7:30 PM

Justin Evans-Anderson knew two things about his adoptive parents, Blaine Anderson and Sam Evans, with absolute certainty. First, his parents loved him totally and unconditionally, even though he was not their biological child. The other was that his parents would never, ever pass up the opportunity to embarrass him, particularly if his friends were around.
So he was not exactly surprised when his dad Sam seemed to be interrogating his date, Daphne Davis, when she picked him up on their way to their high school's Sadie Hawkins dance. The questioning seemed to go a bit further than usual, though, and Sam was acting particularly gruff and almost resentful about the idea of Daphne taking his son out on a date—almost the stereotype of the "angry dad with a shotgun." Oddly enough, though, his other dad, Blaine, seemed to be keeping a wide berth from the living room, instead cleaning up after their dinner and occasionally stopping by to see if they wanted any dessert or a drink.
After a particularly pointed question about Daphne's "intentions," Justin felt like he wanted to run up to his bedroom and not come out until he was about thirty or so. Luckily, he was rescued from his ordeal—by a text from Blaine.
Go ahead and get out of here. Make up an excuse if you have to. I'll cover for you with your dad. Enjoy your date! Love, Dad.
Having gotten parental approval, he turned to his other father and quickly scoured his brain for a reason to leave early.
"Hey, Pop, we'd love to stick around, but I have to help the band with their sound checks, so we've gotta run," Justin said, grabbing Daphne's hand and leading her to the front door.
"It was nice meeting you, Mr. Evans," said Daphne. "Don't worry. I'll have your son home on time."
Sam, sensing something wasn't quite right but not willing to make more of a scene, let them go with a simple warning, "See that you do." He was finally joined by his husband, who smiled at his son and his date and offered. "Have a great time."
Daphne and Justin headed to Daphne's car, while Sam and Blaine watched from the window as the teens departed. Once they could no longer see the departing lights from the car, they closed the front door. Blaine then smacked Sam on the arm backhanded. "You're awful, Sam! How could you embarrass Justin like that?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"C'mon. You weren't treating Daphne as if she were the person who was about to defile your sweet, innocent only child?" Blaine teased.
"Okay. You got me. But what am I supposed to do? It's not as if we have any daughters, right?"
"Fair enough, Sam, but you've got to think strategically."
"Huh?"
"Well, babe, look at it this way. Justin is now at the age where he should be enjoying a social life with his friends, and maybe even a girlfriend."
"Okay. So what?"
"Well, some of that socializing might even take place outside of this house. And if he's not here, and we are, then we have the house to ourselves."
"And. . . ."
"And that means that while he's having fun outside, we can have fun here."
"Oh, so you mean we can play the new Call of Duty game?"
Blaine rolled his eyes affectionately. "Sure, we could do that," he said suggestively. "Or we could play some other games instead."
Sam, catching on to Blaine's tone, leered. "Oh yeah? What did you have in mind?" he asked, his voice becoming huskier.
"We could play perky British safety officer and charming Southern engineer, or maybe Mountie and Chicago cop?"
"Don't know those two. What are the rules?" laughed Sam as he let his husband pull him up the stairs toward their bedroom.

2:30 AM

Justin was desperately trying to sneak into his bedroom without waking his dads. He hadn't intended to be out so late. The date had gone okay—but it was clear that he and Daphne didn't have much of a romantic future. After all, Daphne was spending much more time checking out their mutual friend Josie rather than talking to his own date. But it was clear that he and Daphne were going to make great, great friends. He had found a soul mate, one who shared his true nerd heart. They had blown the dance off early and headed with their friends Kevin, Ollie, and Tracy to Daphne's place to play Settlers of Catan and Taboo. It was a truly awesome night, and it was only when everyone looked at the clock and realized that it was way past everyone's curfews that panic set in.
So, after having been dropped off by Ollie, he tried to ignore the three squeaky floorboards on the staircase, and tiptoe down the hall without making too much noise. He was almost made it to the door of his room when he heard a cry from his dads' bedroom, "Ow, Tina! Tina!", followed by a thud.
"Are you okay, Blaine?" he heard his pop shout. Out of concern, he decided to risk the consequences and knock on their door, still dressed in his date clothes. "Pop, Dad, are you guys okay?"
His pop opened the door; he could see his dad lying on the bed, looking okay but clearly embarrassed.
"We're fine," said Sam, somewhat out of breath.
"Are you sure?" worried Justin. "It sounded like Dad was in pain."
"Oh, it's nothing. We just realized that we're not as limber as we were when we were teenagers," smirked Sam. Engineer and security officer had been fun, but after a while, they opted to play quarterback and cheerleader instead. As Sam liked to say, "the old classics are always the best. Fact!"
Understanding what his parents were up to, Justin cringed. "Too much information, Pop!"
"Well, that's what you get when you interrupt us after your curfew. And don't think you're going to get off lightly this time. It's after two o'clock in the morning, Justin."
"I'm sorry, Pop. It's just that we were having such a fun time as a group that we totally lost track of time. I'll do my best not to let it happen again—at least not without letting you know first. Okay?"
"Well, that's a given, but it doesn't get you out of being grounded for a month."
"That might not, but I'd like to negotiate it down to a week."
"And what bargaining chip are you going to play for that?" asked Blaine from the bed.
"Well," said Justin, "shorten the punishment to a week and I won't tell Aunt Tina that you use her name as a safe word for your 'play time.'"
Sam and Blaine exchanged panicked looks, but quickly came to a silent agreement. "Deal," said Blaine, "so long as we never discuss this again."
"Trust me, I don't ever want to think about this scene again," promised Justin. "Good night, Pop. G'night, Dad."
"Good night, Justin," chimed both of his dads as Justin closed the door. Sam took this opportunity to turn out the lights and climb into bed with his husband. "G'night, Blaine."
"G'night, Sam," answered Blaine. Everything was quiet for a few minutes, but something was eating at Blaine's mind. Finally, he realized what was bothering him about the situation.
"Um, Sam?"
"Yeah?", answered Sam blearily.
"When did Justin learn what a safe word was?"