Outside of the Krusty Krab, Sheldon J. Plankton, owner of the Chum Bucket, laments on his weeklong nightmares about whales. No one, not even Karen, his computer wife, didn't seem to be willing to help.
"What's the point of going on?" Plankton wondered. "I'll just be tortured for the rest of my life by that blasted whale!"
He then lay on the ground in the middle of the road.
"That's it, I'm done. Nobody cares about me. So, I might as well end my life right here and now. The 4:15 bus should be here any minute now."
Spongebob, who was mopping the floor saw Plankton in the middle of the road.
'Why is Plankton in the middle of the road?' He wondered. He decided to check and see what was going on.
"Hey, Plankton," Spongebob greeted. "Whatcha doing lying on the ground?"
"Go away, Cheese Head!" Plankton snapped knowing Spongebob would probably make things worse. "Can't you see I'm trying to get run over? Or better yet, just step on me as hard as you can, will ya?"
Spongebob shook his head "no".
"I'm sorry, Plankton, but that flies in the face of my good nature."
"That's okay," Plankton sighed in depression. "I'll just wait for the next bus."
"Okay…see ya," said Spongebob, with a concerned look on his face. He gave him one last look as he went back to the Krusty Krab.
"I gotta talk to Mr. Krabs about this. What Plankton's doing just doesn't seem right."
Meanwhile, Mr. Krabs was having the time of his life.
"Goodbye, Pipsqueak," He said with no signs of remorse, whatsoever.
Spongebob then entered the office.
"Mr. Krabs, I just wanted to let you know that Plankton's lying down on the street—for loin. In other words, he's planning to commit suicide."
"Really? He's a mess!" Mr. Krabs retorted. He then started laughing.
"Mr. Krabs, I know you and Plankton are both sworn enemies and all, but putting on a costume to frighten him? Isn't that taking things a bit too far?" stated Spongebob.
"May I remind you of the fact that you've disclosed the location of me safe, where I keep the secret formula?" Mr. Krabs snapped in retaliation.
"No need to remind me, sir. I've broken Rule #2 in the employee rulebook: Never give the location of the secret formula!" replied Spongebob.
"That's right, now get out," Mr. Krabs ordered.
"But sir, he's planning to take his own life out there," Spongebob explained.
"Hey, at least I'll have one less business rival to deal with," said Mr. Krabs. He started chortling again.
"Fine, I'll fix this myself!"
SpongeBob stormed out of the office, wondering what to do.
Outside of the Krusty Krab
"What should I do?" He asked himself. "This is just an all new low. Mr. Krabs shouldn't treat anyone like this, even if it is someone as evil as Plankton."
Suddenly, a demonic version of Spongebob appeared on his left shoulder.
"Leave that scumbag to suffer! He's nothing but a coward who tried to ruin Krabs for years."
Suddenly, an angelic version of Spongebob appeared on his right shoulder.
"That may be true, but what Mr. Krabs is doing to Plankton is still inhumane and heartless. Please bring Mr. Krabs to justice."
Suddenly, the angel and demon both disappeared as a paper airplane from above hit Spongebob in the forehead.
"WOW! Hey, what the heck is this?"
Spongebob grabbed the paper airplane and unfolded it. "Oooh, it's a note."
He started to read the note…
Dear Spongebob,
I saw this issue about Plankton trying to commit suicide and Mr. Krab's calloused reaction. I have an idea that will make sure that justice is served. First of all, after you read this, tell Plankton about this and have him read it. Then, tell him that it was Mr. Krabs dressed up as Pearl this whole time. After that, tell him that his best bet will be to call the police and explain what Mr. Krabs did to him. After that, you'll find out the rest for yourself. Make the right choice, Spongebob. You are better than this. You taught Plankton about F.U.N and even about teamwork! Good luck, SpongeBob.
Sincerely yours,
A fan of the past.
Spongebob was shocked at what he just read, but he decided to follow the instructions.
"Looks like the first thing I need to do is to tell Plankton about the note right away."
He then raced back to the driveway.
Meanwhile, Plankton was still waiting for the next bus to run him over.
"What does it take to get run over around here!?" He snapped, just wanting to end it all already.
"Plankton!" Spongebob greeted him again.
"What, do you have mud in your ears!?" Plankton shouted, losing his patience. "TAKE A HIKE!"
"Yes, I remember. But Plankton, please hear me out. I just wanna help you," Spongebob said. "I have something for you."
"What difference will it make?" Plankton stated. "I have no more meaning in life, ever since that whale started torturing me."
"Read this and see for yourself," Spongebob gave Plankton the letter and he started reading it. After reading it, Plankton's jaw literally dropped to the floor.
"You mean… Krabs was dressed up as that blasted whale just to get me to end my own life?" He asked.
Spongebob nodded.
"Why that conniving bottom feeder!" Plankton growled.
"Don't worry Plankton, I even know how you can get payback from him. Use this to call the police." Spongebob gave Plankton a miniscule cell phone. Plankton then notified the BBPD, telling them everything that Mr. Krabs was doing to him. It would be a bit before the police would arrive, so in the meantime, Plankton decided to confront Krabs.
Meanwhile...
Krabs was just in the middle of finishing his Pearl disguise again as he then let a sly gry stretch across his face.
"This is almost too fun! Plankton ain't even a challenge no more!"
"I don't think so Krabs!" Plankton shouted as he entered.
"Oh, Plankton. Back for more, aren't ya?" Krabs taunted.
"Cut the smart act Krabs, I'm no longer afraid of you," Plankton sneered.
"I ain't Krabs, I'm... uh, I mean... I'm Pearl, not Krabs." Krabs said.
"The jig is up, Krabs. I know all about the suit," Plankton said.
"What do you mean?" Mr. Krabs took off the mask.
"You were just dressed up as a whale, so you could push me to my breaking point." Plankton announced. "I have a witness too."
At that moment, Spongebob came in.
"Spongebob?" Mr. Krabs asked. "You told him everything?"
"That's right Mr. Krabs," SpongeBob replied, in a very firm and serious tone. "What you were doing was cold, heartless, and inhumane, and I am not gonna stand for it."
"Oh, watcha gonna do?" Krabs taunted. "Call the police?"
Right at that moment, the police showed up and stormed the Krusty Krab and surrounded Mr. Krabs.
"That's exactly what Plankton did," Spongebob revealed.
"Eugene A. Krabs," A police fish said. "You are under arrest for harassment."
"WHAT?!" He shouted as Officer Nancy handcuffed him and brought him to the car. "YOU CAN'T DO THIS! YOU CAN'T TAKE ME TO THE POKEY!"
"Tell it to the judge, Krabs," Officer Nancy replied. She then proceeded to recite the Miranda Rights.
The two officers then drove off with Mr. Krabs. Spongebob and Plankton proceeded to get ready for court and contacted their local peers of Bikini Bottom to attend Mr. Krabs' hearing.
Some time later at court, all of Spongebob's peers, such as Larry the Lobster, Mrs. Puff, Sandy Cheeks, Gary, Patrick Star, Squidward Tentacles, Pearl, and of course Spongebob and Plankton themselves, took their seats in the jury section, witness and plaintiff stands respectively. The judge, Horace A. Whopper, banged his gavel.
"Court is now in session," Judge Whopper announced.
"WAIT!" A voice shouted, getting everyone's attention. It was a bespectacled human girl with brown hair, wearing a black wetsuit with red highlights and flippers.
"Allow me to help," She said.
"Who are you," Spongebob asked.
"Allow me to introduce myself," The girl said. "My name is Olivia Hayden. For your information, I'm the one who wrote that letter to you, Spongebob."
"Why, though?" Whopper asked Olivia.
"Because I saw how the original scenario was to play out, and it wasn't a pretty sight," Olivia explained.
"Huh?"
No one knew what she was talking about.
"Nevermind, I'll explain later. Anyhow, let's this trial started." Olivia explained.
"Now court is in session!" The judge announced.
"As you should know, your honor," Spongebob explained. "The Defendant and Plantiff have been rivals for years, as Plankton was always trying to steal the Krabby Patty top secret formula. If you must know, this particular incident all started when Mr. Krabs found out about Plankton's fear of whales, and his bad experiences spanning from documentaries about them. Mr. Krabs decided to take this to the next level and tormented Plankton by dressing up as his daughter, Pearl, to get back at him for antagonizing him for all these years. At that point, Plankton decided to try to let himself be run over, since he felt that had no meaning to his life anymore."
"I see," The judge said. "Is that it?"
"Yes, your honor," Spongebob said, bowing in respect.
"Okay, then. Ms. Hayden, call up the first witness to the stand." Whopper commanded.
"Certainly," Olivia replied. "I call up to the stand… Patrick Star."
The fish in the Jury section gasped, as Patrick went up to the stand.
"Now Mr. Star, answer this: What do you think of Mr. Krabs?" The judge asked.
"Hmmm, he's red, sweaty, a cheapskate, and he's a big, fat meanie weenie," Patrick whined. "He didn't give me my extra Mayonnaise that I asked for."
"WHAT!?" Mr. Krabs snapped. "You never asked me for mayo!"
"MAYONNAISE IS MY FAVORITE, OKAY CRAB CAKES!?" Patrick snapped back. "Not only that, but he got me banned from the Krusty Krab for uuuuuhh…How long was I banned again?"
Olivia facepalmed.
"Four months," she stated.
"Four months." Patrick repeated. "Even though I'll admit it is my own fault, he didn't need to ban me." *
"Now Mr. Star, do you think it was wrong of Mr. Krabs for what he did to Plankton?" Judge Whopper asked Patrick.
"I dunno," He said. "I wasn't there, but I will say this: he knows how to be a real jerk."
"So that's a "yes", right?" Olivia asked.
"Uh huh," He said, confused. As Patrick was issued to leave the stand, Olivia then decided to call up more people, one by one...
"What did Mr. Krabs do to you, that showed that his money addiction was getting worse?" Olivia asked.
"He never gave me my daily paycheck after Spongebob's third year working in the Krusty Krab," Squidward answered.
"He tried firing Spongebob for doing karate," Sandy confessed. "Plus, during the whole 'Krabby Kronicle' fiasco, he forced my best friend to write nothing but lies about us!"
"Daddy went through his way to torment Plankton," Pearl said. "And by the way, I hate eating plankton! I'd rather eat kelp!"
"Mr. Krabs went on a date with me which was good," Mrs. Puff said. "But he stopped contacting me after that!"
"Meow!" Gary meowed.
"Your right Gary," Spongebob said. "Mr. Krabs was known for being a cheapskate, like how he held all those jellyfish hostage, and trying to poison Health Inspector Yellowtail. He also wanted me to sell an expired patty, which was a direct health code violation. Then there's that whole Krabby Land scheme, and the wishing well incident. He fired me in a futile attempt to save a stupid nickel. He tried to put me in a 'chef exchange program 'which lead to him having his customers eating from the floor after losing all of his money; another health violation. Plus, as Squidward mentioned, Mr. Krabs stopped paying me after year three. Worst of all, he just tried to push Plankton to his breaking point!"
"Meow!"
"I agree Gary, he at this point, just might be as bad as Puffy Fluffy. If not, even worse, and I still haven't forgiven myself for letting that deceptive, little monster in my house," Spongebob confessed.
"How about you Plankton?" asked Olivia. "Anything else you would like to add?'
"His dishonest newspaper articles almost cost me my restaurant!" shouted Plankton. "And I thought I was evil."
"That's not all, Plankton," Olivia stated. She then left the courtroom.
"Wait, where's Olivia going?" SpongeBob asked.
A few minutes later...
Olivia rolled in with a Computer Projector and a Projector screen.
"After SpongeBob exposed the Krabby Kronicle for the pile of lies it was, the agitated former customers took back their money. However, he then decided to commit a federal offense: counterfeiting. Using the same printing press he used to create the purposely inaccurate newspaper, the defendant created several copies of $1 and $5 bills."
Olivia then pulled something out of her pocket.
"For example, here is one of each counterfeit bill that was manufactured." Olivia holds the two bills up. "Spongebob, can you hand me some legit bills?"
He does so, and Olivia holds them up as well.
"See the difference?"
The jury shook their heads 'no'
"Then allow me to give you a better look..."
Olivia turned on the projector. She then placed the counterfeit bills on the projector. An image of the dollar bills appeared on the projector screen…
"As you can see, when compared to the real bills, the fake $1 bill is thicker," Olivia stated. "What's more, the tiny red and blue fibers are completely absent and to top it all off…" She turns the bill over. "The arrowheads are blurry."
She placed the real and faux $5 bills onto the projector.
"As for the $5 bills, they suffer the same problem. Thicker, no red and blue fibers, and worst of all, there's no watermark."
Olivia turned the projector off, removed the bills, and returned the real ones to Spongebob.
"It's one thing when your feuding with each other, but what Mr. Krabs did to Plankton was just inhumane and I didn't think he would stoop to such a low level…until now."
"SpongeBob, are you trying to say you're supporting that tiny freak?" Mr. Krabs asked.
"In this case, YES!" SpongeBob retorted.
"In that case, you're fired."
"NOT SO FAST!" Olivia shouted. She pulled out a brown hardcover book and opened it. "According to the Krusty Krab handbook, if an employee ends up performing a task that may be considered a feat in itself, such as preventing a suicide attempt, that particular employee is actually eligible for a promotion of the employee's choice. Meaning, you're essentially breaking one of the very rules YOU established!"
Mr. Krabs grumbled under his breath. He was then called up to the desk to speak.
"So, Mr. Krabs, is this all true about what you did to Plankton?" Olivia asked.
"Yes, it's true!" he snapped. "That worthless little shrimp should have let himself be run over!"
Everyone then glared at him. Some of the people were even referring to Mr. Krabs as a cold and heartless cheapskate. As everyone was making not-so-nice comments about Mr. Krabs all at once, the judge then slammed his gavel.
Two hours later...
"All rise!"
Judge Whopper turned to the jury. " Have the ladies and gentlefish of the jury, reached a verdict?"
"We have your honor. We the Jury find the defendant, Eugene A. Krabs, guilty of all charges, including harassment, multiple health code violations, attempted second-degree murder, and counterfeiting!" Evelyn answered. *
Mr. Krabs swallowed hard.
"Well, Krabs, there you have it," The judge said. "Now the punishment…"
Olivia proceeded to whisper a suggestion about what would be a good punishment for Mr. Krabs. The judge then turned to the defendant.
"Eugene Krabs, as punishment for your actions, you are hereby sentenced to 42 years of the following events:
The plaintiff, Sheldon J. Plankton runs the Krusty Krab for one whole year, and you both will get a 50-50 split of the profits,"
'No.'
"All the items on the Krusty Krab's menu will be given out for free for the first 48 hours of your sentence."
"No."
"All of the counterfeit money you manufactured, and the printing press you used, will be confiscated and destroyed, on camera."
"NO!"
"A collaboration between Bikini Bottom's best mime and Doggy Williams will be shown live at the Krusty Krab."
"NO!"
"And to top it all off, not only will you be forced to watch this for yourself, but once you reach the halfway mark, you will spend the rest of your sentence in Bikini Bottom Federal Prison!"
"...NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Mr. Krabs cried out to the heavens.
"COURT IS NOW AJOURNED!" Judge Whopper declared. "Take him away."
Two security guards grabbed Mr. Krabs and proceeded to drag him out of the courthouse.
"WHY!?" Mr. Krabs sobbed.
"That's what happens when you trade what little morality you had for illogical amounts of GREED!" Olivia shouted. "Seriously! Spongebob stuck up for you once when you almost killed yourself from eating that expired patty, and you sold him out for 62 cents? YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!"
"That's right!" Spongebob said.
"YEAH!" All the citizens of Bikini Bottom rejoiced. Everyone then left the courthouse and went back home.
The first working day of the New Year
At the Krusty Krab, Mr. Krabs was currently going through his punishment.
"I'll have one Krabby Patty and a copy of Cheapskate Alert: How to Spot a Counterfeiter, please?" A customer asked.
"Coming right up!"
Plankton got a fresh Krabby Patty and a DVD copy of the aforementioned movie. "Here you go,"
"Thanks."
Cheapskate Alert: How to Spot a Counterfeiter, was a documentary created during the six-month time gap between Mr. Krabs' conviction and the first day of his sentencing, which was now. It entailed what a counterfeiter was, how they affect the economy, and how to identify and prevent counterfeiting. The opening contained footage of the counterfeit money Mr. Krabs created being incinerated.*
The customer then left happily, ready to see the newly crafted documentary.
"THE TORMENT!" Mr. Krabs yelled as the Mime and Doggy continued with their performance. "M-M-MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"
"Not a chance, Krabs!" Olivia stated as two BBPD Officers were holding him by the eyes as the corrupt owner of the Krusty Krab was also strapped to a chair, and was therefore forced to sit through the ordeal.
"Plankton, you're not going to be stealing that formula or trying to rebuild your regime, are you?" asked Spongebob.*
"Nah, I don't need that anymore," Plankton admitted. "Krabs' suffering is good enough for me at this point. Plus, I'll finally be able to renovate the Chum Bucket."
"Yeah, he deserved it for trading his morality for cash," Olivia stated.
"Hey Mr. Plankton," Patrick said. "I'll have one Krabby Patty, a copy of Cheapskate Alert, and a jar of Mayo please?"
"Coming right up," Plankton then gave him exactly what he wanted.
"Thanks," Patrick started admiring the jar of mayo. "My dear sweet mayo, I'll never let you outta my sight."
"Well, things are much better now," Spongebob commented.
"Well, my work here is done," Olivia said. "I think I'd better return to the surface world, where I belong."
"Wait, before you go," Spongebob began. "What were you saying before about 'the original scenario not being a pretty sight'?"
"Well the original scenario was cringe-worthy and hard to watch. Basically, it has Mr. Krabs gets off practically scot-free!"
"And this 'Stephen Hillenburg', created the 'universe' we're in?" Spongebob asked.
"Yeah. He was a genius, too; he was its keeper for several months, before being pressured to come up with more scenarios and as a result, renew it. Sadly, the pressure was too much for him and he temporarily left, leaving his overlord's two lackeys, Zeus Cervas and Casey Alexander to pretty much create the cringe-worthy scenarios such as the one I just mentioned."
"I see." Spongebob decided that it would be easier to just go with what she said. "By the way, Olivia. How are you able to breathe underwater without an air helmet?" He asked.
"Simple," replied Olivia. She pulls out a small pack of gum. "Neutronic Air Gum, Model 2.0" This is a remodeled version of the original Neutronic Air Gum."
"Jimmy gave you that?" Spongebob asked.*
"Yup," Olivia replied "When he saw when Squidward developed Infantile Amnesia and how Mr. Krabs disregarded Squidward's safety completely, Jimmy decided enough was enough. * He gave me his first pack of Neutronic Air Gum, Model 2.0 and asked me to stop any more of these moments or unfiltered cruelty from being spawned."
"Great." Spongebob said smiling.
"Well I guess I'd better get going back to the surface world, where I belong," Olivia stated.
"Okay, goodbye Olivia," said Spongbob.
"Goodbye!" Olivia replied. And with that, Olivia started swimming back up to the surface, while Mr. Krabs continued to suffer through his punishment. Plus, Plankton's was opening up to Pearl, which was the first step to overcoming his fear of whales. But most importantly, Spongebob felt like he accomplished something; especially since he was now the general manager of the Krusty Krab.
THE END!
So, there you have it; my version of Parent12D's alternate ending of One Course Meal, the worst episode of Spongebob Squarepants ever made.
As you can see, I tried to emulate as much of Parent12D's version as I could. However, as I didn't want to get slapped with a report for plagiarism, I had to make some differences:
The insert- Instead of Andrew, I decided to use my OC, Olivia Hayden, who will appear in Winx Club: Hunt for the Sisters of the Dark Dragon. Olivia is a big Star Wars geek and recreated working versions of the weapons in Star Wars Battlefront: Ultimate Edition.
Who's Evelyn?- Evelyn is the pink fish with the red bra and skirt seen in Band Geeks. As revealed in the episode her son Jimmy was trapped in a fire and saved.
Also, I had to make a reference to the first Spongebob movie.
Additional Crimes: I also referenced some of the things in my opinion, many people ignore because of Mr. Krabs nearly driving Plankton to suicide. Seriously, does everyone forget that Mr. Krabs fired Spongebob to save a simple Nickel, or the time he and Spongebob along with Officer Nancy sent Health Inspector Yellowtail to the Hospital? Also, there's the time he made counterfeit money using the same printing press that he used to create the now discontinued "Krabby Kronicle". I decided to show that the money is fake by having it and look feel different from legit bills. Then there's the time he permanently banned Patrick from the Krusty Krab. Finally, there's the ending of Le Big Switch. Because literally eating from the floor is a definite health violation itself, I decided to have this included also.
The next problem is how inconsistent Mr. Krabs has been in the series. At one point to keep his job, Spongebob had to pay Mr. Krabs $50 an hour, instead of vice versa.
Also, if I had recycled the original ending, guess what? Spongebob would not be able to keep his house! Seriously, 10,000,000,000 years!? Parent12D has no knowledge on how business or the justice system works! The Krabby Patty ingredients themselves cost money. Profits from the restaurant are what give the employees their pay.
I had to make a reference to the Nicktoons Crossover video games in some way to replace the air helmet because in reality, no one would be able to hear Oliva speak through it.
However the biggest change is...
The grammar: Seriously, Parent12D has absolutely no idea how the English language works, at all! Run-on sentences as far as the eye can see, Engrish up the wazoo, it's a complete mess. Here are a couple of examples:
"Because I know that you are in a cartoon, and the actual episode One Course Meal was terrible, so I wanted to make this interesting."
"NOT SO FAST! According to the Krusty Krab handbook, if an employee ends up helping someone who is depressed and attempts suicide, the manager is NOT ALLOWED to fire that particular employee no matter what."
Now that...is just pitiful.
This was hands down, the biggest problem I faced, but I still managed to pull it off. For that, I personally send a shoutout to Ms. Ritt and Mrs. Sanders from Harold Washington College. I can't thank you enough.
So that's it, and I hope you enjoy this remake. ;)