NOT MINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
When I first saw Stacey I thought she was another fan girl but I was proven way wrong when I went up to them and he introduced her as his girlfriend. Well at least she did he couldn't seem to find the words to say. As soon as that awkward conversation was over I walked as fast as possible so he wouldn't see the tears that were about to fall. I couldn't believe he got himself a girlfriend, I mean I thought that we were going to try to see if we could get back to what we were but I guess I thought wrong.
Seeing them together was like a knife in my heart and I'm starting to realize that that's probably how Deacon felt all this time seeing me with Teddy. I try to stay focus for the rest of the day but my mind keeps going back to meeting Stacey. Bucky finally noticed that my thoughts were somewhere else told me to go lie down for a while. So I headed to my room to try to get some sleep but every time I close my eyes I see Deacon and Stacey together and I wake screaming and feeling sick to my stomach. When I realized that sleep was no longer an option I got up grabbed some paper and a pencil and decided to write a song. Writing always helped in the past when I needed to sort through my thoughts.
When I finished the song I had tear drops falling and getting absorbed up by the paper. I can't believe I finally lost Deacon after all the this time of him waiting for me finally gave up like he accused me of doing all those years ago. My heart has never hurt this bad before not even when Teddy asked for a divorce. I finally got myself to fall asleep and instead of nightmares of him and Stacey I had a dream of Deacon and me finally together. When I finally woke up the next morning instead of a smile on my face I had tears rolling down breaking the last piece of my heart.
My head was in the game more today than yesterday but everyone could see my heart wasn't in it so Bucky told everyone that we were done for today. When I was sure everyone was gone from the room I picked up a guitar sat down and started to sing my new song. What I didn't realize was that the person this song is for was standing off to the side of the stage.
Suppose I called you up tonight
And told you that I love you
And suppose I said I wanna come back home
And suppose I cried and said I think I've finally learned my lesson
And I'm tired of spending all my time alone
If I told you that I realized you're all I ever wanted
And it's killing me to be so far away
Would you tell me that you love me too
And would we cry together
Or would you simply laugh at me and say
I told you so
Oh, I told you so
I told you someday you'd come crawling back and asking me to take you in
I told you so
But you had to go
Now I've found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again
If I got down on my
knees and told you I was yours forever
Would you get down on yours too and take my hand
Would we get that old time feeling
Would we laugh and talk for hours
The way we did when our love first began
Would you tell me that you've missed me too
And that you've been so lonely
And you've waited for the day that I returned
And we'd live and love forever
And that I'm your one and only
Or would you say the tables finally turned
Would you say I told you so
Oh, I told you so
I told you someday you'd come crawling back and asking me to take you in
I told you so
But you had to go
Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again
Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again
Why did I make him wait for so long? Why didn't I talk to him after his birthday? Why did I give him the chance to meet someone else? I don't know how our roles got switched with standing on the sidelines watching the love of your life be with someone else. I don't know how Deacon survived for as long as he did. I mean I can barely make it through the day without wanting to break down and cry. When all my tears dried up I stood up put the guitar away and walked off stage back to my room. Tomorrow I will have to face the music of seeing them together, so I need to get all of my tears out of the way now because I refuse to look broken in front of him.