One day on the despicable little planet known as Earth, an odd little man named Ignamus Mortimer Meen crash-landed a helicopter in the tunnel network of Mimiga Island. For some odd reason, Balrog just so happened to be working with him.

Mr. Meen and Balrog explored through the caves until they reached Mimiga Village, where they peeked through a hole in the rock wall separating the two of them from the village and saw three adorable little rabbit-shaped children playing and chatting with each other; Quote and Curly had allowed them to stay there one more day before moving down to the Earth's surface.

"Balrog! What are the names of those cutesy little scamps over there?" IM Meen asked.

"I'm never telling YOU!" Balrog denied him.

"You WILL tell me, unless you want me to zap you again. We don't want that, now, do we?" IM Meen recommended strongly, placing his right thumb on the Balrog-zapper button on his remote.

"Uhh...NO, MASTER! PLEASE don't! I-I'll do anything for you, master!" Balrog begged desperately, trembling with fear.

"Good boy." IM Meen sarcastically complimented Balrog, patting him on the top of his rectangular metal body. "Now GO FETCH!" he yelled, tossing one of his so-called "Balrog Biscuits" (a rock with sugary sprinkles spray-glued onto it) through the hole in the wall.

"ARF! ARF! WOOF!" Balrog barked, revving himself up and charging directly into the wall, effectively busting right through it like the Kool-Aid Man. "OH, YEAAH!"

All three of the children screamed and attempted to flee into the nearest house, but, lo and behold, the door was locked! They pounded on the door with all of their might, hoping for someone to answer as Balrog peacefully ate his biscuit without bothering anyone.

"Balrog, you FOOL!" IM Meen scolded him, zapping him. "Try to bust through the wall more SILENTLY next time, would you please?"

"Dude, I'm busting right through a frickin' wall. You expect me to be perfectly silent?" Balrog pointed out.

"Well, perhaps not perfect, I suppose, but quiet enough to where it's inaudible-"

"Exactly! You don't get it, do you? They have giant fuckin' rabbit ears. It's pretty damned hard for them not to hear me when I bust right through a FUCKING WALL, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT WHORE MOTHER-"

And with that, IM Meen and Balrog broke out into a verbal fistfight.

"Wow, what are those two idiots doing? Also, haven't I seen that rectangular robot one before?" the children thought to themselves.

Once IM Meen and Balrog had finally untangled from their verbal (and literal) fistfight, they both introduced themselves. The children were quite shocked to know that Balrog was somehow working for this strange and peculiar man. They raised their hands to ask a whole bunch of questions, but IM Meen just wouldn't listen to them, much to their dismay.

"Now, Balrog, tell me their names." IM Meen commanded.

"Yes, sir!" Balrog replied.

"Okay...the girl on the left with the blue shirt is named Sue."

"The boy in the center with the glasses is named Jack."

"And the girl on the right with the green shirt is named...Toroko?! Oh yeah, that's right, I made a wish to a genie to revive her for some odd reason..."

"Personally, I think the one that deserves to be tortured the most is actually probably Jack." IM Meen concluded. "After all, he IS the one wearing those appalling nerdy glasses! FILTHY BOOKWORM!"

"DUDE, what the FUCK?" Jack replied disapprovingly, pointing a finger at IM Meen. "Alright, first of all, I'm 16, and second of all...what type of so-called torture do you have in mind?"

"FORCING YOU TO PARTICIPATE IN A MIMIGA YURI FANFIC!" IM Meen replied loudly.

"Ugghhhh..." And, just like that, Jack collapsed and fainted head-over-heels onto the ground. "Wake me up when I'm not in hell anymore..." he whispered to himself before losing consciousness.

And on that note, IM Meen suddenly and frighteningly broke out into his infamous song!

"OH, LOOK, Mimiga CHILL-DRENN! See them playing, having fun;

how I HATE those BUNNIE-WUNNIES, how they make my ***** cum!

I've got a little SEEK-RIT, that'll REALLY make em' cry!

It's a NASTY kind of magic, from a SPECIAL kind of guy!

This book is made to OR-DERR, but it ISN'T to be read!

When I open up this book, you'll FUCK inside instead,

in the most unpleasant place Jack's ever seen!

The magic fanny fic of I! M! Meeeeeen!

Very scary AND CONFUSING, sexual fuckery of MY CHOOSING!

Magic fanny fic of I! M! Meeee-hee-hee-hee-heehee-heen!"

And on that last word, he opened the book, sucking Jack, Sue, Toroko, and even Balrog right into it!

"Heeheehee...this magic pen ought to do the trick! Prepare to do my bidding, Sue and Toroko and Balrog! Prepare to do every wonderfully despicable thing I write in this sickeningly lovely little book, while poor, poor Jack watches! BOO HOO! Oh, I feel so bad for the poor little bookworm! BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO! HA, NOT!" the diabolical low-life douche melodramatically gloated even though no one was able to hear him.