Caith entered the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk. It was dim; a blue hue shimmered on the icy steel walls. The blue tint was accompanied by a deep orange tone that was reflected from the setting sun beyond the glass windshield. Carth was still piloting the Ebon Hawk over the oceans of Manaan, attempting to find a place to land on the watery world. Bastila was analyzing the navigation charts, and the blue shade lined her hair, intertwined by the ember glow dancing on her delicate skin. Caith smiled and paced his way over to the copilot chair.
"Oh, so you're going to help now, is that it?" Carth asked with a diminutive smile. His eyes appeared to be a faded red, coexisting with shimmers of fiery orange. The true color of his dark brown eyes was diminished by the overwhelming brilliance of the setting suns' strands of light.
"You know it." Caith answered, kicking his feet up onto the controls and linking his fingers together, sliding them behind his head. He looked over at Carth with a smirk. Carth chuckled, the two strands of hair that draped over his face, swayed back and forth casting dim shadow across his forehead.
"Great help." Carth shook his head and turned back to scanning over the ocean. Pink luminescent clouds drifted across the sky, which were escorted by purple and red shades that replicated their likeness. Caith smiled; he soaked in the glorious image before closing his eyes and relaxing. He felt the setting sun warm his face and chest, draping his skin in a warm blanket, leaving him feeling cozy and content.
Bastila turned away from the navigation charts and studied Caith. She smiled softly to herself. He was indeed strange, but was also a very attractive and pleasant man. Bastila sighed, her chin resting on her hand as grey-blue eyes reflected the sunset from beyond the windshield. Caith swiveled around in the copilot chair to face Bastila; she took a step back and swung her head swiftly to face the navigation charts, trying and hide that she had lost herself in his presence. Yet she couldn't hide the pinkish glow that lit up her face. Caith placed his hands on top of his head, his fingers sifted through his short, obsidian hair. He chuckled to himself as he watched Bastila and mused that she was adorable when she was embarrassed. The young man scanned over her for a while longer, examining the way she moved so gracefully, with such care and thought placed into every movement, every breath.
"Bastila, when we last talked you said you needed time to think… So?" Caith finally asked. He rubbed his neck, and then stroked his rugged and scarred chin, turning his head upward slightly. Bastila turned away from the Ebon Hawk's navigation charts to face Caith. The scar rolling down the corner of his right eye to the top of his cheek bone, still caught her eye. Caith realized Bastila's face was no longer glistening with a soft pink glow of embarrassment.
"You've been patient with me, haven't you? I suppose you deserve an answer. But you have to understand how difficult this is for me to say." Bastila glanced up into Caith's shimmering emerald eyes; Manaan's setting sun illuminated them marvelously. She lost herself in his eyes for a moment. Mere seconds later she realized Caith had nodded and was staring back into her own eyes. Caith felt so at ease, so exultant around her. His thoughts could be lifted simply by her very presence.
"Yes, I think so." Caith replied, still gazing into her highlighted gray eyes. Bastila stumbled franticly to form her thoughts into words. She tossed her hair, which was still pulled back in two separate strands. The sun swirled around her in an ember shine, echoing Caith's feelings of contentment and affection for her.
"With all my training, I should be able to control myself better than this, but you're nothing like I expected. You're not like any man I've ever met before," she began. "I find myself watching you when I don't mean to, thinking about you when I don't want to. It isn't supposed to be like this!" Bastila stated; her voice trembled, knowing that her emotions were forbidden by the Jedi Council. A slight smirk spread deviously across Caith's face, he rose to his feet, cloaking the paneled floor before him in a vast shadow. He took a step towards Bastila, his foot thumped against the tile, releasing a soft echo throughout the Ebon Hawk. Caith's face was shadowed by the warm glow from the setting sun behind him, his scar almost entirely engulfed in the darkness.
"Oh, really? Then what is it supposed to be like?" Caith grinned at Bastila, the expression easily visible on his shadowed face. His eyes glistened with confidence. Bastila's mind raced, but she stood her ground, refusing to let Caith win this battle. However, she already felt herself wavering, and her feelings for him bubbled to the surface of her mind once more. She fought to keep these feelings concealed, to remain true to the Jedi doctrines.
"I… I don't know! It shouldn't be so hard not to think of you. It should be easy not to think of you! I should have discipline! Jedi discipline! Every time I try to call upon all my teachings to calm myself, they fail me. You have such power, such passion! I do not know if it's due to the bond between us, but I am drawn to you." Caith's smirk lessened as he lingered on her words.
"Are you interested in me? Or my ability to use the force?" Caith asked eagerly, raising a brow. Bastila stood uneasily in front of him, feeling his presence swirling around her, begging her to give into her emotions, to release her concealed thoughts and feelings for him.
"The force is a part of you, as is you power, but that's not what attracted me to you. It's more than that. Maybe it's the bond we share; it gives us certain… intimacy." Bastila replied nearly immediately, as if she had given the conversation much thought. "If I could, I would return to Dantooine. I need to be away from this bond of ours. I need to weaken it. I need to be anywhere but near you! But Malak must be stopped; my own feelings are nothing when compared to that. Yet, I know this could affect the sake of our mission if it's not resolved – I can't let that happen!" Caith's smirk vanished; he could sense Bastila was uncomfortable, and he didn't want to make it worse.
"We could fly back to Dantooine, if you really need to."Caith replied, his confidence diminished. The man's gaze sunk to the shaded panel floor before him. Around his vast shadow, the ember glow of the sun, despite all hindrances, continued to dance upon the floor.
"And do what? I am needed here, just as you are. There is nothing more important than what we are doing. This is why we need to resolve this." Bastila huffed, her own gaze drifted to the swirling luminescence of clashing colors; red, orange, and a diluted violet spun around each other on the paneled floor.
"Bastila…" Caith started to reply, his voice was deep, soothing.
"I think… I think we should have some privacy for this. Come with me." Bastila interrupted him; she waved her hand and started down the corridor to one of the Ebon Hawk's bedrooms. Caith's confidence hurtled back, and he beamed hopefully as he exited the cockpit and followed her through the dim corridors, the sun being the only radiance to guide them.
"You're stronger than I am, and there is no point in telling me otherwise. You will be a great Jedi, I think - I hope. In some ways you make me feel weak, like I'm caught up in the wake of our destiny. But at the same time, you make me feel stronger, more alive." Bastila told him in the room they had chosen, though she did not make eye contact with Caith. She knew her train of thought would elude her if she let herself drown in his presence, his charm.
"And I feel more alive when I am with you." Caith smirked as he inched closer to her, the window on the left wall allowing the illumination to accompany them even in the secluded area. He was glad it did as it embraced them both in the dim ember glow, as well as reflected of the paneled walls and floor. Caith continued to vigilantly move closer to her, each step echoing softly throughout the entire ship.
"I realize now that these feelings are part of the bond we share. The Jedi Council surely realized this; they new my loyalty to the doctrines of our Order would be tested on this mission. By facing and overcoming my feelings for you I have learned a valuable lesson about control and the dangers of emotion. This is an important step in understanding the force. I'm sorry if this is not what you wanted to hear. But I felt it was important that you know that our… infatuation… was nothing more than a result of our powerful bond!" Bastila gently placed her hands on Caith's broad chest to softly urge him away from her; she could feel his muscles tense, even through his shirt.
Caith sighed in agony, his heart feeling like it was seized from his chest, leaving a gaping hole only to be filled by sorrow and ominous darkness. He dragged himself away from her, pacing slowly to the left end of the room. Caith slumped down onto the bed there, which was built into wall of the Ebon Hawk; he brought his knee close to his chest and wrapped his arm around it as he stared out the window. The setting sun glimmered on Manaan's oceans that seemed to drift on endlessly, and the rolling plains of ocean rumbled as waves crashed over each other, splitting into thousands of single droplets, only to form into one enormous beast again. Finally, he turned back to Bastila, glaring at the floor.
"So that's it then? It's all over?"His voice cracked slightly. Bastila strolled over to the bed and placed herself opposite of Caith. Resting her fingers on the bed, she curled them around the sheets as tears surfaced in her eyes. She was very heartbroken that she had to end this because she loved him like she had no man before. But, she could be exiled from the Jedi Order if she did not put an end to her feelings. There is no emotion; there is peace...
"I'm… afraid so. Although I suppose I should thank you for all you've done - for the lessons you've helped me learn." She replied, weeping silently as she watched the soft ripples in the ocean that the Ebon Hawk left trailing behind as it soared a few feet above the illuminated cinder waves.
"Great… you learn a lesson and I get dumped!" Caith placed his feet on the tiled floor and positioned his elbows on his legs, resting his chin upon his hands. Bastila raised her gaze to see his shadowed face; his hair was tinted with deep red, and a few strands of violet managed to glisten despite the overwhelming red swirls.
"I wish it could be otherwise, but you have to understand that this is the way that it must be. I am a Jedi, after all." She observed Caith carefully; a tear perched on the tip of her eyelash as she felt his feelings through their bond. She could tell without their bond that he was very depressed, and she was sure he could feel, and see her sorrow as well. Her eyes swelled and her throat clogged as the perched tear finally dripped off her eyelash and raced down her face, halting on her cheek.
"So I was just a stepping stone to you becoming a Master." Caith locked his eyes to hers. Bastila cleared her throat and struggled to make Caith realize this is the way that it had to be.
"Please, don't say it like that! You make it sound like I was using you! Don't you realize how difficult this is for me?" Bastila sniffed, gliding her fingers across her cheek and wiping the few stray tears away.
"Difficult for you? What about me?" Caith answered his deep voice on the verge of a growl.
"Why do you think I came to this conclusion? I know how hard this is for both of us! You just kept pressing forward, so I had to be the one step up and do the right thing! Besides, you're the one who can't face the truth! Malak must be stopped! How can we do that if we let ourselves be blinded by our feelings for each other?" Bastila snapped.
"We're going to stop Malak, Bastila. And we're going to do it side by side. No matter what - I promise." Caith shifted closer to her. Bastila refused to look at him, but she believed him, whether it was blind faith or hope, she believed him.
"You… you mean it don't you? But how can I be sure you're not making a mistake? No, I… I have to resist. I have to be strong for the both of us." Bastila gazed into Caith's eyes; he was merely a foot away, so she eyed him warily. As his face turned to hers, it emerged from the shadows to reveal a comforting smile.
"You know I'm right, Bastila." Caith declared softly. He was now merely inches away from her, and his eyes did not stray from hers; his gaze penetrated hers, seeing past the lies and the mask. Caith continued to move his face closer to Bastila's until her nose was nearly touching his own. His gaze softened. Bastila tried desperately to remove her gaze from his, but she couldn't break free from his warming stare.
"But I don't…I can't… I mean… Malak will…" Bastila struggled to contemplate the situation, the Jedi would surely disapprove. She knew what he was going to do, so she tried to gather her thoughts to stay true to the Order and wriggle free of his invisible hold on her.
"I love you Bastila, and I know you love me." Caith murmured, tentatively placing his hand on hers, expecting her to pull away. Bastila stared into his eyes, her thoughts drifting away and her heart melting as if it was candle wax. She knew what was going to happen next, but more importantly, she wanted it to.
"I…" Bastila started, wrestling to gather her thoughts back, but Caith interrupted her. He closed his eyes and leisurely tilted his head, tenderly placing his lips against her soft, full ones. Bastila's heart skipped a beat as his lips pressed against her own. She let herself drown in his presence, let herself relax and let her qualms seep out of her mind. Caith tenderly placed his scarred hand on her cheek, and she wrapped her arms around his neck in response. Her own eyes flickered shut at last and her final uncertainties escaped from her thoughts.
Gradually, Caith pulled away so his lips were less than a few inches away from hers, his forehead pressed against hers. Neither of them opened their eyes. Caith smirked, and lightly stroked her cheek with his thumb. Once again, his confidence rejoined him, followed by an engulfing presence of delight.
"I knew it," he teased; the setting sun danced upon their skin, surrounding them in a brilliant, fiery glow. Bastila disregarded his taunt and smiled delicately.
"Shut up and kiss me, you fool," she whispered, placing her hand on the back of his head and pulled him too her, uniting their lips once more.
The last flicker of light shimmered out of sight as the sun ducked beyond the endless regions of the ocean on Manaan, the quiet hum of the Ebon Hawk's engine calmed everyone within the ship. Caith slept with Bastila's head on his shoulder, and her hand was placed upon his chest while his hand was on her side. He drowsily stretched and sat up a few minutes later, awakening to a confused Bastila. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor in disbelief. She had disobeyed the Council… for love.
"We… we shouldn't have done that, it was wrong. The Jedi are not allowed to love!" Bastila stammered. Caith sighed, slightly irritated.
"Surely it can't be that bad." Caith grumbled in reply, standing to his feet.
"It was… it was a moment of weakness - when I kissed you… we shouldn't have… I'm sorry, no. I know we both wanted it but we shouldn't have given into our desire! We are Jedi! We can't act like this - not now. Not while we still have to deal with Malak! I'm… I'm sorry. I don't blame you, but it was a mistake. I have to get out of here before somebody sees us together!" Bastila rapidly stood to her feet and began to rush out of the dark room. Caith was barely able to make out where she had run to.
"Bastila, please! Wait!" Caith snatched her hand, but she jerked free, her panicked footsteps echoed throughout the ship and diminished as she ran to her own room on the other end of The Hawk.
Caith stood alone in the dark room as the woman he loved left him standing there – heartbroken. He sneered with clenched teeth, and allowed his darker emotions to overwhelm him, turning around rapidly to slam his fist into the wall, the action leaving a slight dent. The smash could be heard much more easily and sharply than footsteps. Caith snarled and sat down on his bed, glaring at the floor and cursing under his breath. One kiss… One kiss had pushed them farther apart than they had ever been before.