Tactical Espionage Otacon!
by Karu Leonnese
Notes: I swore a while back that I'd use that title somewhere, and here you go. The History Channel is Zar's little running gag, but my brother is the one who has the fond little nickname for it. Very funny people, both of them.
Warnings: Um...fluff? Electric shock? Oh yeah. I'm not working with a Word program right now, so despite my best efforts to beta myself, I might miss something.
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"Be careful with those boxes. Don't crush them under the gun cases."
"Okay, but they're just boxes."
"..."
"Stop looking at me like that, Dave. It's creepy."
Otacon shoved the rather heavy gun case in the back to their rented closet, rearranging the clothes that hung there to hide it. Then he turned to his roommate, examining him.
Snake looked the tiniest bit flustered. And a lot uncomfortable. "What?"
Crossing his arms, he finally sat down beside the older man on his bed. "Well, this won't do at all."
Snake laughed dryly. "You're tellin' me. I dodge bullets for chrissakes. Of all the stupid ways to go down."
Otacon couldn't help but smirk. "I think falling down the stairs is a very noble endeavour."
Shoving him a bit, Snake rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that means a lot, coming from you."
"Hey..."
Slowly, he eased himself off the bed. He took one step forward and hissed in pain as he put his weight on his left leg.
Otacon jumped up, concerned. "Hey, what're you doing?"
Snake took another tenative step, managing to merely wonce this time. "Testing my limits." Another step and another pause. This time he clenched his teeth. "And going to the dresser. I'm gonna need to change before we can see the extent of damage."
He didn't say anything, but the look on Otacon's face told him he had no desire to see the 'extent' of his damage.
Instead he bit his lip. "What do you want me to do?"
It'd be easier for both of them to just let the engineer skip the scene of damaged muscle and tissue. Hell, Snake'd seen it all before and wasn't looking forward to this. "Why don't you look around here for a first aid kit, unless you brought one. Ans the strongest painkillers we have. That'd be great."
He nodded, happy to be of some use and relieved not to be forced to see what was under the left leg of the stealth suit. He hurried into the tiny bathroom.
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Snake's foot was broken in about three places. After coming to the conclusion that this was beyond the medical knowledge of either of them, they spent a few aggrivating hours in a local emergency room. They sat in the waiting room, Snake contemplating home surgery against his best interest. Did he really need a doctor that bad?
Beside him, Otacon stared through the same page of a magazine he'd flipped to when they'd come in. "I thought I was the injured one. You look like hell."
He smiled awkwardly. "I'm not too good with hospitals. Waiting rooms just kinda make you depressed, doncha think?"
"Yeah, but probably for different reasons."
The nurse called him about half an hour later. He shook Otacon, waking him from where he'd recently fallen asleep against his shoulder. One limping and one turning a strange colour of red, they followed the nurse through the door.
They could've sworn he had a fever.
The stay in the waiting room honestly took longer than the actual doctor's visit, at least in Snake's opinion. At least they gave him some stronger painkillers. Otacon's little asprins just weren't cutting it.
Back at the hotel, Otacon set him up on his bed, propped up with the pillows off both thier beds. After ordering out dinner and making sure Snake took his medicine--he needn't have been concerned, there was no opposition--he set up his laptop on the bed beside his 'patient'.
Snake was asleep within the hour, the previous mission and medication ganging up on him. Otacon switched from checking his collective forums to the intel work from their last operation.
They had a serious decision to make. They'd messed up the last mission with an inprotmteu trip down the stairs. He'd barely made it inside the building. Now they had a matter of days before whatever it was this new company had would trade hands. From the info he'd gathered, Otacon had put it pretty close to some sort of Gear activity, at least heavy military. Of course, he could be completely wrong, but the only way to know for sure was to get back inside.
Except their field man was in no condition to attempt such a thing. Not even the stealth and skill of Solid Snake could make up for a pair of clunky crutches.
Even the cardboard box couldn't save you then.
There was no choice but to scrap the mission. Delay it until Snake was healed, and then track the company once again. It's not like Otacon could sneak in there and retireve the information.
Wait...
He glanced over at Snake, passed out on his bed. If he told Snake about his plan, there's no way he'd let him do it, VR training and stealth camouflage or not. He'd probably try and do it himself, even with his foot in a cast.
There was no way Otacon could stand for that. He'd already endangered himself enough on one trip. This had to be done, and he was the only one capable of doing it right now. He was feeling strangely confident, a positive response to Snake's insistance that Otacon start some battle training. And he'd already proved the success of the camouflage in Shadow Moses; he could easily sneak into some small-time conglomerate with it.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he packed up his laptop and things. He left a note for his roommate saying he'd gone out--and to remind him to take his medicine on time.
As an afterthought, he decided on a bit of a good-luck charm. He carefully untied Snake's bandana. The painkillers had obviously numbed his system, as the normally alert man didn't even stir as the blue cloth was removed.
Tying the band around his own head, Otacon grabbed his equipment and quickly left the hotel.
The building proved harder to get to than in. He had to take a series of confusing public buses to get anywhere near the place. Even after that, he had to walk twenty minutes to reach the property. Thank god he hadn't tried to wear the stealth suit. That would've been hard to explain.
Getting inside was simple enough. There was only one guard at the door, but he looked about as big as Vulcan Raven--though thankfully without the six-foot cannon gun.
Switching his camo on, Otacon slammed his fist against the big glass entry doors. Alerted, the huge guard went to investigate. Seeing no one outside, he opened the door for a better look. Otacon slipped through, for once grateful for his small frame.
He ran through the lobby before the guard returned to his post. Deciding the elevator was a bit risky, he quickly ducked into a hallway.
Once he was sure he was out of sight, he took out his laptop, which seemed to anyone who might watch that it floated midair. It was tough to be intel and field man. After what seemed like an eternity, the computer booted up. Hacking into the security system, he pulled up the building's layout. He needed to find the computer that contained the most information about the company's new project. That would tell him where it was being stored. Although norally he could've gained enough information through the computer itself, it seemed like they were being very vague on what this project actually was.
It took a few minutes to find what he needed. The second basement. According to the layout, it was an underground parking garage. Who puts classified-info computers in a parking garage? Stowing his laptop back in his bag, he started back out.
Finding the stairs on the map before he'd put everything away would've been a good idea.
After a few minutes of unsuccessfully trying to locate a flight of stairs, he decided on the elevator after all. Fortunately Raven-guard was currently engrossed in a magazine. There might have been some trouble, had he seen the elevator button suddenly press itself. He didn't have to worry; he didn't even glance up as the elevator door opened. Safely inside, Otacon hit the floor button.
The elevator stopped suddenly at the first basement. Not expecting it, Otacon was pitched forward, slamming front-first into the wall. The stealth camo took the blunt of the blow and was crushed against the steel, sending a small electric shock through the surprised engineer. He yelped in pain, falling to his knees.
As the door opened to accept new passengers, Otacon realized through a haze of static that the camo was no longer working.
"Oh hell."
Two security guards stepped into the elevator. They immediately cornered him. "Who the hell are you?"
Think fast. He pulled himself up using the railing. "I'm, uh, the new intern. They kept me late."
They stared him down for a moment. Then one of them reached back--
--and hit the lobby button.
Otacon let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. The elevator reached the second basement and he stepped off, offering the guards a friendly wave.
Attention turned to the basement, he gave it a look-over. This certainly wasn't a parking garage. Otacon walked around, observing the equipment and machinery.
It certainly wasn't a Metal Gear spawn either.
He could've laughed. In fact, he probably would have, were it not for the sudden blow to the back of his head.
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The first thing Snake noticed when he woke up was that his medication had worn off. He wasn't happy, to say the least.
With the remedy came the second relization. The hotel room was short one Otacon. Annoyed, but not particularly angry, he instead put his efforts toward some of the leftover pizza and turned on the History Channel.
"Feh. History Channel. They may as well call it the Hitler Channel..." he grumbled around a pepperoni. "He wasn't the only one who did something historical, y'know."
He frowned. Otacon would've laughed at that. Some bedside manner, leaving his injured friend alone while he went...wherever it was he went.
"Hey...where the hell is my bandana?"
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The first thing Otacon noticed when he woke up was that he was in trouble. And pain. Couldn't forget that. He sat up slowly, taking in his surroundings. it looked like he'd wound up in a medical office. He'd been laying on a plastic cot, and they'd taken has equipment.
He sighed, slumping over. "I fail at the stealth game..."
The door opened and Raven-guard stepped in, trying to look menacing. This effect was cancelled out when he got stuck in the small doorway for a moment. Otacon knew better than to laugh.
"You gonna explain yourself or you wanna wait for the Boss to get here?" he grumbled.
Otacon blinked. It worked once. "I'm an intern. I got lost looking for--"
"Nice try," he interrupted. "We don't have any interns. I know you were checkin' out the second basement."
He frowned. "Honestly, it had nothing to do with what you've got going on down there."
"It doesn't matter. If you know about the secret project, the Boss' gonna have to deal with you himself."
"Can I at least have my laptop back?"
"No way. We're gonna use it to figure out what you were doin' here."
Otacon suddenly no longer found this man very intimidating, from a mental perspective anyway. "You don't know my password."
"You gonna tell us?"
"Um...no?"
He headed to the door. Even if Otacon thought he might have had a chance to run for it, there was no way even someone of his size could slip through the space Raven-guard left in that poor doorway.
"Whatever. Just sit tight 'til he gets here."
"Yeah, right," he muttered as he wastched the man leave.
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Snake was getting suspicious. It was getting awful late for Otacon to be out under mysterious circumstances, especially in unfamiliar territory. And he'd apparently taken his laptop. He knew this because the damn thing had an annoying alarm set for one of his animes, and the room was blissfully quiet.
And he took his bandana for some reason. God only knows what he was doing. He usually didn't go off without telling him where.
In fact, the only time he was vague was when...
"Goddammit..."
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From the next room, Otacon heard his laptop alarm. He whined. "I'm missing Chrono Crusade!"
Frowning, he started to form a plan. His laptop was in the next room. He didn't know whether there were guards in that room or not. He looked up, and found what he was looking for. Standing on the rather rickety cot, Otacon pulled the grate off the air vent. He struggled for a bit, but finally managed to pull himself inside.
He crawled through the vent, a little louder that he'd have liked. Wiggling through the metal tube, he followed the sound of his alarm to the room. There were indeed guards in the room. And fortunately for him, they were thouroughly distracted.
"Why won't this thing shut up?"
"I don't know! Do something! That song's bugging the hell outta me!"
Otacon pouted. Nobody appreciated his tastes.
"Oh hell. Just leave it here and let's go. I can't take it anymore. C'mon, it's not goin' anywhere!"
Well, at least there were small favours.
Once they were gone, he yanked off the grate to that room and jumped down. he grabbed his bag and laptop, shutting off the alarm without a thought.
"There, it stopped."
Oh crap. He looked around quickly. He was in a storeroom. Sometimes they just made it too easy.
The two guards he'd encountered in the elevator--what did this place only warrent three night guards?--trudged back into the small room.
"Hey...it's gone."
The other guard smacked his forehead. "I really need a new job."
They went about searching for the missing electronic. Neither of them noticed the cardboard box inch its way out of the door.
Tricks of the trade.
Suddenly the box resisted movement. He blinked in confusion before the cardboard was flipped over, revealing him. Raven-guard glared down at him, raising an eyebrow.
Otacon jumped up, dodging narrowly as he reached for him. Panicking, the engineer slammed his laptop into the guard's head. the large man fell back with a howl, and Otacon jumped over him and ran for it.
Medical room was on the first floor. Two, maybe three halls down from the lobby. He couldn't remember exactly.
Sneakers thudded against the tile floor as he ran, gasping for breath. He heard the large guard behind him. He moved pretty fast for a big guy.
The third hallway gave way to the lobby. Otacon shoved his way through the glass doors. He skidded to a halt on the sidewalk, momentarily at a loss for direction. The sudden starting and stopping of running was making him feel ill.
A car came down the road, stopping in front of him. What are the odds of hailing a taxi this far out of downtown? The back door opened and a hand grabbed his wrist, yanking him inside. The taxi sped off and Otacon looked bewhilderedly at his rescuer.
"What, exactly, in the fucking hell are you doing?" Snake glared at him.
Otacon shrunk miserably. "Getting sick..."
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"Do you have any idea how stupid what you did was?"
Otacon winced as he was scolded. Snake didn't even wait for him to answer.
"I can't believe you'd do something like that! I figured you of all people were smarter than that! What the hell were you thinking?"
He mumbled something, looking down.
Snake threw himself back on the bed. He'd done his triad and found his anger fading slightly. But not enough. "What?"
Otacon looked up suddenly, matching his gaze and surprising Snake as well as himself with his intensity. "I did it because I didn't want you to do it!"
Now that he was actually getting a return on some of the anger he'd given out, Snake was at a loss for words. More curious than anything else now. He still hadn't gotten the hang of these social situations.
After his first outburst, Otacon seemed to revert back to normal. Quietly annoyed. "If I had told you we needed to do the mission again, you would've tried to do it yourself. And...and I didn't want you to go back out there. You're hurt. I figured with the stealth camo I'd be okay."
Neither of them spoke for awhile. Finally, Snake looked over at the engineer. "You okay?"
Otacon smiled tiredly. "Yeah. A little lump on the head, possibly some electric shock..." Snake looked at him. "Er...I'm fine. Thanks."
"So what'd you find out?"
He suddenly started laughing. His roommate watched him, wondering vaguely if that lump on the head might have meant a concussion. "We definately don't need to be worried," he said finally, composing himself. "Their sercret underground military project is a video game."
"Video game?"
"Yeah, and it doesn't even look that interesting," he continued, babbling. "I mean, you'd figure they'd at least have some good programming since they're putting so much money into it, and why are you looking at me like that?"
Snake shook his head. "You're such a dork."
"Hey...I'm an infiltrator."
he grabbed the smaller man's wrist quickly. "No you're not. I'm gonna make sure you never do something like that again."
Otacon blinked. "How're you gonna do that?"
He smirked. "I'm never getting hurt again."
The engineer smiled at him. "Good. So...you were worried about me?"
"Of course I was, you idiot."
"Aww, that's sweet...except for the idiot part. So you're not mad anymore?"
"Oh no, I'm still mad."
"But why?" he whined. "I did okay! I finished the mission and made it back. Why're you still mad?"
"Because I was worried about you." he replied simply.
"I know, you said that already. I just think--"
He was effectively silenced as Snake yanked on his arm, pulling the smaller man toward him.
"I was worried about you," he repeated.
"Oh."
"How about next time, you leave the field work to me, okay?"
Otacon would've answered, but before he could, he was held at arm's length by the shoulders. He stared at Snake with wide eyes as the spy examined him critically.
"What?"
Just as suddenly as he'd done it, he pulled the engineer against him again, this time crushing their lips together as well.
After he broke away, moving to Otacon's neck, the other tried his best to form some sort of response, distracted as he was. "I thought...you were mad at...me..."
"I was," he replied, pausing to bite at his neck and smirking at the gasp that followed. "But the bandana..."
Not following, he reached behind his head to untie it. "Oh. You want it back?"
Snake stopped him, pinning him down on the bed. He leaned down to kiss him again.
"Maybe in a little while."
"Oh," he finally got it. "Oh my."
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Well, that turned out a little different than originally intended. Like, comedy and such. Oh well.