So I was going through Tumblr posts today, and came across a headcanon about Shi and Yuanji, which suddenly inspired a one-shot about my new favorite pairing! :D Let me know what you think of it (: Keep in mind that Shi was born in 208 A.D, Zhao in 211 A.D, and Yuanji in 217 A.D. Kinda weird, the age differences, but hey, I didn't create them!
Disclaimer: Sadly, KOEI owns all. Those butts. _
"Shi, Shi! Look Shi, I made you a drawing!" exclaimed the diminutive young girl of 10, running along the corridor with her blonde pigtails bobbing behind her like two little antennae, before stepping out onto the balcony where the members of the Sima and Wang clans were convened and to the little corner where Sima Yi's sons lounged. Her blue eyes gleamed with pride as she proudly showed off the rather comical interpretation of Sima Shi in her own vantage point, mysteriously dressed in a robe that looked more like a lady's dress than a male's hanfu.
"That's… beautiful, Yuanji. But, when did I get a dress?" the young man asked, his brows rising quizzically as he took the thick parchment from her outstretched hands. His younger brother leaned over to nosily peek at the drawing, before falling back into his chair with an uproar of laughter.
"Shi, you look like a concubine, a very ugly one," Zhao snickered, being the immature boy of 16 that he was. His eyes were warm with humor, and a curl of his lips suggested a hint of mischievousness.
With a grunt, he quickly jumped out of his chair to avoid the jab being delivered by his older brother, who looked displeased at his younger brother's rude behavior to the young girl, whose large eyes were brimming with upset tears.
"Do you not like it, Shi? I couldn't draw your robe right, but I thought you would love it anyway!" Yuanji mumbled miserably, her lower lip wobbling. Her cheeks were pink with exertion, and she began puffing out air from her cheeks, a frown growing on her features as she glared at Zhao.
If Shi was able to, he would have face-palmed at that exact moment, for once again, Zhao was being a complete idiot to the girl he was supposed to end up married to. That bastard, making a cute girl like Yuanji sad. Didn't he realize that Yuanji would be kicking his butt every single day in revenge?
"I like it very much, Yuanji. This will be going up on my wall, so the next time you visit, you will see it," Shi grinned, patting Yuanji's hand and reassuring her, before shooting a glare at Zhao. Typical Zhao, leaving the coaxing of his betrothed to Shi.
"Promise, Shi?" asked Yuanji, mollified.
"Promise, Yuanji."
"Will you draw me too, Yuanji? Make sure I have a prettier dress than Shi, okay?" Zhao grinned lazily, flicking a piece of paper at Yuanji, who scowled at him in return.
"You look like a monkey, so no."
"Don't insult the monkeys, Yuanji…" Zhao pretended to gasp, an evil smirk on his face.
"You don't even compare to a monkey, Sima Zhao," Yuanji sniffed, unaware that her parents and Shi and Zhao's parents were amusedly listening in, stifling laughter that was meant to sympathize with the abashed and dumbstruck Sima Zhao. Lady Zhang Chunhua reddened with the restraint of laughter on her part, and reminded herself to never let her son live it down.
"What goes around comes around, Zhao," Shi smugly explained, leaning back in his chair, as Yuanji strutted back to her table of paints.
"Zhao, you need to mature, and you're running out of time," Shi sighed, setting his book down onto the rich lacquered desk in front of him and glancing up at his 20-year old brother, who sat on the other side looking as if he didn't have a care in the world.
"Don't you think Yuanji is cryptic enough for us both, Shi?!" the younger man sputtered, looking at his brother in disbelief, unable to comprehend how much more serious Shi wanted things to be.
"Yuanji is mature, disciplined, and you need to learn the difference," Shi grimly stated, seriously wondering if Zhao would ever grow a pair and prove himself to be better than he was four years ago.
"Shi, you suck the fun out of everything, didja know? Relax a bit, breathe, will you? Don't be another Yuanji!" complained Zhao, who really didn't get why his brother was so iffy.
"Zhao, when you marry Yuanji, you will be responsible for caring for her. She becomes your obligation, "Shi glowered.
"Perhaps you don't love her, but at least give her that one thing. Care about her. You can go, mull it over, for all of our sakes." Shi continued, glancing up at Zhao, who was tapping absently on the tabletop.
Shi had watched the young, effervescent girl grow into a beautiful, cultured young woman who was honestly too mannered and serious to be compatible with Zhao, but Sima Yi had believed that her polar personality would reform Zhao, which Shi doubted would happen. If only circumstances were different… Yuanji… Shi shook his head. What was he thinking? Yuanji had been betrothed to Zhao for years, he couldn't possibly be thinking of her that way. Could he? Standing up, Shi began to pace the study, a new torrent of emotions crippling his mind. All the years of protecting her when Zhao wouldn't, it hadn't helped him; it only made himself fall for her, Shi realized. Raking his fingers through his dark mass of hair, Shi sighed, knowing what he would have to endure. He could have told his father that he would have willingly taken Yuanji's hand in Zhao's place, it would have been so much better.
"Too late now, Shi…" he muttered, returning to his desk and glancing up at the painting on the wall, with its broad, bright brushstrokes and Yuanji's little signature cramped onto the bottom. He only had a few months left.
It was dark outside, but the hour wasn't past midnight. Candles still burned here and there in the Sima mansion, and in one of the rooms, Wang Yuanji read the Art of War by candlelight, in the library. As her wedding day neared, she was filled with nerves and jitters, but she had to admit that a part of her was excited. Over the years, Yuanji learned to deal with Zhao, although his lack of discipline still annoyed her to the bone. At least Shi was around to help her deal, she happily thought, resting her chin in her hand as her eyes drifted into space. There had to be at least several times when Yuanji silently questioned why she wasn't chosen for the older Sima brother instead, who fitted her tastes much more than his roguish younger counterpart. She could actually talk with Shi for hours on end, and not have to start screaming at him for constantly getting off-track during serious discussion. Heaven's will, she told herself, for Yuanji was not one to allow herself linger on impossible fantasies and give herself heartache.
Footsteps on the stone floor snapped her out of her stupor and Yuanji stood just as a figure rounded the bookshelf near her, stopping in his tracks. It was Shi, with an armful of papers and a surprised look on his handsome features. Flushing slightly, Yuanji smiled and inclined her head at her future brother-in-law, before quietly greeting him.
"Good evening, Shi."
"Oh. Yuanji. What are you still doing here?"
"Reading. Sorting my thoughts. What are you still doing here?" Yuanji smiled, smoothing out her blue dress, before clasping her hands together.
"Uh, just organizing some paperwork for Father before retiring, as per usual. I'm just a bit late tonight, since Zhao kept me distressed for the better part of the afternoon. Another lecture is another useless few hours of my life," Shi shrugged, mustering a half-smile, feeling a bit guilty at how unkind his remark sounded.
Shaking her head, Yuanji sighed.
"Who knows how long it will be until it gets to him…"
Appraising Yuanji, Shi noticed she looked paler than usual, as if she was overly exhausted. Now that he noticed that, she didn't look too well. It worried him, really.
"Say, Yuanji… have you been okay? I know we haven't spoken much in a while, wedding plans and politics don't mix. You don't look well," Shi remarked, placing his papers onto the table and crossing his arms as he leaned against the shelf.
Smiling softly at his concern, Yuanji shook her head and merely quoted, "'Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.' Unless you are Wang Yuanji, because you're always strong."
Shi laughed quietly, before noting, "The Art of War, how befitting of you."
A small sigh escaped him as he watched her, and Yuanji suddenly felt all the emotional turmoil threaten to break through her cool façade.
"Shi… before I marry Zhao," she slowly spoke," I should probably tell you that I simply wish things were different than they are. You might know what I'm implying and if not, then all the better for me."
His eyes met hers, before Shi carefully and slowly took a few steps closer, whispering, "I know, Yuanji."
His dark, bold eyes travelled the soft curve of her defined cheek, before flicking up to see her eyes watching his with a remorseful light. Shi wanted to kiss her, just once. It would suffice for the rest of his life, for it was his fault that she wasn't his. He just wanted to tell her, to get it out before it constricted him more than it already was.
"Yuanji, I have something to say, before I lose my chance to," Shi mumbled, cautiously taking her small hand into his.
Yuanji nodded, entwining her fingers between his with a shaky breath, wondering if what was happening was even real.
Shi slipped his arm around her waist and slowly pressed his lips to hers softly once, twice, three times. And each time, he felt like life was torturous, that fate was cruel and destiny was unjust. Shi never was the type to be emotional but in that small moment, he hurt.
Yuanji's eyes fell closed as his lips softly touched hers, and it felt like her whole insides were wrenching at how twisted life could be. She would have to live with it, Shi would have to live with it and Zhao would be completely oblivious, because, let's face it. When was he ever aware? It wasn't right for anyone, and Yuanji hated it.
As he slowly pulled away, he was taken by surprise when Yuanji stopped him and kissed him once more, a lingering kiss that made him wish he could just vanish with her forever. Slowly letting go of her hands, Shi watched as Yuanji's eyes misted over with a screen of unshed pain, before turning and starting to walk back to his quarters.
"Goodnight, Yuanji… I love you. I really do, just remind yourself everyday."
4 Months Later
Shi stood on the balcony of the large hall where the banquet had taken place, watching brokenly as the carriage bearing Yuanji and Zhao moved farther and farther away from him. It was all over, he had to shut her out now, and for as long as he lived, Shi would watch from a distance. He would have to pretend like he never fell for her, and close out every bit of feeling he ever had. It would be better to forget than to remember and see the reminder every single day.