Hey, guys! ^^ This, for some reason I'm sure is obvious, seems like a really big leap for me... first HibarixHana fic. ^^ Ever. As far as I know.
Haha, so, I'm wondering if this counts as crack? It's not as crack as something like HaruxBel, but... hm... Whatever. If you can put Hana with Tsuna, you can put her with Hibari! Besides... I really hate Ryohei... =_= Maybe that seems mean. He's just so... stupid, and sexist. D: And I actually do really like Hana, so of course the idea of them together seemed wrong to me!
Um, my inspiration came from reading other fanfics. ^^ A couple (a bit too many to be random, in my opinion) of them have said things like 'Hibari had thought she was pretty in middle school,' or 'he found her company more tolerable than most stupid girls' and stuff like that, which... rang very true to me. ^^
Hana Kurokawa is not a masochistic person, she knows this, and it's exactly why she's never spoken more than a few words to Kyoya Hibari in her lifetime. She's a popular girl- it's the sort of mixed blessing that comes with being Kyoko's best friend- and knows she probably hasn't escaped his notice, but she's also the kind of girl who likes rules and order.
She herself doesn't in particular hate or love the prefect, because he goes about his business and she goes about hers. Hana has heard plenty of times, and even seen, that he is a violent (and dangerous) boy, but he's done her no harm. And she has to admit that the fighting is a very pretty and controlled sort of violence.
But she still knows that he wouldn't show anyone slack.
Besides, Kyoya Hibari is (sort of, she supposes) one of those idiots who follows Tsunayoshi Sawada around while he does his stupid no-good things and causes her only best friend all sorts of grief, and that automatically puts him down in her book.
Still, they do share certain qualities, she recognizes. The first time she's made aware of this is when they're the only two who show up ten minutes early for a meeting, just to avoid the swarms of people they know will appear.
Hana because she thinks Tsunayoshi and all his friends (except Kyoko) are idiots.
Hibari because he's Hibari and hates people in general.
She sits in the corner of the room quietly, and he sits in the opposite. Hana pretends to read a book but she really watches Hibari over the top, how he reclines in the chair and yawns. He really doesn't seem intimidating. (But maybe Hana is a little intimidating herself.)
While she sits, Hana thinks. She thinks a lot, and she much prefers her own head to the world outside of it, but Hibari is one puzzle that she'd very much like to work out. He's cold and stoic, but she knows there has to be more than that to him. About why he's so violent. About why he hates people so much. Maybe he's shy, she thinks, but then she mentally laughs it off because the thought of Hibari as shy is completely ridiculous.
She doesn't say anything, because silence is a gift she rarely gets to treasure, with Kyoko and Ryohei hounding her at every available moment.
It's not bad at all, honestly.
Hana sort of wonders whether he's annoyed by her sitting there, and then it's odd, because she's never self-conscious about anything. But she gets the feeling that he's not bothered by her either. (In fact, he's watching her from the corner of his eyes, like she's an interesting animal.)
No, sitting with the prefect in complete silence is actually rather nice.
And even though they haven't exchanged so much as a friendly glance, Hana actually feels like she's got to know him, maybe just a bit.
Then Tsunayoshi and his stupid followers come in, and Kyoko sits next to Hana and gently takes her hand, and they proceed to spin a wild story of Mafioso and succession and men who shoot flames from his hands.
She's not sure if she believes it at all.
She's taking her time, making up the reasons
To justify all the hurt inside
Guess she knows
From the smiles and the looks in their eyes
Hana doesn't go home immediately after, even though Kyoko and Ryohei both offer to walk her home. She smiles politely, and says that she wants to have a bit of time alone to think. Kyoko's worried about her, but Hana's a big girl and she's (almost) an adult. She smiles politely and waves them away.
Then she walks down the street, thinking about what she's been told and how she really can imagine it. She's been suspicious, but mafia is rather unbelievable. Although with the way that they act, following that no-good Tsuna around like idiots, it's not implausible.
She can't picture Hibari as part of the mafia, however. Hana realizes her mind is stuck on him, and it's definitely not like her to act like such a stupid girl.
So she resolves to put the cold prefect out of her mind and she goes to a small and dingy bar where no one will bother to ask if she's twenty-one or even eighteen. It's something Kyoko would hate, if she knew, but it's the unpopular and quiet sort of place where no one asks too many questions and she finds it just perfect.
She sits in a corner and orders a few drinks, or maybe a bit more than a few, and thinks about the mafia. It shouldn't make that big of a difference, really, but she knows she'll never be able to look at her best friend the same way again. (And maybe she feels a bit betrayed, too.)
The drinks keep coming, and she drinks them, and she doesn't feel like she's drunk at all.
Hana's a responsible (almost) adult, and when it gets to be about ten, she takes out her phone and calls Kyoko, because she really doesn't feel like stumbling home drunk or getting molested. For some reason, Kyoko instantly knows that she's drunk (even though Hana doesn't feel drunk at all) and she says, "Ryohei will come right over to pick you up, Hana! Honestly, I don't what I'm going to do with you!"
"If it's your brother," Hana slurs, alcohol loosening her lips, "then I'd rather that no one come at all."
"Hana!"
"I'm okay."
"I'll see if one of the guys can come down, okay?"
"Not the silver-hair idiot."
"I'm assuming that you mean Gokudera. Okay, okay."
"Thanks, Kyoko." Hana stares at her empty glass sadly. "You're the best best friend ever."
"So are you, Hana. You're welcome."
Hana smiles and puts her chin down on the bar, swinging her legs like a little girl under the stool. The bartender shakes his head, tsks, and takes her glass away. She glares after him. Maybe she is more than a little drunk, because she's very tempted to order another drink.
The bartender asks her how she plans to get home, and Hana shrugs. "A friend is picking me up," she says.
He seems content to leave it at that, so Hana relaxes against the wall, content to close her eyes and sit in peace. In a distant corner of the bar, there are men sitting and playing cards, which seems like a cliché. All she needs to complete the typical girl-walks-into-a-seedy-bar scene is a handsome prince to rescue her.
Though at the rate things are going, her prince looks like he'll be a loud, idiotic, sexist pig of a man with too much of a fondness for the word 'extreme.' Hana dreads that thought.
The bartender points to the door, asking if that's her ride and Hana turns around slightly, her eyes sliding over the pretty lithe form of that prefect. She turns back around and says that he's not. It's a coincidence, though why Hibari has shown up in this dingy bar she can't begin to understand.
He stalks right over to where she sits and takes out one of his weapons, glaring at the bartender, and then he says- "For serving alcohol to a minor, I'll bite you to death."
It's the first words she's heard him speak in a very long time, but Hana almost laughs at how natural it seems to rebuke him. "Hibari, leave him alone."
Hibari stops, and gives her a cold glare. "Hana Kurokawa. I didn't know it was you."
She doesn't know what that means, and she doesn't try to answer it, instead sighing. "It's my fault, so don't 'bite him to death' or whatever it is you do." (If she'd thought about it, she'd think that she was being much too bold and much too daring.)
He stares at her for a long moment. It's a contemptuous stare, but also a curious one, and Hana wonders if no one else ever bothers to tell Hibari what to do. When she thinks about it, she realizes that it's extremely (to be ironic) likely that no one does.
"Hm," he says cryptically, "because it's your first time, I'll let you off with a warning."
He grabs her chin forcibly. Hana's afraid, but more of a fear that comes from making a fool of herself than from fear of actual danger. It's irrational, she knows, because he could snap her thin body like a twig if he wanted.
"No one tells me what to do."
"Noted."
Hana breathes sharply, all of a sudden very afraid he will hit her with those tonfa he always has. But he smirks, lets her go, and walks to the door. She sighs and returns to putting her head down in her arms, when a cold voice says, "Are you coming or not?"
She looks up and sees that he is waiting, impatiently. He makes a comment about how he doesn't have all day, and Hana barely suppresses a smile, before grabbing her jacket and her purse and bidding farewell to the (now terrified) bartender. When they slip out the door, Hibari mentions a police report.
"Just leave the poor guy alone," she says, but she's really thinking something else.
She's wondering why he's here.
Everybody's got a theory about the bitter one
They're saying momma never loved her much
And daddy never keeps in touch
That's she shies away from human affection
They're talking about him, the girls in the high school restroom, while they look in the mirror and apply lip gloss. Hana's washing her hands in the sink, and observing her reflection in the mirror, trying as hard as she can to distract herself from the topic at hand.
The girls are watching her, whispering behind their hands, and Hana cuts them a sharp glare so that they give up the pretense and say what they are thinking openly. One of the girls says something about whether she knows Hibari, if he's always so cruel, and naturally assumes she must know the answer.
It's because she's friends with Kyoko and Kyoko is friends with Tsunayoshi, and Tsunayoshi's friends are the only ones who seem to interact with him in an at all normal way, and she absolutely hates that. So she glares at them and tells them there's absolutely no reason she should know the answer, and it's the truth.
Then she leaves, and pretends not to hear them gossiping about what's biting her. Hana folds her arms across her chest- it's a clear indicator of how she's feeling, so the people in the hall stay away and she makes her way up to the roof, right where she knows he'll be, and sits down quietly.
Hibari doesn't so much as look her way, and his position doesn't change, but he does shut his eyes and make a small noise. Hana decides to take this as permission to talk. First of all, she thanks him, in curt and polite words.
He doesn't say anything except for "hn," but Hana can tell it's a it-was-nothing-just-don't-let-it-happen-again sort of 'hn.' And she doesn't bother to say anything in response.
Then she says, "They're gossiping about you down in the girls' bathroom."
He says, "What do I care about gossip?"
She shrugs and crosses her legs to sit and stare at the sky, until Hibari opens his eyes and says that class is starting and she'd better leave if she doesn't want him to bite her to death. So Hana leaves. (But later in the day, those three girls are admitted to the psychiatric ward of Namimori Hospital.)
She can't remember a time when she felt needed
If love was red then she was color-blind
All her friends, they've all been tried for treason
And other crimes that were never defined
Hana's scared that Ryohei Sasagawa is the only prince she's ever going to get, but in a very strange way she embraces the fact. They've grown up together and she knows him almost as well as Kyoko, almost better than anyone else, and she knows he'd always love her the best that he could figure out how to.
So she remains in that sort of half-in, half-out state where people generally take for granted that if they aren't a couple they'll be one soon and that they're absolutely in love. (She doesn't quite know if this is true.) But because she's afraid he's the only chance she'll get she tries to act like she loves him anyway, and knows she's a terrible person for it.
And maybe its guilt that drives her to hang on his every word. And when he says that she'd look cute with short hair, what does she do but run right away to chop it all off? And she doesn't even want to cut it, she hates the thought of short hair, of having her neck bared, of not being able to tie it back when she needs to.
She hates the finished product, too. It's an edgy and crisp hairstyle that suits her very much, but it's barely long enough to hit her chin and she also hates the complicity of her actions, how she runs to obey his words. She hates herself.
Ryohei loves it, of course, and just like he never does he can't see how much she hates it. If she wasn't so sick of herself and of her lying and her manipulating, Hana would have told him exactly what she thought, but she doesn't because she can't blame him.
When she meets him later to accompany him to an informal meeting of sorts, everyone comments on her new hairstyle and tells her that they love it, and Hana says that it's nothing really that great, she's just naturally beautiful, and then Hana excuses herself while Ryohei goes to engage in (rather loud) 'manly' chit-chat. She spots Hibari fairly easily and goes to lean on the wall near him, and it's quiet and peaceful again.
He doesn't mention her hair.
It shouldn't surprise her, but somehow, it does, and Hana revels in the silence for a moment. Then she decides that she really doesn't like the silence- it gives too much room for her guilty thoughts about Ryohei to grow. So she opens her mouth.
And blurts out; "I don't love that guy."
Hibari raises his eyebrows but doesn't say anything, and Hana's not sure what she expects anyway.
"And I hate this hair cut."
"Then it was stupid to get it." He yawns.
Hana smiles and looks down at the uncomfortable pointy black shoes on her feet and thinks about how true that is. "Yeah. Yeah. I thought it would make Ryohei happy."
"Hm?" It's an and-that-justifies it? sort of 'hm.'
"He's happy now, I guess. He said I'd look pretty with my hair like this." Then Hana stops dead. She realizes that she's spilling her guts to this guy, who probably doesn't want to hear anything and thinks she's an annoying bitch.
There's silence again, but this time Hana feels like it's a much easier silence. She feels like a weight's been lifted off her shoulders.
She sneaks a glance at Hibari, who, now that she thinks about it, is very pretty for a boy, and not that much taller than her. He's leaning against the wall; head tipped forward, eyes closed. He opens his eyes and looks right back at her.
"It seems like the idiot finally did something right, for once." Then he yawns again and meanders off into the crowd, sticking his hands in his pockets.
Hana wonders if that's his way of telling her that he likes it.
All of a sudden, she kind of likes the short hair herself.
She's saying that love is like a barren place
And reaching out for human faith
Is like a journey I just don't have a map for
So baby gonna take a dive, push the shift to overdrive
Send a signal that she's hanging all her hopes on the stars
She sits on the roof again and wonders how this became tradition, for her to join the prefect on the roof at the end of the day, during club activities. Hana wonders if Hibari even considers it to be routine, or if he merely tolerates her.
But he's always there, and Hana doesn't care if the reason is because he's simply indifferent.
This time, she really has nothing to say. He's lying on the concrete roof, staring at the clouds, and she leans against the door to the stairs and traces his gaze all the way up to the sky. And then her phone vibrates against her leg and Hana sighs. Hibari gives her a wordless glance.
It's a message from Ryohei, asking her to meet him after boxing practice so he can take her to get ice cream.
Hana tells Hibari what it says and then returns to silence, wishing that she could stay there in peace for just a little longer.
He takes a deep, resigned, breath, and Hana knows from experience that he's about to say something. She waits in polite silence, and it's not until then that she gets a response for her spontaneous declaration on non-love.
"If you don't love the idiot," he says slowly, "then you shouldn't act like you do."
He's only succeeded in making her feel terrible all over again.
"It's not that simple," she says, even though she really doesn't know why it isn't.
Hibari shrugs and makes a noncommittal sound. He sits in silence for a second, until Hana realizes what a really terribly non-answer of an answer it is. It's an excuse. She apologizes. "What I mean is that I don't want to hurt his feelings."
"You're Hana Kurokawa," says Hibari. He blinks, and then makes eye contact with her, making Hana still automatically. "You never care about hurting other peoples' feelings." (It's true.)
He's right, and she admits it aloud, and then Hana draws her knees up to rest her chin on them and waits to see if there's anything else he wants to say. But there's not, so she sighs and gets up. But Hibari grabs her, sitting up.
"Don't go."
She's going, even if only because she owes Kyoko and Ryohei. "Hmph, you don't have a right to tell me not to go."
"I do so," he says in annoyance. "I can tell you do whatever I want."
Hana smiles at the little hints of emotion in his voice. It's certainly not much and it's not positive at all, but Hana's encouraged. As much as she's encouraged though, she's also annoyed by the way he naturally orders her around. "Give me a reason, and I won't go," she challenges.
He pulls her down slightly and himself up, and gives her a look that makes Hana's heart thump in her ears. She wants a reason; she wants him to do something that will give her no choice but to stay, wants to know how much he actually cares. Hibari's breath is cool across her cheeks and she feels her chest tightening, but nothing happens- he lets her go.
Hibari lies back down, and a smirk crosses his lips, but nothing more is said. Hana waits for a minute, but she knows it's over, and- cheeks died red in indignation- she picks up her book bag and leaves.
But somewhere in a private place, she packs her bags for outer space
And now she's waiting for the right kind of pilot to come, and she'll say to him
I would fly to the moon and back if you'd be, if you'd be my baby
Got a ticket for a world where we all belong, so would you be my baby
She's sitting at the long bar in Takesushi with Ryohei and waiting for Takeshi Yamamoto to give them a plate of sushi, and she's trying to figure out exactly how she's supposed to tell Ryohei that she doesn't like him like that. Hana knows that they've never been officially together, but it feels like she's trying to break up, and about as hard too.
Hana nods and pretends to listen and taps her fingers on the table, hoping that her face doesn't show her thoughts. Even though she's eager for the torture to finally end, she's also apprehensive and maybe a bit angry.
He is stuck in her head and on her mind with his stupid half-smiles and 'reasons' that he wants her to make her status with Ryohei clear, and she's more than a little tempted to not do it, just to be the vindictive bitch she always is, but then she could never do that Ryohei. Not on purpose.
Ryohei reaches over and touches her hand and Hana pulls it back. Yamamoto sets two plates of sushi down in front of them, with a cheerful smile and an 'enjoy!'
She takes a bite, to calm her stomach and looks over at her companion, who's just shoved a piece of sushi way too big for one bite in his mouth, and she can't help but smile. Hana touches his shoulder and says; "Slow down, Ryohei."
He actually obeys, and puts the plate down and says something that sounds like 'sh shumin wong' but that she takes as "Is something wrong?"
Hana opens her mouth- she's going to say it- but then at the last second she chickens out and gives a weak excuse. "You're going to choke if you shove it all down your throat like that."
And that's that, and Ryohei takes another, smaller bite of sushi, but he looks rather dampened and neither of them is smiling, except for the idiot Takeshi Yamamoto, who seems to be avoiding their sad little bubble. And maybe it's Hana's imagination, but he's giving her a slightly disappointed look.
All of a sudden, Hana can't take it anymore. She stands up and slams her hands down on the table. "Ryohei, I-"
"Haha, Hibari?" Yamamoto smiles over Hana's shoulder, completely interrupting her anti-confession, and her skin goes white. "Are you here for sushi?"
She turns around, and sure enough, he's standing right there, his pretty storm-cloud grey eyes focused right on her. Hana gets up and points at him. "Why the hell are you here?"
"I figured you were doing a lousy job," he says nonchalantly, and Hana fumes- her face turns red- mostly because it's true that she is failing epically.
"That's none of your business-"
He approaches her fast and grabs her chin- Hana backs up, but it fails- and presses his lips to hers in a quick and hot impression of a kiss, and Hana's eyes widen and she drops her hand.
Then as quickly as he's kissed her, he's grabbing her arm and pulling her out of the sushi shop and onto the back of a motorcycle. And Hana's still practically in cardiac arrest, her heart pounding so loud she can hardly hear him when he orders her to wrap her arms around him.
Then they're speeding down the road, and Hana gets her wits back. "What the hell was that, Hibari?" she yells.
"Help," he calls back, and she sees the hint of a smile on his lips. "I thought you could use it."
She splutters then, because it's such a ridiculous and inadequate answer, but then she has to laugh because although she could kill him for that, she doesn't even want to.
"Where are we going?" she calls.
"Somewhere," he says cryptically, and it's more than enough.
Okay, so there? ^^ Haha, when I finished this, my computer had literally thirty seconds of charge left, and I had to rush to post it. xD But luckily, I went back today to fix it up. ^^
Hopefully you enjoyed! And by the way, guys- if you liked this, then write something for these two! D:{ I'd seriously love to be able to read something by another author.
REVIEW! Review for Hibari and Hana's love!
(Which is nonexistent...)