An oversized drabble prompted by my pratty best friend. Typed out in an IM window in under 15 minutes. Random bit of fluff. Don't bite too hard.
Hakuba SaguruxKuroba Kaito
Another Unconventional Proposal
Kaito eyed the ring in front of him.
"Call me a sceptic, but this is a first."
"I sure hope so," said Hakuba with a smile. "Of all the years we have been -dating-, I wasn't aware that you were taken by anyone else."
Kaito raised two fingers. "OK, first, we weren't -dating-,"he decidedly ignored Hakuba's raised brow. "And second, I thought for once you were going to save me the pain of going into a full heist and just hand the gem to me."
"How very overly optimistic of you," Hakuba said sarcastically.
"You never recognise defeat even if it's staring at you in the face, do you?"
"Defeat? Hardly." Hakuba's cool demeanor was maddening. "Now, if we may get back to the matter at hand - I believe I am waiting for an answer."
Kaito decided playing the fool for a bit longer couldn't hurt.
"Answer? What answer? I wasn't aware you posed a question."
Hakuba sighed in resignation.
"Will you take this ring?"
Kaito looked surprised. "Why, yes, but-"
"Excellent. I now pronounce us husband and wife."
"What?" said Kaito a little too sharply. "But-"
"You may kiss me."
"Hai?"
"Or rather, I'd like to kiss you."Hakuba said matter-of-factly,"Head's up!"
Kaito clamped his hand over his mouth, and glanced around hurriedly looking for a quick exit. There isn't one.
Hakuba's smirk was drawing closer. "You said yes,"he prodded softly.
"You didn't let me finish!" Kaito exclaimed, "I was going to say -"
"You may have as many visits to Haagen-Dazs stores as you want, regardless of weather or season."
"That would be nice, but -"
"You will have two annual holidays to London, one in the summer and one during Christmas."
"Equally lovely, but -"
"You will have exclusive rights to my body and soul."
"- Now do I really want that?"
The corners of Hakuba's mouth twitched. Kaito tried his damn hardest to maintain his poker face.
"What I was -really- going to say,"said the Kaitou, "I would -like- to see the ring, of course, for the gem, but, no, lemme finish, as usual, after making sure it isn't Pandora, I'd return it to you. As usual."
Hakuba looked at him calmly. Kaito darted his gaze back and forth from the ring to Hakuba's hand, and let out a low groan.
"You just -had - to choose a ruby, hadn't you?"
"Why, yes," the Blonde sounded positively gleeful. "A detective must do everything he can to catch the eye of the pursued person."
"In other words, this is a bait."Kaito grounded out.
"Put simply, yes," Hakuba's eye had a low, predatory gleam to it. Kaito shivered involuntarily. "and you took it."
With a loud groan Kaito slumped backwards onto the bed. "Can I take it back?" he said weakly.
"Do you no longer wish to marry me?"
"No - I mean, yes - but no - but -"
"Make up your mind, my dear Kaitou."
"And STOP SMIRKING!"
Hakuba laughed as the other boy plunged at him, the unnecessary force causing them both to roll onto the floor.
"It's only formality, really," said Hakuba when they finally settled down, Kaito on top of him, bright eyed and flushed, hands on his neck. There was an extraordinary air of confidence around the young blonde. "We both know the answer. There wasn't even really the need for the question."
Kaito imitated his voice. "Wasn't even really the need for the question - my arse! Don't I get a say in this? I'm to be involved as well, you know!"
"Of course," said Hakuba, mocking surprise. "and you said yes."
"You -"Kaito was positively fuming. "You conned me into it!"
Hakuba smiled lazily."You fell for the trap willingly."
"ARRRRGH!"
"Careful now. Wouldn't want to strangle me before I amended my will and left all my money to you."
Kaito's hands stopped mid-motion in surprise.
"Amended?" he narrowed his eyes, "you are telling me you already drew up a will?"
"Of course," said Hakuba with a noncommittal shrug. "The day I decided to join your pursuit with the Black Organisation."
Kaito fixed his gaze at the blonde underneath him, there was the familiar warmth in his eyes and a even more familiar determination. He was reminded on the spot on how stubborn the British detective can be.
"Who did you leave all your inheritance to up till now?" Kaito burst out.
Hakuba eyed him. "Why, Watson, of course."
"Your -hawk-?!"
"I'm sure all my pocket money could sustain him for his short life. Ouch. No, that hurt. OK, I give up, it was to Nakamori Keibu's KID fund. Don't look at me like that, I'm not joking. We draw the money from the fund to buy coffee and replace stolen ties and shirts and the such…"
Kaito let out a frustrated cry and tightened his grip. "KILL!"
"OK, fine, go ahead," Hakuba closed one eye, "Make it quick."
"Any last words?"
"No."
"No?" Another surprise, "Really? Mr.I'm-so-eloquent-I-can-beat-KID?"
Hakuba opened both of his eyes and seemed to be deep in thought. "well, OK, one last kiss then."
Kaito knew it was a trap and another mistake, long before he instinctively let go of Hakuba's neck and buried his hands in the boy's hair.
…
"So, about getting married…"
"I'm not cross-dressing. I don't care. We don't have to get married in a church, anywhere's fine."
"Ah, so you will marry me!"
"…Don't. Look. So. Bloody. Surprised."
"Anywhere's fine you say? Why, I'm simply touched."
"Shut up. Shut up!"
"I always knew you had this unexpressed love for me, Kaito, day and night."
"Shut up or I'll…"
"Not if I get there first."
Have a guess what they did for shutting each other up… Yep, well done.
FIN
...Yeah. -hides-