Do you now how it feels when the love of your life hurts you….the love you thought loved you back? It happened 3 years ago. My name is Roxy and this is my story. I'm 18 now and I fell in love with my best friend. Ya everyone called them the Cullen boys. well when I was 15 my mom and there mom became bff's, so we became friends. We told each other everything. that's how I fell in love. You see I thought that jasper hale was just a friend at 1st but then when we stared to get to now each other I began to like him you now. The more I saw him and talked to him the more I liked him. Well hey had to go out of town and my mom had a job in forks .so we haven't seen each other in 3 years. Now its been 3 years and I hear that they are moving back to forks. Things had changed you now. I had grown and changed so much. When they last saw me I was a little chubby and curving with short hair and glasses. Now I'm a tall curvy girl with long jet black hair, no glasses. My mom told me that they were coming back one week b4. I was like ok and.

(1 week later )…………………………….......................................................

I was at the mall on a Sunday with my 2 best friends hazel (16) and Elizabeth (19). Hazel is Elizabeth's younger sister. Ring ring ring…. Went my cell. "hello" "hey baby r u almost home" "y" "cause there's someone here to see you" "really who" "oh come home and you'll c" "k I'll be there In a little k" "k bye" "bye" hazel: who was that. Me: my mom I have to go there's someone there to see me. Elizabeth: really who? Me: idk come lets go. Hazel: do u want us to come in with you you now just in case?! Me: no I'm ok I think I'll call k by Liz by haze!!!! As I waved I remembered what my mom said that they were coming back 1 week from today. Well when she told me that it was a Sunday. Me: holling crap it's Sunday!!!!!!!!! As I walked in I fixed my self. I pulled my hair out and let the curls hang, pulled my skinny jeans up and fixed my red tube top……………………………….............................

(inside)…………………. Mom: oh look here she is!!!! baby in here.

Me: mom can u not call me baby no more, I'm 18 I'm not a baby!!! When I walked in I saw someone no 5 someone's. The Cullen family. Crap I though. Mom: roxy remember miss and Mr. Cullen. And there kids Emmett , Edward, and jasper. I couldn't move I couldn't think I couldn't breath. I though I was ready to see them, I though I could stand here I front of them and not feel the pain that it caused me 3 years ago. But I couldn't I just couldn't. I wanted to cry to scream to run to my room and never come out. But I didn't…I just stood there like a stupid little fish who's about to get eaten. Mom: ba I mean roxy r u ok? Me: ummm im ok ummm… it's so nice to see u guys again. I forced a smile and went to hug them. They stayed for dinner but they didn't eat. After dinner I went to the backyard to get some freash air. I needed to get out of that house as long as jasper was there I sure was not getting near that house. Jasper: can we talk? Ugh what now. Me: umm sure why not. I was not in the mood to talk not at all. Jasper: so umm u changed? wow some question. Me: ya but u wow u look umm the same. I said smiling but this smile was not forced shocker. Him: umm so how's it going I mean new school new look. Me: it's going good I guess but y don't u just get to the point of this little meet-n-greet. Him: what do u mean? me: I mean what r u doing here after 3 years why r u coming back jasper why do u enjoy seeing me hurt. Him: what no. me: then y r u here!!!

I said trying to hold back my tears. Him: I never intended to hurt you I left because I cared to much about you to see you get hurt. Me: hurt hurt from what jasper from what. Him: I don't really know how to say this. He said looking at the ground he didn't even meet my gaze since I asked why he came back. Me: just say it plzzz!!!! I begged… him: it was hard for me to leave harder then I would have thought. But when we did I…..I couldn't stop thinking about you. He finally met my gaze him: roxy every where I went I saw u. like u were there to hunt me r something. I came back 3 years later cause I missed it here I missed my friends my school and most important I miss YOU!!!! Me: ME!!! Him: ya roxy when I saw you this afternoon I was shoucked I mean u looked beautiful. Me: but why did u leave me then if u felt so strong about me then y did u leave jasper why. As I said that I could feel the hot tears rolling down my checks. I was sobbing as far as I new. Him: I can't explain it at least not right now and not at all one time. Me: jasper my heart my heart I left it with you and you never gave it back. I couldn't love I couldn't feel I couldn't trust anyone. I don't wanna go another day thinking what if. What if I told you how I felt what if u felt the same. I don't wanna do that no more so im going to out there and tell u jasper that I. he cut me off. Him: ROXY I…I LOVE YOU ROXY NO ONE EVER MADE ME FEEL THIS WAY AS U DO. I just can't let u go.. not again. Me: u….. I couldn't even talk me: I love you to, I missed you soo much!!!!! As I said that I ran up and hugged him I hugged him like if he was leaving me again. I shaped his perfect musle body to mines and hugged him as hard as I could making his t-shirt wet and with black marks from my make up.

We can still make it

It was a clear summer daywhen I saw the tears on your faceI knew that our time was up on usOur moment of end was so fastbut the kiss of goodbye always lastsnot even time could fade it awayEven though you are no longer herethere is still something between usEven though life isn't fairI'll never lose my trustJust another lesson to be learnedgotta move on and not lose faithjust another obstacle to takelive my life before it gets too lateI won't give up, I won't stay downthis is what life's worth living forI still believe in loveI'm holding the warmth of your lipsit feels like the first time we kissedwhen all of the stars lined up for usbut like the wind you said goodbyeand left me alone here to crywe shouldn't have gone our separate waysEven though you are no longer herethere is still somethign between usEven though life isn't fairI'll never lose my trust

Me: wow I wrote that cool!!!! I said the next day in math class. Liz: did u say something roxy? Me: ya look at this song I wrote… liz: you write songs now wow what cant u do!!!!! Me: shut up just read….

Liz: wow this is good miss come here look at this me: no don't show here this is math class not writing songs class liz: shut up u have a A in this class besides we're done with out work. Miss: yes elizabeth liz: look at this song roxy wrote right now I think its about a boy she meet yesterday. Me: no it's not it's just a song miss: I don't think so this song is good you should go show miss. Butler the singing teacher. Me: it's just a song It don't mean nothing miss really it doesn't. Miss: ok whatever you say. I got my paper back and reread. Was it really just a song.. Was it really about jasper no it cant be I wasn't even thinking bout him till now. R was I????

Back at my house I could hear my mom and esma talking and laughing like old times like they never left. How can they just make things right again like things never changed how. Mom: so do u think roxy and jasper still like each other. I heard my mom say as I walked in. I just frooze and listened to the rest. Esma: I don't know roxy looked really hurt when we came back, jasper didn't stop smiling but when he went outside I think I saw roxy come in crying. Mom: do you think that she told him how she felt and he didn't feel the same. OMG I think they saw and heard more then I thought. Esma: I don't think so jasper was really hurt when I saw him at home like he was bout to cry. Mom: what do u think happened, is he dating someone? Esma: no not that I know I mean he hasn't look at another girl since we left and let me tell you the girls at his school r like running after him but he doesn't even give them the time of day, roxy is she dating. Mom: who roxy HA that's funny. [What does she mean ha that's funny!!!] mom: roxy said that guys suck that they do nothing but breack ur heart. Me: hey mom hey miss cullen how r u guys today!!! Mom: oh hi baby we r fine r u? me: ya I'm fine y wouldn't I be. Esma: we don't know roxy u looked really upset when we left last night. Me: who me oh no I was fine really I was I was just umm tired but I fine!!!!! [boy it's harder to lie to parnets and there friends then u think] mom: r u and jasper ok? When she said that I lost it I could feel my face become annoyed and mad the tears that I was so hard trying to hide this morning when my mom asked the same questions found there way up my eyes agin and this time they got out. I really did not mean to cry but just when my mom asked me bout jasper I lost the battle that I was having with myself. Mom: baby r u ok!!! Me: ya I….I….umm I don't know anymore mom I just don't know what to love what to hate!!!!! Esma came next to me and gave me a hug and I could smile the sent in her hair. It was like a ocean smell like a nice cold breeze blowing from the ocean in a sunny Sunday. I hugged her back. After I had told them all about last night I showed them the song I wrote in math class. Mom: so u love him baby. Esma: and he loves you to then whats the problem? They both looked at me confused. Did they really not see the problem was I just making up a promble in my head to protect myself. Me: I don't know I mean I thought I new this morning but now I don't know anything any more mom. I want him for ever and always. Hehehehe I now it sounds cheesing I now but I never felt this way not about anyone. Esma: baby u don't know how much he feels the same way when we left it was if roxy were here and if roxy that then this. It was sad and emmett and Edward wanted to kill him. Me: really ur not just saying that!!!!

Esma: honey I promise u have no idea how much u 2 r made 4 each other.