EDWARD THE SPARKLING VAMPIRE
I figured at least one more anti-Twilight carol wouldn't hurt. The first part of "Breaking Dawn" is already out, and already I'm hearing talk of how terrible it is. It's considered the weakest book in the series, and all Miss Meyer has to say is that people need time to "get used to it". Frankly, I consider her whole series weak. I give her credit for trying to write a full novel (because those things really are tough to write), but her work falls rather short of the bill.
I've never been crazy about vampires or werewolves, but I feel these books do them a terrible injustice. No one takes them seriously anymore.
Original Song © Johnny Marks
New Lyrics © unicorn-skydancer08
Twilight © Stephenie Meyer
All rights reserved.
You know Vlad the Impaler and old Nosferatu
Dracula, Chocula, and Count von Count, too
But do you recall
The most infamous vampire of all?
Edward, the sparkling vampire
Twinkles like a Christmas tree
And if you ever saw it
You would think you've gone crazy
All of the other vampires
Jeer and scorn and call him names
They will not let old Edward
Join in any vampire games
He will stalk you, day and night
I regret to say
In fact, this guy shines so bright
He would make a great strobe light
And how the fan girls love him
As they all shout out with glee:
"Edward, the sparkling vampire,
You'll go down in history!"