I gaze out of the window, trying to get a glimpse of the trees we're speeding by. Dean, Sam and I are on our way to Washington to check out a vampire nest. Dean's going his average 20 MPH over the speed limit, always in a rush for a reason I've yet to figure out.
"Dean," I warn. "I don't think this is the appropriate speed for a road with this much ice and sharp turns on it." My warning had just about as much effect as I thought it would. Dean looked back at me, rolled his eyes and put his foot down even harder on the gas pedal.
I noticed my knuckles turning white from how hard I was gripping the door. Since losing the majority of my 'mojo', I'm not sure how my vessel will react if something were to happen to it. I glance up to look at the barely lit road ahead just in time to realize we were heading for a sharp curve about 40 MPH too fast. The Impala skidded on the ice and began rolling down the side of the mountain. We could have rolled forever, if it weren't for a large pine tree ramming into the right side of the car, just where Sam was sitting. My head bounced back against the door frame, causing my vision to go black and body to go limp.
A sharp pain in the side of my head brought me back to reality. I looked around, still sitting in the back of the Impala.
"Dean? Dean?" I begin, trying to wake the unconscious Winchester up. I gulp, dreading what I'd find when I looked to where Sam was sitting. I reluctantly peel my eyes off of Dean, moving them to the mangled metal and bloodied skin to my right. "Sam? Oh my… Sam! Wake up!"
It takes all of my strength to fight the angle of the hill and pull both Winchesters out. Dean wasn't a problem, but once I found Sam's body under the broken bits of the door and airbag, I knew I didn't have any time to spare.
It wouldn't be easy transporting them both at the same time, but it had to be done in order to save them. I wrapped the brothers' arms around my shoulder and concentrated as hard as I could on the closest hospital ER. Minutes later I found myself lying on a white floor, struggling to breathe, both Winchesters draped over me.
I coughed out a barely audible "Help" as I let myself drift off, yet again, into unconsciousness.
A warm pressure on my hand brought a smile to my face, and made me realize I was waking up. I'm not sure how long I've been asleep, but I can tell it's been a while by the ache in my back and how difficult the task of opening my eyes was.
My vision blurred into focus, revealing the hand-holding culprit. Dean sat in a chair beside my hospital bed, head dropped and hands wrapped around mine. My smile grows wider at the sight of this man uncharacteristically showing emotion and attempting to comfort.
I clear my throat in an attempt to wake him up. I'm startled a little bit by how quickly his head snaps up. My smile fades once I notice the bags under his eyes and bruises on his face. Dean gave a small smile, eyebrows still drawn together with concern.
"Cas… How are you feeling?" Dean says with the worried expression still on his face. When I didn't immediately answer, he added, "Do you need anything? Does anything hurt? I can call the doc to bring some pain meds…" He starts to get up to fetch a nurse for some medicine, but I grip his hand even tighter to keep him by my side.
His head travels to our interlocked fingers, as if he'd just realized we'd been holding hands the whole time. A small blush appears on his cheeks as he slowly pulls his hand away and puts it in his pocket. I move my eyes to the chair and back at him, silently asking him to sit.
"Hey." I choke out, my voice raspier than it's ever been. I cough a few times, trying to get my voice back to normal. With no success, I continue. "I'm fine. How are you feeling? What happened?"
Dean let out a breath of air at what I said. "I just have a few broken ribs and fingers. I've been through worse." Dean looked around the room, almost as if looking for a way to escape if things became too heated. "I uh… We got in a car accident… you, me and Sammy." He stopped and looked down.
A sudden image of distorted limbs flashes in my memory. My eyes go wide as I remember the condition the younger Winchester was in.
"Dean. What about… What about Sam?" I ask hesitantly.
Dean covers his face to contain a sob. His shoulders begin to shake and I realize he's crying.
I swallow, worry coursing through my veins. "Dean. What happened to Sam?" I ask again.
He lifts his head for a moment, bloodshot eyes locking with mine. I try to search those eyes, looking for the answer, but only finding fear and sorrow in them. He takes a pained breath, a tear sliding down his cheek before his head falls into his hands again.
"It's all my fault, Cas."