AN: This fic was a request by a friend. It's told from the point of view of Nick, the incredibly happy kid from Zim Eats Waffles. (Why is there no fic of him? He's awesomely freaky with his utter joyfulness.) I own nothing, this fic isn't profiting me, and all characters aren't mine. So sit back and enjoy this incredibly rare, oh-so-messed-up pairing.
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They tell me I should hate you.
They tell me you're dangerous, Gaz. People say you broke into one kid's house and stole his GameSlave. They tell me you beat up people and hit your brother. They told me you did all this for no reason. But I don't think that's it. I don't think you're really bad. You can't be dangerous. I mean, maybe you're a little mean and stuff. I just can't see you hurting me. I don't know how you used to be, I just know you now. And you saved me.
Why did you do that? Why'd you break into Zim's house and rush for me like you knew I was there? How did you know who I was? Before I lost my memory, were you my friend? I don't recall. I just remember waking up, having that horrid thing pulled out of my head, and my knees going weak. You dragged me out of the house anyway. It was like you couldn't leave me behind. Like you needed me to be okay. Everyone else says you just did it because you made a bet with Dib. They weren't there, though. They don't know what it's like to lay near lifeless in your arms and not have you give up.
My mom hasn't come for me. Neither has my father. They've forgotten me. You've put me up in your room and set your robots to attack anyone who comes in. A more negative person might call it prison and you my cell keeper. I just see it as my haven and my angel. You tell me that fuck it, if my parents don't come it's their problem and their loss. It helps a lot, a lot more than I can say. It helps knowing you'll be here for me when no one else is. It helps when you tell Dib off when he complains about me. Your presence helps. It makes me less insanely happy and more normal happy.
So since you helped me, I help you. Water? Video games? Fluff your pillow? Look, I was Zim's experiment for a while. I'm used to this. This is how I remember to show affection. This is what I know how to do nowadays. Ever since Zim wiped my memory, all I can do is smile so big it hurts and help you out. Not that you complain. You just roll your eyes at me and tell me it's overkill. I understand. You're still waiting for my brain to get back to normal so it won't feel so weird. So am I. Your snide remarks and insults actually help a lot in bringing the insane level of happy down to normal as I try to make you feel a fraction as happy as I am. It doesn't work, but I'm trying. Hopefully I'll stop smiling soon so I won't look so out of place at your house.
Whenever we go out, people tell me I should hate you. They say you're weird. So I'm weird by association. Weird, insane, off, not right, and a loser. They don't understand. None of them ever will. I don't think they'd believe me if I told them what I went through. They think you're holding me against my will or threatening me or secretly beating me. I don't even answer them anymore. They don't understand I was rescued. They don't understand I want to be by your side. You are the only thing keeping me from Zim's clutches. Even if I am your servant, you're my protector. These kids don't know what it's like to feel static happiness, to be maniac for weeks at a stretch and never come done. They don't know what it's like to have these out of control waffle binges and be unable to sleep for days. I don't hate you. I can't. You've stopped these problems just by being near me.
I love you.
I know you don't wanna talk about it. I've still got a lot of ups in me. I still can't function like normal people. It'd be stupid to talk about you and me now. I understand. But you watch, one day I'll work it all out of my system. One day I'll be just like everyone else, calm and even and normal. On that day I'll be your boyfriend instead. On that day I'll talk normal and without a giant smile. I'll take your hand without jumping. You'll look at me without rolling your eyes. Then we'll be Gaz and Nick, instead of the dangerous girl and the fool. On that day, everyone will see us and stare, but we won't care. You don't even care now what they say, and I'm caring less and less as I stop smiling all the time. As you clear my mind, I can see it now: the future. One day I'll be just like you, your shadow, and no one will ever make a comment about us being together again when that day comes. Sure you could be 'depressing' me. But I want you to. Maybe one day they'll see that.
On that day, they'll realize you're dangerous to my happiness.
Which makes you liberating to my soul.