Welcome home, Veronica. You've been sorely missed. It's funny. No one is lining up outside the office door to throw my welcome home party. I'm shocked. Nine years gone and you'd think someone would have rolled out the red carpet. I wasn't expecting a band, or anything, but confetti...at least confetti.
"What the hell, Veronica?"
"And a nice day to you, too, sir," Veronica answered with a sarcastic smile.
"Come on, V, you know I'm happy as hell to see you there, but I know what this means. And none of it's good."
"Wallace...don't start. If I get one more lecture about poor life choices, I just might get the itch to try this new taser in dad's drawer."
"Seriously, I don't get it. I knew Logan had this hold on you, but..."
"It's not just about Logan," Veronica protested.
"It's always about Logan. The two of you are more combustible than a can of gasoline over a hot flame. And Piz. Do you care at all how much you've hurt him?"
"Of course I do, Wallace. Don't you think it kills me to know he doesn't deserve this. He never deserved any of this. I never should have gotten involved with him. I guess part of me knew...part of me always knew..."
"So this is permanent? You're not going back to New York?"
"I can't leave my dad like this, Wallace. Even if Logan wasn't in the picture, my dad is still getting over the attack. I have to pitch in and help. He's in no shape to run the office, much less go chasing bounty jumpers."
"Ok, so you're dad gets better and back to 100%. What then?"
"I don't know what then, Wallace. It's not like I've mapped out a 5-year plan."
"See...therein lies the rub with you, V."
"Why can't you just be happy that I'm back? Aren't you happy I'm back?" Veronica asked, worried that one of the only friends she had left in the world was turning on her.
"Of course I'm happy you're back, V," Wallace reassured her. He walked over to her and put his arm around her shoulder. "I can't wait for you to see me...I mean my team...in action. It's just I'm worried about you. I'm worried about Piz."
Veronica sighed.
"I know, Wallace. I hate what I did to him. I know how bad I hurt him. I didn't mean to, Wallace. I never meant..."
"Ah, you never do, V. But shit happens around you, girl. It always has."
Veronica hung her head in shame.
"Wallace...I..."
"Look, Veronica," Wallace began, touching Veronica's shoulders, "I'm sorry. I know you feel bad about this. And I know you didn't mean for it to happen. It's Logan...The two of you..."
Wallace shook his head and dropped his hands to his side.
"Piz should have know, V. We all tried to tell him. He never had a shot."
"Don't say that, Wallace."
"It's true, V. Admit it. It's always been Logan. Always."
Veronica sighed again and looked up at the sky searching for an answer she already knew. She nodded.
"Yeah, Wallace. I think it has."
...
"Hey, there, Bond! It brings back old memories seeing you behind that desk."
"Hey, Mac. Did Wallace send you in for backup?" Veronica sighed.
"Wallace?" Mac asked, confused. "Oh...I see you've had a lecture from dad?"
"Yeah," Veronica exhaled. "I suppose I deserved it. I've made a bit of mess of all this."
Mac let out a snarky laugh and sat on the desk, facing Veronica.
"Veronica Mars making a mess? Well, that would be new and different," Mac smirked.
"Right?" Veronica laughed.
"You know that Wallace is happy as hell your back, right? Don't let him fool you. Of course, for Piz's sake, he has to give you the usual speech. I mean, it's Wallace. But he's glad you're here."
"Did he give you hell for taking a job at Kane software?"
Mac didn't answer, she just grinned.
"So why do I get all the grief?"
"Because that's just the way it is," Mac answered.
"Yay, me," Veronica smirked.
"So, tell me what havoc you are reeking now and who upon?"
"I've got to find a way to figure out what's going on with Lamb junior and how my dad got in the middle of it all. There's a huge cover-up going on here, Mac."
"Haven't you gotten yourself in the middle of enough murders here lately? How many times can you tempt fate, V?"
"Mac someone tried to kill my dad. That earned them an all-expense paid trip to kick-ass with me giving them the guided tour. I can't let this go," Veronica said, slamming her hand on the desk.
"Ok, ok. I get it, ," Mac said, motioning with her hands for Veronica to calm down. She stood up and faced her friend.
"What can I do to help?"
...
"Hey, beautiful," came the voice on the other end of the line.
Veronica collapsed onto the sofa.
"I don't think I've ever heard anything as wonderful as the sound of your voice right now," she sighed glad for her weekly call from Logan. He only called her once a week because the lines to use the sat phone were always long and most of the guys respected those with family issues or small children. Logan, having neither, limited his calls to Veronica to once a week. He emailed every day and sent a letter once every other week. It was the letters Veronica cherished the most because she knew it was so unlike Logan. It was her proof that he was different-that they were different.
"Long day?"
"Yeah, kind of." Veronica didn't want to drag up the details of her argument with Wallace or the absolute nowhere she had gotten with her dad's case and entire corruption scandal in general today.
"How's your dad?" Logan asked.
"Better. I just left the rehab facility. They say he might come home by the end of next week."
"That's great."
"It is. He is still pretty weak and is struggling to walk all by himself - he'll have to have a walker or cane or something for a while, but he's getting there. His jokes are back to normal."
"Corny and frequent?" Logan laughed.
"Yep," Veronica smiled.
"How are you?"
Veronica groaned. Having the time alone to process all that had happened in her life in the last few months was more than a bit overwhelming.
"Tired," was how she summed it all up to Logan. He was on a boat in the middle of who-freaking-knows-where-Pacific-ocean, so she wanted to keep it to synopsis-level if at all possible.
Logan smirked and shook his head.
"Veronica..."
"Logan..." she began before she got her second lecture for the day, "I have to go to New York this weekend."
She braced for his reaction. She thought about not even mentioning it. But that was the old Veronica. Truth mattered most of all now.
"The Bar?"
"Yeah, and..."
"Piz?" Logan finished.
"I have to pack up my stuff. I have to...I mean, it's not like I..."
"Veronica you don't have anything to explain to me. Hell, I feel pretty lousy myself. It's not like either of us planned this."
"Logan, what did you expect when you called me?"
"I...not..."
"No, Logan, I didn't mean that bad. It's just..." Veronica sighed. "I've been doing a lot of thinking here all alone. And, it's sort of been brought to my attention-that every decision I've made from the time I was sixteen has in some way revolved around Logan Echolls. I mean, I denied that for a long time, but when it's just you, the ramen, the walls, and the mice - you have some pretty interesting introspective discussions with yourself."
Logan remained silent.
"It's true, Logan. It's always been about you. Nine years ago I thought it was about me. I thought I was moving on with my life, but that's not what that was. I was running. I was running away from you. I was running because I was afraid that if I stayed and faced up to the facts of my life that I've have to admit to myself and everyone else in the world who I really am. Strip away the Stanford education, the fancy pants suit, the law degree - at the end of the day I'm just a screwed up girl from a small California town who has always been in love with Logan Echolls."
Logan was speechless. He swallowed hard and tried to find the words.
"Veronica, you are so much more..."
"I know, Logan, but it's only that that matters really. And admitting it to myself is the first step to being anyone else."
"Well, shit, Veronica. I don't have a reply for that."
"You don't have to."
"I kind of think I do," Logan said, feeling as if everything in his world just turned upside down.
"I'm just trying to being honest, Logan. We haven't always done that very well."
"Yeah, well, I wasn't really prepared for that much honesty halfway out in the Pacific," Logan laughed.
"Shit, I'm sorry, Logan. I was really trying to avoid dumping all this on you now..." Veronica apologized.
"Hey-don't apologize. This is kind of nice. This kind of makes me feel-normal. I feel like my buddy Joe. He's got a wife and two kids and he spends half his time on the phone refereeing the two of them."
Veronica laughed.
"It feels..." Logan searched for the right word. "I don't know-good. It feels like, all the way out here in the middle of the ocean, that we're not that far apart, after all."
Veronica smiled.
"So-the bar?" Logan asked, changing the subject. "You're going through with it?"
"Might as well. I mean, I've already paid for it. I graduated law school. It sort of seems like a logical next step," Veronica joked, her smart-ass wit indicating their little moment of deep emotion had passed for now.
"And then what?" Logan asked.
"I don't know, Logan. Just one day at a time, remember?"
"Ok. Just one day at a time." He smiled, hoping Veronica would sense it on the other end of the line. "Say hi to Piz for me?"
"Umm..."
"Too soon?"
"A bit," she smiled.
"I miss you, Veronica," he countered.
She swallowed hard. She knew what he really meant. He was still afraid to say it.
She was, too.
"I miss you, too, Logan," she said softly.