Okay I am giving you a warning. This is total crack. And I mean I don't think you will ever find anything more random.
You have been warned.
DISCLAIMER-I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS.
"Giantus Ferattio," the arrancar screamed as he cast his bankai. A ferret fifty feet tall appeared behind him.
"Did you just say giant fellatio?" Ichigo questioned the odd man in front of him. He was working his way through the huceo's mundos desert and had lost track of his friends as he ran into an arrancar.
"Lies, slander, burn him on the cross I say, BURN HIM."
"I am here to save the day!" On top of the sand dune stood Toshiro and his zanpakuto in human form Hyourinmaru, both wearing bright pink capes.
"Toshiro what are you doing here, and seriously dude, whats with the giant ferret/fellatio thing?" Ichigo now stood scratching his head
"I came to rescue you. DUUUR"
"He's not a fellatio dumbass, his name is Ferratio." Both Hitsugaya and the arrancar began talking at the same time.
"Changing the L to an R does not make it sound any less sexual. And I don't need rescuing. I'm not a damsel in distress"
"Yes it does make a difference thank you very much."
"Oh yes you did. I could tell this ferret was gonna kick your ass."
"How do you know. To me it looks like he does nothing." Ichigo was convinced this would be his easiest fight yet.
"Well that's because he hasn't done anything yet. One look and he could kill you. If he where mad you would die of excruciating pain, sad you would weep tears to death, a little excited, well lets just say it would probably be the best orgasm you ha-"
"Well that last one doesn't sound all that bad," It was Toshiro who had spoken at last.
"If you had let me finish I would have gotten to that part, but then you would have died.
"Oh." Ichigo and Hitsugaya chimed together.
"Here is an example." The ferret turned toward Hitsugaya, opened it's mouth wide and sent a great shoop-de-whoop beam there his way. Hyouruinmaru managed to shunpo in front of the beam before it hit his master.
"Hyourinmaru are you okay." Hitsugaya ran over to kneel beside his zanpakuto
"Oh course Shiro- chan, as long as you are alright I am alright." His voice strained a but on the last couple of words.
"Oh Hyou-kun how sweet."
"If there is gonna be a yaoi moment may I leave," Ichigo raised his hand and asked.
"If there is gonna be a yaoi moment can we stay and watch," This was from the random cape wearing not so masked avengers.
Ichigo sat bolt upright looking around to see himself in his room, lying at home. The rest of his family snoring in there sleep. That was one of the strangest dreams in the history of dream and he never wanted to see it again. Well almost never. Part of him wanted to have it all over again, just to figure out what the hell was going on.