"What do you want?"
Nothing. Not a sound, not an answer.
"Ino, what the hell do you want?" he repeated defying her with his glare.
Silence was the only answer to his words.
Then, soft and uncertain: "I want to help you." Her hand started to rub his cheek, delicate on his rough face, that had not been shaved for days. Two days, to be exact. Two damned days since the world stopped making sense. Because you can find sense if someone makes you look in the right direction, and now, Asuma sensei wasn't there any more.
He wasn't going to be there anymore, and that was the harsh reality. Shikamaru never believed in paradise, vane promise of many religions, and now he tasted all the bitterness of skepticism.
"Go away," he said averting the hand that was trying to offer him comfort.
"I said go away," he repeated angrily.
She didn't move. He turned his back on her, as if that gesture could close matters.
"Shikamaru…"
Don't say it like that.
"Shikamaru…"
Justdon't.
"Do you want to help me?" he abruptly turned around, his eyes burning.
Ino nodded silently.
"Do you really want to help me?" he repeated, louder.
She repeated her gesture.
"…then go away!" was all he wanted to say.
But, he didn't say anything. He rushed to her almost violently, and glued his lips to hers while his hands were roaming everywhere, on her body. He bit her on the neck, feeling life pulsating in her, and that made him even more excited than ever.
Why do you let me do this to you ?
He put a hand under her shirt, caressing her breasts through the bra, while his other hand descended to lift her skirt.
Stop me, this is wrong.
She didn't reject him; instead she took his face in her hands and she kissed him with the same desperation he bore.
Then he understood.
It's all wrong.
They sought each other like water in the desert; they sought each other to find the comfort they could give to the other, right or wrong, it didn't matter. All that mattered were the two of them, and nobody else on this earth.
Thus Shikamaru's brain quit functioning. For the first time in his life, Shikamaru refused to think.
Feel was all he wanted.
And he felt her heart beating madly against his ear, that was against her breast while he lifted her skirt; and he heard her moan, begging for more while he freed himself from his pants and without further notice he entered her.
He didn't look her in the eyes during the process, he didn't have the heart to.
Perhaps he wouldn't be able to look her in the eye again after this night, not without thinking about the roughness and the need they shared now.
Maybe tomorrow…tomorrow, he thought, would be another day, another grief.
Now, this now, was a heated body against his own, hot and beautiful, for him. It was the gift he never dared to ask for.
Shikamaru, that normally didn't touch her if not in battle, was now entering into her guided by blind desire.
She was gasping on his body, biting her lower lip while she felt him thrusting in and out of her, seeking redemption.
She loved him, and she felt him now as never before.
She unexpectedly reached her first climax whereas only few hours earlier she had experienced the most powerful pain in the world.
She hugged him, spent, holding him close while he cried on her chest. And he sought for the hand he previously refused, and he searched for her strokes while he sobbed.
Then, abruptly, Shikamaru stood up.
He got dressed, not looking her in the eye. He sighed, not looking her in the eye. He then left, not looking her in the eye.