Falling, a ncis: los angeles fanfic

A/N Have given up on revising and have finally written another chapter for this story.

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS:LA (wish I did though)

Inspire by the song Falling by Florence and the Machine (which I don't own)

NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/ NCIS:LA/

Sometimes I wish for falling

Wish for the release

Wish for falling through the air

To give me some relief

Because falling's not the problem

When I'm falling I'm in peace

It's only when I hit the ground

It causes all the grief

It wasn't the first time that he had thought about doing this. He found himself standing here aged 11 four days after he had shot his dad; he just wanted to get away. He never thought about jumping, that wasn't an option then, he had his mum to live for. He found himself here again roughly 6 years ago after a horrible undercover case which lasted a very long 16 months, he stood at this ledge and thought about jumping, at this time he had nothing to live for. No family, his work colleagues hated him and he didn't really have any friends. He wondered if anyone would truly miss him, he wondered how long it would take for anyone to find him. Two weeks ago he would have hated that version of him if he had jumped. He would have never met Kensi, never worked at NCIS and never have any close friends that he could rely on.

But after the last two weeks he wasn't too sure anymore. He had finally let Kensi into the most important part of his life and all she had done was made fun of him in front of Sam and Callen. Every time he had let someone close to him they had let him down, Kensi was so important to him and it felt right, he never thought that this would be her response. After all she had gone on about opening up and telling her all about his past life, he didn't think she would do this to him.

He asked himself the same questions he asked 6 years ago; he still didn't have any family, his LAPD work colleagues hated him even more and only had a few friends. He thought about what he had done with his life, yes he had become a lawyer and a cop but that still didn't mean anything to him. He wanted something to live for, a family, a wife to come home to, a house to watch his children to grow up in, someone to care about and to have someone care about him. He thought Kensi was all of that, that connection that they had, although unspoken it was there and everyone knew even Nate who wasn't there half a time.

He walked slightly closer to the edge and looked down. Something about it looked so beautiful and peaceful. No more fighting, no more shooting, no more hatred just peace. He heard a voice from behind and turned around, Kensi was running towards him shouting at him not to jump, she was in an old set of joggers and had wet hair flowing in the wind. Don't jump she was just repeating, don't jump. He walked away from the edge and sat down. She sat down next to him shouting her head off at him; he turned around and saw Sam and Callen standing at the car. He got up, walked towards Kensi car and sat in the passenger seat, seatbelt on ready to go home. He didn't want to talk, he didn't want to shout or have an argument, he just wanted peace.