I woke up and saw Danny lying in my bed again. We had an amazing gig last night and me and Danny always talk afterwards. It happens more and more these days that he falls asleep in my bed.
I smiled at the peacefully sleeping boy and felt tingles in my tummy. Wait.. what am I doing? I shook my head and went downstairs to the kitchen. There I found Harry and Dougie already eating.
'Morning guys' I mumbled and took some cereal
'Morning Tom' Dougie and Harry said together. They looked at each other, laughed and kissed. For a minute there I saw me and Danny kissing and I was fixed on the sight.
'Err, Tom? I thought you were ok with us being together?' Dougie asked uncomfortable
I snapped out of my dream and realized that it was so wrong! Why am I dreaming that I'm kissing Danny? We're just friends, best friends. He's not gay, he has a girlfriend and I'm not gay either! Am I?
'Earth to Tom?' Dougie said half laughing
'Oh, yeah yeah I am, don't worry' I said and began eating again. In the corner of my eyes I saw them giving me a weird look.
'Morning' and I froze when I heard his voice, his gorgeous voice. I looked up and saw Danny yawning and I couldn't help myself to smile at the sight. He had the most gorgeous out of bed look. His hair was pointing in different directions and his beautiful blue eyes were still sleepy. Not to mention he was topless! God he has an amazing body..Dougie and Harry greeted him and all I could do was stare.
'Everything ok Tom?' he asked, breaking me out of my thoughts
'Don't be bothered by it Danny' I heard Dougie say 'He's been acting just a little weird this morning'
He looked at me with worry in his eyes and placed his hand on mine. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling. Man.. what the hell is wrong with me?
'You sure you're ok?' he whispered in my ear.
'YES!' I yelled and jumped up to walk away from him 'Why wouldn't I be?'
He stood confused by the chair where I just sat. 'Alright..' he said frowned, rolled his eyes and took his breakfast.
Get a grip over yourself Tom! There is no way you like Danny in that way. He's your best friend, don't ruin this now.
'Is Lisa coming today?' Harry asked Danny. Lisa.. Danny's girlfriend. She's a witch! She is nice as long as Danny is near but when he's not.. she's a real bitch. If only Danny knew..
'Yeah mate, she's on her way. She just text messaged me'
Great! Another day in paradise.. maybe I should tell Danny what kind of person she is. Yeah I should do that!
'Danny there is something you should know about..' but I couldn't finish my sentence, the doorbell rang. Lisa came in running, jumped on Danny and kissed him passionately.
'Shall we go to your room?' she asked using her sexy voice
'Wait a minute babe, Tom was just about to tell me something' he said to her, turned back to me and asked 'What were you going to tell me Tom?'
'Err, nothing never mind' I said and looked at Lisa whose face was furious because he had his attention on me and not her.
'Sure?' he asked and I nodded. He raised his shoulders said 'ok' and disappeared with Lisa.
I sighed. I can't tell him and not just because she was standing there with him. No, because I can't break up their relationship. That's just not who I am.
Am I gay? Is that who I am now? Do I love Danny? Every time I think of him I get butterflies in my belly and a huge smile on my face. I have never felt like this before. I guess.. I guess I do love him.
Yes! I love Danny, with all my heart. I can't imagine my life without him but he can never know! Never..
The hours passed and Danny and Lisa were back downstairs. We were all in the living room, talking and fooling around. It was fun but I probably looked a bit too much at Danny. I love seeing him smile, he has the most beautiful smile I've ever seen. And every time he smiled my heart skipped a beat and I smiled too. He didn't notice though but Lisa did.
'Tom, can I talk to you for a second?' she suddenly asked
'Err sure' I said and she led me to the kitchen.
'What do you think you're doing?' she asked
'Umm, having fun with my friends?' I said, playing dumb
'No' she said trying not to raise her voice 'You're staring at my boyfriend like a lovesick puppy dog'
I didn't answer. It's not that I didn't want to, it's that I didn't know what to say. She had me all figured out, I could see it in her eyes. And if those eyes could kill..
'You're in love with him aren't you?' she said really loud. She immediately looked at the living room and saw that the guys were still fooling around and couldn't hear her. She turned back to me and said 'Listen you freak! Get it out of your dirty mind. He's with me and we love each other'
'But do you love him like I do?' I asked her and walked back to my seat, leaving Lisa completely frozen. I didn't know where it came from, I guess it just kinda slipped out. But I didn't regret it one bit! I sat in my seat with a huge grin, I was proud of myself. I admitted for the first time that I was in love with Danny and it felt so good!
'DANNY!' she yelled from the kitchen
'What's wrong babe?' he asked slightly sighing
'Come here, NOW!'
He sighed and looked embarrassed at us 'Sorry guys, the boss calls' he said with a weak smile and went to the kitchen. Harry and Dougie were talking but I wasn't listening. I was trying to hear Danny and Lisa's conversation. I heard them talking but I couldn't understand them. They kept their voices really quiet so we couldn't hear them. Suddenly I heard Lisa let out a cry of frustration, took her coat and took off but not before she gave me this I'm going to kill you look.
And I became scared, scared that she might have told Danny how I feel about him. I guess I have to find that out..
Danny came back and let himself fall in his seat.
'What happened mate?' Harry asked
'We broke up' he said and looked at me
'Oh, sorry mate' Harry said tapping him on the shoulder 'Anyway we're going to get some rest' took Dougie by his hand and disappeared
There were a few minutes of silence between me and Danny.
'She told you didn't she?' I asked looking down
'yeah she did' he said silent
I knew it! Oh man this is going to ruin everything! But wait a minute? Why did he break up with her? There is no reason to break up with her just because I have feelings for him unless.. could it be that he loves me too?
'But why did you break up with her?' I just had to ask.
'Because she was calling you dirty and a freak' he said 'She obviously has a problem with gay guys. Dougie and Harry are gay and I guess you're too and.. I couldn't let her insult my best mates'
'Ow ok' I said, somewhere I was hoping he had broken up with her because he loved me too. But I have to realize that's not going to happen.
'I should get some sleep' I said and went to my bedroom, leaving Danny on his own. I was hurt but honestly what else did I expect? That he just magically fall in love with me? God, I'm so naïve sometimes.
I tried to sleep but couldn't. I looked at the clock and saw that it was already 3 am. I decided to go downstairs to get a glass of water. But when I got there I saw Danny still sitting in the sofa. Right at the place where I left him, like he hadn't moved an inch.
I looked at him and it seemed like he was crying. He hadn't noticed me and I was struggling. Should I go to him or should I go back to my room quietly? I decided to go talk to him. I just couldn't let him cry here on his own, it was heartbreaking.
'Danny, what's wrong?' I asked
He was surprised by my voice. He quickly wiped away his tears and said 'Nothing' but the sadness in his voice gave him away.
'Come on mate, you can talk to me' I said and sat down next to him.
'It's just.. it's so unfair you know?' he said while a tear fell down on his cheeks. I felt a sudden urge to wipe it away with my hand but I had to control myself.
'What is?' I asked confused
'I finally find someone that loves me for who I am and not just because I'm famous and what do I do? I sent her away. What am I? Doomed? Doomed to walk this world on my own?' he said trying to fight his tears.
First I didn't know how to respond to that. But Danny needed me, and I had to be there for him. I took him in my arms and hugged him tight.
'Of course you're not doomed.' I said 'There are plenty of people that like you for who you are.'
He suddenly pulled free from my grip and wiped his tears.
'I'm sorry' he said 'I shouldn't be talking to you about this'
'Mate, I'm here for you. You can talk to me about everything. Just like old times'
'But I'm hurting you and.. I don't want to do that.'
'It's ok, really.' I said reassuring him. 'Listen, if it was true love then it would have lasted. You can't force true love, it comes to you when the time is right. But you have to keep believing.'
He looked straight into my eyes and I looked in his. Is it me or do I see love in them?
'Thanks' he said genuinely. 'But maybe we should go to sleep now' and smiled.
'You're right' I said and I was glad he smiled again. It made me smile too.
We went to our bedrooms and I slept immediately.
I woke up around 11 am and went downstairs to get some breakfast. Harry and Dougie were watching tv whilst lying cuddled up in the sofa. I looked around for Danny but I couldn't find him anywhere. I wanted to see how he was doing.
'Hey guys have you seen Danny?'
'Yeah, he was awake before us. He's in the music room. he said he needed something off his chest' Harry answered
I frowned. Needed something off his chest? I thanked Harry for the info and went to the music room. When I got there I heard him playing. I didn't want to disturb him so I waited by the door when he started singing.
I've been so many places in my life and time
I've sung a lot of songs, and I made some bad rhymes
I've acted out my life on stages, with ten thousand people watching
But we're alone now, and I'm singing this song to you.
I know your image of me is what I hope to be.
I've treated you unkindly, but darlin' can't you see.
There's no one more important to me, baby can't you see through me.
Cuz wer'e alone now, and I'm singing this song to you
Is this song about me?
You taught me precious secrets, Of a true love, with holding nothing.
You came out in front when I was hiding.
But now I'm so much better, and if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody, cuz my love is in there hiding
It is! This song is about me! I can't believe my ears but it's true.
I love you in a place, where there's no space or time.
I love you for my life, you're a friend of mine
And when my life is over, remember, remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song to you.
I love you in a place, where there's no space or time.
Said I love you for my life, you're a friend of mine.
And when my life is over, remember, remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song to you.
We were alone and I was singing this song to you.
Singing this song to you.
I didn't know what to do. Should I go in? No, I can't do that.
'You like the song Tom?' I heard him ask, breaking me out of my thoughts. How did he know that I was here? I walked in and saw him sitting still holding his guitar. He was looking at me with these gorgeous eyes.
'I do' I said careful
'Good' he said smiling. 'Because it's about you'
I was too shocked to say anything and just stood there nailed to the ground. He saw it and explained himself.
'Look, yesterday you've opened my eyes. I can't hurry up true love but when it comes by I can't be blind for it. Tom I've always loved you. I thought that it was in a best friends way but.. you're the most important person in my life. And I can't lose you. I think the reason why all my previous relationships went wrong is because I was looking for someone like you. But you're one of kind.'
I can't believe it. Is this a dream? If it is I never want to wake up. He looked at me and gave me a weak smile.
I couldn't stop myself anymore and walked to him, pulled him up and kissed him. He was surprised but kissed back.
'Am I dreaming?' I asked him while our heads were like 2 centimeters apart from each other.
'If you are, I hope you don't wake up.' He said. I smiled at his answer and if I wasn't certain about this yet I sure am now!
We kissed again and we both knew this was the start of something really beautiful.