"She's in a coma"
It feels like a bucket of ice cold water has just been dumped over his head.
He's not allowed to visit her, that's reserved for family only. But he can see her threw the glass doors of the hospital. She's hooked up to wires and has something covering her mouth.
He should be the one in there. He should be the one in a coma. In a critical condition. He was the one driving the car.
He slumps down in one of the cold hard plastic chairs.
He remembers everything.
How happy she looked sitting next to him in the passengers seat, looking out the window at the mountain pass.
He remembers the music that was playing. Ariana Grande. Love Me Harder.
He remembers what she was wearing. Its the same she's wearing now, though now it's stained with blood. Pale blue skinny jeans. A black lace tank top. Purple Vans. And his sweater.
He remembers their conversation. They were talking about college. The future. One that may not happen.
He remembers her scream as the car tumbled off the road. The deadly silence. The realisation that she wasn't okay. And that it was his fault.
He remembers the way her body looked as they carried up to the ambulance.
He remembers holding her hand as they raced towards the hospital. Squeezing tightly. Willing her to open her eyes. Wishing on everything he has.
It's hours later. He still sits in the chair. In the same position.
They tell him not to give up.
They tell him to go home. Get some rest. But how can he when shes his home.
It's a week later when he's finally allowed to see her.
She still has that mask thing over her mouth.
She's still hooked up to a billion machines.
She's still asleep.
He visits everyday.
Saying nothing.
Just holding her hand.
A week later he brings in her favourite book.
If I Stay.
Its Ironic, really.
But he reads the first chapter none the less.
Six months later nothing much has changed.
Their on the last book in the If I Stay series.
She didn't own it. He bought it himself.
The last chapter he tells himself She'll wake before the last chapter.
She doesn't.
It's after.