SPOILERS ARE IN THIS FIC. This is a new story on a new account so hopefully it isn't too awful but I felt like writing and this was created. This is intended to have multiple chapters but it may stay as a oneshot as I'm not motivated very often (oops). There may be a few errors but I hope it makes sense. Just a short chapter to start with, I'll try to make things more dramatic later on :3
She stared at him from the other side of the ward, tilting her head as she observed him. The way he carried himself had changed, he was a man with the weight of the world on his shoulders. A soft sigh flowed from her mouth as she continued to stare; she couldn't stand the way he looked at her now. The silent accusation screaming at her from his pained eyes. This was her fault, it shouted. This was all her fault. She was the reason why there wasn't a Mrs Maconie irritating her on a daily basis, the reason why there wasn't a Mrs Maconie making those eyes of his light up with joy. He'd said it himself, she was poisonous. Toxic. Her touch like Midas', mutating everything she came into contact with.
She hastily turned her head around and cleared her throat as a soft voice came from behind her.
"He's not himself at the moment." The registrar sighed, crossing her arms and standing next to the slim consultant.
"Yes, thank you for that insightful comment, Maureen." Jac turned her head to reply, her voice staying level and emotionless in an attempt to end the conversation.
Mo continued regardless, speaking slowly, watching the other woman's face as she tested the water. "I heard about Emma-"
"I bet you did." Jac immediately spat back. "I'm glad that the grape vine isn't being given a chance to shrivel up."
"For the record I think he's wrong." Mo chewed her lip, keeping an eye on Jonny as he endured a lecture from an elderly patient.
"Excuse me?" Jac's reply came quickly, her eyebrows rising with her disbelief.
"You heard me." Mo muttered, not wanting to broadcast the betrayal.
"What did he do? Forget your birthday? Embarrass you in front of a family member? Take the last custard cream?"
"He's going through a tough time, he's not thinking straight." She butted in, needing to defend her friend. "He's hurting and that's why he's making mistakes."
"So that excuses him from wanting to take my daughter away from me?"
"No. But it explains it, doesn't it?" The registrar questioned, letting the question hang heavily in the air before clapping her hands together to diffuse the tense atmosphere. "Right, I better get on."
"Actually planning on doing some work today? There must be a blue moon." Jac quipped before walking away, ignoring the comments that the other woman had made. Mo shook her head in disbelief and walked in the opposite direction.
She gathered the end of her coat and sat down on the bench, spending a second to glance at the small engraved memorial plate which she quickly decided was too scratched to read. The hospital entrance was firmly within her sight, only a small, well-kept path and the car park road in her way. The soft breeze caused her wispy hair to dance and the overcast weather made her frail body shiver for warmth. With a deep breath she closed her eyes.
5 minutes on a library computer had told the woman on the bench all she needed to know. She was still here, still doing well. A consultant in fact. She was thriving. That was proof, wasn't it? They were better off without each other in the long run, if she hadn't left then she wouldn't have learnt how to be independent. She had done the right thing.
It'd been years since she'd last passed through those doors and back into her daughter's life. Their reunion had been short and not what most people would describe as sweet. But she came out alive, that had been all that had mattered at the time. She'd done what she'd needed to do and this trip, she exhaled loudly and convinced herself, was just as necessary as the last.
Jonny Maconie was in pain. He'd heard people flippantly use the term 'heart break' before but he'd always dismissed it, back then physical and emotional pain were two entirely separate concepts. With a snort and a shake of his head he acknowledged his younger self's naivety.
"Alright, Son?" Came the croak from Mr Johnson, an eighty six year old chain smoker whose heart and lungs had simultaneously decided that enough was enough.
"Aye, course." He replied immediately, working on autopilot.
A sigh from the older of the pair caused Jonny to pause, looking up from the points he was plotting on the chart.
"Nothing bothering you, is there, Richard?" The nurse asked out of obligation.
With a grumble the man in the bed sat forward, surveying his company with his wise eyes. "Ah, no, the drugs are doing their job alright." He quickly dismissed the worries. "But as the place is quiet I don't suppose you'd like a chat?"
Jonny looked around and found that the ward was practically a ghost town. No easy excuse for getting out of this one then. "Sure." He forced a fake smile as he slipped the file into its home on the end of the bed and sat down in the previously unoccupied chair. "I can spare a few minutes."
Richard nodded then quickly started his tale. "I've been a bit lonely since old Bets died. Fabulous woman was Betty. Used to wake us both up at five every day without fail for most of our married life. We'd have our breakfast and watch the sun rise together." He sighed, looking at the nurse with a grim look on his face. "It was the big C in the end. She stopped waking up so early, I made her go to the GP, had to force her. She was always funny about doctors. Well, it was too late." He paused, looking down at his wrinkled hands. "No one wanted her to suffer anymore. Apparently it was peaceful but I don't know how they know, it's not like they were inside her head."
"I'm sorry." Jonny sighed, letting his body slouch as he processed the man's words. The depressing news hadn't done anything for his mood, he gave the floor a stony glare, he shouldn't have decided to humour the old man. He'd had time with his wife. He was lucky.
"I did some crazy things after she was gone." Richard continued in a quieter voice, slowing down as he gauged his reaction. "Straight after the service I went to a shop. Spent three hours looking at alarm clocks, they had to throw me out in the end."
Jonny lifted his head to shoot Johnson a confused glare.
"I needed something to replace Bets. I couldn't be around anyone else, I turned against our friends. So for a while it was just me and that stupid alarm clock, waking me up at five each morning. But in the end things began to become okay. I let people in, stopped torturing myself, everything was more normal." A chesty cough interrupted his speech, leaving him a little breathless once he carried on. "My point is grief can do strange things to you-"
Jonny stood up sharply, his voice demanding. "Who told you?"
Richard sighed and shook his head. "That's neither here or there, son. But I just want you to know that you need to think about what you're doing- sort your head out-"
With a sharp shake of his head Jonny turned around, already starting to walk off as he called over his shoulder. "You- you have no idea how I feel!"
The old man sighed. The ward silenced. Jac's head snapped towards the direction of the commotion and Paula Burrows emerged from the lift, looking around with an outsider's sickening curiosity.
Thank you for reading, reviews would be lovely!