Originally posted on imagineverything-anything on tumblr.
Shion sighed and stared down at his pale, soft hands. Him and Rat had been dating for a few months now, they even had their own small yet comfortable apartment together, but Shion couldn't help but feel these insecurities and anxieties. They flowed through his brain over and over again with no hint of slowing down or stopping.
It was really starting to get to him.
He couldn't help it, nor did he want it. Rat hadn't given any clues or hints that he wasn't planning on staying or that he was going to leave him. But there was that unrelenting tug that Rat was going to leave him, and it was going to be sudden and painful. Just the thought of that happening made his eyes wet and his throat tighten.
Currently, Rat was at work. He had picked up a new job at the local Teaching Center of the Arts and taught kids and teens how to act and then picked out plays for them to perform. The pay was nice since some of the students had wealthy families and it was something that Rat was good at. Shion glanced at the clock and noted that Rat would be home any minute now.
Shion had just finished wiping his eyes and clearing his throat when the door opened to reveal his eye-rolling boyfriend. Rat was holding many papers that were stapled together and reading with a cringe on his face. He kicked off his shoes and joined Shion on the couch, throwing his arm around his shoulder thoughtlessly.
"One of the more well-off students, Isabelle, decided to write a play script when I had the kids brainstorm some plays they would want to do to see if their choices have improved," Rat said grimly with a sigh, "and her parents also contribute funds to the Teaching Center and they seemed to be very proud of their daughters work."
"Is it really that bad?" Shion asked, willing to talk about any subject to get his mind off his recent feelings.
"Terrible," Rat said with a cringe then set the script on the glass coffee table. He then turned to Shion with a smile and pulled him closer. Shion gave a sigh of relief and felt himself relax instantly against him, but then the thought that this may never happen again crossed his mind and he tensed.
"What's wrong?" Rat asked, his voice laced with concern.
Shion blinked and shrugged. "Nothing," he said quickly, not wanting to talk about it.
Rat traced small circles into Shion's side, the effect was calming. "Tell me," Rat said softly.
"It's stupid," Shion mumbled, his eyes focusing on the small crack in the outlet on the wall across from them.
"Nothing is stupid if it's bothering you," Rat said, his hand now rubbing up and down on Shion's arm. His concern was sincere, Shion could tell.
"I-I'm afraid that," Shion paused to take a breath of preparation, "you'll leave me." He muttered the last part, but it was crystal clear in Rat's ears. Suddenly, Rat grabbed Shion's shoulders and moved him so that they faced each other. Their eyes met, Shion's with fright of what Rat would say and Rat's with seriousness.
"That would never happen," Rat assured him, his eyes remaining the same intensity of seriousness. Shion looked away, his eyes already prickling. Instead, Rat grabbed his chin and turned his head.
"I would never do that, I would never leave you," Rat corrected, his hand making Shion look at him. Shion's eyes were obviously watering now, and Rat's face softened as he pulled Shion's face to his. Their lips locked, and the world faded away. All that raced through Shion's mind now was how much he wanted this, and how much he wanted Rat. The anxieties and insecurities faded along with the world as they held each other with passion and warmth. Suddenly Rat pulled away, his hand caressing Shion's face as he gazed into his eyes.
"Do you believe me now?" Rat asked, a small smile playing on his lips.
Shion smiled back with a quick nod just before leaning into Rat again, allowing the world to fade away once more.