one to fight for love, huh?" a smile is playing on my lips and she chuckles at me "Well, you are here now, aren't you?" she says and I can't help the smile that spreads across my face "Oh, so you think this is me fighting for you?" I say in a mocking tone and she blushes at my words. I love her face when she gets like this. We fall into silence again, neither of us knowing where is this conversation going to lead now.
"What's the first one?" I finally speak again, too afraid of her answer but too curious not to ask. She gives me a puzzled look and I realize that she has no idea what I'm talking about. "You said Stella and that whole thing is the second biggest regret of your life. What's the first one?" I ask her again, intensely looking into her eyes. She moves closer on the sofa to me, looking directly into my eyes and I swear I can feel my heart skip a beat. She is sitting right next to me now and one of her hands is placed gently on my shoulder "Leaving you in Paris after your mom died." She says and squeezes my shoulder a bit, tears forming in her eyes. "I'll never forgive myself for not staying with you when that happened."
There are tears in my eyes now as well, slowly rolling down my cheeks. She tries to control her own tears that are filling up in her eyes and wipes away the ones that that are rolling down my cheeks. "Please don't cry." Her voice is barely above a whisper and I nod, wiping my eyes with both of my hands before holding her hands in mine "Thank you for saying that."
She squeezes my hands lightly, as if to show that she is grateful for my understanding. She lets my hands go and says "I'll go grab us two more beers." And as soon as her hands leave mine and her body leaves the sofa I feel empty, as if someone took a part of me away.
She comes back with two beers and sits back next to me on the sofa. I'm grateful she didn't move away from me.
"Enough about the past." I say and we cheer to that with our new, cold beers. "What are your newly found values, Piper Chapman?"
"Loyalty, honesty, being true to yourself, whatever that self is." She replies "Everything a Chapman is not supposed to be." We both laugh at this, and it feels like the tension is finally leaving the room.
"No, but everything you are. I'm proud of you, kid." I tell her and she smiles like a kid that got praised by the teacher. We lock eyes for what feels like eternity and the next question that she blurts out is such a typical Piper question "So, have you found yourself a new girlfriend after I left prison?" her eyes trail down to the floor as soon as the question rolls down her tongue, obviously completely uncomfortable with what she just asked.
I raise my eyebrows at her and laugh "Oh, that's what you want to know." I take a few seconds before I reply, wanting to make her tense a bit in suspense "No, I haven't. I figured prison relationships weren't really my thing, I kept failing badly at them. Besides, there was no one in that prison I wanted to date." Her eyes stay trained to the floor, but I can see a smile spread across her face. "How about you?" I ask her and she looks up, her face serious. "I'm engaged." She says and I can feel my heart shatter into a million pieces in a fraction of a second. Then she bursts out laughing and I smack her on the arm "Asshole!"
"Was that jealousy I saw in your eyes, Ms Vause?" it's her turn to mock me and I can't help but smile at her childish behavior. She then continues "When I got out, my mom insisted I should date. Unable to argue, I went to a few. Not even one of those guys peeked my interest so there was never a second date. After I finally moved away from my parents and pretty much cut the ties to my parents there was no one to bug me anymore and that was great. I could focus on my work and rediscovering myself. And after I rediscovered myself, I realized there is only one person I want to be with so I haven't dated since." Her voice is barely above a whisper, her body is fully turned to me and her eyes are not leaving mine at all. "Oh yeah? And who could that be?" I ask, wanting… no, needing to make sure that at least our feelings haven't changed. "One hot, raven haired, ex-con, ex drug smuggler, who I gave my heart to 15 years ago and never really took it back, no matter how hard I tried." She replies with a shy smile and I know there is a wild smile on my lips. I grab the back of her neck with my arm and pull her into a kiss. It's slow and soft and tender. It almost feels like the last time we kissed was yesterday and not 3 years ago. I break the kiss and rest my forehead against hers "I can't believe we ended up here, Pipes. I can't believe no time or space or fuck ups could've stopped us from finding our way to each other. I know it's not gonna be easy and I know it's gonna require for both of us to work for this but I want to—" she cuts me off with a quick, whispering "I love you." And I swear to God those three words have never sounded more beautiful. Our smiles have never been wider. And, as weird as it sounded, our love has never been stronger.
"I love you too, Pipes. More than you know." I reply and we let our lips crash against each other again, this time a lot more passionately, all our love and desire transformed into a kiss. Our tongues are battling for dominance and our hands are roaming each other's body, every single inch of it. As we break the kiss to catch some air I look at her and with a kink in my eyebrow say "You do realize neither one of us had sex in years and finishing won't take long?" she laughs at my observation and says "Good, then we'll have enough time for more orgasms than we thought we can fit in a night." And crashes her lips back on mine.
The sun is rising as she lays in my arms, my arm wrapped around her neck and her head gently resting on my chest. We made love for hours, rediscovering each other's bodies and trying to make up for the lost time as much as possible. She looks at me and I look back at her and we smile widely, knowing that this was it. That being here, together, was the only thing we ever really needed. That maybe, just maybe, all the shit we went through and put each other through was exactly what we needed in order to realize how much we love and need each other. To realize how empty our lives are without the other one. And if the time away didn't stop either one of us from wanting only the other, then I guess there was no going back anymore. Because, this feeling that I have right now is the best fucking feeling I ever had in my life. And I'm never letting this blue-eyed wonderful woman go.
As if she was reading my mind, she speaks in a low tone "I'll love you forever, Al. Please don't leave me, ever again."
"Not a chance, Pipes. This is exactly I want to be."
And with that, we lock lips once again before slowly falling asleep in each other's arms, knowing fully that, looking back, there was only one word suitable to describe what we were to each other – inevitable.
The end.
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