Hi! This is my very first Fan-Fiction, so bear with me. Phoenixes are born from ash, so flame on. And I know you're all thinking, 'Why are you making her such a slut?', but she just came across that way to me in the book. She was really forward, and she was already making out with Fang when he'd only been there for an upward of 3 days. So... yeah. out.

L POV:

"Alright, we have some new students today." Mrs. Cheatham said in her dull monotone. I gave an exaggerated toss of my hair, portraying my annoyance. Cuz, I mean, like, who likes new kids? They're always so dorky and weird. Unless they're, like, guys , and they're hot. Cuz that changes everything.

I looked cautiously over my phone (which I had been testing with under my desk) and to the front of the room. Mrs. Cheatham was wearing her super-ugly sweater vest thing for old people, and next to her were two guys. They were, like, TOTAL opposites. One of them was really pale, and had reddish hair and really milky blue eyes. The other was totally, TOTALLY hot. I mean, for cereal. He had that whole dark skin/dark hair/dark eyes thing going on, and he was really workin' it. He was wearing these black cargo pants and a black tee-shirt, and was looking all around the room, scrutinizing it, glancing at windows and doors. Like he was memorizing every detail. Weird...

Any way, so these guys were at the front of the room, in front of the blackboard. Mrs. Cheatham had this whole fake-excitement look on her face, and she turned to face the boys.

"Tell us about yourselves." She said, her sweater vest practically blinding me. The light one spoke first.

"My name is Jeff. Jeff Walker. And we're from..." He paused, as if unsure. WTFitch? He didn't know?

"... New York." He gestured to Senor Smexy, who was looking all impassive and hot at the moment.

"I'm F-Nick." He said in this low voice. Mr. **** Paused as if waiting to say more, then sighed and said, "Two empty seats in the back of the room."

I was already getting ready to totally nail this Nick guy as my boyfriend. He was way too good to pass up.

~CHEESYPAGEBREAKOFSCIENCE~

"You may now disperse for study hour," Mrs. Cheatham said, monotonous as ever. And her sweater vest was still tacky as ever. Ugh.

Now, for a lot of you dorks, study hour means obediently researching and doing homework. For me, it was the 3 T's: Talk, Text, and... uh... Tease. That'll work.

So, I immediately decided to go flirt with Monsieur Macho. He was standing kind of awkwardly by his desk. Of course, he did it hotly. He does everything hotly, so whenever I describe him, just assume it's hot, kay? Save some time.

So, yeah, I'm walking toward Nick (hot name, right? Okay, moving on), already working up the charm. I decide to take it easy at first, then crank it all the way, make it obvious I was flirting. It was a good approach; it had worked on the best of them.

"Do you know where the dictionary is?" I said sweetly, opening my stunning green eyes wide. He turned to look at me.

"What?" He said in the hot, deep voice he had. His face was still passive. Geez, strong, silent type, huh?

"Our reference materials are over here," I told him, pointing a perfectly French-manicured nail toward their spot under the window. "When we have free study time, you can walk around and do homework. If you need to look up stuff, the computer and other references are over here." Wow, I am GOOD at this! I didn't know I had remembered all that crap!

In response, the guy blinked. "Oh." He said off-handedly. "Okay. Thanks." Not a man of many words, huh? I gulped, feigning the cute nervousness I've heard guys go for, and stepped closer.

"I'm Lissa," I said, sweet and innocent as ever. "And you're Nick, right?" Man, I was working it! This guy was playing right into my hands. I am a flirting GENIUS. In fact, I think it's time to go full blast. I opened my eyes a little wider, batted my eyelashes.

"Uh-huh," He said warily. His jaw twitched slightly, but his face stayed nonchalant. Was he nervous? Or... irritated? No, definitely nervous. I've been told I have that effect on beings of the male variety.

"I'm glad you're in our class," I told him, looking up at him through my eyelashes. I didn't think it was too far. Almost not far enough, I figured.

"What? Why?" He said. I fought the urge to giggle or swoon at his ADORABLE cluelessness. He must not get out much, to not recognize flirting!

I stepped even closer, our bodies just inches away, and gave him my most dazzling flirtatious smile. I knew he must be totally smitten by now. I mean, who could resist ME?

He scrutinized me, obviously checking me out. Finally, the faintest of blushes coloring his swoon-worthy olive-toned cheeks, he said, "Oh... uh, okay."

There. That's it. With my full, dazzling grandeur, I get an "Oh... uh, okay." Seriously? Is he, like, forbidden to date or something? WTFitch?

Before I could do something embarrassing, like tell him off, the bell rang. His blush already dissolved, he grabbed his stuff, tapped Ol' Pale's wrist twice with his fist, and walked off. Just walked off. Not even a goodbye. Can you say 'hard to please'?

Geez. And they say girls are the confusing ones.

~CHEESYPAGEBREAKOFSCIENCE JR.~

Okay. Now I knew his deal. He was slightly awkward, but mostly just silent. Not really shy, just... quiet.

His sister was making a splash, too. Seriously, you couldn't go down the hall without overhearing an in-depth assessment of her 'bod'. For reals. And honey, that used to be me, so I'm not happy at all.

O Sexy One, Jeff, and their sis (I think her name's, like, Alex or something masculine) are, like, ALWAYS together. For cereal. And they always look all serious, too. Not even joking around or anything. Most of the time, Nick stayed a little longer in the classroom, always the last one out. A perfect opportunity to catch him alone. My (needless to say, brilliant) plan was in action.

He was looking at this DNA poster-thing. Ew, I hope he wasn't all nerdy and science-y. I stepped up next to him like I was studying it, too. Mutual interests get the guys, I always say.

I couldn't, for all the Coach handbags in my walk-in closet, figure anything out from this poster. Seriously, it was all like, "Deoxyribonucleic acid is formed from the biglongword of the biggerlongerwordIcan'teventhinkofpronouncing." But he was acting like he got it. Once again, he better not be a nerd, not for all the trouble I've gone through.

I fought the urge to say awkward turtle. Instead, I tuned to him, smiling keenly, and said, "Are you single?"

There you go, folks. Take it from a pro, it works every time. Guaranteed.

He tuned to face me slowly. "Uh..." He said awkwardly. See? What'd I tell you. He's speechless.

He looked like he was debating something in his mind. Well, kinda. It was hard to tell with the whole 'emotionless mask' thing. But I think so.

"I... I guess." He said finally. I guess? What the Aeropostle did that mean? Maybe he, like, had moved away from a gf, or something. And felt bad. Whatever, it was still technically a yes.

"Good. I hoped so." I said, stepping so close to him, his breath tickled my forehead. He smelled like Axe. I could breathe it in all day.

Now, here it goes, the deciding moment. Make it or break it, buddy.

I leaned in and kissed him. His lips were soft, and at first he was stiff under me. C'mon, I did EVERYTHING for you! Pulled out all the stops! Geez!

But eventually, he kissed me back. Amateur for sure, but still pretty good for a newbie. I give it a 7. He snaked his arm around my waist, and I knew that sealed the deal. This would be enough gossip fodder to last a month.

I heard a slight rustling near the door, then footsteps down the hall. NIck abruptly broke of our little smoocharoo, turning away. He wordlessly slung his binder strap over his shoulder and left.

And I was still there a minute later, utterly shocked.

~CHEESYPAGEBREAKOFSCIENCE III~

This guy demands a new approach. I call it 'Innocent, Sweet Trailing-After', my BFFL Kaitlynn calls it 'lovesick puppy stalking'. Whatever. She's only had, like, 3 boyfriends.

Anyway, so I kinda trail after him. Not, like, stalkerish-ly, just so that he gets the message I want to talk. Quite frankly, I think it was genius on my part. Just saying.

So, today we're going to DC. LIke, touring the White House and stuff. BO-RING. But I could make the best of it... namely because me and Nick were 'partners'. That meant I had to sit next to him on the bus. Score one for Lissa.

I slide in next to him all nonchalant and innocent, and clear my throat as cordial as can be. He turns to face me.

"Yeah?" He said blankly. But that's okay. I planned on this. I knew what to do.

"I was just... wondering," I said, all embarrassed and apologetic and such, "where our... uh... kiss puts us." Boom. That's right. Take it from a pro. I swear, I gotta patent some of this stuff.

He looked at me. For, like, ever. FINALLY, right when I was about to start getting panicky, he said, "Oh. Uh... I, I guess we're... kinda... together? Maybe...?" He said awkwardly. And hotly. Simultaneously. Don't ask me how, I don't know.

I flushed with faux excitement. "Good. I'm... I'm glad."I said, blushing like a maniac all the while. Really, I don't know where this stuff comes from sometimes. I should get into the soaps.

And he blinked. And looked out the window. Back to Square One, I guess. I fought the urge to sigh.

I 'worked up my courage'. "Well then," I said, confident but with a slight quiver, a real masterpiece. "I guess we should..." I cleared my throat. "Get to know each other? Maybe?"

He turned to face me again. "Sure." He said coolly.

And that's it. Just call me Mrs. Nick Walker.

~CHEESYPAGEBREAKOFSCIENCE IV~

And now we're, like, power couple of the century. I swear. Of course, he never really says anything, but I, of all people, can carry a conversation along.

"-so then I was like, OMG! You got a problem with my body glitter? And he was all, in DENIAL! Yeah. For cereal. That just happened. And then-"

"Alright! We're here. Everybody out!" Mr. Hackenberg hollered in his I'll-take-no-crap-from-you-whippersnappers tone. I rolled my eyes.

"I'll finish that later," I told a slightly alarmed-looking Nick, and waltzed purposefully down the aisle. Nick followed shortly after like the obedient little boyfriend he is. Aww.

So, the White House? TOTAL snooze fest. Seriously. I mean, like, it was just red room full of precious antiques, blue room full of precious antiques, GREEN room full of precious antiques... Yeah. I think you get the picture. But, the bright side was that I was totally attached to Nick at the hip the WHOLE TIME. Okay, on three now: One, two, three, SQUEEE!

Finally, FINALLY, we got to the souvenir store. Historical landmark? No way. Shopping? much more my style.

So, I'm hanging on to Nick's every-however rare-word, and he, like, tolerates mine, but it's a step. He's learning. We're looking out the window and it's all romantic and such, when suddenly that Alex chick comes up. Rude... we were having a MOMENT here! Geez.

"Excuse me," Alex-or-whatever-her-name is said tightly, like she was angry. Shouldn't I be the angry one? "I don't see An-Ariel." She was speaking exclusively to Nick, totally ignoring me. What was up with that?

Now NIck was scanning the crowd, looking all around the room for this Anariel character. One of the stranger names I've heard, but hey, why not.

I figured now was a god time to play nice with the family, so I smiled sweetly at Whatsername (AN: Love that song from Green Day!).

"You're Nick's sister, right?" I asked politely, my eyes wide and innocent. she looked at me like she was suppressing some emotion.

"Uh-huh." She said, with a hint of annoyance. WTFitch did I do wrong?

Nick turned to face O Nameless One. "I'll go look." He said firmly, walking away without even acknowledging me. She Who Shall Be Nameless Forevermore followed. Was I missing something here?

I stood there awkwardly, waiting for Nick. Why had he left? Why was... erm... Nick's sister so mad at me? Who was Anariel? If this had been some kind of mystery novel, that is what I would have pondered. Instead, I mentally ridiculed Sadie's lame sneakers.

Finally, FINALLY, something happened. An excited murmur echoed around the room. Suddenly, an ADORABLE blonde-haired, blue-eyed

little angel came into the room, teddy bear in one hand... President in the other.

Yeah. For reals. This kid had the PREZ in hand. All these guys in black suits and earpieces like in the movies were standing around, looking all official and serious. I couldn't see what they were saying, but it appeared that this was the elusive Miss Anariel. The 1st grade teach was falling over herself, thanking him and apologizing at the same time.

And Nick never came back.

~CHEESYPAGEBREAKOFSCIENCE V~

Nick hardly ever speaks to me anymore. I'm like, what the heck? Something happened the day of the field trip he's not telling me about.

Anyway, I'm sitting here in math, all bored and crap, when there's a huge crash out in the hall. I figured it was some klutz that knocked something over, and went back to pretending that I cared abut integers. But then, some freak comes running down the hall screaming gibberish. That was weird. So, you know, I'm craning my neck, trying to figure out who it is making a complete and total fool of themselves, when guess who I see? That's right. Jane Smith herself, Nick's nameless sister. And instead of groaning and putting his head in his hands like any NORMAL embarrassed person would do, he leaps out of his chair like some kind of sexy gazelle and sprints at, like, superhuman speed for the door. I'm have this total WTFitch moment, and everybody is getting up and going to see what's going on, and Kristin is stepping on my ballet flats, and Michael is elbowing me in my Hollister top, and everything smells like lots of bodies and BO. Gross.

The big, smelly crowd moves as one big mass toward outside, following some nut job who is related to Nick, Nick, 2 blonde kids, a black girl with horrible hair, and the pale one. The principal and some teachers are racing after the people, yelling something I can't quite make out, when suddenly all six, count 'em six, twerps leap into the air and whip out wings and they're flying away and everyone is yelling and it's loud and shocking and smelly and weird.

And all I can think i that I didn't stay with the mutant freakazoid.

Yay! First FanFic! If you didn't know, 'for cereal' is like 'seriously', or 'for real'. My 16-yr-old cousin says it. She also inspired the body glitter statement; she actually said that, seriously. And when Lissa says Fang is 'checking her out', he's actually checking out the lethal/nonlethal distinction. And when she says WTFitch, she's saying What The Fitch, as in Abercrombie and Fitch. Just thought you should know.

You know the deal, R&R is virtual love. I beg of you, with Fang, Gale, and Iggy clones on top! How can you resist that?