Summary: Tsuna and Enma get married. Reborn is enjoying the mess way too much.
Warnings: Underage Marriage (No Underage Sex), Papa!Reborn (Played Straight And For Laughs – Both Done By Reborn), Pre-0027, Reborn's Disguise Skills, Cats, Only A Little Bit Of The Wedding Is Actually Shown, An 'Enma and Tsuna Get Married' Fic But Enma Doesn't Do Much (Unfortunately), Ridiculousness, Shameless Self-Indulgence (do I even need to keep putting this one in the warnings?)
Disclaimer: Don't own KHR.
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How it happened:
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"Out of all the irresponsible, reckless things to do," Reborn intoned, gaze heavy, "You go and get married at age fifteen. And to another future mafia boss."
Enma quaked, shoulders hunched and head bent forward as Reborn's dark eyes settled on him.
Tsuna rolled his eyes, "Aren't you the one always encouraging me to do irresponsible, reckless things? One would thing that it would make you happy."
Reborn sniffed, "Don't take that tone with me, young man."
"And who said anything about marrying another future mafia boss anyway?" Tsuna's furrowed his eyebrows in confusion before his facial features blanked and he stared at Reborn, "Don't tell me someone arranged a marriage between me and some random mafia heir to secure an alliance-"
Reborn wacked Tsuna up the head with a rolled newspaper, "Neither your father nor Nono did anything of the sort. Now, cool your temper and don't go haring off to commit homicide."
"I wasn't going to kill anyone!"
"Keep telling yourself that."
"You still didn't say what this marriage business is about."
"You and Enma-" Enma squeaked, "-are getting married. Properly, this time."
"What?!"
"You heard me."
"B-but! When did we get married?! I'd remember something like that!"
"During your confrontation with Deamon Spade."
Tsuna stared incredulously at Reborn, "I barely had time to fucking breathe let alone get married-!"
Reborn wacked Tsuna with a newspaper again, "Tut, tut. You're picking up bad language from your future minions- err, friends. I need to have a talk with Gokudera, Xanxus and Squalo."
"Did you just call them minions?! Reborn!"
"You must have misheard, Dame-Tsuna. Now, about the marriage-"
"WHAT marriage?!"
"The one on the Shimon's island. There was an oath and a ring and everything. Well, except for a proper ceremony. But I guess I should be glad you two didn't, say, elope."
"God, I wish Enma and I had eloped!"
Enma inhaled sharply and broke into coughs.
Tsuna snapped his head towards Enma, worried, "Enma, are you okay?"
"I-I'll be okay. Hopefully."
"If you're sure." Tsuna reluctantly turned his head to look back at Reborn, "You still haven't explained when Enma and I even got married?"
"Oath Flames don't ring any bells?"
"But those were our flames."
"Your flames, your selves. It's the same thing."
"No, it isn't!"
There was a knock on the door to Tsuna's room, where the three were 'discussing' the situation, before it opened to show a beaming, sparkly-eyed Nana, "Tsu-kun! Is what I heard true?! You're married? And to Enma-kun?" Her smile widened, "And you need help to organize a proper wedding ceremony?"
Oh no, Tsuna paled.
Oh yes, Reborn's expression seemed to say, Wedding Preparations.
Enma curled up in a ball while Tsuna buried his face in his hands.
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Who wore the dress?
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Tsuna stood at the altar, ramrod straight. The sight of Reborn in front of him, disguised as the officiant and staring at him with a narrowed gaze, was the only thing stopping Tsuna from fiddling with his white dress.
It was tense five minutes before footsteps heralded Enma's arrival.
Tsuna twisted his head back to look. Enma, in his own white dress, was being escorted down the aisle by a suit-clad, severe-looking Adelheid. Enma and Tsuna shared commiserating looks.
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It was a Wild wedding night (not in the way you may think).
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Tsuna woke up, dizzy and tired, and rubbed his eyes before he sat up. A quick look at the clock at side of his bed told him that it was way too fucking early (3am) to wake up.
He looked around his room, wondering what brought him and Enma to share the bed, and why the hell the two were covered with napping cats.
His gaze landed on Reborn, intently staring at him.
"Reborn," Tsuna whispered, his voice hoarse from sleep, "I had the weirdest dream."
Reborn merely cocked his head to the side, silently telling Tsuna to continue, "You and kaa-san teamed up and organized a wedding ceremony for me and Enma."
"That was not a dream, Dame-Tsuna. I can't believe you didn't notice the ring. Look at your hand."
Tsuna gaped before raising his hand to look at it. The sight of his Ring of the Sky Version X greeted him. There was nothing else on his hand.
"Your other hand, Dame-Tsuna."
Oh, right.
He raised his other hand to look at it, and was met by the sight of a particularly gaudy-looking ring.
What the-? Who picked the rings, anyway?
"It wasn't a dream." Tsuna looked at the sleeping Enma next to him and noticed the ring on his finger.
Tsuna wondered why Enma was sleeping in his room.
"You're married, that's why." Reborn deadpanned, "It was decided that you two alternate spending nights in your rooms. This time, it's your room; next time, it's Enma's."
"Oh."
No, wait, not 'oh'.
"That doesn't explain the cats."
"You two had a Wild wedding night."
Wedding night? Tsuna's eyebrows knitted together, wasn't that when- Tsuna's face exploded into various shades of reds.
Five minutes later, when actual steam started to rise from Tsuna's head and Reborn deemed that enough entertainment, he responded, "You two didn't have sex if that's what you were wondering."
Tsuna inhaled sharply at the blatant way Reborn put it.
Reborn sniffed, "Just because I let you get married at fifteen, doesn't mean I'm letting you anywhere near sex until you're fifty. Or never, preferably."
Tsuna put his face in his hands, inhaling and exhaling. A few minutes later, he dropped the topic of Reborn's apparent Protective Parent-like response and returned to his earlier question, "The cats?"
Reborn shrugged, "Like I told you, you had a Wild wedding night. Your flames went haywire and you and Enma ran away in the middle of the reception, in your dresses, yes-" Tsuna winced at the reminder, "-then you two came across a group of stray cats and adopted them. Or they adopted you two, who knows." Reborn shrugged, "Congratulations, Dame-Tsuna, you're married with a family now."
Tsuna muffled his screams into his pillow.
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End.