Alright, well this is my first attempt at writing a fanfiction. I'm completely new at this and I'm totally not sure what I'm doing. :) So please be kind and review, comments and suggestions are always appreciated.

I do not own Vampire Academy. It's a good thing I don't because then the books would be horrible. :D All of it belongs to Richelle Mead.

This is more like a prolouge then anything else. Other chapters should be longer. ;)

Dimitri. Dimitri. Dimitri.

I see him every night in my dreams now. Sometimes he is Strogi and sometimes he is my Dimitri. And every night it is the same. I wake up gasping, turning on the light beside my bed. I groan and throw my feet over the side, groggily standing up and heading to the bathroom to throw some water on my face. This has been going on for awhile, ever since we saved him.

I know, I should be over him. It's not safe or smart to hold on like this. It's not nice to lead Adrian on. I love Adrian, he has filled the space in my heart for all this time. But I realize that isn't fair to him. That is why I broke up with him yesterday. He was choked up a bit, much to my surprise, I never pictured headstrong Adrian to cry. But then again I used to be headstrong, and now look at me. But, sincere people like Adrian, won't try and force you into anything. They won't make something into something that isn't there. And really? I couldn't lead him on when my love was here, alive, and just as real as ever.

Lissa doesn't know I have these dreams. My desire to protect her overpowers my own needs of comfort. There's only one person who could truly comfort me. And he is also the one person who has made it clear his love for me is no more. So I busy myself during the day, taking care of what needs to be done. There is a training area here in the court, that I go to whenever I start to feel depressed. There's a personal satisfaction in staking those dummies. I focus all my anger, hurt, and very being on my practices in which I do in complete private. I am a official guardian, but I like to keep my skills sharp.

The court has allowed Dimitri to roam, although not without supervision at all times. That makes it very hard for me to hide from him. Sometimes I think we run into each other just because we are so used to being close. Don't get me wrong, I can see his side. He is Dimitri Belikov, known as a badass Strogi fighter that turned evil against his will and killed so many of his own kind. And now he is back and fighting for the light side, for our side. He thinks he is a monster, no, he knows he is a monster. But I don't see it that way, in my eyes he is still a god, and my heart still belongs to him. I wish I could take away the hidden guilt in his eyes when he does look at me. I know he blames himself for everything that happened during my stay with him. And I can't push away the guilt in myself that enjoyed all of that.

"Rose!" I hear Lissa calling me from behind the glass window of the training room. I sigh and put my silver stake back in my pocket and head to the door. You can only escape reality for so long.

Lissa smiles as I open the door and she hands me a shopping bag from some famous Moroi designer that she loves so much. "Look in it!" she squeals happily and I quickly take a moment to asses her. She seems elated, and I briefly wonder if her and Christian recently had spent the night together. She seemed so stressful maybe all she had needed was a romantic night.

My gloomy mood turns to surprise as I pull out a totally sexy looking dress from the bag.

"You like it?" I hear Lissa gush excitedly. But I'm just a silent, unmoving stone. I know Lissa is trying to recreate our party times that we used to enjoy so much back at the school, but thinking of those times make me think more of Dimitri.

"It's wonderful." I reply simply, stuffing the dress back into the bag and handing it back to her. "But I'm not going to the party tonight, Liss."

"Of course you are! You are my guardian, and best friend! It'll be fun. You can wear that dress, we'll go get manicures and pedicures from Ambrose and then..."

"No Lissa." I reply firmly with finality. But then again that was before her next words. "Dimitri will be there."

I freeze, contemplating a response in my head. I know she is grasping at straws, she must be really desperate to get me to this party if she is playing the Dimitri card. I can't deny that all of a sudden this party sounds appealing. But I have to stop thinking about him, I can't let him control me like this even when he isn't here.

Lissa hands me the bag. "Think about it, please?" she pleads softly before walking gracefully out of the room.

I sigh and clutch the bag to my chest. I haven't decided yet whether I'm going to go. If I do decide, there will be some things I need to take care of first. Some things that nobody must know about.