Title: Doubts ( 1/1 )
Written by Ruine
Dedicated to Holo
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy XIII, original cast and storyline, belong to Square-Enix Company, Limited & Tetsuya Nomura. No copyright infringement intended. This work was made solely for pleasure and no profit was ever gained in its distribution.
Character(s): Lightning Farron, Serah Farron
Pairing(s): Serah + Light (platonic), Snow x Serah, Possible Future Light x Hope (Implied)
Warning(s): Random, Spoilers for Lightning's Real Name
Status: Edited, Beta'ed by Holo (Thanks, Holo!), Complete
Rating: PG-13, Family/Comfort/Humor, Slight Romance
Summary: Lightning has some lingering doubts about her younger sister's upcoming wedding. Serah straightens her out.
Word Count: 2,164
Timeline: Ten months after the beginning of the game.
LAST REVISION: 21 JULY 2012. Corrected some grammatical errors, changed the format of my fanfiction.
[ 1 ]
"You're having doubts."
Lightning Farron didn't even twitch, remaining perfectly calm and unfazed at the abrupt intrusion. She took a sip of hot tea from the mug in her hand, rolling the bitter liquid in her mouth and swallowing, before finally murmuring. "Yes."
"I have absolutely no doubts whatsoever." Serah's voice carried no hesitation, no matter how carefully Lightning listened. "I've never been so sure of anything in my life."
I'm glad one of us is confident, Lightning mused but did not voice her thoughts aloud.
She heard the soft shuffle of slippers and her younger sister slid onto the couch beside her; the soldier immediately noticed the mug in Serah's own hands. Catching a whiff of stream trailing from the container, the soldier noted that while her cup held green tea, Serah had chosen a mint-flavored concoction; topped with several teaspoons worth of honey. Just like them, really, reflecting their natures.
Her sister was sweet, refreshing and soothing.
She was bitter, hard and unyielding.
"Hasn't Snow proven himself by now?"
"It isn't a matter of proof."
Serah blew out an exasperated sigh, the steam from her drink swirling around her troubled features. "Then, why the doubts? You told him you believed him; you even congratulated us! Please, don't tell me you were lying to him, Claire."
Lighting closed her eyes. Serah waited patiently, allowing the silence to stretch out comfortably between them and for her older sister to sort out her thoughts and feelings. This had to be resolved, the younger Farron vowed. She was going to be married in less than two months and Serah wanted Lightning to let go of her without any worries or reservations.
Lightning released a long deep breath, and opened her eyes to gaze out the window of their small home; the moon was new so only countless stars littered the sable sky. "I can't quite explain it," she confessed with clear frustration and well-concealed anxiety. "It does seem irrational but I feel that . . . that despite everything that's happened and what he's done for you, I'm afraid he'll fail and you'll suffer for it, Serah. That, in ten years, you'll only have regrets."
"He won't!" Serah shook her head vehemently. "Snow didn't fail me before, and he won't now. Especially now."
"You're . . . probably right," Lightning whispered, "that's why I'm so troubled. He never failed you. I did."
"No," Serah growled, the guttural sound so out of place in her usually gentle voice. "You didn't fail me either! How could you even say that?"
"Yes, I did!" Lightning snapped back and her hands tightened around her mug, the hot tea inside sloshing and nearly spilling onto her fingers. "I didn't listen when you told me that you had been turned into an l'Cie. I chased you away, I shut you out. Hell, I threatened you!" her voice grounded to a halt, choked by the shame and anguish she had been holding inside of her since the beginning of the entire ordeal." . . . I didn't trust you."
Serah stared at her, taking in Lightning's distraught face. It hurt; seeing her sister like this. The sight caused her to close her eyes briefly before opening them. Her own heart echoed her sister's agony. Claire suffered so much for her, because of her. Sometimes, Serah felt that she didn't deserve such a wonderful sister. She had to fix this, she had to heal all of those wounds. She was the only one who could and the only one who should; she had caused all of them after all. She, and her selfishness.
"Alright. Yes, you failed me . . . "
Seeing the normally stoic woman flinch and look away, Serah reached across the short distance and took Lightning's half-filled mug from her hands. They shook faintly, a clear sign of her sister's distress. Serah set both mugs onto the nearby coffee table. Then, swiftly, she caught and cradled her older sibling's hands in hers. Squeezing them tightly as Serah leaned close, fingers intertwining, she found comfort in the familiar calluses pressing into her own smooth palms. "But, I failed you first."
Lightning's head jerked up to meet her gaze, disbelieving and bewildered.
"I didn't trust you either," Serah admitted softly. "The instant I was turned into a l'Cie I should have told you about it as soon as I could. Because, after what you've done for me, what you gave up just so I could live the way I have for the past six years; you deserved to be the first person I told and the first person I turned to. But, I didn't!" she blinked, feeling tears prickle at the corner of her eyes. "And, it brought you so much grief. You've got the most right to hear this from me, I owe you so much more and this is all I can do so far . . . I'm so sorry, Claire. I'm so very sorry. Please, forgive me." She bowed her head, pressing her forehead to their joined hands.
Lightning freed herself from the now loose hold and pulled her younger sister into a tight embrace, one Serah eagerly returned; her cheek resting on Lightning's firm shoulder while Lighting dropped a kiss onto Serah's strawberry-hued locks. "I'm sorry too. And it's over now, Serah, I never blamed you for not telling me. But, if you feel you need to hear me forgive you then I forgive you."
"Thank you." Serah whispered, hugging her tightly, almost desperately. "And, for me, there's nothing to forgive too. In fact, I kind of deserved your words."
Lightning shook her head, her cheek rubbing into her little sister's soft hair. "No one deserves to be told by her family they're an enemy."
"No, not that part. You've already apologized for that. Actually, I was being ungodly selfish and thoughtless on your birthday."
"Oh, why so?" Lightning sounded amused and exasperated.
"The fact that I waited to tell you on your birthday," Serah pulled away slightly to look up at her earnest and contrite. "That day shouldn't have been about me or my problem in being branded or about my engagement to Snow. It should have been all about you; I should have told you some other day. In fact, I should have told you days before your birthday. You told me it was your worst birthday ever, and you're right."
"Good point there." Lightning conceded with a mix of wry mirth and ruefulness. "Well, the last part is easily fixed, just make it up to me on my next birthday. It isn't that far off now and we'll call it even."
"Oh yes, I will!" Serah brightened considerably. "I'll make your 22nd birthday the best one yet and all following birthdays afterward."
Lightning smiled and kissed her on the temple now. "Then, that's it."
"Yeah." Serah nodded decisively. "Now that's all cleared up, I want you to put all of this behind you," she insisted with surprising fierceness, her blue eyes were wet but no tears fell. Lightning once more recalled how much inner strength her sister held; it rivaled hers after all. Serah continued steadily. "We both failed each other, and now we've got the chance to make up and do better. To do it right this time around; that's all that really matters in the end."
Lightning's smile widened, only a pale mirror next to her younger sister's wide grin but no less poignant, and she nodded. "Right."
"You know," Serah suddenly giggled. "I just realized that this makes Snow better than either of us! I mean, since he didn't fail to deliver and he's never broken either of our trusts in him . . . "
The soldier snorted. "Not a pleasant thought, Serah. Probably true, in a certain point of view, but really far from pleasant to think about. That's not something I want to go to bed with."
"Fine," Serah pouted. "You should be nicer to my husband-to-be. He has so many wonderful traits!"
"No promises, Serah. Sure, he can be trusted but he's still an idiot most of the time."
"Only to you, Light. He's my hero."
"Brains aren't part of a Hero's 'traits', apparently."
"Hush you!" Serah pulled away completely and swatted her sister on the arm, crossing her arms. "Oh fine, I'll change the subject to something more enjoyable. I don't like hearing you diss my Snow."
Lightning was so tempted to retort but just stopped herself at the look on her sister's face. She was treading on dangerous ground. "Thank you."
"So, any possible someone for you?" Serah smirked. "I still wish we could have a double wedding. Though, from what I've seen of your possible love life, I don't want to wait that long for you."
"Oh no, this is not a conversation I am going to have with you; change the subject right now," Lightning ordered gruffly, crossing her arms and fixing her sister with a hard, knowing look. "You specifically picked this topic to get back at me, didn't you? And what do you mean my 'possible love life'? I have no one I'm remotely interested in. Wipe that smirk off your face, it's downright wrong; don't you dare try to match me with anyone. Do you hear me, Serah Farron? I am absolutely serious. I have no one and I do not want anyone! I don't need you sticking your nose into my love life or lack of it."
"Aw, but matchmaking is fun and I only want you to be happy! Besides, it isn't like you don't have any good prospects."
"Really, none comes to mind off the top of my head. Give me one as you claim I have so many."
". . ."
Lightning looked smug.
" . . . in four years, you'd have a really good one."
The soldier leveled a bland look of puzzlement at her sister. "Who?"
"Hope, of course." Serah took perverse satisfaction in the way her sister spluttered.
"W-what?"
"I'm serious," Serah replied. "He's already rather mature, really sweet, as brave as my Snow, devoted, smart and, you'd have to be blind to disagree, he's very handsome. Heck, I'd even say beautiful; he's prettier than some girls I know!" She sighed dreamily. Lightning felt an odd mix of feelings circling her chest as she watched her little sister gush. "Can you just imagine what he'd look like and be like in four years? If I didn't have Snow, I'd snatch him up in an instant!"
Silently, Lightning agreed with her sister that Hope was certainly all of those things, however . . . "Too bad you have Snow, then," she quipped. "If you ask me, Hope would be a much better match for you. At least, I know he can take care of you and would have a good paying job by the time he does court you. He's as good a student as you are if what I hear from his dad is true."
"Aha!" Serah crowed triumphantly; leveling a finger at her. "See, he already meets your hard-won approval and stringent standards! Since I'm taken, you should get him! Really, Light, you can't pass up this chance. All great men are either gay, married, taken or dead! Luckily, you caught this one so young. You seriously can't let him get away from you!"
" . . . Sometimes, your logic frightens me, Serah." Lightning muttered, rising. "On that note, I am going to bed, and so should you. We have a busy day tomorrow; there are still so many arrangements to be made for your wedding."
"Just give it some more thought," Serah insisted. "you've still got four years and I know this is exactly what you need!"
Lightning merely ignored her younger sibling and strode briskly towards the short hallway at the back of their residence.
Impishly, Serah called after her. "Though, you better watch out; he'll have girls swarming all over him in no time."
"Whatever." Lightning tossed over her shoulder as she reached the door leading into her bedroom. That's what this gunblade is for . . . Holy shit, I didn't just think that. No, it's just my protective side; I just don't want Hope ending up with the wrong kind of girl. He is important to me after all . . . I cannot be thinking about this! Damn you, Serah, this is all your fault! It's definitely time for bed. I'm just sleepy, that's why random thoughts are getting loose inside my head. [1]
Determinedly, Lightning entered and closed the door firmly behind her.
The End.
[1] Yes, Serah would sow the seed. I think Lightning forgets her sister can be as protective and as cunning as her and most likely just wants nothing more than seeing her beloved older sister happy and cared for just like she is. Naturally, that involves a man in her books.