Author's Note: Three cheers for my favorite Skylanders Bros.: Terrafin and Drill Sergeant! But however much I like them, Skylanders isn't mine, as you all know.
Upgraded
Terrafin grumbled under his breath and folded his huge arms in front of him. He had been so patient as to not say anything snappy or harsh, but he finally couldn't take it anymore. No one took up as much time as Drill Sergeant when it comes to choosing upgrades.
"Oi, you done or what?" he grunted. "Don't you think it's my turn now?"
"I apologize, sir," Drill Sergeant said, "but I am currently trying to choose between Power Charge and Auto-Blaster."
"That's easy," Terrafin grumbled impatiently. "Pick the one that makes a huge explosion."
"A huge explosion?" Drill Sergeant frowned the robotic kind of frown and turned to face Terrafin. "I'm afraid not many of my attacks emit a huge explosion, sir."
Terrafin groaned. "Well then, choose anything. Y'know what, choose the one with the cooler name."
Drill Sergeant looked even blanker than usual. "Forgive me, sir, but I cannot choose based on their names alone, because the upgrade I pick will affect my battle strategies."
"Well, whatever. Just hurry up, will you?"
"Yes, sir." Drill Sergeant turned back to Persephone to finally choose an upgrade that he thought would make an advantageous effect on his battle strategy. Terrafin couldn't help but roll his eyes. He didn't understand why some people made some easy things seem really complicated.
...
A few minutes later, it was Terrafin's turn to stand in front of Persephone. Finally! It was his turn now. Finally, he could pick a new attack so he could kick some drow butt with even more flair (assuming the land shark had flair in the first place). Finally, after Drill Sergeant had taken up so much of his time.
Um, speaking of whom...
RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE.
"MEEP! MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP." RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE. RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE. "MEEP! MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP."
Terrafin's face darkened and he closed his mouth, which had been on the verge of saying the name of the upgrade he wanted. How was anyone supposed to concentrate in this horrible din?!
"Wait a sec," he said to the fairy, then whirled around. He was just in time, too. Had he not turned around, a yellow laser would have gotten him on the arm.
"DRILL SERGEANT," he snapped.
The Arkeyan robot rattled to attention next to him. "Yes, sir! Drill Sergeant reporting for duty, sir!"
Terrafin's face reddened considerably. "Ugh, how many times to I have to tell you NOT to call me 'sir'?!" he barked. "And that's what you came up with after you've spent so much time choosing? A laser pointer on your head?!"
"Please, sir! It is not a laser pointer, it is a laser shooter! And affirmative, sir! For the development of my battle strategy, sir! No reloading time! Faster hits! Sir!"
Terrafin glared at Drill Sergeant for a moment longer. The robot's blank, lifeless eyes stared right back at him. He stood at attention, and even then he wasn't completely silent. He was still emitting a rattling, clunking sound, as if he was older than a toaster from before Kaos' mother was even born. The thought suddenly took Terrafin back to quite a long time ago, when he had accidentally bumped his head on something made of solid metal when he was burrowing underground. That was when it came to Terrafin. Drilll Sergeant was old, centuries old. And he was now looking at him with empty eyes devoid of all feeling. No one could have managed to look so innocent.
Terrafin sighed. He knew he couldn't stay mad at Drill Sergeant for long. He was a robot. His mind wasn't any more sophisticated than a computer program. He was even supposed to be a mere servant in the first place. So why had he overreacted upon gaining a new laser shooter on his head?
His freedom, Terrafin realized. After being inactive for 10.000 years, after dodging the fate of becoming a servant for the rest of eternity, after being taken under Master Eon's wing as a Skylander, he had reasons to be excited. He certainly had his reasons, because not many Arkeyan artifacts enjoyed living another life after the fall of their empire. He was lucky. Or maybe it was what people call destiny?
"...Fine," he growled, but at least his voice wasn't even half as gruff as before. "Sure, you can play with that new toy on your head, as long as you don't hit me or anyone else. Got it?"
Drill Sergeant saluted, almost clonking Terrafin over the snout with one of his drills. "Affirmative, sir!"
Terrafin was about to turn back to Persephone when he paused as if there was still something else he needed to say.
"Oh, and Drill Sergeant?"
"Yes, sir?"
Terrafin sighed. "Don't call me 'sir'."
End