A/N - this is something that popped into my head. I don't own these characters. Please don't sue me.

Something Like Olivia

Rain droplets drizzled along the floor to ceiling window, leaving streaks of water that blurred and distorted the buildings and lights outside. Fits my mood perfectly, Alex thought as she shut the door to her office, turned the lock and passed by row after row of bleary windows. It had been a long day, full of tedious paperwork and hopeless cases. She ran a hand through her tousled hair, readjusted her glasses, and shifted from one foot to the other while she waited for the elevator.

"Hey, Alex!"

She turned at the voice, surprised that anyone was still up here at this hour. It was dark already and the rain was enough to dampen anyone's after-hours overtime-working itch. She was even more surprised at whom the voice belonged to. It was a certain dark haired detective jogging towards her, her leather jacket folded over her arm. Slowing as she reached Alex, the brunette was obviously out of breath, but she was positively glowing despite the rain and gloom happening outside.

"Liv, hey," Alex said, brow furrowing. She couldn't figure out what Olivia was doing there. Usually the two rarely saw each other, as Alex was no longer assigned to handle SVU's cases. They met up a few times every now and then but were both unbelievably busy. They had always been unbelievably busy. Things hadn't changed since they first met, back when Alex was the new kid on the block, back when everyone thought she was the IAB's personal narc. Over time, though, she wormed her way into their hearts, her complete and undeniable understanding and respect for the law combined with her tendency to bend it just a little bit for victims if she had to, and won the entire squad over.

They had been through so much together, Alex's fake death and departure to the Witness Protection Program, and then her surprise return to help put her 'killer' away for good. Alex often found herself missing Olivia and Elliot and Munch and Fin and Cragen, they had become her family over the years, the only family she had left after her mother passed away.

And here was Olivia, at her office, looking excited and flustered and Alex couldn't help but wonder why. Then all at once, Alex was confronted again with her emotions, her conflicting, confusing emotions that always seemed to pop up at these moments. Any moment that involved Olivia was a conflicting one, always had been. They had always been such perfect sparring partners, Olivia would search for a loophole, would wonder what they could do to get around this law or the next and Alex would strong arm her every time, explain that particular law and send her searching for another way, always another way. There were some moments when emotions between the two of them were so high, Alex wasn't sure what it was exactly they were fighting about. That passion could have so easily been transferred over into something else, something more. But it had never happened. All these years and nothing had ever happened between them.

If she had one regret in her life, it would be the regret of never taking a chance with Olivia Benson. Of never mustering up the courage to do something about her feelings, of never having tasted Olivia's lips, of never having felt her hidden expanses of skin, her gorgeous, olive skin. Of never having the pleasure of waking up in the morning with those brown eyes gazing lovingly at her from across the pillow.

And now, Olivia was taken.

Alex heard about it through the usual office gossip earlier that day. A group of interns casually standing by the copy machine happened to be chatting about it as she walked past. She heard Olivia's name, mentioned in conjunction with that slime ball Brian Cassidy, that blast from the past, and she stopped in her tracks. Trying not to appear too eager or stalker-ish, she eased her way back towards the group and listened closer. They said something about Munch and the new detective, Amaro, who had taken Elliot's place investigating Cassidy for rape. When they got to his apartment, they were met by none other than a half-dressed Olivia Benson herself. Unbelievable. To say that she was heartbroken would be a little extreme. She understood that Olivia, a fully grown single woman, was completely free to date anyone she wanted. And Olivia had dated a plethora of guys over the years, but none of those idiots were anywhere near good enough for her. They were either jerks who got off on what she did for a living, or they were too close to the job itself, or they were Brian Cassidy: the worst of them all.

Olivia told her about Cassidy back then, how he wasn't cut out for the job, claimed he didn't have what it took to be an SVU detective, that he asked to be transferred to narcotics. But Olivia figured his transfer had a lot more to do with what happened between the two of them. Their one night stand turned into something he wanted more of, and she felt exactly the opposite, and perhaps his pride was hurt too badly for him to show his face around the squad room. And now, all these years later, they were dating or sleeping together or something. Whatever it was now, it wasn't good. He was connected to prostitutes and pimps and yes, he was working undercover, but he was under suspicion there for a while of helping to set Captain Cragen up with his prostitute girlfriend, who ended up dead. Alex knew her suspicions and jealousies had no real basis and she couldn't judge him without knowing the full story, but even the sound of his name gave her a bad feeling. It just wasn't right. No one would be right for her.

So, needless to say, she felt a great many things as Olivia stood before her: regret, sadness, confusion, adrenaline beginning to pump through her veins, and the beginning of that familiar lick of desire from deep inside. She couldn't help it.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, trying not to sound too surprised.

"This is crazy, I know. And I probably should have called. You probably have plans, but I got a wild hair," Olivia said, smiling her half smile.

"A wild hair?" Alex asked, stepping into the elevator and turning to face Olivia as she pushed the button for the bottom floor.

"Yeah. I know it's been a while since we've gone out, but I think it's time for a girl's night. I think you and I are going to have a blast. We're gonna go out on the town and get wild. What do you say?" She really did look excited now.

"But it's raining," Alex didn't want to sound like a Debbie Downer but her mood after hearing the news and now seeing the once-again unavailable Olivia in front of her was not exactly good for going out on the town.

Olivia waved her hand dismissively. "It's Karaoke night down at McManus and I think we should go. We can do a duet. And drink a little. Yes? Say yes."

She looked so sweet with her big eyes and she was practically jumping up and down, so Alex couldn't say anything but yes. She rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically, staring straight ahead with a smile, and she could see Olivia grinning from the corner of her eye. "Fine," she said.

"Yes. Ok, good. Let's go right now."

"Right now! You're not even going to let me change clothes?" Alex turned abruptly towards her and gestured at herself. "I've been wearing this all day!"

Olivia eyed her mischievously. "You look great. You always do. And besides, it's late already so we're going now."

Sighing again, Alex stepped off the elevator and then stood to the side, allowing Olivia to take the lead. "After you," she said, unable to keep the smile out of her voice.

Outside, Alex stood uneasily at the open doorway to the courthouse, wishing she had thought to bring an umbrella when Olivia stepped past her, leaving a hint of clean laundry smell and something else that was pleasant but unidentifiable, something uniquely Olivia, and pulled out an oversized black umbrella from her jacket pocket allowing Alex to stand beneath it with her. She hailed a cab from the sidewalk, momentarily sacrificing the dry sleeve of her coat to wave him down. Holding the door for a still slightly perplexed Alex, she smiled warmly and followed the blonde into the car's backseat.

On the way to the bar, they chatted about work, about current cases and what the other had been up to recently, falling back into their old habit of easy companionship with one another. But before long, they pulled up in front of McManus, the partially secluded, hole-in-the-wall bar off 35th street. Olivia started to pull her wallet out to pay the driver, but Alex put a gentle hand on her arm. "You're taking me out. The least I can do is pay for the cab." Olivia pursed her lips and shrugged, stepping out into the rain and hurriedly snapping the umbrella open.

"Fine," she said over the sound of water splashing against concrete.

"Don't be affronted, detective. I'll let you buy my drinks." Alex couldn't help but sound flirtatious, she just hoped it wasn't too obvious.

Olivia laughed and Alex couldn't help herself; she smiled and tried to push away the giddy feeling she always had when she managed to make the usually stoic detective display any sort of happy emotion.

The few and far between occasions she had been to this bar with Olivia, Alex usually enjoyed herself. It was a fun place, sort of rustic and ancient feeling but with a definite New York City flair. The huge bar was the focal point, dark wood that looked fancy from far away but up close it was riddled with carvings and hearts and all sorts of signatures. There was a shiny golden foot rest beneath the bar and pictures of an eclectic variety covered the exposed brick walls. Black and white scenes of the city sat in frames next to odd photographs of animals, cats and dogs and some thoroughbred horses, there were even some people interspersed here and there. A few celebrities who frequented the place but mostly random people the owner thought interesting enough to feature on the wall.

The stage in the corner was already occupied with a karaoke singer, a young man singing a sad song about rain. It sounded like country, so Alex didn't listen too closely. She and Olivia found empty seats at the partially crowded bar and sat down, waiting for the bartender to notice them.

Olivia ordered first, telling the bartender she wanted a scotch on the rocks, and Alex eyed her playfully, nudging her with her elbow. "That's what I was going to order."

"Beat you to it," Olivia said and nodded to the bartender. "Make it two, and put them both on my tab, please." He set about making their drinks, and Alex turned on her stool to face Olivia, watching as the brunette mirrored her action.

"So. What are we planning on singing?"

Olivia thought for a moment and shrugged her shoulders. "I dunno. I've never really done karaoke before. What do you like to sing?"

Mouth dropping open, Alex couldn't believe what she was hearing. "What?" she almost screeched. "Okay, first of all, you drag me down here in my work clothes convincing me that we're going to have a 'wild night' and you've never even done karaoke? And second of all, what kind of a person has never done karaoke?"

Throwing her head back to laugh heartily, Olivia grinned, shrugging again. "It seemed like a fun idea at the time. I just thought I would try something new with you."

At first Alex didn't know what to say. She thought about all the ways she could interpret that last statement and thought better of it. It was best not to read too deeply into anything Olivia Benson said. She was a very private person and the chances of her meaning anything more than what she said were slim to none, especially with her current dating situation. Brian Cassidy. The bastard.

Finally, she settled for vague. "Well, we'll have to remedy your lack of experience right away. I'm going to need a few of these drinks before I get up on any stage, though," Alex joked.

Nodding, Olivia reached for the whiskey that just arrived and raised it to clink glasses gently with Alex's. "Here's to new things," she said with a half-smile.

. . . .

Two scotches and one beer later, Alex could feel the alcohol seeping into her system. Her brain was feeling a little slower, her words wouldn't quite come out like she wanted them to and her mood felt considerably better. Except of course for that nagging thought at the back of her mind. That one about Olivia. She was still unhappy about the unwanted news she heard earlier that day. It could have been days old news, who knows, but it still wasn't something she wanted to hear. The brunette returned from the bathroom and sat down heavily in the stood next to Alex's. And there was that smell again, that wonderful smell unique to Olivia. She tried to look like she wasn't visibly sniffing the air as she glanced down at her beer bottle, unconsciously peeling the label off the glass.

Olivia leaned into her and nudged her lightly, grinning. "You ever heard what they say about people who peel the label off their bottle?"

Alex's fingers froze. She had heard, but she hadn't realized she was doing it. "I just uh . . . need something to do with my hands," Alex said, smiling nervously as she took a sip of her beer.

"I know, that's what I'm talking about," Olivia laughed, obviously enjoying the deer-in-headlights look form the attorney. "Anyway. You ready to sing? I already put our name and song in. We're next."

Alex's eyes shot up to meet Olivia's. "You're kidding. Already? What are we singing?"

"You're not nervous are you?" Olivia eyed her suspiciously. "Miss What Kind of a Person Hasn't Sung Karaoke."

She placed her beer on the bar a little harder than she intended, surprising the people near her with a loud thunk. Ignoring their stares, she stood up. "Of course not. Let's do this." There was nothing Alex Cabot loved more than a challenge. Except maybe the thought of Olivia Benson's hands on her body. Whoops, she thought. Keep that mind out of the gutter. They walked together over to the stage as an older woman's song ended. Everyone clapped and cheered, as it was getting late and people were beginning to drink enough to the point where just about anything sounded pretty damn good.

Up on the stage, Olivia handed Alex the extra microphone. "What did you say we were singing?" Alex asked.

"I didn't. But you'll love it," Olivia said, turning to face the screen with a serious look on her face. Alex wished she could see more of this playful side of Olivia. Usually she was so beaten down and haunted by all the years in SVU. Tonight was a good night for the detective. The opening notes to a very familiar song pulled Alex out of her reverie. "Oh shit," she murmured away from the mic and glanced over at Olivia. "Really?"

It was Aretha Franklin's Respect.

Alex rolled her eyes and just went with it. She was pretty buzzed and it looked like Olivia was too. They took turns singing back up for each other. Alex had the just a just a just a part while Olivia belted out the reasons why she wanted some respect. And Olivia backed up Alex at the sock it to me part. Dancing around the stage, bobbing their heads and pointing to people at the bar and on the sparse dance floor, all of it was a blast. A few people wolf-whistled and yelled out for an encore, but all that dancing took a lot of energy. Alex couldn't stop laughing when the song ended. She doubled over at the bar and grabbed hold of Olivia's upper arm, not missing the feel of toned muscles beneath her shirt.

"Oh my god, Liv. That was incredible," she said, trying to catch her breath. Olivia was laughing and taking a sip of the fresh beer that appeared out of nowhere.

"It really was," she said. "And look, someone liked it so much, they bought us beer!"

"Yes!" Alex cried out as she bowed to her nonexistent fans, reaching out for her beer.

"Alex, this has been really fun. I'm so glad you agreed to come out with me tonight." Olivia said, a little more serious now that the next singer had taken the stage to scattered applause.

"It's not like you gave me much choice. You practically dragged me out of my office."

"Yeah right, Alex. I knew you were a sucker for karaoke. I could sense it."

Smiling into her beer, Alex felt a pang of longing. She wanted to be around Olivia more often, not to see her every now and then, waiting for her to show up with a wild hair. She wanted to see Olivia smile and laugh and enjoy the wonderful things about life every single day. Knowing exactly how hard it was being around SVU day in and day out, Alex couldn't help but wonder how Olivia kept herself together like she did. Most detectives didn't make it more than a couple years. She knew it was a combination of things: the family Olivia had made for herself at the 1-6, all those detectives who had been around for almost as long as she had, and in Munch's case, even longer. And Olivia was the most driven woman Alex had ever met. There was no one more dedicated to helping victims than the woman sitting next to her.

But at that moment, Olivia seemed happy. She must have been in pretty good place, having connected with Cassidy again and finally established herself a committed relationship. Love looked good on Olivia Benson, even if it wasn't with the person Alex thought she should be with. She felt the heaviness of disappointment weighing on her shoulders and looked over at her brunette companion. And she realized something.

This woman was a one-in-a-million. Sure she was married to the job, but so was Alex. Sure she had commitment problems but that might be all in the past. Alex felt a bit hopeful. And determined. And suddenly, her pang of longing turned into an idea, a buzzed idea if there ever was one. She wanted to sing a song for Olivia. And not just any song. If there was ever a time to test the waters and really see if she would ever have a shot with this incredible woman, it was right then. She didn't want to think about how much regret she would feel if Olivia ended up marrying the bastard and being stolen away from her forever.

She had the absolute perfect song. A friend who was interested in vinyl records and all the hubbub about sound quality and all that recently bought John Mayer's album. It came with an extra CD and she gave it to Alex, who still listened to CDs at her apartment, as ancient as that practice might be. She remembered how eerie she felt listening to John sing all about Olivia and how much he needed a love like hers. And that was before she knew about Cassidy. Sure, he didn't want to steal anyone's girl, but he did want everyone to know what his idea of a perfect woman was. So now, Olivia really was taken, and the song was absolutely perfect.

Without even looking at Olivia, she took a swig of her beer and marched her way to the stage. There was no one on the stage, no one in line. It was the perfect lull, and she could feel Olivia's eyes on the back of her head. But she didn't care. She rifled quickly through the binder labeled for the year 2012-2013 and quickly found the number. Handing it to the DJ, she stepped up on the stage, grabbed hold of the mic and cleared her throat.

When the music started, she closed her eyes, smiling to herself. She really did like the song. It was bluesy and had a great beat. It sounded like something off a Stevie Ray Vaughan record.

"Well, Olivia's taken, But a look like hers can be found from time to time," she sang, trying to make her usually soprano voice match the tone and she ended up making her voice sound gravel-y, like she had recently woken up from a deep sleep and hadn't used her voice in a while.

"I'm thinking, something like Olivia . . . is what I need to find," and she looked up, searching for the brunette at the bar. She was right where Alex had left her, leaning against the bar and staring at her, open-mouthed with her beer still in hand. She continued, moving her head now to the music.

"There's only one man in this world, Who gets to sleep with her by his side," A few people were listening, but she didn't care what they thought of her singing voice, the fact that she missed a few too many notes, and that she was singing directly to a detective whose name happened to be in the song.

"I'm thinking something like Olivia, Can keep me through the night," And the next part was one she didn't completely agree with. She wouldn't mind stealing her away from Cassidy one bit.

"Now I'm not trying to steal, No love away from no one man," she repeated the line, staring right into Olivia's eyes, making sure she knew who the song was for and why she was singing it.

"But if Olivia herself were at my door, I'd have to say I'd let her in,"John must have read her mind. He apparently wouldn't mind stealing Olivia away either, if the opportunity presented itself.

"Something like Olivia. I keep thinking something like Olivia, Is what I need to find."

She finished the song, and the crowd clapped for her, but her eyes were glued to one person. Olivia had set her beer down and was unsure of herself as she clapped along with everyone else. Her brow furrowed as Alex approached her. And now that she had gotten the hard part over with it, Alex didn't quite know what to say.

"Alex, that was . . . What was that?" Olivia asked, dipping her head a bit as she tended to do when she really wanted an answer out of someone.

Alex ran a hand through her hair. "Well, that was . . . um . . . a song for you."

"I could see that, but I don't understand." She still looked confused, and Alex looked up, exasperated.

"It's not blaringly clear, Liv?" When the detective shook her head, Alex sighed. "I meant every word of that song."

"You did?" Well, shit. Alex thought. I don't know what I was expecting, but I wasn't prepared for a failure. But that was another of Alex's qualities, always expecting to get what she wanted, she wasn't used to people saying no.

"Yes, I did. But I know that I probably should've kept my big mouth shut. You're obviously happy now with Cassidy and I don't know what the hell I'm doing."

Olivia's head moved back and her eyebrows knitted together. "Cassidy? Alex, what are you talking about?"

Shaking her head, Alex stepped back, wanting to find a quick exit or maybe the bathroom to throw up her humiliation. "Liv, you don't have to hide. I heard the water-cooler gossip today. I know about you and Cassidy. That's why you're so happy tonight."

"Oh," Olivia said, running her own hand through her hair. And as Alex nodded her understanding and acceptance of defeat, Olivia stood up straighter and grabbed her arm. "Alex, wait. No. You don't have the whole story."

"The whole story?" Do I even want to know?

"Yes. Look, yes, Brian and I dated after he was shot and everything that happened with Cragen. I knew he was innocent and it was nice being with him. He's a lot of fun and a great guy."

"That sounds like what I already knew," Alex said, her voice even.

"Let me finish, Alex. Quit being such a lawyer."

Rolling her eyes, Alex relaxed a little, sitting down on her stool and watching as Olivia did the same. They both had abandoned their drinks, realizing that now was not the time to be under the influence.

"Everything was great until he was accused of rape. He was innocent again, of course, and the trial was a real mess. You would have handled it much better," And at this, Alex smiled. Flatterer.

"But he and I got into a fight. He told me exactly what happened and I said okay. He just couldn't believe that I trusted him and believed him. But I really did. I know what kind of a guy he is and I knew he wouldn't lie to me."

"Anyway, when the trial was over after his accuser recanted, I told him I was glad it was all over and he threw it in my face, saying he wasn't sure if I ever believed him at all. I was so mad at him, you know?"

Alex nodded, not completely sure that this wasn't a dream. Was Olivia really saying that she actually wasn't happy with Cassidy, that they weren't really together?

"So, he took off. I don't know, I guess he never trusted me at all. So here I am."

"But, Liv. I don't understand. Surely you were sad about him leaving and not trusting you. Right?"

"Of course I was. I really did like him. But it's been about a week or so and I still haven't heard from him. I guess the gossip at the courthouse is a bit out of the loop. Old news. And I'm not going to waste my time worrying about some asshole who can't trust me. And for no fault of my own. I'm over it."

Looking into her eyes, Alex saw that she was being completely honest, that she was really okay with the way things worked out.

"So why the sudden decision to go out and invite me along?" And at this, Olivia smiled. Alex thought she detected a slight blush but she couldn't be sure with the darkness of the bar.

"I don't know Alex, I guess I realized something today. I got to thinking about you. I don't know what it was that reminded me of you, but I just realized how much I missed you. And I think it took hearing what Cassidy had to say to see that. I realized that you would never lose faith in me. You've been there for me all these years, after everything we've been through. If you were accused of something, you would know without a doubt that I was behind you one hundred percent." She paused, looked down at her hands.

"It was one of those moments. One of those epiphanies I guess. I realized I wanted to be spending time with you, not wasting time with anyone else. Especially not with someone who doesn't trust me."

Again, Alex didn't know what to say. They were dancing around something here. She could feel it.

Olivia turned away from her for a moment, focused her attention on the bartender and asked to pay her tab. When she looked back, she was smiling.

"So that song." She started, reaching out for one of Alex's hands. The blonde couldn't stop the shiver that ran through her at Olivia's touch. She held Alex's hand in her own, staring down at it, seemingly memorizing its details, feeling the skin and muscles and tendons and bones with her own fingers. Alex's eyes searched Olivia's face, and finally their eyes met and Alex laughed gently.

"What about it?"

"You really meant it?" Her brown eyes were sparkling and earnest.

"Of course I did. Didn't you see me walk up there and belt it out like it was the end of the world?"

She had succeeded in making Olivia laugh again, and she began to memorize for herself the feel of Olivia's hand in her own, wishing, wondering if this could be real, if she might actually feel this all the time.

"I saw you all right. I just can't believe you feel the same way about me," Olivia said quietly.

"That's ridiculous. You've been dating all these guys for all these years and now you're telling me you've had . . . what? Feelings for me this entire time?" Alex couldn't believe that. It was unreal.

"Alex," Olivia said, reaching up with her free hand to gently caress the strong line of Alex's jaw. "Trust me."

And she did. Her eyes fluttered closed as Olivia leaned in closer and closer, finally pressing her lips against Alex's. She pressed harder, moving her mouth now and standing up to move between Alex's legs on the barstool. The feelings surging through Alex's veins and the roaring inside her ears was so intense she thought she might pass out. Her own hands reached up to touch Olivia's arms, her face, anything she could. Anything to tell her this was real.

They broke apart, and Alex opened her eyes to stare directly into Olivia's. She put a hand up to her lips, feeling the moisture there and realizing that it was actually happening. "God, Liv."

"I know," Olivia replied, smiling. "What the hell were we thinking all these years?"

The bartender cleared his throat.

They both turned to him and blushed furiously. He looked a bit embarrassed himself, as if he had just interrupted a very private moment. Which he had. "Here's your bill," he said quietly, turning and busying himself with the other patrons.

"Let's get out of here," Alex said as her companion left an appropriate amount of cash. She grabbed Olivia's hand and pulled her towards the door, barely remembering their coats and umbrella hanging near the entryway.

"Where to?"

"I don't care, Liv," Alex said, smiling. She wrapped her arms around the detective beneath the umbrella in the pouring rain and pulled her close. They moved together, mouths parting and exploring new and unfamiliar places and Alex knew she would never be kissed like that again by anyone else besides the woman in her arms. "I'll go anywhere with you."

…