Hey guys,
a really short story which came to my mind when I wanted to write a FSK18 story for my German NCIS fandom. I love it when Ziva makes mistakes with the language. So I hope I haven't made too many mistakes, maybe even my idea is wrong from the start, given that I'm not a native speaker. Feel free to correct!
Yours, NCIS-Lady
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Dirty Talk
„Oh shit!!!"
Tony lifted up his head, trying to localize where the angry yell had come from. It wasn't difficult, though. He set is eyes onto the dark-haired woman at the desk next to his own.
"Problems, Ziva?"
"I'm gonna give this fuckin' piece of crap a right kick in the ass, this sucks, I hate it!"
"Ziva..."
"Oh shut the fuck up Tony!! Dammit! I'm gonna call this son of a bitch and..."
"Hey", muttered a soft voice from the elevator door. Gibbs entered the office, carrying a coffee mug. "I don't want to hear such words from anyone but me, okay?"
Ziva sighed deeply and threw Tony, who unsuccessfully tried to suppress his laughter, a glaring look.
"Sorry Boss. I know you don't like it, but I guess I just need my daily share of dirty talk..."
"Do you?", said Gibbs, raising one eyebrow in sheer amusement.
"Gives me a kind of satisfaction, I suppose."
Tony grinned widely.
"Time for confessions, Ziva?"
"What?!" She stared at her colleague in bewilderment. "What the f... ehm, I mean, would you be so kind to tell me why you're grinning as if McGee had just stripped on Abby's lab bench?"
With folded arms DiNozzo was leaning against the back of his chair, enjoying Ziva's confusion.
"You know what, Ziva? If that's what you call Dirty Talk – then I'm glad for rule number 12!"
"I don't know what you intend to tell me, DiNozzo, guess it isn't important then?"
Tony shrugged.
"Maybe it is. Just in case you don't want the whole NCIS to know about your sexual habits. We already know that you're... loud. But I pity your lover. Being kicked in the ass shouldn't turn him on, I guess. Except..." He looked disgusted. "Well, that's the point where I should stop thinking."
"Holy shit, Tony, what the fuck are you talking about?", Ziva shouted angrily, ignoring Gibbs who was grinning nearly as much as DiNozzo.
"Hey Ziva, no vulgar language in here!", warned McGee who had just entered the room and didn't understand why his male co-workers burst out in laughter.
Ziva narrowed her eyebrows, glaring at Tony and Gibbs.
"Okay, you can stop it, I got it now. Funny, really. Now where exactly is the difference between vulgar language and dirty talk, ha? No wait, I..."
"Fancy a private lesson, Ziva?", said Tony, smirking.
"...don't want you to tell me. Honestly."