" Fine, as you wish Yagami Raito. I will kill L for you, it really makes no diference, he is just another human to me. " – Rem said and my heart almost stopped, my mind went completely blank. This is what I wanted, this is what I should want so why does just the thought of not being able to see or hear L anymore makes my chest tighten and why do I suddenly found it hard to breathe?
Have I fallen in love with L without realizing it? Impossible… the fact that he is a man is not even the problem, the problem is that L is Kira's worst enemy and I am Kira!
Pull yourself together Raito, you're smarter than this, don't let your heart control you, use your head like you've been doing all along and everything will be fine.
Remember your goal, you want to build a perfect world and you want to be the god to that world, a first love is nothing compared to that.
I must be tired, one good night of sleep is going to put all this nonsense out of my mind.
(At the new building)
I arrive at the new building and I see Watari, my father and Matsuda-san looking at the screens. I couldn't help but notice that Ryuzaki isn't here, usually I would find him eating all kinds of sweets and drinking coffee with crazy amounts of sugar, to be honest I find that side of him really cute.
Cute?! What am I doing? I must be going crazy, that's the only explanation to why I would think something like that.
I have to find him so that I can prove to myself that these feelings are all wrong.
"Where is Ryuzaki? I need to speak with him, it's important. "
"What's the matter Yagami-kun? Everything ok? Should we worry? "answered Matsuda-san with a panicked tone in his voice.
"No, I'll talk with you later, do you know where he is? "
"He went upstairs. "
"Thank you. "Before I noticed I was already in front of his room, I knocked but no one answered, where is he? The rooftop! If he didn't leave the building, he has to be there.
Even though I know that my duty as Kira should be at the top of my priorities, I can't stop thinking about him.
As soon as I'm opening the door that gives access to the rooftop I see Ryuzaki standing in the rain, why is he here? Something doesn't feel right.
I approach him because I doubt he could hear me with all this noise.
"What are you doing out here Ryuzaki? You're going to catch a cold. "While I'm saying these words I feel the urge to strip my jacket and put it on top of his shoulders but I immediately brush off the thought from my head.
"Oh, Raito-kun, I was just thinking of how anything makes sense anymore. " I understand right away that he is talking about Kira's case but we are drenched and all I can think about is getting Ryuzaki out of this heavy rain.
"Come on, let's go back inside, we can talk in your room. "
"Yes. "
(In the Room)
This is bad, his room smells like him, so sweet. I can't even think straight.
"Raito-kun, you can use some of my clothes while yours dry. " He gives me a towel and a change of clothes. I need to get out of this room.
"I'm going to change in the bathroom, then I'll makes us a cup of tea. " I almost run to the bathroom and I close the door behind me when I hear Ryuzaki shouting.
"Coffee for me, please. " I had a feeling he would say that.
I leave the bathroom and I see him sitting next to the fireplace trying to light it.
"Let me guess, and a slice of strawberry cake? "
"You know me rather well, Raito-kun. " I peeked through the corner of my eye and I saw Ryuzaki grinning for the first time.
At that moment I felt my heart throbbing madly, I could feel my cheeks burning up and the desire to push him down and make love to him growing, I wanted to make him mine right there in the carpet in front of the fireplace.
I have to calm down, I should be convincing myself that being in love with him is madness and not otherwise.
I went to the kitchen to prepare my tea, his coffee and two slices of strawberry cake, one for me, maybe eating something sweet is going to help me preserve my sanity.
When I came back to the living room I left the food on the small table near him and sat at the opposite side.
"So, do you want to tell me what was that all about? " I asked, trying not to let my thoughts travel to dangerous places.
"I don't know if I should. " It was then that I notice that his hair was still dripping wet. I stood up and grabbed the towel that was sitting on top of the couch, I unfolded and brushed it on Ryuzaki's forehead.
"You're are still soaked. " My hand moved the towel to wipe his cheeks and then his jaw line. He looked up at me with his big eyes and his lips were just begging to be kissed, his face was leaning against my hand, he looked eager for something and this situation was destroying my self-control bit by bit.