"Do you ever wonder?" Annabeth asked. It was late into the evening, she and Percy were sprawled out on the grass. Stargazing on Half-Blood Hill, right next to Thalia's tree.
"Wonder about what?" Percy's words came out lazy, slow and drawn. He was looking for Zoë's constellation, because it was the only one he could find without Annabeth's help, and he hadn't wanted to ruin the moment by talking.
Annabeth turned and looked at him. Her wide gray eyes glittered in the moonlight, and Percy smiled offhandedly. She smiled back, the usual radiant smile she saved just for him. "About," she paused her fingernails trailing ever so lightly against his face. "About Nico di Angelo. Where he went, I mean."
"Oh." That was a weird thing to bring up. Especially right now in such an intimate, intense kind of moment. Percy wasn't even sure how to respond. Not because he never wondered about where Nico di Angelo had disappeared after the Giant War— because he actually thought about it a lot— he was just caught off guard. Finally he shrugged. "I guess so." He replied, his words more passive than his thoughts. "Why?"
"It's stupid," Annabeth said, turning to look at the sky again. Her eyes traced the stars, like she could point out every detail even if she were blindfolded (which she probably could). "I just, I don't know, I worry about him, a little. I mean, because nobody has seen him and—" she cut herself off. "It's stupid." She repeated.
"He isn't dead." Percy said after a moment. It was true, nobody knew where Nico was, not even Hades, but he wasn't dead. If he was, Hades would know that. "And… and Nico's, you know, he's Nico. He can handle himself." Percy assured her, even if he didn't believe what he was saying.
"I know, I know." Annabeth said. She pointed out Zoë constellation for him (how did she know that's the one he'd been looking for?). "I told you it was stupid."
Later that night, Percy laid in the Poseidon cabin, his eyes focused on the bubbling fountain his father had added for him and Tyson all those years back. That talk with Annabeth had been… strange, to say the least. Of course he wondered about Nico. Worried about him, even. Not many people had cared when Nico disappeared after the war with Gaea, but Percy had, apparently Annabeth had too.
Nico di Angelo's disappearance (though technically it wasn't qualified to be called that, since from what everyone at camp could tell, he wasn't seriously in danger) had been very… sudden. He never really stuck anywhere, which everyone knew. So when he first disappeared after the final battle, no one had worried much. It was more so, when nobody had heard anything from him in about five months, people started to get uneasy. Hazel, actually, who had contacted Camp Half-Blood about two months into the so-called 'disappearance'. He hadn't been to Camp Jupiter to visit. And when she found out he hadn't shown his face at Camp Half-Blood either, well, she went a little ballistic.
It was okay, Chiron assured her, Nico often spent months at a time in the Underworld. Helping Hades and things of that nature. Hazel wasn't convinced, but it calmed her down, a little. At least, until the winter solstice when the camps went to visit Mount Olympus. Hades, apparently, hadn't seen Nico either (he also seemed slightly bitter Nico hadn't come to do his usual biddings). At any rate, Hades had said, he wasn't dead. Of course, even if he did know where Nico was, he couldn't say. Gods weren't allowed to interfere with mortal affairs.
It well, kind of sucked, to be honest. Percy and Nico had a rocky past, sure, but they were still friends. As friendly as Nico got with anyone, anyway. No one understood why he'd left, and it was quite possible no one ever would. Which… sucked (Percy supposed he would have to expand his vocabulary, because the word 'sucked' didn't really cut it). Maybe he just wanted to get away. He was pretty young to have experienced one war, let alone two, not to mention how especially hard the Giant War had been on him. Everyone else, too, if Percy was being fair, but mostly Nico. Who was barely fourteen and had faced Tartarus alone.
Percy yawned. There was no use thinking about it now, he thought. Nico was gone, and maybe he was happier. Because if anyone deserved to be happy, it was Nico.
"Percy!" Annabeth called out the next morning. She looked radiant in the early sun, her hair exactly like gold against the sunlight. "Percy," she said again, jogging up to the Poseidon table. Only now did he notice the dark circles under her eyes, the way her lips turned down at the corners, and the all-around worried look on her face. "Percy," she said for the third time, and she sounded breathless. "Can I talk to you for a second?"
"Sure," Percy turned away from the blueberry pancakes he'd been half-heartedly eating. "What's up?"
Annabeth sat down next to him, earning herself a glare from Mr.D. She took Percy's hand in her own, then dropped it, looking down with her eyebrows furrowed. "I don't know how to tell you this." she struggled for the right words. "It's just so hard for me to. I just." she paused.
"Annabeth." Percy said seriously. "What's wrong. What's so hard for you—"
"I'm going to New Rome." Annabeth blurted, covering her face with her her hands. She sighed. "I'm going to New Rome, and I… I'm going alone."
Needless to say, Percy was shocked. "What?" he asked, nearly shouted, disbelievingly. "What?" he said again, softly to himself.
Annabeth tried to take his hand again, but he shook her off. "Percy, don't you know this is hard for me, too? But I have to do something." she said. "I need to find a life away from camp, and in New Rome they have scholars that could cater to my needs, and—"
"I know what they have." Percy interrupted, his voice cold and hard. "Because we were supposed to go together. Remember that?" he asked, rhetorically. "Remember?"
"Percy." Annabeth said, her eyes red and swollen with oncoming tears. "Percy, you're not being fair."
And no, maybe he wasn't being fair, but right now he didn't really care if he was or wasn't. Percy resisted the urge to stand up, and make a scene. "What about you leaving, Annabeth?" he demanded. "Is that fair? Do you think that's fair?"
"Yes!" she answered, trying to dry her eyes. "Percy, you and I need to learn not to be so dependent on each other. We need to learn how not to need one another."
"So, you're breaking up with me?" Percy asked.
Annabeth stood up, trying to compose herself. "If that's how you're choosing to look at it," she said, still sounding heartbroken. "Then fine." and she walked away without looking back.
So Percy went home.
His mom was, of course, ecstatic. Angry, at first, but the anger washed away quickly, leaving her happy and clingy. She was pregnant, too. Six months, it was girl. Percy was going to have a sister. He was happy, he really was, but mostly he was just tired. In the two months before his junior year of high school, Percy slept a lot. Sally began to worry, and Percy (to know avail) tried to convince her he was fine, just tired. But he knew he was lying and so did she. Still, she left him alone. Everyone left him alone. And that was fine.
He was fine, really.
It was one of the rare days that Percy wasn't sleeping or in his room. He sat on the couch in the living room, flipping through the channels and finally settling on Supernatural. It was the season two finale, and Sam (wasn't he the tall one?) was dying. Percy had seen this show a few times, but hadn't ever really got into it. Now it seemed like the most interesting thing in world. Percy yawned and settled back into the couch, not moving again for two hours, when someone knocked on the door.
Percy almost yelled for Paul, or his mom to get it, not feeling like getting up. Then he remembered that they were out to lunch and it was probably one of them knocking. They probably left their keys, he thought as he got up to answer the door. "Hold on," he called, as he slowly made his way to the door. However, when he opened it, it wasn't his mother, or Paul, at the door.
It was Nico di Angelo.
He looked different, and that was the first thing Percy noticed about him. Taller, kind of, but still quite a bit shorter than Percy. His shaggy black hair was in sort of a short messy ponytail. He'd even gotten one of his ears pierced, both the lobe and the cartilage of his left ear. But he was still dangerously pale, and his eyes were still his eyes. Big, and brown, and broken. He seemed familiar and completely unrecognizable all at the same time.
"Um," Nico said, and his voice sounded a little deeper. Barely noticeable, but Percy did. "Hi."
"Where the hell have you been?" Percy demanded, torn between wanting to hug Nico and wanting to yell at him. He settled for yelling, because the hug urge was kind of weird. "Do you realize how worried I— we've been?" he corrected himself so quickly he was sure Nico hadn't heard him.
"I needed to get away." Nico admitted. "Can I come in?"
"What?" Percy asked. "Oh, yeah. Sorry." he moved away from the door frame and gestured for Nico to sit down.
He did, and looked at Percy. "I needed to get away," he repeated. "So I asked Hermes to help me out. He owed me a couple favors." Nico smirked darkly before continuing. "He made it so I wouldn't be found by anyone unless I wanted to be. I made him swear on the Styx he wouldn't tell." he ran a hand through the bangs that covered his eyes.
"Needed to get away?" Percy replied, dubious. "You've gone for almost a year! Do you know how much— wait." Percy stopped himself, and realized he was being incredibly selfish. "Have you even told Hazel you were back, or Jason? They're going insane wondering where you are."
"I went to visit Hazel first." Nico said. "She angry and she slapped me and I guess I deserved it." Nico admitted. "Then she told me I should see you, so I went to Camp Half-Blood, and saw Jason. He and Chiron told me you were here."
"She's praetor, now, you know." Percy said. "Hazel is."
"Yeah," Nico smiled a little. "I know. It's too bad about Reyna, though." he said, quietly. "She was good."
Percy remembered that Nico and Reyna had spent a lot of time together, delivering the Athena Parthos back to Camp Half-Blood right before she died. "Yeah," Percy said, and his voice was thick with emotion. "She was."
"Do you wanna go somewhere?" Nico asked, suddenly. "Are you, are you hungry or something?"
"Sure," Percy said, even though he hadn't wanted to leave his house for the past few months. He wanted to now. "Let me go get dressed." he said, and went into his room. He changed out of his give-up-on-life-pants (Percy may have had a slight obsession with Adventure Time) and into jeans. Then shoved his feet into his shoes. When he went back in the living room, he saw sitting on the couch, chatting idly with his mother.
"Oh, Percy." His mom smiled when she noticed him. "Paul saw one of his theater friends from college outside." she explained. "I was just talking to Nico here about what I should name the baby." she turned back to Nico. "Paul and I can't decided between Nora or Delilah, so—"
"Mom," Percy interrupted. "Nico and I were actually just leaving."
Sally raised her eyebrows, shocked. Percy hadn't gone out in a while, after all. "Oh, don't let me intrude, then." she smiled, then yawned. "I'm kinda tired anyway." she stood up and carefully made her way to her bedroom. "You two have fun."
Nico stood up, too. "You have a very nice mother." he said, sounding genuine.
"Uh," Percy scratched the back of his neck, awkwardly. "Thanks." he finally answered. "Should we head out?"
"Yeah," Nico said, and they made their way out into the rich, late morning sun. It was a nice day, a good day for a walk. "Where's the closest McDonald's?" Nico asked, when they were about a block away from Percy's. Percy noticed Nico was wearing fingerless gloves, even though it was hotter than Hades.
"Not too far." Percy replied. "There's one about six blocks down and around the corner." he pointed down the street. "Are you cold?" Percy asked, wishing he had a coat or something to lend, even though Nico was already wearing his heavy aviator jacket.
Nico shrugged. "Kind of," he said. "It's a child of Hades thing, I guess."
When they were two blocks away from the McDonald's, Nico did something completely unexpected.
He lit a cigarette.
Percy looked at him strangely for a long time before saying, idiot he is, "You know those are bad for you?"
Nico smirked at him, the left side of his mouth lifted higher than the right. "Yeah?" Nico replied and blew a cloud of smoke. "Ask me if I give a shit."
Percy was quiet for a moment. "Can I have one?" he asked. He remembered someone saying one that smoking released nerves and stress. That was all he felt these days.
"You don't smoke." Nico replied.
Percy plucked the cigarette right from between Nico's lips, sticking it between his own. It was still wet from where Nico's mouth touched it. Percy inhaled, resisting the urge to cough. "Neither do you, last I remember." he tossed the cigarette to the ground.
"People change." Nico said, liting another.
"I guess they do."
"Where'd you go?" Percy asked. "When you left, I mean, where'd you go?"
"Athens." Nico replied. "Somewhere I knew the language." he shoved two fries in his mouth, and took a drink of Coke. "I holed up with this daughter of Hecate and her boyfriend. He could see through the Mist."
"Oh," Percy took a big bite of burger, not sure what to say.
"I, uh, heard about you and Annabeth." Nico said. "Sorry."
"It's fine." Percy realized he meant it. He hadn't even thought about Annabeth once when he saw Nico.
"Listen," Nico said, sitting up straighter in his chair. "The reason Hazel told me I should come see you, is because she found something out about me." he paused. "And she thinks you deserve to know."
"Okay, shoot." Percy geared himself up. "What is it?"
Nico picked at the bun of his burger, nervous. "I didn't just leave because I wanted to get away for a while." Nico said, avoiding Percy's eyes. "I left because. I left because I was afraid."
Percy furrowed his eyebrows, confused. "Afraid of what, Nico?"
Nico sighed. "I don't… I don't even know Percy, really. Of myself, I guess? Of you, maybe."
"Why would you be afraid of me?" Percy asked, trying not to feel hurt.
Nico seemed not to have heard. "But I was gone for so long, and it still didn't go away." he said, and he looked up at Percy. "I had feelings for you." Nico admitted. "And I still do." he looked down at his hands in his lap. "I thought that maybe if I left, I would get over you. But I'm not yet. I swear, Percy, I am trying—"
"Nico." Percy whispered, like he was telling Nico a secret. "It's okay."
Nico looked up at him through his long, dark eyelashes. "Are you— really?"
"Yeah." Percy said, and he leaned over the table, awkwardly, and kissed Nico. It was dry, and close-mouthed, but Percy still felt something, and was sure Nico felt something too. "Really."
"Usually," Percy said. "I am not a fan of ocean pollution of any sort." he and Nico stood on the edge of the lake at Camp Half-Blood, where the water overlapped against the sand. "But since this isn't technically the ocean, and this is a completely symbolic, and ceremonial gesture, I am going to allow it."
Nico smiled, and shook his head. "Shut up." Then he reached into the pocket of Percy's blue sweatshirt (Percy insisted he wear it, so he wouldn't get too cold), and pulled out a half-crushed pack of cigarettes. Then he tossed them into the blue-green depths of the lake.
"Whoo!" Percy shouted, clapping. He punched the air with his fist. "Yeah!"
Nico laughed. "You're ridiculous, you know that?"
"You love me." Percy teased, pulling Nico close.
Nico leaned in and kissed him. "So what if I do?"
"I don't blame you." Percy smiled. "I love you, too."
A/N: Originally posted on Archive of Our Own. If you want to read more of my work you can find me there by the same name.
Feedback is much needed and appreciated!
-Nearly Wicked