Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha or its characters. I earn no profit from this work.
A/N: Edited/Updated – July 2016
Hello, all. I have been systematically editing, rewriting, and updating this story. I have been aiming to complete it for some time, but the muses and headspace have been gone for a long time (I started this 9 years ago!) and I am reorienting myself with this little divergent universe because I really do love and miss it. Much of the original content and dialogue remains, but there are scenes where I've done some rewriting, either subtle or extensive, to improve them. So, I will be periodically reposting chapters as I go and hopefully be able to give it a conclusion worthy to any and all that have read and supported this story. (I am also cross-posting this to AO3!) Thanks to all of you!
Love, Reux
Chapter One
"The story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye. Love is hello and goodbye…until we meet again." – Jimi Hendrix
Even though she was smiling, the expression reached no farther than her lips. Her eyes glittered like a pair of umber gems and the cause wasn't the brilliant sunshine kissing her smooth cheekbones, but from the watery veil of unshed tears threatening to waterfall down her porcelain skin. A single wavy tendril escaped its confines behind her ear and swept across her profile in the breeze, snagging on her moistened lips as if it had suddenly dropped anchor.
He could see the inner struggle plainly in her face, urging herself not to reach up and tuck the rogue lock of hair back to where it belonged. It was a habit when she was upset or unsettled to tediously pick at herself or her clothing in order to soothe her frayed nerves. Realization hit at that moment, and he knew that by throwing away those idiosyncratic notions of control meant that this time was monumentally more serious than he'd first assumed. The idea sent his stomach rocketing upward and lodging tightly somewhere in the vicinity of his Adam's apple. There would be no compromise, no until-next-time, and that knowledge made him almost violently ill. He had to stiffen his spine and swallow awkwardly, sweat breaking out on his brow, just to stop himself from crumpling to the ground and retching right there in the grass.
If she'd noticed his panic at all, she didn't acknowledge it, and only continued to smile somewhat grimly at him. Then, almost like an afterthought, her eyes softened and a pair of liquid crystals slipped free.
The sight of them hit him like a swift kick in the gut – later he would realize a swift kick to the balls would have been much more appropriate, but she was never the type to hit below the belt. Outwardly, the only reaction he gave was the occasional held breath and flicker of his rich amber eyes. He knew his face was displaying the same devoid mask of expression he sported when confronting the multitude of violent demons one meets while on a quest for Sacred Jewel shards. It wasn't really a conscious decision on his part, more like a finely honed survival instinct. Showing any sort of emotion in battle could be deadly, but there was no fight here.
Now he needed those expressions more than anything, but all he seemed to manage was the same harshly, blank stare - one he knew Kagome could see right through.
Hesitantly, almost oddly tender, he reached out and rested his clawed fingers on her arm. "Kagome, I-" At the sound of his muted voice, she clamped her eyes shut, spilling more tears as she released a nearly silent sob. The hushed cry made his stomach roll and sent his heart skipping. Her pain was almost tangible and it tortured him to the depths of his soul to see her this way. "Please, Kago-"
She picked up her head and reached out with her free hand to delicately press her fingers to his mouth. "Don't." The reedy quality in her voice stilled any attempts of speech as he found himself dangling frantically in agonized suspense. Her touch was feather light and when she continued to speak, shifted into a fervent caress of his cheek with the petal soft pad of her thumb. "Don't speak an empty excuse in lieu of an honest answer." She pulled in a shaky breath. "It wouldn't be fair to either one of us." She pulled her hand back and wrapped it tightly around its partner as if to stop it from idle wanderings. "I don't want to leave-"
He lashed out and snatched her by the shoulders. "You're leaving?!"
She bit her lip and looked away, struggling to control her halting shivers. "Yes."
Her entire body was trembling beneath his touch and he suddenly realized his shout was more equivalent to a slap across the face. He gently loosened his grip, grimacing at the marks left on her clothes. He knew well that the fine claw marks had also reached down to her skin through the thin blouse. Bowing his head, he shut his eyes guiltily. "I apologize."
She sniffed delicately and softly massaged her shoulders. "It's alright, I'm not hurt."
"What the hell are you talking about?! I know that I just..." He blinked stupidly at her growing grin, "Practically...what?" The sadly affectionate smile on her face shut his mouth with an audible clip.
"Same old Inuyasha, indignant as ever." She stepped forward, closing the distance between them, and fixed her gaze on the infamous prayer beads hung around his neck. "I'm always telling myself that it's one of your worst qualities, but I can't help but love it anyway. You wouldn't be you without it, and I..." She buried face against his neck and wrapped her arms around his waist, holding on as if her life depended on it.
He froze, suddenly unsure if he'd been meant to hear her murmured "love you", then slowly brought his arms around to pull her against him tighter when he decided that she hadn't. "I wish you wouldn't go."
Her small hands fisted themselves in his fire-rat kimono as she let out a shuddering sigh and started to pry herself away. He memorized the feel of her in his arms for a moment before relenting and allowing her to step back. She didn't go far, staying close enough to rest her hands on his chest. "I have to go now, but I will be back." Her tone was pensive as her fingers ran back and forth on the surprisingly soft cloth. "I will see you again, and in time perhaps you will find the answer to my question."
It hadn't really occurred to him how beautiful she was until this moment. It amazed him just how loving and patient she could be at such a tragic moment – his own hurt felt as if it were suffocating him and he knew hers had to be infinitely more poignant. Blinking down at her, he felt a shock of fear at the idea of disappointing her a second time. "And what if it's still the wrong answer?"
The new wave of silent tears made him want to bite back his words. She worried her lower lip for a moment, and then just sighed. All the tension he felt vibrating through her slight body vanished in the span of a second – like she shut off some kind of internal energy switch. Smiling once more, she gazed up at him. "In time."
She shocked him further by then slipping her hands to his neck, leaning forward and claiming his mouth.
His eyes widened at her uncharacteristic boldness, but he quickly succumbed to her touch and shut his eyes. She kissed him softly, lips smooth as satin, and he allowed her this moment without moving but his own mouth pressing back. In the back of his mind he knew she needed this contact in order to let him go, and he mourned the thought. There was still a part of him that hoped she'd change her mind and stay. And, despite its chaste nature, her kiss heated his blood in a way that actually scared him. He chased after her taste as she pulled away. "Kagome..."
She managed to hold back fresh tears and slid her hands up to caress the velvety softness of his ears. The effect was instantaneous; his head drooped in pleasure and he sighed contentedly, nerves instinctually soothed. She knew just the right way to make relax. All the anxiety he felt melted away and his heart slowed down to a steady, almost lazy thump. The second after she was done, he'd curse her for rendering him so completely helpless from stopping her.
His head continued to droop until his ears were nearly level with her mouth. This time when she spoke, it was calm, clear, controlled, and uttered so tenderly it would haunt him for years. "Goodbye, Inuyasha."
When the warm, buzzing euphoria left him, she was gone.