Daria and the show's associated characters are the property of MTV/Viacom. This is fanfic and no money was exhanged for this story. It's merely written for fun and non-profit.

A Little Vacation

by

Doggieboy80

1. Transporter

"O.K., why did you skip out of class?" Daria Morgendorffer asked as she and her best friend, Jane Lane, walked down the street.

"Ah...Ms. Li had me in the office for awhile," Jane replied, her expression blank.

Daria stared at her silently for several seconds as they walked, then smirked. "Let me guess," she said, "she found hidden porn in your locker."

"No, that was last year."

"You painted small smiley faces on the security cameras' lenses?"

Jane stopped and thought about that. "No, but that's a good idea," she said and smiled at her best friend. "Thanks, amiga."

"Well, are you going to keep me in suspense all day? Just tell me what happened."

The tall brunette said nothing for several seconds, then said, "Ms. Li wants me to create a poster for the Lawndale Chamber of Commerce. You know, something that sells the community, but doesn't cost them anything, except all the brownie points Li earns. I'd get extra credit to use where I'd need it."

Daria adjusted her book bag and smirked again. "I'd like to sell the community."

"Yeah, but where would you spend the half-dollar?"

They passed a utility pole with a small poster attached. Daria stopped, walked back and looked at it. A picture of an elementary school age Black boy with the words MISSING printed above it centered the paper. The rest of the message identified the boy as Billy Smithson, age 9, and gave details about him and the Lawndale Police Department.

"What's up, Daria?" Jane asked. "Do you know him?"

"I've seen him before," the auburn-haired girl said as she pointed at the poster. "He came to our house last year selling popcorn for the Cub Scouts. He got Dad going on one of his rants and, as a result, also got Dad to buy 50 bucks worth of popcorn." She shook her head. "It says here that he disappeared while coming home from school three weeks ago."

"Remember that realtor who always made those commercials on Channel Four?" Jane asked. "The one who always tried to show too much of her boobs? She's missing, too."

Daria glanced at Jane. "I heard Mom say something about some shady deals that realtor had. I'm not surprised she disappeared."

They walked on down the street. "So what do we do today?" Jane asked. "Get a pizza and watch Sick, Sad World? Or do we try to watch the soft-core porn on Cinemax through the squiggly lines again?"

"Not that again," Daria replied. "Not only did I get a headache, but you fell asleep and loudly fantasized about Alan Thicke. I nearly lost my pizza when you went into detail about what you wanted to do to him."

"No, it wasn't Alan Thicke! It was Leonardo DiCaprio!"

"Oh, that's right. You fantasized about Thicke when you fell asleep in O'Neill's class."

"Keep it up, Daria, and I'll tell everyone about the love letters you wrote to Don Knotts."

Daria decided to play along. "It's just that Mayberry charm. That's my weakness."

"That and seeing Trent in his underwear."

"I hate you, Lane." Daria blushed and looked away.

Jane smiled at her friend and they walked on down the street in silence. Finally, she said, "There's no harm in liking him, Daria."

Daria grunted, but said nothing.

"You ought to ask him out."

"What? Are you nuts?"

"Hear me out, Daria, hear me out. He's ambling around, clueless as ever. You ask him and if he says 'Yes', then you work on it from there."

"Well, suppose he says 'No', smart ass. What then?"

"Then you can chase after Mack instead." Jane grinned at her. "Seriously, if Trent turned you down, then you let him go and pursue someone else. It would be his loss, anyway."

Daria sighed, looked down briefly, then looked back up at Jane. "It's not that easy, Jane. You're more outgoing than I am."

Jane looked ahead. "Well, speak of the devil. There's Trent. Lift your skirt up, Daria. Show him some thigh."

"Bend over, Jane. You have something on your ass."

Jane laughed and moved slightly out of reach. "I've heard that one before. Let's at least say 'hi' to him and find out why he's awake." She lifted her hand to wave at him.

Just then, a tall, skinny man with a fringe of white hair and bulging eyes jumped out from behind a parked panel van. He carried a black box the size of a trumpet case and pushed something on the front. The sound of thunder could be heard as a white light shot out from the box towards the girls.

"Daria! Look out!" Jane jumped aside quickly.

Daria wasn't as quick, however. The light engulfed her and she cried out loudly in shock as she vanished in the bright luminescence.

The light faded and Daria Morgendorffer was gone.

(To be continued...)