Oneshot about Rory and her daughter. A little Literati too! Gilmore Girls in't mine.
Rory picks up the laundry basket, using her other hand to drink coffee. It backfires and she spills down her shirt but not, thankfully, over the pile of clean clothes. Holding the basket carefully in front, Rory makes her way into her daughter's bedroom where she deposits the clothes on the bed. Annie has her own wall dedicated to Yale and Rory smiles as she looks up. When she was ten Annie suddenly announced she wanted to go there because her great-grandfather did, and has shown no signs of changing her mind.
Annie is out, at the library, and won't be home until dinner. Rory suspects she'll be spending some time with her boyfriend, Matt, but Annie barely talks about him. They have been together for three months and Rory has had roughly three conversation with him. Annie brought him home for dinner once, after her parents' insistence, and there have been several pieces of awkward smalltalk as Matt waits for Annie at the door. When Lorelai asked if she approved, all Rory could do was shrug. He is a boy in Annie's chemistry class and is infatuated with her daughter. One time Rory walked in on them making out pretty heavily, thankfully both standing, but it was enough to throw her. "Dark eyes, looks a little dangerous?" Lorelai teased and Rory groaned. At least he doesn't smoke.
As she folds the T-shirts and sweaters the door suddenly opens. Annie comes in with Matt and when she sees her mother she says,
"Oh, hi."
"Hey," Rory says, trying to smile. "I thought you were at the library."
"I finished early," Annie says. "Matt walked me home."
Matt smiles awkwardly and Rory tries to return it. No one says anything and just as Rory is about to try Annie kisses Matt's cheek. Rory looks away until he's gone, hearing his mumbled goodbye and sees Annie reach for the clothes.
"Hey, let me."
"I was just about to put them away."
"I can do that," Annie says quickly but she doesn't open her drawers. Rory waits a moment until getting up, a little confused.
"So we'll be eating around seven. Does Chinese sound good to you?"
"Sure," Annie says, but it doesn't sound like she heard. "Mom, I need to study some more."
"Okay. I'll call you when it's ready."
That evening she, Annie and Jess sit around the table, a rare occasion of late. Jess often finishes at odd times, depending on book promotions, Annie has been coming home later and later and Rory sometimes has to be prodded into leaving an article alone. She imagines this dinner being like something you see on TV, where they all chatter and share jokes, but tonight they are all in their own world. Jess tells Rory about the new author they've published and she tells him about the new story they're working on, but Annie simply asks for the salt.
"Feeling succinct today?" Jess asks and Annie finally looks up.
"Something like that."
"Any reason?"
"Just tired."
"And I bet the fact that you were up past midnight talking had nothing to do with it."
Annie's cheeks pinken but she doesn't retort and Rory groans,
"Annie! It's the middle of the week!"
"It's fine," Annie says irritably. "I wasn't late to school."
"That's not the point, you need to sleep!"
"I did," Annie says shortly. She swallows the last of her noodles and gets up. "I need to go and study some more."
"That better not be code," Rory warns and her daughter ignores her, taking her plate to the dishwasher and slotting it inside. Rory waits until she hears her shut the door and then turns to Jess.
"How did you know she was up so late?"
"I woke up and went to the bathroom and her light was on."
"You didn't tell her to turn it off?"
"Oh, it went off when she heard me. When I got back to our room I could hear her talking again. She really has to learn to be more subtle."
"She needs to get a decent sleeping pattern," Rory grumbles. "Who was she talking to?"
"Who do you think?"
"Oh, great."
"Rory, she's got a boyfriend. Remember how we used to call each other all the time?"
"Well, I wish she'd call him during daylight."
Rory gets up, taking their plates and when she closes the dishwasher with more force than necessary Jess says,
"Rory, relax a little. She's still doing fine in school."
"I know. It's not that."
"What is it then?"
"It's nothing," Rory says, leaning against the counter. "Annie came home early and was acting a little weird. She wouldn't let me put her laundry away."
Rory groans as Jess's eyebrows go up and adds,
"I think you had to be there."
"I think you're overthinking it," Jess says. "Did she spark up when she was there too?"
"Oh, shut up. It was nothing."
Jess goes over and gives her a kiss.
"Hey, let's watch a movie. There's still some takeout left."
They set it up, along with popcorn, but Annie doesn't join them. Rory keeps glancing over to her door but her daughter doesn't acknowledge them at all. She emerges to get water and has that frown, when she's thinking about something, but doesn't look up once.
That Saturday Rory goes to Stars Hollow. Annie and Jess have gone to Philadelphia, as per their tradition. Every so often, the two of them go out for a day in the city, and don't come home until evening. Even when they fight, they go, and it's usually the trip which repairs it. Rory is relieved that this time she's going to see her mother alone, and can talk at ease.
"Hey!" Lorelai cries as her daughter parks the car, running over to her. "I do believe it's that elusive Gilmore girl!"
"I've heard she's older now, more sad," Rory jokes, but her smile is faint and Lorelai frowns.
"That sounds like more than a line. What is it?"
"It's nothing," Rory says but Lorelai looks her in the eye.
"Come inside and tell me."
They go in the house and Lorelai puts on a pot of coffee. She lets it brew, hands her daughter a cup and says,
"Talk to Mommy."
It feels good not to be the the mother for once. Rory lets out a sigh and says,
"It's Annie."
"What's she done this time? I told her to clean up after the bikers trashed the place."
"Mom."
"Because you know, she loves those parties," Lorelai teases but she asks seriously,
"What is it?"
"I don't know - it's probably nothing."
"But..."
"She was up all night talking to her boyfriend."
"And?"
"And I don't want to her to wreck her grades," Rory says defensively. "But the other day I went into her room, to put her laundry away, and she took the clothes and waited until I'd gone."
"There's something in the drawer."
"And I know you and Jess - what?" Rory says, caught mid-argument. "There's something in her drawer?"
"If she's acting weird about you putting stuff in there then yeah, probably."
Rory's mouth drops open and she lets the coffee splash with a thump.
"Like what?"
"Maybe cigarettes," Lorelai suggests. "I don't know, that's what I hid. Under the tootise rolls, I mean."
"Tootise rolls?"
"They make a mean combination," Lorelai grins and then says,
"I don't think Annie's smoking though."
"Well, now I'm thinking it! She doesn't talk to me, Mom! She's met this guy and it's all about him and she's studying, or she says she is, or she's calling him and she needs to go to college and she's still only eighteen!"
"Whoa!" Lorelai exclaims, piutting her cup down and taking her daughter's arms. "Excuse me, when did the subtext turn into the text?"
Rory doesn't answer and Lorelai says gently,
"Annie's eighteen. She has a boyfriend. It doesn't mean she's going to quit school."
"That's what you freaked out about."
"Excuse me, I seem to remember somebody refusing to go to Chilton!"
"Okay, fine, but you also didn't like me seeing Jess."
"And it looks like somebody is starting to see where I was coming from."
Rory sips her coffee so as not to answer and Lorelai asks,
"Do you hate her boyfriend?"
"I don't hate him," Rory says slowly. "I hardly know him. He came for dinner once and didn't talk unless we talked to him, and every so often we make weird smalltalk when he comes over to take Annie out. He likes her a lot, I know that. He seems okay, I guess."
"You can't stand him."
"I just wish Annie would tell me more about him," Rory says, clutching the cup. "I know the basic details about him and he told me about his family, but he's not exactly chatty."
"Not the type to change the water bottle, huh?"
"Oh, shut up," Rory says, making her mother laugh. "I know what you're getting at."
She finishes her coffee and then adds,
"But there's something which may or may not be under tootsie rolls?"
"I bet it's love letters," Lorelai grins and Rory says,
"Thanks to you I'm picturing cigarettes or worse."
"Honey, I know Annie. It probably is just love letters. Or maybe her drawers were really messy and she was just embarrassed."
Rory laughs, feeling a little better and her mother hugs her. They go and watch a movie and when Rory gets home Jess and Annie aren't back. Hesitantly, Rory goes into her daughter's bedroom and slowly opens the drawer. All she sees are socks and, feeling stupid, she starts to shut it. The drawer gets caught on a loose sock and as Rory moves it she sees something underneath. It's a box and when Rory picks it up she gasps. It's condoms.
She stares and stares at what's in her hands and doesn't hear the door open. Annie comes in, laughing, starts to say,
"Mom, Dad and I -" when she stops. Rory looks at her and for a moment neither say anything.
"What are these?" Rory asks and Annie says,
"What they look like."
She sounds sullen, slightly nervous and Rory closes her eyes.
"Did you look in my drawer?" Annie asks, breaking her thoughts and Rory exclaims,
"That's not the point!"
"Yes, it is! I can't believe you!"
"Is there something you want to tell me?" Rory asks, struggling to keep her voice steady and Annie snaps,
"No, there isn't!"
"Annie, you are not getting pregnant!"
"That's why I got these!"
"Oh my God!"
Annie snatches the box from her mother just as Jess enters, exclaiming,
"What is going on here?"
Rory can't speak and Jess's eyes land on his daughter. Blushing bright red, Annie closes her hand over the box but from the look on Jess's face Rory knows he's seen what it is.
"It doesn't matter!" Annie shouts, stepping back from her parents. "It's none of your business!"
"Yes, it is!" Rory retorts, ignoring Jess's hand on her arm. "It is my business, young lady! We need to talk!"
"Well, I don't want to talk to you! You went through my stuff!"
"I knew you had something under the tootsie rolls!"
Annie stares, utterly confused and Rory adds,
"We are having a conversation!"
"You mean a lecture!"
"Hey," Jess says angrily but Annie cries,
"Leave me alone! I wish both of you would just leave me alone, I'm eighteen!"
"Annie -"
"I don't want to talk to you!"
She gets up, grabs her jacket and when Jess demands,
"Where are you going?" their daughter snaps,
"Out!"
She slams her way through the door but when Rory moves to go after her Jess says,
"Let her go."
"Jess!"
"Let her blow off some steam. If you go after her now she'll be even madder."
"She might go see him."
"Maybe."
"Well, that's not good! Didn't you see what she had in her hand?"
"Yes, I saw. I think we both wish I hadn't."
Jess takes off his own jacket and Rory exclaims,
"How can you be so calm about this? Annie could be having sex!"
"I'm not crazy about it," Jess snaps. "But we can't stop her, Rory. You know that. Remember when Luke tried making all those dumb rules about us? Those ten minute visits he used to make? Remember how well those turned out?"
"But what if something happens?" Rory insists. "What if she gets pregnant?"
"That doesn't have to happen."
"But it could! She's going to college in fall!" Rory sinks down on her daughter's bed, the offending box beside her. "Why didn't she talk to me?"
"Maybe she didn't know you'd take it so well."
Rory rolls her eyes but smiles a little and Jess sits beside her, squeezing her hand.
"Aren't you supposed to yell about tearing the guy to pieces?" Rory asks eventually. "Tell him he can't ever come back here?"
"I think you're doing a good enough job for both of us."
"I never said anything like that," Rory says hotly and Jess chuckles.
"You were getting there."
Rory shakes her head and says,
"I'm just worried."
"Me too," Jess says. "You know I am."
"So what do we do?"
"I guess we're honest," Jess says. "What else can we do?"
Annie comes back about an hour later. Her eyes are red but she seems calmer as she greets her father, looks icily at her mother and goes into her room. Rory is just considering going after her when her phone rings, making her jump. It's Lorelai.
"Hey," Rory says and Lorelai replies,
"Nice face you've got on there."
"You can't see my face!"
"I can picture it. You sound miserable."
"I found what was under the tootsie rolls. She's got condoms."
There's a pause and then Lorelai says,
"Oh."
"Yeah," Rory says, looking over at Annie's bedroom. "And I yelled at her and she yelled back and it was ugly and now she's shut herself in her room and won't talk to me."
"Oh, Rory."
"I know. I handled it all wrong."
"What did she say? Did she tell you she's having sex?"
"We didn't get to that," Rory says, scuffing her toe on the floor. "We were too busy being mad."
"I see."
"What am I supposed to say? I mean, I've given her the talk on being careful but I - I'm not ready for this."
"Rory, she's eighteen. She has a boyfriend. It's not a total shock."
"It's a shock to me! I don't know what to say to her."
"Rory, all you can do is give her advice. At least she's being careful."
"I always thought I'd be calm about this," Rory says. "I totally screwed up."
"Honey."
"I just don't want her to regret anything."
"So tell her that. It'll be okay, sweetie."
"I hope so," Rory sighs. "I's better go. Bye, Mom."
"Bye, sweets."
Rory knocks on her daughter's door and peeks around the door to see Annie at her desk.
"Can I come in?"
"You've already been through my drawers," Annie says but she softens and nods. Rory comes in, closes the door and sits on the bed, where her daughter joins her.
"So that was fun," Rory jokes. "Do you think the whole neighbourhood heard?"
"I think it stretched to Manhattan."
They smile and Rory says gently,
"I'm sorry I went in your drawer. I was just worried."
"You could have asked me."
"Would you have told me?"
Annie pauses and then asks,
"Would you have yelled?"
They sit in silence and Rory says,
"I'm sorry I shouted at you. I'm not mad at you."
"You sounded mad."
"I'm just worried about you," Rory tells her, looking in Annie's eyes. "I want you to be careful."
"But I am - that's what you got mad about."
Rory bites her lip and slowly asks,
"Are you sleeping with him?"
She looks over at her daughter who shakes her head and says,
"Not yet. I just got them in case."
"Not yet," Rory echoes. "Are you going to?"
"I don't know. Maybe."
Rory is saved from her thoughts by Annie adding,
"Are you going to tell me not to have sex?"
"No," Rory says. "I'm not."
She looks at Annie and this time she does put an arm around her.
"I just want you to think about it."
"I'm not going to get pregnant."
"I didn't mean that."
"Are you sure? Because you started freaking out the minute you found what I'd bought."
"Yes, I'm worried," Rory says honestly. "You know I am, Annie. It could happen."
"It didn't happen to you. Just because it happened with your mom -"
"Annie, you know it could. I'm not saying it will, but it's a risk. You know it is."
"We've already talked about this, Mom. When I started seeing him you told me to be careful and, look, I am."
"I know, but have you thought it all through? It's a big step."
Annie shifts, uncomfortable and says,
"I got them because it might happen. It's not definite."
Rory nods and then asks,
"Do you love him?"
"I don't know," Annie says quietly. "I like him a lot."
"Have you talked to him about it?"
"A little. I told him I bought the condoms."
"He isn't pushing the idea, is he? Because if he is -"
"No, Mom," Annie says angrily. "He's not. Just say you don't want me to do it! I know it's what you're thinking!"
"It's not what I'm thinking," Rory retorts, closing her eyes. "Annie, I'm not going to lie, I don't love the idea -"
"I knew it!"
"But I don't think it's bad, or wrong, or something you can't talk to me about," Rory finishes, looking over at her. "You can ask me anything."
"How can I when you yelled about it?"
"I was just surprised. Annie, I promise I won't be mad if you want to talk about it."
Annie nods ever so slightly, her blue eyes full of thought, and Rory says,
"I want you to be sure about it. I don't want you to regret it, or do it because you think you should. Do it at your own pace."
"Is that how it was for you?" Annie asks. "Were you sure?"
Rory is silent, and finally says,
"I didn't think it through."
"How old were you?"
"Twenty."
"In college," Annie guesses and, answering her silent question, Rory says,
"It was with my first boyfriend."
"You mean that guy who took you to the dance?" Annie exclaims. "But you broke up with him, right? You broke up with him and dated Dad."
"That's right," Rory says, wishing she'd thought of how to phrase this. "We got back together, briefly. It was a really stupid thing to do. He was married - he told me it was over but he was still with her."
Annie is staring in undisguised shock and Rory says,
"I didn't think it through."
"Are you sorry about it?" Annie asks and Rory exhales.
"I'm sorry about certain things," she says. "I should have thought more. But I don't want to change it."
Annie is silent and Rory says carefully,
"I want you to do it when it feels right. Annie, if - if you do wish things had been different it'll be okay. It's not always perfect. It's not the end of the world if it isn't how you planned. I just want you to think about it - all of it. And you can tell me. You can talk to me about it, if you need to."
"Do you think it has to be a mistake?"
"No, of course I don't. I would never think that. I don't think there's anything wrong with you wanting to or that it wouldn't be right. All I mean is - Annie, sometimes it's not how we imagine, how we wanted it. And if it's not, I want you to know that's okay. You can talk to me either way."
"You're not going to say Matt is never allowed back here?"
"No," Rory laughs. "Though I can't promise I won't glare."
"He's nervous of you, you know. You and Dad. You keep shooting questions at him."
"He never talks to us! How are we supposed to know anything about him?"
"He thinks you don't want to know him."
"Annie, you should tell me more," Rory says. "You haven't said a word about him."
"Because you don't like him. You think he's a distraction."
"I feel unsure about him," Rory admits. "But I don't hate him. I promise not to throw him out when he's next here, how does that sound?"
"Oh, perfect!"
"Hey, this could have gone a lot worse," Rory tells her. "My grandparents got their minister to try and talk me out of having sex."
"You're kidding."
"I wish. He was too late, anyway."
Annie laughs and Rory hugs her, breathing in the scent of her hair. She kisses her cheek and, when Annie moves away she asks,
"What's the betting Dad is going to embarrass me about this?"
"Hey, give him a chance."
"Right," Annie snorts. Rory smiles and asks,
"Did you have a good day together?"
"Yeah, I got a book and we found a new restaurant. Maybe we can all go sometime."
"I'd love to, Annie."
They smile and Rory gets to her feet.
"I'll go start dinner."
"You mean order a pizza?"
"Yes, exactly."
They laugh and Rory goes outside. Jess is reading but puts his book down, going to kiss her.
"Did you make a truce?"
"Just about. How does pizza sound?"
"Perfect."
That night, as she gets ready for bed, Rory hears Jess and Annie talking in the hall. She turns off the faucet and hears Jess say,
"Is it going to take you a week to look me in the eye again?"
"I don't want to talk about it, Dad."
"What do you think I'll say?"
"I don't want to know."
"I'm not saying anything," Jess says. "Only this - don't let me come home to a sock on the door."
"Exactly that," Annie groans. "Stop talking now, please."
"Can I just say this?" Jess asks seriously. "Don't rush it."
"Dad..."
"I'm not telling you what to do, Annie. I'm only giving advice."
"I heard it from Mom."
"And you can't hear anything from me?"
"As long as there's no sarcastic comments."
"No promises. So where did you go?" Jess asks, after a pause. "When you went out before?"
"Nowhere," Annie says awkwardly. "I just walked around the block and read the book I picked out - the one I showed you. It made me feel better."
"I know the one. I've done that in my time."
"You have?" Annie asks.
"More than once."
There's a pause and then Annie says,
"I should go to bed. Goodnight, Dad."
"Night, Annie."
Rory hears Annie go in her room and finishes brushing her teeth. Later, when she and Jess lie in bed, she asks,
"Do you ever wish your first time had been different?"
"I don't know," Jess says, leaning over and looking at her. "No. I mean, it wasn't like in movies, but no."
"That's what I said. Oh Jess, I hope she's careful."
"She's our daughter."
"That's what I'm worried about."
Rory smiles a little, in spite of it all, and Jess says,
"I don't know if I told you this, but -"
His voice trails away and Rory asks,
"What?"
"You were the first person it meant something with," Jess says shyly. "You know?"
"I know," Rory says softly. "I do know, Jess."
She leans over, kisses him and says,
"I think we needed that time - the time we were apart."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. It made me love you more."
Jess doesn't say anything but kisses her cheek, holding her close to him, and they lie content. Somehow it means more this way. Rory can't explain it and Annie wouldn't want to hear it, but she and Jess know. It's all that matters.
