'Don't wait for your ship to come, swim for it.'
That's what Conor remembers his father saying to him when he was young.
Despite the singing career, the small acting career and the many fans that cheer for him night after night, nothing was as scary as seeing blood in his underwear after filming with Joe. Having just gone home, sore after Joe had shocked his stomach several times for his childbirth video, the blood make him scream out, alerting Jack to his plight.
Busting in, Jack took one look at the blood and Conor's face before scooping him up and holding him tight, calling Josh to 'fucking get my brother to the hospital right the fuck now' and trying to stop his massive panic attack from happening.
Pale and shaky, time blurred and he found himself in a paper gown, Jack holding his hand and Josh off somewhere on his phone when he heard the doctor speak.
'I'm sorry, Mr. Maynard." He didn't hear much after that.
Conor had a problem with writing songs, sometimes. He just didn't have the will or the inspiration enough to do so when it was needed. But now...he had something. Something that he didn't know he had in him that was gone.
He cried for a long time and Jack promised him that they would keep this away from the press before leaving him. It was quick and painless, he barely felt anything except the tears rushing down his pale cheeks.
He felt empty. Upset. Stupid. He didn't know...what to feel, really.
"Don't wait for your ship to come, swim for it…Close your eyes and sleep, I'm right here my dear…"
He sang in the dim lights as it grew dark around him and the edges of his heart, like it could still feel it.
"You will never know, how much you mean to me...I'll always be by your side, my love…"