Disclaimer: Wow, if I owned POTC…I would've drowned it with Norribeth…or even Sparrowbeth…heck, even Beckabeth.
Story: Elizabeth finds What if's too much to bear and wishes that if she could, she would want things to be different from the first time around.
Set after AWE.
Spoilers: For all three movies.
Pairings: Norribeth [Norrington/Elizabeth
Warnings: Not sure…
"I've learned to take the good and bad, and breathe." –Vanesssa Hudgens, Whatever Will Be
My Almost Lover
Chapter One: If We Could Turn Back Time
"Our destinies have been entwined, Elizabeth…but never joined," a moment of hesitation crossed him before he suddenly leaned forward and surprised her with a kiss.
With that, James Norrington urged her onto the rope and out of his life.
Horribly aching and filled with sorrow, Elizabeth watched with horror-filled eyes as Bootstrap ran James through and her oldest friend in Port Royal suddenly collapsed against the railings, blood seeping out everywhere.
Elizabeth screamed in terror and then felt water suddenly dragging her down. She struggled against the currents and the memory of what had just occurred.
Feeling tears slip out and join the oceanic waters, Elizabeth prayed.
'Please God…I wish I would just go back and never have let James let me go. I wish I had just accepted his proposal. If I could just…
'I'm sorry.'
Elizabeth let her vision turn black and she knew no more.
When she next awoke, she found herself in a vaguely familiar cabin. How it was familiar, she couldn't recall. She stood up and left it, walking through until she reached the deck. She drifted like a ghost towards a familiar figure, wig absent. But it couldn't be! He died just before her eyes.
"James?" she murmured aloud, thinking herself in a dream.
He whirled around and she was met with startled green eyes. Alive green eyes.
"J-James?" and without being able to control herself, Elizabeth began to cry.
He hurried towards her, looking confused, but so very alive. When he put his arms around her, she grasp at him, trying to make sure he wasn't an illusion.
"Miss Swann, are you alright?"
James, sweet James. She'd forgotten his hair was brown, only remembering she'd seen it at Tortuga and his time as deckhand onboard the Pearl. And his eyes…
"You're alive," she sniffled.
James smiled, but confused, "Of course, Miss Swann. I'll take you to your cabin, okay?"
He gently led her by the arm, and she felt herself returning to normal. Then her mind tried to piece together what had happened. For she was sure she had seen James' death and now she wasn't sure if she was onboard the Flying Dutchman, the Empress, or even the Black Pearl.
They'd reach the cabin and James awkwardly opened it, hesitating before pushing her gently inside and following to tuck her in.
"James, why are you taller than me?" Elizabeth sleepily asked. James had been taller than her, she knew, but right now he was towering over her.
"Miss Swann, I think you should go back to sleep."
Elizabeth started to glare a little, before she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror.
Her mouth opened into an o, a silent scream, and then she fainted.
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Elizabeth wouldn't come out of the cabin for hours after that, missing breakfast, brunch, and lunch. She sat huddled in disbelief on her bed, wondering how this had happened and what was happening.
She was onboard the Dauntless as a twelve year old.
They had barely set sail, the second day in fact, and James didn't know her at all. It felt horrible and she knew she would have to refrain from calling him James or risk confusing him even more. First confusing him about being upset and out on deck in the middle of the night and then saying 'he's alive' when he certainly would be at this point in time. How crazed she must seem!
"Miss Swann? Are you alright in there? Your father is very worried and wishes you'd come to eat dinner," James' voice echoed through her door.
She scowled and contemplated whether she should answer or leave him to silence. Sighing irritably, she softened when she remembered this was James who she had led to his death and guilt began to niggle at her a little.
"In here, J –…Lieutenant Norrington," she said dully, inviting him in. He slipped in, holding two bowls of porridge.
"Sorry it isn't much, at least not what you're used to I'm sure…but it's all the ship has in stock," he murmured quietly.
She nodded and unfolded her knees out in front of her, patting the spot next to her on the bed. He hesitated before complying with her wishes, and Elizabeth felt a rush of happiness go through her.
"If you don't mind too much, I brought my own food with me. Thought you'd like the company," James's lips quirked up a little, and Elizabeth remembered how easy she and James used to talk before he kept getting promoted.
"I don't mind at all, Lieutenant," Elizabeth smiled, unhappy about using his title.
"Just James. It still feels a little odd having myself addressed like that by everyone. It wasn't really that long ago I became lieutenant. I'd say around two years ago."
Elizabeth felt proud. She remembered that James had always been quick to be promoted and that he'd always earned those promotions. Not only that, but she was happy that she did not have to go on much longer calling him Lieutenant Norrington.
"Then I insist I am called Elizabeth," she bartered teasingly.
"Then it is Elizabeth," he fully smiled before ducking his head bashfully and starting to eat out of his bowl. She took her own bowl and started to eat, and they sat in a companionable silence.
"I must go now, Elizabeth. I shall see you later," he said as he took her bowl and bowed out.
"Thank you for checking up on me and keeping me company, James," she called out.
His response was one more of those rare smiles.
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Elizabeth checked herself in the mirror, wishing she wasn't so small or so young. She wanted to be at her original age, which would make grabbing James' attention easier. At least, in the way she was thinking of.
She held her fingers to her lips, remembering that bittersweet kiss that he had given her before his death. Remembering the awful memory that still seemed so clear to her, she wept bitter tears that were as bitter as that kiss.
"Elizabeth? Is it alright that I can come in?" James asked from the other side of her door.
She quickly wiped her eyes and gave her assent, trying to compose herself to near perfection.
"You look a right mess. Have you been crying, Elizabeth?" James asked kindly, watching her as she tried to refute his claim.
"No," she pouted. Damn, she was even starting to act like a child.
He laughed a little and ruffled her hair. "It's alright to be homesick. I miss England sometimes as well."
"James," she said quietly, feeling unable to push aside the guilt as she kept picturing the man before her dying. "Would you ever be able to blame me for anything?"
"What an odd question! Blame you? I don't think I ever could, Elizabeth."
'I broke your heart, James. Didn't you ever blame me for that?' Elizabeth thought with a bit of self-loathing.
"Now enough of that! Come with me. Keep me company out as I run the night watch. I'll try to teach you a bit of the sea at the same time, shall I?"
"Alright then. I'll come if it's what you really want."
As selfish as she thought it was, she couldn't help but feel a bit less unhappy when James said he would never blame her and that he wanted her company.
She followed him out, keeping to herself and letting him say something small every now and then to break the silence.
"We'll stop here, Elizabeth," James said, and Elizabeth saw that they had stopped at the bow. "See out there, Elizabeth? That sea encompasses all around us, beautiful and terrifying at the same time."
Elizabeth gazed in awe at him, never once remembering if she had ever heard him speak that way. Perhaps, long ago, when they were like this. Lieutenant and spoilt Governor's daughter.
"Just like you," James suddenly teased, ruffling her hair.
She huffed and swatted at his hand, "Of course not!"
"But I'm right, you see. You're a beautiful little thing that terrifies all the officers here onboard," James said in mock seriousness, causing Elizabeth to squeal in anger and try tackling him. She really had immediately grown into the role of a child easily. She couldn't wait to be older.
James laughed loudly, catching her and swinging her in a full-circle before setting her down in front of him and right up into the railing. Bending his knees a little, he leaned closer to her and placed his cheek near hers.
"I love the sea, but I hope you won't be exactly like it. The sea is fierce, beautiful and untamable alright. But I also said it was terrifying and dangerous. If you wanted to be free-spirited and untamed, be like the wind and not the sea," she could feel the side of his face move into a smile.
She drew back and slapped his shoulder.
"I'm going to be the sea," she declared defiantly before softening with her next words. "But you're going to be the wind. Because the wind is the only one who is truly free, and the only one who can tame the wildness of the sea. The wind calms and guides the sea, and it also provokes it. The two go together," she hinted.
James smiled endearingly at her, "And how very wise words they are, Elizabeth –"
"And very much perfect child's logic!" her father appeared behind them, laughing boisterously. "Quite fitting coming from a child, my child no less."
James straightened up, "Good evening, Governor Swann. I was just letting Elizabeth see the sea's worth from a seaman's point of view."
"Very good. I hope she hasn't given you too much trouble, Lieutenant Norrington," Governor Swann led James a little ways away, leaving Elizabeth frustrated and irritated. Now James will think her words childish and her a child; pay no mind to both!
She looked back out to sea and gasped. For there was a small hint of smoke in the horizon and fog was starting to become a little heavy around them.
That was right. It was around this time that Will came into her life, and with him piracy.
She didn't want things to repeat, but there were some things that she didn't want changed.
She resentfully twisted her lips up and sang.
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Elizabeth stared down at Will, looking at the medallion. She hesitated. Did she really want to take the medallion? It had caused her and everyone else a whole load of trouble. But she probably would never meet Jack or any of the others.
Sighing, she decided that maybe she shouldn't take it this time around. What was the purpose of going back to change things when she was about to repeat things?
"What's that, Elizabeth? Has the boy awakened yet?" James appeared behind her and she felt her heart sinking. She did not want him to imprison Will.
Elizabeth tried to block his view, but he had already caught sight of the medallion and so she settled down beside him. She stayed still and quiet, waiting for James to say something.
"He says his name is William Turner," she said suddenly, wondering why he had been silent up to that point.
James leaned over Will and took the medallion, stuffing it inside his frock uniform.
"I know, Elizabeth. I'll keep it safe, okay?" James looked into her eyes and she knew he understood that she didn't want Will to be hurt.
"James, I'm sleepy. Can you take me to bed?" she yawned, and Elizabeth realized it was so much easier to act a child than she thought. It was all buried instincts and she was easily a child without even trying. And yet all the wisdom she did have from before would now be taken as child's logic! How frustrating…
"Alright then. Let me just have someone take Mr. Turner into an open cabin."
But she did love being a child, so maybe it wouldn't be so bad being up to her old tricks again.
"You, James, are a hooligan," Elizabeth flicked his shoulder.
"Of course. And you are a brat."
Elizabeth gasped through her sleepiness, awakening a little. She tried to hit him, but he evaded with a chuckle and ran away with her running after him.
She didn't remember James' childish side. She only remembered the side that was like it, but jaded.
Not again.
Started 9/24/07 –Completed 9/28/07
What if Elizabeth had a second chance?
What if Elizabeth hadn't of taken the medallion?
What if James took it?