I wrote this around midnight a few nights ago after an interesting conversation with Centress (aka Nithke). This was actually supposed to be humorous. Ha.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nothing at all. Except my Trinity boots. The lyrics are from Hayley Westenra's CD Pure, the song "Heaven."
The night was eerily silent. The engines seemed quieter than normal, which was unnerving in and of itself. The air was dank and chilly, as usual, and the only heat in the small room was found under their one blanket. But at the moment, Neo was alone; Trinity had sentinel duty for another half hour or so. The missing warmth of her body left an empty space in his mind and heart. He could never sleep when she wasn't there...or even when she was there. But having her there always made the insomnia easier to deal with.
It was funny how one person's presence could ease his mind. He had always found it hard to relax before he was unplugged. Insomnia was the result...as were endless nights of sitting at his computer until his eyes burned and went bloodshot.
Neo ran his hand over the spot beside him. When will she be back? That was always the question on his mind at this time of the night. When will she be back?
Then he heard the familiar clank of boots on the grated metal flooring of the hall. There she is. The door creaked open and closed again. In the dim lighting, he saw her lean heavily against the red metal behind her.
"Trinity?" he asked quietly through the semi-darkness. He saw her eyes look toward him, startled.
"You're awake," she breathed. Her voice was soft...much softer than it usually was.
"I never fell back to sleep." I held her gaze, but she didn't move from her position against the door. "Are you okay?"
She shrugged, looking down. She was thinking about something, but what that something was he didn't know. He wanted to know, though. Please tell me...
As though she could hear his thoughts, she swallowed and whispered, "My mother just died...my mother from the Matrix. I saw the whole thing." She looked up at him then. Tears that wouldn't fall glistened in her eyes. "I wasn't even supposed to be watching her...but I just had this feeling. She was shot, in an alley a block from our -- her -- house."
Before he could get up to go to her, she came and sat on the bed. "Morpheus doesn't know what I was doing." Of course, leave it to Trinity to think of her captain before herself.
"Hey," Neo said, stroking his hand comfortingly down her back. "Morpheus will never know." She looked up at him again, just relieved that he was there, as he continued speaking. "How are you?"
She gave a sarcastic laugh, more of a bark than anything else. "As well as can be expected. I just saw my own mother shot by a man who has nothing to do with anything -- a nobody -- and I couldn't do anything to save her. Even if I could have done something, it would have been too dangerous." Now the sarcasm was in her words.
"You know what?" Her lips curled up in a ghost of a smile. "My mom was the only person to keep up hope that I might come back after I was unplugged. She put up flyers and called the police...every day. She loved me so much...I was her baby..." She choked now, and had to bite her lip to keep her emotions under her tight reign. "She loved me, yet I couldn't do a thing except watch some stranger come up behind her and..." Her voice died off.
"Trinity..." Neo didn't know what to say. Instead he opened his arms and let her fall into them, snuggling her head under his chin.
"It's okay. I'm okay," she whispered. "She stopped looking for me five years ago...she finally gave up hope. And I'm glad."
He wrapped his arms tightly around her, offering the comfort she needed through the touch instead of words.
After a few minutes of that eerie silence, she asked, "Can you not sleep?"
"No," he answered honestly. "But I've never been one to go by normal sleep patterns." He felt her smile against his neck.
"My mother used to sing me her favorite song when I couldn't sleep...back when I was still a child. She had such a beautiful voice."
Neo could almost see the memory through her words. He closed his eyes to envision it better. A small girl curled up in bed, wrapped in a pastel comforter...an older woman with similar hair and eyes sitting beside her, stroking her baby's forehead, smoothing out the unruly strands of hair that fell into that angelic face, and singing softly to lull the nervous child to sleep... He had never seen Trinity's mother before, but he had somehow pictured the two of them having the same hair and eyes. Maybe he was right, but he would never know.
Then, breaking him from his thoughts, a light voice broke through the quiet air. Trinity was singing... How strange. He didn't know she could sing. But, just like she said of her mother, it was a beautiful sound.
"A star shining in a universe far away
My heart knows that we shall meet again some sweet day
And you, you will be the flame that burns in my breast
And oh, I know just by knowing you I was blessed
Yes I was truly blessed..."
As the lyrics floated quietly through the room, Neo closed his eyes again. For the first time in what had to be weeks, he slowly drifted off. Pictures of a woman he had never met darted around his mind, soon replaced with images of the woman in his arms. The woman who could withstand whatever was thrown her way and still keep her head held high. The woman that, though she had suffered a great loss tonight, would be nearly the same the next morning.
"Heaven, Heaven, oh waiting there for me,
Heaven, Heaven, oh always let it be..."
What a strange little thing this was... What an amazing woman she was. Who knew what would become of her once this stamina died off? Would she be the same, or would she crack? Which should he expect? Neither of them would ever know.
"So why, tell me why the good die young my old friend
I pray that heaven waits for everyone in the end
And love, love is how we cross that bridge to the light
A star, that is what you are in my darkest night
Be always by my side..."