"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Spencer asks, wringing his hands.
"Why? You don't want me to sleepover?" I press myself to his chest, running my fingers up the length of his arm and locking eyes with the sweet doctor.
"I-I uh…It's not that I don't. I do. I really do. I just- uh…" Spencer rambles and stutters through an unmade excuse and I smile.
"Yes, I want to do this. Now let me into your apartment! My clothes are dying for a drawer!" I cry.
Spencer fumbles through his pocket for his key, almost throwing it over the railing of the staircase when he retrieves it. His hands shake ever so slightly as he pushes the key into the lock and turns the knob. The door slides open and I walk through the threshold. "I'm sorry about the mess," Spencer says as he steps in and locks the door behind him. He shuffles around the small apartment, picking up books and glasses in an attempt to straighten up.
"Well, I did kind of drop this on you." I walk into the middle of the room and take it all in. The walls are covered in a deep green with heavy curtains covering the large windows. The furniture was true leather that still looked brand new. "You sure you don't mind?" I run my fingers over his paper-strewn desk on the far right wall, then turn my attention to the wall of books on the left hand side of the room.
"I'm not going to say no to my girlfriend," I hear Spencer murmur behind me. I turn to find him standing with his hands in his pockets and the mask of nervousness that's almost permanently been etched onto his face since we've been together.
I smile and wrap my arms around his waist, resting my head on his rapidly beating heart. "You have a really nice place, Spencer."
"Thank you. It's more so just a place to sleep than anything else nowadays, considering how I'm almost never home. But I like it," he says as he looks around the room. "So, what do you want to do?"
"Got any good movies?"
"Um…I have Star Strek and Doctor Who…does that classify as good?"
"I've never seen them."
"Oh, I wish you didn't say that," he says as he bends down to turn on the TV.
"Why?"
"Because now I'm going to want you to watch all of it. And then I'm going to ramble on and on about it and have extremely long conversations with you about them and I'll corrupt your mind and you'll think I'm weird and you'll finally come to your senses and realize I'm just some weird nerd and you can do so much better and go off with some model or something," Spencer says as he sifts through some boxes on the very bottom of the bookshelf wall, picks one, and slides the DVD into the player.
I laugh. "Well, I don't know any models so I think your safe on that front. And I like rambling, nerdy guys. I find them quite attractive." Spencer blushes as he takes my suitcase into what I assume is the bedroom. When he returns, I've made myself comfortable on the couch with a blanket wrapped around my shoulders.
Spencer smiles at me and sets himself down a few inches away on the couch. I snuggle up into his side just as he presses play. I can feel him tense up under my weight, then relax and pull his arm around my back to rest at my hip.
At some point in the night, Spencer heated up some food for us to share. I fell asleep somewhere after the seventh episode, my eyelids too heavy to keep open any longer. I woke up again around 3 a.m., the bright lights from the TV invading my sleep.
I attempt to sit up without waking Spencer, but his eyelids flutter open at my slightest movement. He groans and stretches his long limbs. "What time is it?" he asks, squinting at the clock and reaching for his glasses.
"Around 3. Let's get to bed before we permanently contort ourselves into the shape of the couch," I laugh lightly, standing from the couch only to be pulled back down onto it.
"Uh…can you just...wait here? For a second?" Spencer asks.
"Why?" I yawn.
"Just…for a second. And then you can come in." He disappears behind the door and I stand from the couch. After turning off the television, I shuffle towards the bedroom.
"Come on, Spencer. I'm tired…" I whine. When I enter the room, Spencer whips around with fear etched into his face. He shoves his hands behind his back and stares at me.
"Please, don't," he whimpers.
"What's wrong? What are you hiding?" I take a step forward and Spencer winces, his back pressing against the wall.
"You'll laugh at me," he murmurs. His gaze meets the floor and he inches his way closer to his side-table by the bed.
"Sweetie, I would never laugh at you. You don't have to hide things from me. Just tell me what's going on."
Spencer eyes flit around the room before they finally land on me. He turns his head away as he pulls his hand out from behind his back to produce a smaller version of the Tardis from Doctor Who. "I'm afraid of the dark," I hear him breath just as I notice the small light bulb hidden behind the blue walls of the miniature phone booth.
"Strip."
Spencer's eyes dart over to mine and his eyebrows cinch together. "What?"
"Take your clothes off. Right now," I demand. I begin pulling off my top when Spencer's fingers grab my hands.
"Okay. I'm supposing the idea that I'm afraid of the dark isn't some wild fetish you have and that there's something else you have in mind that I'm not understanding. Before you start shedding layers, can you at least explain to me why?"
"I'm going to help you get over your fear of the dark. Skin to skin contact will help you relax. Come on, genius! Keep up!"
"That idea is solely based off of infants and their mothers. There's no proof that it would work with a 26-year-old man and his 23-year-old girlfriend!"
"Let's try it anyway," I whisper. I press myself closer to Spencer and curl my arms around his neck. I press gentle kisses along his jaw line, tracing down his throat and running my fingertips along the planes of his chest. I can hear his heartbeat quicken under his shirt and a deep sigh escape his lips. I plunge my hands beneath his shirt, pushing it up and over his head. "See? It's working already," I whisper against his skin.
"It's not dark and I'm anything but calm," he chuckles.
"All right, smarty. Go turn off the lights and take your pants off." I turn towards the bed and resume stripping down to my bra and panties. I can hear Spencer's sharp intake of breath as more of my skin is revealed. I climb up onto his bed and lean back against the pillows. "Go ahead. I'm right here," I smile.
Spencer stands by the door in just his boxers with one finger on the light switch. He takes a deep breath before turning the light off. The moment the light flickers to darkness, I feel Spencer's fingertip on my foot. I can just barely make out the shadow of him hanging over the end of the bed, reaching out for me. His fingers trail up my leg as he climbs onto the bed, his touch never once leaving my skin. He continues his path up my hip, along my side, and finally resting on my shoulder. His face is inches from mine when he stops, his breath sweet on my face.
"Good," I murmur. I tug at the sheets and he lifts his body up so I can pull them over the both of us. Spencer remains silent but his hand on my shoulder gives a small squeeze. "You okay sweetie?"
"Yeah…yeah. Okay. I…um…Are we going to have sex?"
"I wasn't planning on it. We can if you want."
"I don't think I'm ready just yet…is that okay?"
I smile and gently pull Spencer's forehead to mine. "It's absolutely okay. Do whatever's comfortable. I'll do whatever you need me to."
"Okay," he breathes. He tests out different positions to get comfortable. He starts with his head on my shoulder, then nuzzling into my neck, his back to me, spooning against me with his arms around my neck and torso before finding the space between my breasts to be pleasing. I can feel his fingers splaying over my stomach and his other arm curling underneath my back.
"Would you mind if I take this off?" I ask in reference to the bra currently keeping his cheek a measly millimeter away from the fullness of my breast. Spencer shakes his head and I slip the fabric off, letting it fall to the floor. Spencer hums against the newly exposed skin and I can feel a smile crawling onto his face. "How you feelin'?" I ask as I wrap my arms around his back.
"It's not so bad when you're here. I could definitely get used to this."
"I guess I'll have to sleep over more often," I muse as sleep begins gnawing at my brain. I run circles over Spencer's back until his breathing falls to a steady rhythm. Only then do I allow exhaustion to close my eyes and plunge me into sweet darkness.