Want What You Can't Have

Summary – What if Drake's hatred towards Diana was actually directed towards the fact that he couldn't have her? One-sided DrakexDiana

I love her. There are so many reasons why I love her, yet my love for her has no reason. I don't express it because I also hate her. I hate the way that she speaks to me, like she can read my thoughts, like she actually knows every single damn thing about me. But she doesn't, she doesn't know me at all.

Clearly, loving her is paradoxical – and complicated.

She is beautiful. She isn't pretty, nor glamorous, nor drop-dead gorgeous. She is simply beautiful. Her beauty is in her grace, in her confidence. It's in her features I suppose, the way they were lined up on her face…but it was her confidence, her snarky remarks, the way she didn't back down from anything that truly made her beautiful.

She's not my friend, we're not friends at all, but I guess she and Caine are the closest thing that I have to it. Actually, I don't think that any of us know what the true meaning of the word 'friend' means. As soon as the FAYZ came up, we just seemed to gel together. Caine always had this charisma that had everyone following him, so it wasn't a shock when he was the one that stood up and became the leader of everyone at Coates Academy. Loving her has made me feel the most intense hurt I have ever felt. It hurts me every day to see her, yet to know I cannot have her.

Why can't I have her? Well, for starters, I'm not the kind of guy that usually falls for girls and she knows that. Plus, I seem to have a reputation about being a sadist. That's not a bad thing, it's true, but realistically, who would date someone like me?

Another thing is, she's in love with someone else – a guy. Caine. The moment I found out about this, my insides boiled and I wanted nothing more than to pummel him and tear him limb from limb. It was then, though, that I realized that he was the luckiest person on earth; he had gotten the most beautiful person on earth to fall in love with him.

Sometimes we're together, and I enjoy her presence more than anything – yet, I don't want to be near her, for being near her causes longing. I hate wanting her in a way that's completely unacceptable. I want to control every wrong feeling in my body, but I can't. I can't suppress my love for her. I hate it and I hate the fact that she seems to know that, and she hangs it over my head. A smirk here, a wink there, a taunt thrown in for added effect.

I dream of her. I dream of her everyday. When I dream of her, she's always happy. There are no dreams of kissing, nothing erotic, not even dreams of her proclaiming her undying love for me. All I dream of are her smile and the light in her eyes. That's my greatest dream – to see her happy because of me. All I want in life is to make her happy. Whenever she's happy, I'm happier. When she's in pain, I wish I could take all of it and put it in me instead.

Yes, I've come to the point of no return. I've fallen in love with her. No matter how hard I've tried to suppress my feelings, no matter how much I've realized how much pain loving her will cause me, I love her. I love her, and I will continue to love her.

Even if it means my love is unrequited.

A/N: Yeah, I know, I made Drake kinda OOC in this, but I figured that this could be the underlying reason why he hates Diana. At least, in my mind it is. I hope you guys liked it. Wow, this is my first Gone series one-shot/story. I may do some more depending on what you guys think. Constructive Criticism is welcome.

Cheers,

-Riles