Jess stared persistently up at the baron ceiling that lay solidly above her, as lingering as the feeling she could not seem to shake. She had lain her head down on her pillow what felt like many hours ago, but try as she might the endless thoughts and whisperings ricocheting through her mind like bullets would not die down, and attempting to sleep had long since become a fools errand. It was a warm evening, verging on unpleasantly so, and Jess had managed to kick off her covers in an attempt to cool off so that they lay ruckled at her feet like ripples on calm water; yet it made no difference to her comfort. Despite her endless endeavors to set her mind at rest- fluffing up pillows, counting sheep, breathing deeply- sleep was not gracing her this evening, and she begrudgingly accepted that. She rolled over to glance at her bedside clock. The only source of light in the room, it cast a faint red glow onto the walls in an almost sinister way...3 am. She sighed, exasperated, and closed her eyes tightly shut.

All she could see was his face.

The man that she had happily shared a loft with for over a year now, with the kind face and the wise mind, that until now had never caused her to experience any such feeling...the feeling that had settled in her stomach hours ago. It weighed her down like lead, but simultaneously it was dancing, fluttering inside her chest like a hummingbird. It reminded her of the feeling she would get as a little girl the night before a birthday party, impatient and excited to adorn her hair with ribbons and wear her very best polkadot dress. She could not pinpoint what it was, what it meant- but she knew that it was his doing. Stupid, hopeless, pessimistic...caring, grounded and, dare she say it, overwhelmingly handsome Nick Miller. It had all started that evening, after their...eventful date had come to a somewhat unpredictable end, all thanks to her ex Russell's impeccable timing...

She had just drained the last remnants of wine from her glass, savoring the sweet, perfumed liquid as it ran down her throat, when she stopped for a moment to take a thorough look around her. She had definitely not eaten out anywhere this stylish or flamboyant in a long time, and secretly she thought it...unexpected that the person to treat her to it would be Nick- the man who had once tried to pay for an ultrasound with a mixture of unkempt paper money and loose change out of a sandwich bag. She felt a small chuckle well up inside of her as she thought of it.

That had been a good day.

Back then she had never thought of Nick as any more than someone she could rely on unconditionally. In the private solace of her own mind, she didn't skirt around the fact that there was an undeniable chemistry between them so tangible that she was often surprised it didn't incarnate itself before them. Despite the fact that most of the time the man drove her to the absolute edge with his careless ways, they would sometimes just share a moment. Nothing special, or out of the ordinary- maybe after some across the bar banter, but just a simple moment; where she would look at Nick Miller, into his deep, pensive eyes and he would look at her and something would just happen. She would feel that there was this entity of possibility that they both acknowledged but never spoke of. It was moments like that told her to not discount Nick Miller. To just, appreciate that there was something more to him that only she understood. So, naturally, when he asked her to go to dinner with him she had been perfectly content, and just a little curious. Maybe she was right not to ignore their undefinable always-something-there relationship. And that was without even mentioning the completely unexpected and more than a little weird boob grab situation that had occurred earlier that day...

She shook herself out of her daydream as she sensed something had gone wrong, due to Nick's suddenly panicked demeanor. He whispered to her harshly, hand conspicuously hiding his mouth,

"Jess, Jess, Jess, Jess? JESSICA, oh my god, turn around, look at the door- no the other door goddamnit, look Jess it's him, it's Russell!".

Just as he spat out the name that had months ago been so prevalent in Jess's life, the man himself appeared, dressed as heartbreakingly suave as usual in a suit that looked like it had been carved out of thin air by the gods themselves to totally and completely fit his stature. He was arm in arm with a beautiful, blonde woman several years older than Jess. Jess quickly looked up at him and flashed him a somewhat forced smile, and greeted him a little too loudly in order to try and drown out Nick's frantic mutterings. They exchanged awkward conversation for a few minutes, until Russell said something, just an off-hand comment, that was one of the things that would incessantly play on her mind that night.

"You two really are something."

And with that short, simple yet infuriatingly ambiguous statement, he made his excuses and walked off with his companion, out of the door of the restaurant.

That was how Nick and Jess had eventually ended up sitting side by side, on the rigid curb of the sidewalk, just close enough that Jess could feel the warmth of Nick's arm on hers through his crisp shirt sleeve. They were both suspended in lingering, uncomfortable silence. After they had cornered Russell outside the restaurant and confronted him about what he had said, the ultimate question that had been avoided all evening had been forced into acknowledgement.

What were they?

Encapsulated in the silence of the moment, Jess looked up. The sky was a deep, inky black by now, dusted with glittering stars that for a moment made Jess completely forget where she was. She had always loved stars. A warm breeze that carried the distinctive sweet smell of a summer evening caressed her face, and she closed her eyes as she breathed in deeply, knowing that sooner or later she would have to confront him. Just as she went to say something, she was interrupted by Nick's hasty interjection of the silence.

"Look, Jess, I'm sorry about how this all turned out. I just...I just wanted to take ya somewhere nice, somewhere fancy. And who should turn up but goddamn fancyman himself. I hope you still had a good time."

He didn't look her in the eye but stared, disappointment on his face, out into the evening air. Jess couldn't stand to see how hurt he was; she felt a well of affection as she looked at him, dressed in his shirt and tie. He had clearly put in a lot of effort for her, more than she had ever seen him with any of his previous dates. She sighed and shuffled round to face him.

"Nick, that wasn't the problem. Before Russell showed up we were having a great time! My problem is that I don't know what this is...what we are! You can't just grab my boob one moment then run away from every suggestion that this is a date. What am I supposed to think here?"

He merely shook his head defeatedly. "I know Jess, I know. I'm an idiot. I'm sorry."

At this he looked up, and their faces were inches apart. It seemed to Jess that the mere close proximity of him to her made him a small smile appear on his face, and he looked at her, straight into her eyes. Jess felt something begin to dance in her stomach. The vivacious atmosphere that had greeted them when they arrived at the restaurant had died down, and they sat surrounded only by the sounds of how the breeze enveloped the trees around them, and the occasional muffled siren in the distance. Time seemed to slow enough for Jess to take a good, long look at the man in front of her- his eyes, brown like mahogany never failed to mesmerize her. An approaching passer by snapped her back to her senses, and she attempted to regain her composure.

"Okay, Nick. Here's the deal. From now on, no funny business. We do middle school dance rules, three feet on the floor, no body hugs."

Nick looked defeated for a moment, but then a small smirk played on his lips.

"Is that what you want?"

"Yep."

"You're sure?"

"Uh-huh".

"Great."

"Awesome".

Nick looked at her intently for a few moments, and then began nodding his head very slightly as if he had decided upon something.

"Okay."

And with that, he got up, dusting himself off in the process, turned to face Jess, and definitively offered her his hand. He had rather suddenly taken on the demeanor of a man who totally and completely knew what he was doing, so naturally Jess was a little taken aback. She gave a nervous, slightly confused chuckle as she said,

"Nick, what...what are you doing?". He shrugged, playfully.

"What? You want middle school dance rules, Jessica, you're gonna get 'em. Get on up here." He gestured with his hand for her to take it, so hesitantly -not to mention still very confused- she clasped her hand into his and allowed him to pull her up off the sidewalk. She straightened up and there they stood, facing each other, still hand in hand. Nick didn't let go. Jess felt her heart quicken as Nick's eyes seemed to roam over her face for a few moments, then he gently took her remaining hand. She felt his coarse skin on hers and Jess noticed that it just felt...right. She smiled slightly, looking questioningly into his eyes. Then, slowly and tentatively, Nick began to sway, side to side.

Literally, sway.

Keeping one hand clasped around Jess's, he moved his other hand to place it gently and reservedly on her hip. At this, Jess went to protest but was interrupted by Nick who said, very fast-

"Just go with it Jess I don't really know what I'm doing but I think it's romantic I hope it's romantic whatever man I don't know just yeah okay I'll shut up."

And with that, before Jess could even begin to protest, he was leading her in a genuine, middle school-esque, dance. He was rocking them both this way and slowly leading them both into the empty stretch of road.

They were dancing... in the middle of the street.

Before long Jess had forgotten about her confusion and they were both in fits of laughter, twirling and swaying and just not giving a second thought to what was going on. Nick let Jess elegantly twirl with his arm and as she collapsed into him he let her fall slightly to the floor and held her there. Their laughter slowly died down. As cliché as she knew it was, Jess felt the world around her begin to loose it's significance. The distant sirens and sounds of the city became even more obscure, and Jess could feel her chest heaving as she caught her breath. As one looked into the eyes of the other, with equal affection and desire, every moment they had ever shared seemed to culminate in that one small gesture. It was almost as if she now saw Nick in a completely new light, one that illuminated everything about him that she had always loved. With that, she felt something ignite deep in the pit of her stomach. It felt like a diverse combination of elated happiness, desperate sadness, apprehension, excitement, and curiosity all at once. It made her breath catch and her head fuzzy and-

And now here she was, that feeling still embedded, unmoving, within her chest- it having prevented her from coming anywhere near sleep for hours. Back at the restaurant, several minutes had passed with them suspended in that moment before both had suddenly come to their senses, embarrassed and awkward, and had begun the walk home back to the loft. They had barely shared some uncomfortable small talk on the journey, had said a very brief goodnight at their doors and both departed their separate ways into their rooms. Now here she was, feeling restless, conflicted and just downright confused. She had never felt anything like the passion and yearning she had felt in that one moment, and the source of it all lay just across the hall.

Nick Miller.

Who'd have thought it.