Anakin Skywalker's P.O.V
I don't know what happened. I mean, I know what happened on Geonosis, and the war we are now fighting. There hasn't been a war concerning the Republic as a whole for about a millennium, but that's not the issue right now, at least for me.
Padmé
Padmé Naberrie Amidala, former queen now Senator was my issue. She was the reason I was sitting on the corner of my room in the Jedi Temple, tears coming out my eyes.
I told her my feelings, but she rejected me, saying that we were 'only friends', and that the Jedi 'weren't allowed attachments'.
I don't understand any of this! I mean, we could live in secret, but it didn't happen. Why didn't she give me a chance? We could've been good together! I loved her since I was very young, and when I finally confessed my feelings for her, she only rebuked it sternly.
I realise that we'll only be friends, and nothing else. But we would've been good together. I want her, and me to be together. But she wouldn't let me even have a chance!
Why didn't she give me a chance? That's what I don't understand, I don't understand it at all. Love is a complicated thing, I always knew that, but I never really got it until now.
Love is truly a complicated thing, it has a good experience to it, like you're in an eternal bliss, but it can cause huge dents or ruin friendships entirely, like Padmé's friendship with me was utterly ruined, just because I revealed my damn feelings!
I should have never opened my big mouth, if I hadn't, we would still be on good terms! And I wouldn't know this emptiness. Yes, heartbreak felt empty, completely and utterly empty.
Imagine a cup, now imagine the cup being filled with water, that's what it felt like when I saw Padmé before all of this, my heart being filled with love and happiness. Now, imagine that cup having a hole underneath, the water being poured passes through the hole and the glass is never full, since it all runs down the hole. That's what thinking of Padmé feels like now, my heart being filled with love and happiness, but it just runs down through the hole in my heart.
I'll never be able to let go of her emotionally. I mean, she was the only woman I had my eyes on! I wish I could wish my emotions away, but I can't! It's too damn difficult to let go of a woman you thought about for years, even if you weren't aware of it!
I loved her forever, and I always will. My emotions for her is not something I can easily leave.
I don't think I will love another woman. Ever. Some may see that as good since the Jedi Code does not allow attachment, but it's horrible, trust me. I'm forever punished and cursed to think about Padmé and me together and be forced to see her not with me.
She might go with someone else she doesn't have to hide her relationship with, so that might be good, but too bad it isn't me. If it would be me, then that would be great, greater than anything my mind could ever imagine, and I can imagine quite a lot.
I saw her with me in my dreams, heck, even in my daydreams, but it saddens me to think that my dreams will never come true. When I was younger, my dreams were to become a good, no, great Jedi and free all the slaves and erase slavery forever. Now, all I'll ever dream of is her and wonder what if she was with me and we were together.
If I see Padmé again, I want to ask her, 'Why didn't you give me a chance?", Why didn't she give me a chance? I would've taken care of her, and relished all the moments we were together. I would have been completely faithful to her!
Padmé, why didn't you give me a chance? Why Padmé? Why? That is the question I'll ask myself forever, why?
Why didn't you give me a chance?
Now, let me explain this story. This is inspired by events that happened on November 24th 2015. The events that happen in this fan fiction match the events that happened that day, with Anakin being me and Padmé being a friend of mine who I had and still have a crush on.
So here's what happened. A friend of mine (not the friend who I have a crush on) asked me who I like during lunch break in school, I gave him hints and he figured it out (much to my disappointment), I then wondered aloud about it, then the friend who I had a crush on was beside me when I wondered aloud about it, I told her the events, but without saying her name since I was too shy to tell my feeling to her. I told her "So I gave him hints about who I like, and he figured it out", she responded with "Well, if it's me, then we're just friends!", in a sharp tone. I realised that we'd stay friends, and this fanfiction was created out of my first heartbreak.
And to think that I created OCs based from myself and her. The OC based off me is called Adenan Kornen, and the OC based off her is Bethrona Da'atarka. And I made the two OCs fall in love in my story Yoda's Reformations.